dance like a butterfly

The touch of love is like a timely rain on the wasteland, which diffuses from the sky in an instant, moistens every corner of my heart, and then penetrates into my dry and stubborn land little by little, slowly infiltrating the deep layer Soil.My grievances were steaming and slowly evaporating on the wasteland.When there was only a piece of moistness left in my heart, I obediently surrendered to this long-awaited relationship.

In the end why am I obsessed with such love?Is it my own mental immaturity?Is it because my personality is not perfect enough, and I need a big wall to block the wind?Or an inexorable and intense obsession with the male body?Or is it for a kind of self-satisfaction after enjoying and playing with other people's will or body again and again?Or is it a kind of self-love that cannot be satisfied, and wants to see the shadow of oneself in a person many years later?Or is it just to verify your ability or charm?

I can't find the answer, I only know that at this moment, I have a person I love, who deeply bowed his once rebellious head for me, and he is ready to give up a lot for me.

I dare not think about it anymore, after the kiss, I am tired, like a wall, dividing my time and thoughts into pieces.

When I opened my eyes, Lao Han was still sleeping on his side with his arms around me, looking at my face, and smiling.

"What are you looking at? It's embarrassing to see people!" I seemed to be blushing.

"I don't want to watch you, what if you run away again? I'm still waiting for someone to bring you back? I don't know if it will be returned to Zhao." Although Old Han smiled and spoke, there was a bit of a sour taste.

"What are you talking about? I didn't do anything to apologize to you, I swear?" I was in a hurry. If Lao Han really misunderstood me and Chen Hanzhang's ambiguous relationship today, then I would be smeared in my crotch, and it would be fine. It's over.As for how the relationship between the two of them will be in the future, I don't want me to be a trigger for people to be contemptuous.

"If I, Xiaohui, do something wrong to Lao Han with Chen Hanzhang today, tell me Xiaohui to go out and be crushed to death by a car!" Before Lao Han could say anything, I hurriedly cursed myself.However, does Chen Hanzhang's malicious grab today count?I'm a little apprehensive.

Lao Han smiled and twisted my lips: "Who promised you to swear?"

I stuffed Lao Han's thumb into my mouth, sucked it, and purposely smacked the baby's breastfeeding sound.

"You, when you get angry, you can harden people. When people feel sorry for you, I really wish I could cut off the meat and eat it for you! What a living ancestor!" Old Han let out a long breath.

Under the light, Lao Han's face exuded a dizzying ruddy color, his short haircut stood straight up, and even his ears were ruddy, and his thick earlobes looked extraordinarily charming.I caressed his face, faintly feeling the prickling sound of the stubble hanging on the skin, and then stroked his neat thick line-shaped beard on his upper lip like touching the keys of a piano with my fingers, feeling very satisfied.

Yes, this man has given me infinite vision for the future, how can I bear to trouble him in the days to come?

However, when it comes to Chen Hanzhang, I still can't stop saying: "Brother, that Chen Hanzhang and you..."

Lao Han took his eyes back from me, glanced at me, and said with a guilty conscience: "You want to hear it? Then you promise me that you will not be angry or be inexplicably jealous?"

I regained my energy and tapped the little cherry in the bushes of his chest hair with my fingertips, "You have to tell the truth, don't lie to me!"

"What are you lying about? Besides, it's all in the past. Now, almost we don't play tricks anymore. If I feel the same way about him as I do about you, I can't lie on your bed again today!" Old Han raised my finger, I tapped on the tip of his tongue, put my hand aside, and stood up to light a cigarette.When the cigarette butts flickered, the smoke slowly lingered, and the story began.

In the succinct narration of the lush and prosperous years, I seem to be able to see how the two soldiers in green uniforms have a good impression of each other and look forward to each other.

I can see how the two people, unable to resist the cold, held hands tightly together on the big bunk in Tianshui, Gansu Province in winter, how they trembled as they walked over each other's strong body with restlessness.

After stroking each other's hands, after a kind of soul-stirring chill, we can see the tired smiles of both sides.

I can see one standing guard outside at night, and the other lying on the bed restlessly, looking forward to the brain.

I can see the simple but simple care for each other when you wash my laundry and I bring you boiling water.

I can see their bewildered eyes eagerly looking forward to the dark.

I can imagine Chen Hanzhang from soldier to squad leader, from platoon leader to battalion commander.When Han Jun was demobilized and heard that Chen Hanzhang had been promoted from battalion commander to deputy regiment level, a feeling of disappointment made him scratch like a cat.After all, in terms of same-sex love, this was his first love.

"Did you really like Chen Hanzhang at that time?" I asked softly.

"Looking back now, it should be more sexual anguish and venting. At that time, people were honest, unlike now. You young people can find a huge group through the Internet. At that time, you sneaked around like thieves, thinking that there were only two of us in the world. There is something wrong with my personal psychology."

"Then how did you get in touch later?"

"On the day of demobilization, Chen Hanzhang wrote down my mailing address and wrote me letters intermittently."

"Have you written to him?"

"Brother only replied to him one letter, that is, after receiving his first letter. Brother, I don't like climbing dragons and phoenixes. Now that he has become so prosperous, I slowly stayed away from him. Seeing that he couldn't receive a reply, he Then I stopped writing slowly.”

"But, later on, you got in touch again."

"Chen Hanzhang's hometown is from Henan. After he transferred to the public security system in Xi'an, he met him in Xincheng Square seven or eight years ago."

"What happened later? Do you still do it frequently?" This is the center of my concern, and I pressed on.

Lao Han had already smoked a lot of cigarettes, so I took out one and lit it myself, and put it on for him.

"I just got in touch. Sometimes I do it, but not often." Lao Han glanced at me carefully.

I was cruel, there was a question I didn't want to ask, but I still couldn't help it.Circle the circle with the thumb and index finger of the left hand, point to the circle with the index finger of the right hand, and ask him: "Have you ever done this before?"

Lao Han immediately understood, he stretched out his hand with a smile and tore my mouth open: "That's why you're such a scoundrel."

I let out a long breath, and my heart finally went back to my stomach.

"Then you always only use your hands?" I uncovered the quilt, turned around, pouted my mouth, and bit his white and beautiful pink-headed little brother, "Have you never been like this?"

Old Han smiled, and slapped my butt, "Very rarely, maybe it's because I don't have enough affection. Playing with him and being with you are absolutely incomparable."

I covered the place where I was photographed, and shouted with bluff: "You executioner, you strike so hard. When you mention Chen Hanzhang, you want to beat me to death, and you want me to make way for him? You are so beautiful, your little Hong Brother will tell you directly, just two words: No way!"

After finishing speaking, I went to pinch Lao Han's nose and pull his ears.

That beauty in my heart.It seems that the relationship between Lao Han and Chen Hanzhang is more of comrade-in-arms friendship than comradeship.Time is really a versatile thing, it can turn a strangeness into a meeting and love, and it can also slowly interpret a feeling innocence.Although they have the same love as the first love, they have been able to release each other's anguish, but they do not belong to love.

Whistling, I took a shower.

When I came out, I suddenly thought of the two days when I was with Hao in Lintong.I want to tease Lao Han.

Wrap your legs from ankle to knee with toilet paper, like wearing white stockings.Wrap toilet paper around her buttocks, like a miniskirt.Wrap a circle of toilet paper around the chest, stuff two pieces of paper on the chest, and use it as a breast.Finally, use toilet paper to make a hood on the head.

Looking at myself in the mirror, I was taken aback.

People rely on clothes and horses rely on saddles, and if I make my eyes more frivolous, I will be a plain and stunning beauty.

With bare feet, I walked out of the bathroom softly in a kind of catwalk, and swayed slightly. I made a peacock head with both hands and made a pose.

I decided that no matter how disgusting I am, I will make Lao Han disgusting this time in my life.

I didn't know whether it was joy, surprise, or disgust, but Lao Han let out a "huh" first, and then burst out laughing.