dance like a butterfly

☆, 256

I am very eager to be with Lao Han to truly enjoy a free and loving married life like a man and a woman couple without avoiding the eyes of others.

However, this is just the wishful thinking of Lao Han and me.

At the beginning of our relationship, I made an agreement with Lao Han: We will "close the door as a couple, and get out of bed to kiss brothers".It is impossible for us to snuggle and kiss together on the street just like those fashionable young men and women nowadays.Not to mention calling each other husband or wife.

Such a title would make me and Lao Han sick.

A man is a man, an older brother is an older brother, and a younger brother is a younger brother.Rather than having one of us as charming as a woman, let's find a woman to live with.

Lao Han doesn't like feminine men, and I don't even like them!

The more this is the case, the more I look at Lao Han secretly, the more my heart will fluctuate!His thick short hair that is as neat and strong as a steel brush, his pale complexion, his thick beard, his livid chin, the body hair on his arms and thighs, everything about him makes me ecstatic.Although we all realize that we are out-and-out comrades at this moment, in many cases, I can't believe this is true!I can't help but think: Is a man like Lao Han the brother God sent to me in this life?Will this person be like this, the man who will never leave me and stay with me for the rest of my life?More often than not, I would foolishly think, is this person the one I have been cuddling with in bed?Is this person the village chief who yelled and yelled in front of thousands of people?

Almost every day, I look forward to getting dark soon, and looking forward to hugging my brother into bed sooner!

However, after Haohao's vacation, Lao Han and I have become so yearning and frightening in the hometown of Ruan Ruan and I!Every time, when sneaking into Lao Han's hut in the middle of the night, I became creepy and frightened.

Every noise we accidentally made, every heartfelt gasp and murmur of body and spirit, could not help but make my heart jump!

I'm afraid that the child will suddenly knock on the door outside the house, and I'm even more afraid that he will ask me the next day, where did you go, fourth uncle, in the middle of the night last night?If he said that Uncle Fourth, we don’t have mice in our house, right? Why does the bed in my dad’s room always creak in the middle of the night?

In this way, Lao Han and I secretly spent our unbearable passionate burning moment in the middle of the night.We are all like thieves, and we can no longer be as unscrupulous as before.

Finally, there was one time when we were just being tender, and when I had to go back to my own room, I reluctantly lay on Lao Han's chest and hugged him tightly.

Lao Han touched my face and said distressedly, "What's the matter?"

He didn't ask, but after hearing what he said, my tears couldn't stop streaming down my face.

Tears wet him and rolled down his chest hair into his lower ribs.

"Brother knows that this is wronging you. Xiaohui, why don't you want to do whatever you want with you like before? Didn't you say that? Didn't you say that Haohao is just like your child? You know, our brother's These things are the same as those of other couples. Don’t you have to avoid the child? For so long, seeing the child talking and laughing with you is more enthusiastic than me, his own father, brother this When you are a father, don’t mention how comfortable you feel! My brother is so greedy sometimes! What does this mean? It means that the child doesn’t treat you as an outsider at all! Aren’t you happy? This is a real family! Think about it, the child is still so young! At his age, if he really bumped into him, what would he think? What would he think of us brothers? For a while... "

I covered Lao Han's mouth: "Brother, stop talking, I know all this, it's just me..."

Why don't I know these truths?But why is it so difficult to do it? !Everyone says that the stepmother is bad, but who really knows the difficulties of the stepmother?Who knows how difficult it is for a "stepmother" like me!

"Brother, it's really hard for you! Think about it, he only has a few days off for vacation, and he will go back to school in a short time. Besides, you have to look at many things in two parts."

Lao Han suddenly laughed softly, and the tone was a bit strange: "During the time when the child was at home, isn't it fun for us to love each other secretly? If you change your thinking angle, isn't this feeling very nervous? Exciting?"

Lao Han is really bad sometimes!Hearing this, I thought of the scene where he sneaked into my bed as a prank after avoiding the eyes of the doctors and nurses when I was injured and hospitalized.For an acquainted man in his forties to act like this, what is it if he is not deeply in love and unable to control himself?I also recalled the last time I came back from the hospital, the way he had never done before, a very "perverted" way of "corporal punishment" on me.

Although I don't admit it, I still enjoy Lao Han's "bad" method very much.This kind of "badness" once brought great sexual pleasure to my young heart, and made me even more inseparable from him.

At the same time, I also believe that when Lao Han lived with his deceased wife, he probably never had the joy of a real married life.As a married mature gay man, what kind of emotional and physical torture must he endure in order to live in a married life without love!Thinking of this, I cherish this man who has devoted all his affection to me even more, and I am more eager to use my body to make up for the past that he lost many physical feelings.

After I really changed my mind and thought about what Lao Han said, I laughed after Lao Han wiped my tears away. When the child was talking in his sleep, I went back obediently.

That day, when Meimei came back and saw Lao Han and Hao Hao eating here, she still raised objections.

She first twisted Haohao's ears with a half-annoyed half-smile: "You are so shameless!"

"Why don't I feel ashamed?" Haohao pouted, not to be outdone, his ears are not screw caps.

"You are the fourth uncle, is this a shelter? Are you the fourth uncle's nanny or escort? Don't we have a home?"

For Meimei's objection, Lao Han and I have already thought of countermeasures.

"Meimei, isn't it the Chinese New Year? I just contacted the housekeeping company and said that they will send someone to clean up your house in the past two days. Don't you have to be clean for the New Year? So your dad and Haohao will stay here for a few days to eat. Are you worried about fourth uncle cooking on time, afraid that your father and Haohao will starve, or that fourth uncle will not be able to urge Haohao to study?"

I responded to Meimei with a smile.

"Yeah, I can enjoy the meal made by my fourth uncle. When I go home, my dad comes back so late at night, who will cook for me? Besides, I'm afraid when I'm at home alone."

When Haohao talked about being afraid, Meimei fell silent.

With her mother's departure, no matter how strong the little girl was, she had to face this fact.After all, Haohao is only 13 years old, and there is an empty house at home. Although there are still some tenants, those people go out to work during the day and come back at night, and then they close the door to live their own lives. Who can rest assured that Haohao is at home alone?

When it comes to cooking, I have really worked hard during this time.Not only did I go to the bookstore to buy a few cookbooks, but I also searched the Internet for many kinds of pastries and dishes, and practiced them one by one.I use the rice cooker to make the freshest cakes, various nutritious soups, and fried delicious side dishes. Sometimes, I even put in a lot of effort to cook those gluttonous dishes.Anyway, I have to do my best to satisfy the appetite of Mr. and Mrs. Han.I not only want to tie up their people, but also want to tie up their hearts.Hitching their stomachs is my top priority right now!Seeing Haohao eating so vigorously, Lao Han scolded me and Haohao together: "Xiaohui, you will make him fat like this! Haohao, take it easy, if you take leave, you won't be able to enter the classroom. Don't come looking for Dad!"

While drinking borscht, Hao Hao asked in a puzzled manner, "Why can't I enter the classroom?"

"Two reasons: first, you have become wider and the classroom door is narrower. Second, your teacher and classmates can't recognize you anymore, and think it's a ball that is about to roll into the classroom."

Old Han speaks plausibly.

Haohao and I burst out laughing.

When it comes to delicious food, I want to be a little proud once.Although my old Han is counting toward the age of 50, his weight has never been excessive.Not only is his belly not like those of the potbellied grassroots village officials, but the muscles on his body still maintain good elasticity.Sometimes he himself would describe himself as a "muscle and bone" body type, and say that this kind of person has a good taste, eats well, but does not easily gain weight.I often tease him and say: "If you are over 170 pounds, don't blame me for starving you on purpose. I don't want to sleep with a meat ball at night. I like your current body shape, how sexy!"

Lao Han always said in a half-joking tone: "Brother doesn't know what is sexy or not. He was born with this bone and this body. Since he likes you, he can do whatever he wants. But since he tricked you into The door, raw rice has been made into cooked rice, it will not be so easy to throw brother away."

Now that Haohao can't wait to pester me every day, and Lao Han has no intention of remarrying, and no matter how determined Meimei is to change the current situation, it seems that she has more energy than she wants.

When I met Lao Han, Meimei must have whispered this matter to him, because Lao Han told me later: "Xiaohui, during the Chinese New Year, we have to go back to the old house together. After the New Year, we will come back .”

Hearing Lao Han's tone, I knew there was no room for negotiation.

I am dejected.

It's not that I don't understand Lao Han.I long for Yaxin Garden, my home is Lao Han's real home!I really long to serve him like this, to serve his relatives for the rest of my life!I have no complaints or regrets when I am with him, no matter how much I suffer or suffer!After all, this is a new beginning, especially for my relationship with Lao Han!

However, no matter how unwilling I am, I still have to worry about Lao Han's feelings and put myself in his shoes.Lao Han can live here, and Haohao can also live here during the holidays.However, Meimei has a boyfriend, what will her Xiao Yang say to our "unclear" situation?It's New Year's Eve, and I pay attention to celebrating the New Year at my own home. If Lao Han doesn't go back, the villagers will make irresponsible remarks.Not sure what a gossiper will say.After all, we have to go back to the real society. For the New Year and the festival, for Xi'an, a very traditional city, any folk custom must be followed.For me and Lao Han, Yaxin Garden can only be Wen Meng's paradise!

However, Meimei still happily ate two meals at my house.

This has given me enough face.

Although it is said that there is still a week before the Chinese New Year, the sound of sparse firecrackers still explodes in the air from time to time.

In the winter of Xi'an, the clear blue sky cannot be seen above the city.There was an indescribable indifference in the gray air, which made me unable to think about it.In the past history, how many sincere comrades have looked up to it helplessly.Have they all been in love once?miss?Injuried?Is there a sweet home in the end?Anyway, there is no record left in this city with a long history, so that I can see their later fate through the clues of history, and there is no lesson from the past for reference to further strengthen my love with Lao Han.

However, when I heard the sound of firecrackers, I suddenly felt very homesick.I miss Hua County, where I was born and raised.

I am used to posting happy new year’s eve on the old pagoda tree at the door, to pasting various paper-cuts on the window panes, to the comfort of my father squatting on the big rock at the door to bask in the sun with a long pipe in his mouth, I am used to the heartfelt joy of the second sister-in-law rolling up her sleeves and revealing a section of light-white arm as she thumps on the noodle table. I am also used to the nieces and nephews buying snacks or shopping after receiving the lucky money. The proud image of the cannon falling at your feet while you are not prepared.I am used to making dumplings together with a happy family, I am used to setting off firecrackers in the snow from the [-] o'clock of the new year to the [-]th of the first lunar month, I am used to gathering at the gate of the village committee to beat gongs and drums, I am used to watching the big brothers and uncles sweat profusely. I took off my new padded jacket and yelled in the snow with steaming and red faces. I was used to watching those little girls in Tsing Yi babbling and babbling under the stage of the big theater at the entrance of the village. The crowds bustling on the main road to pay New Year's greetings are used to the concentrated eyes in front of the shadow puppet theater stage, to the talented village people wearing red satin and green silk with exaggerated red faces walking on stilts, and to the skillful performance of lion dance and dragon lantern. I am used to the faint smell of gunpowder smoke in the air accompanied by the cold air entering the nostrils, and the itchy feeling that I want to sneeze but can't...

Thinking of this, my heart is very itchy.

I have to call dad.

On the other end of the phone, Dad shouted, "Junjun, is that you?"

Hearing my father's increasingly old but deep voice, I didn't know what to say other than repeatedly agreeing that I was.

"Aren't you busy recently?"

I really don't know how to answer.I don't know if I'm idle now.Lao Han, Haohao and Meimei, I have to cook for them.However, on the other side, family affection called me to go back to Hua County.After all, the end of the year is approaching!

"Just now, your brother Zuo called and said that you might not come back on New Year's Eve, and told me not to miss you too much, saying that you would take good care of yourself. My baby, I have grown up. Eh, why? Are you talking about someone? Haha"

I don't know why, but Dad suddenly thinks that I'm talking about someone smartly!

However, I didn't have time to share my dad's whimsical happiness, just because Lao Zuo called my dad just now.

Thinking of Lao Zuo, thinking of me going to see him, and seeing his indifference to me because of that Hongxing Erke, my inexplicable jealousy and sense of loss surged in my heart again.

"Did he really say that?" My words turned cold unconsciously.

Lao Zuo wouldn't tell me what happened to Lao Han on the grounds that I fell in love and didn't go home?I couldn't help snorting in my heart: Dead old Zuo!

Before I could speak, I heard footsteps from far to near, and suddenly my second sister-in-law said, "Dad, are you talking to Xiaojun? When you finish speaking, I will also talk to him. I haven't seen you in so long." It's his time."

Dad grunted, and then said to me, "Junjun, are you really talking about someone? Are you also a college student? Is he good-looking? Are you in the same unit? Is it good for you? Look at me, all I think is What? The person my baby is talking about is absolutely impossible to send there,..."

Dad is still immersed in the joy of writing and directing himself. I don't know if I should deny his imagination at this moment.

Reality is an ultimate opposition.On one side is the raging flame of love, and on the other side is the cold lie that I never want to tell.At this moment, facing the old father's ardent expectations again, I stayed there, letting all kinds of feelings ebb and flow in my heart like a tide.

Leaving his old Han's family of three, I want to go back to Hua County for the New Year!

I decided in my heart.