reverse crush

Regarding Zhong Er, Lu Jian also wondered why he refused to give in to Pei Zhenyan, why he had such a serious possessive desire, and why he was so angry because of Pei Zhenyan's affection for her? When he stayed alone with Zhong Er as he wished, but he had no time to devote himself to it, he was always absent-minded and frequently lost his mind, even if he forced himself to concentrate, he would feel uncomfortable all over.

Everything finally explained.

He minded that Zhong Er and Pei Zhenyan were together, not because he was jealous of Pei Zhenyan.

The person he is jealous of is Jong Er.

From the first time he met Zhong Er, he made a mistake in judgment. His nervousness was not because of his heartbeat, but because of Pei Zhenyan's reaction when he saw Zhong Er.

I can't watch this movie at all.

The two of them walked out of the theater and went to Starbucks, Zhong Er paid the bill.

Lu only had a turbulent heart, not to mention playing a gentlemanly demeanor, he didn't even care about where he was, until Zhong Er came back with the Frappuccino and put the cold cup on his face, then he returned God, look around in a daze.

With just a few words that shattered other people's worldview, Zhong Er not only did not show the slightest anxiety of causing trouble, but also faintly showed a trace of gloating: "How is it? Have you figured it out?"

Lu Zhi was in a state of aphasia for a long time, and there was an endless stream of people outside the glass window, talking and laughing.

There is only one movie theater and one Starbucks on the top floor of the shopping mall they are in. Most of the people who can appear here come to watch movies. There is a family who comes out to spend parent-child time, and there are also young couples, you, me, and friends. Laughing and playing, but there is no scene where the two boys are alone.

It should have been a normal situation, but this meeting made him feel terrified.

Zhong Erzi? Gu Zi? Ton Dun drank half a glass of Frappuccino, and finally heard him ask from the opposite side: "How do you see it?"

Is this in disguise? Admit it.

Zhong Er suppressed his playful smile, used a straw to stir the ice cubes in the glass for a while, and said, "Because every time you encounter something funny, the first thing you see is always the proverb."

Just like she subconsciously looks at Lu Zhi.

Lu just frowned, unable to believe that Zhong Er's breakthrough point was so insignificant: "Just because of this?"

"Yes." Zhong Er nodded, "If you don't believe me, you can pay attention to it next time. This trick will never fail."

When a group of people laugh together, people will subconsciously look at the person they care about most.

At that time Zhong Er had not heard of this psychological conclusion.It's just that every time she looked at Lu Zhi with great interest and his gaze was always lingering on other people, and she got bored several times, this matter still caught her attention.

Once the clues are discovered, it is only a matter of time before they follow the clues.

"But the proverb sees me? Oh." Zhong Er showed him a vengeful smile.

Lu Zhi: "..."

Zhong Er said again: "You hurt a young girl's fragile heart, shouldn't you apologize to her seriously?"

Lu just smiled on the surface: "It depends on what you said earlier, it's a dream."

Zhong Er: "..."

That day, Pei Zhenyan still waited for Lu Lu to watch it? He went home after the movie and begged him for peace.

He never expected that from that day on, Lu Zhi never looked for him again.

At first, because of Lu Zhi's subconscious escape, he couldn't face Pei Zhenyan. If he could, he even wanted to avoid himself.

The folk customs in Jincheng are not open. Lu has only lived for 15 years and has never seen homosexuality with his own eyes. This word is like news that can only be seen on TV, like a devastated war, and vicious murderers , Unbelievable and strange things, he knows they exist, but they have nothing to do with his life, so far away that they will always be just news.

Straight men often have an instinctive aversion to homosexuality. As for the specific attitude, it all depends on personal cultivation, but in non-public places or chatting with friends, there will be some disdain and sarcasm.

But he happened to be one of them.

It took Lu only a long time to accept the change of his identity, and his life was muddled.

After going through this difficult time, he began to think about the future of himself and Pei Zhenyan.

There is no doubt that Pei Zhenyan doesn't like boys.

Lu was sad on the one hand, but rejoicing on the other hand.

That road is too difficult to walk. The opposition of the family and the public opinion of the society are not easy to challenge.

People like Pei Zhenyan, who are bright and open, and born with a buff of popularity, should spend their whole lives in the sunshine. In the future, they will marry a wife and have children normally, and get the blessings of everyone. obstruction.

But Lu just had no choice but to stay by Pei Zhenyan's side any longer.

Some things, once noticed, can no longer pretend that they didn't happen.After realizing that I like Pei Zhenyan, this kind of feeling is like a blowout and out of control. It has been suppressed in the subconscious for too long, and once the ban is lifted, it will be unstoppable.Every second of staying by Pei Zhenyan's side, this turbulent and desperate love was boiling.

Rather than being disgusted by Pei Zhenyan after he found out, Lu Zhi would rather be decent and walk away by himself.

Break up friendship, move, change volunteers.

His lively life because of Pei Zhenyan returned to loneliness.

This time, he expels the only light with his own hands, and then closes the door with his own hands.

He knew that Pei Zhenyan would be sad.

He can understand the hope that Pei Zhenyan casts on him time and time again, and he also knows what it means for Pei Zhenyan to give up the recommended admission to Minghui. All gave up.

He always thought that time would heal everything.

Lu only likes it for a while, but he will always forget it. Young love is like the wind, which can come or go indefinitely.

Pei Zhenyan was sad for a while, but it will be okay, after all, he has so many friends.

When he calms down, maybe he can be friends with Pei Zhenyan again.

But two years failed to smooth out his liking.

Every time he met on campus, he had to make a lot of determination to take back his nostalgic eyes.

When he couldn't calm down his longing, he wrote Pei Zhenyan's name on the draft paper, but in the end he could only scribble it so that nothing could be seen? It couldn't be seen.

His favorite is the old rat who crosses the street.

The composition question called "Proverbs in the Book" was the only chance for him to write these two words openly and squarely.

Finally, once, these two words were not his taboo, and they appeared majestically in his pen?.

Two years hadn't exhausted Pei Zhenyan's obsession with him.

"Lu Zhi, you can't do this to me?"

"I? Don't want you to help me? I? Want to be your brother again. I? Want to be like you before? I? Don't want to lose you."

"Because you're more fucking important than all of them combined!"

Pei Zhenyan got drunk that day, and after venting, he fell into a deep sleep, and Lu just stood by and stayed up all night.

Of course, he couldn't push away such Pei Zhenyan. Hearing that sad and angry accusation almost broke his heart. This kind of heartache is not only a mental pain, but a physical pain. Real pain.

But he had to think clearly about what kind of state he should return to Pei Zhenyan's side.He can't be too enthusiastic, otherwise he will be noticed; but he can't be too cold, so that Pei Zhenyan will misunderstand that he is not sincere enough.

If this degree is not well grasped, the consequences will be disastrous.

Their friendship was renewed at the cost of Lu just walking on thin ice, tensing up almost every second, and restraining his desire to get closer.

Pei Zhenyan is as clingy as ever, and even more so than before.Frequent physical contact, refusing to go home after school, sleeping in the same bed at night, and later on, licking faces and traveling together.

Like a scoop of poisoned honey, a swamp full of flowers, a wild dream.

Charming and dangerous.

On the Wupeng boat in Wuzhen, the boatman said that the lanterns would go out soon in this weather, and the wish would not work.

Lu only made a wish: "I? Want Pei Zhenyan to like me too?"

He only dared to make this wish when he knew it would not work, because he couldn't tell whether he wanted it to come true or not.

The lanterns were tenacious beyond expectation, and the flames jumped and swayed in the wind and rain, and never went out.

Before going ashore, Lu only looked back for it.

That wish was too selfish, and he wanted to change it.

I hope that Pei Zhenyan will be safe and happy, and that his life will go smoothly.

But above the ripples in the pond, the lights on both sides of the river were shining brilliantly, and the little lantern had long been lost in it, and there was nowhere to find it.

Things got out of hand that night.

Lu only drank half a glass of wine under Pei Zhenyan's insistence, but when Pei Zhenyan licked his face at night, he failed to heed the clear warning in his heart, and responded as if possessed.

At that time, Pei Zhenyan's face was in the shape of a cross with his, and Pei Zhenyan focused on his side face, and approached his lips, and his kiss stuck to the bridge and tip of Pei Zhenyan's nose, And then? People.

On the one hand, he still knew restraint, he didn't dare to make too much noise, he only dared to touch with his lips vainly.

But he also loses his mind at the same time, because he wants to kiss Pei Zhenyan, and when the drunk Pei Zhenyan walks into the trap step by step, he will capture him, and then go deep into the forbidden area and do whatever he wants.

Maybe it has nothing to do with the wine. Without that half glass of wine, he would still be so crazy and sinking.

He forgot that Pei Zhenyan is a straight man who watched 18-ban three times in one day; he forgot that Pei Zhenyan is a clingy person who used to express his love with intimacy.

Treating him like this is like treating Pei Qian.

Nothing to desire, nothing to love.

Pei Zhenyan woke up startled.

Frightened, he ran away.

What Lu Zhi was most worried about happened, the knife hanging over his head finally fell down?

Pei Zhenyan began to avoid him, hiding at school and at home on the way back from Wuzhen to Jincheng.

This feeling is a hundred times more uncomfortable than being a stranger. He would rather he hadn't gone up to the rooftop to look for Pei Zhenyan on Pei Zheng's wedding day. As long as he didn't go up, Pei Zhenyan wouldn't be able to tell him that he couldn't refuse if.

At least that? In Pei Zhenyan's mind, he still maintains his dignity.

"We? We're still friends, okay?"

These are the most humble words that Lu Zhi has ever said in his life. He let go of his hand once and tasted the pain of lovesickness, and never had the courage to try it a second time.

If Pei Zhenyan said no, he was even ready to move and change schools.

When Pei Zhenyan agreed without hesitation, what Lu only felt the most was not sadness, nor happiness, but self-ashamedness.

It was his selfishness that spoiled the friendship that Pei Zhenyan valued the most. This relationship could never return to its original purity.

From then on, his good friend needs to be on guard against him all the time, endure him, suspect him every moment of sudden ambiguity, and then try hard to whitewash the peace in order to maintain the friendship.

That fig leaf must not be torn off a second time.

"I told him that he was the only one who liked me but wasn't hated by me." Zhong Er made a troubled expression, "How do I answer this?"

Zhong Er has always been a cynical image. At the beginning, Lu Zhi didn't take Zhong Er seriously. It wasn't until she went abroad that he realized that he might have caused her more harm than he imagined. She? Always feels guilty and is willing to try her best to make up for her?

Only Pei Zhenyan, the bottom line, is never allowed to be tempted.

"Zhong Er, don't make fun of me with Pei Zhenyan." His brows and the corners of his mouth were cold, and his voice was full of pressure, "He already knows."

Zhong Er blinked his eyes twice, thinking that he was doubting himself, and quickly separated the relationship: "I didn't say this! I? Swear, I haven't contacted him much in the past two years."

Lu Zhi: "..."

"Oh, you lost the horse yourself." Zhong Er came to his senses, "Scared me a bit."

Chicken with? Duck talk.

After being speechless for a moment, Lu Zhi brought the topic back to the right track: "I? It took a lot of effort to win back the position of friend. So I? Please, stop."

"I? Don't want to lose him."