reverse crush

The process of Lu Zhi becoming Pei Zhenyan's friend is similar to a wild animal being tamed.

That period of the past has long been blurred to Pei Zhenyan. He is too young, and his memory storage function is not yet perfect. He only remembers that at the beginning Lu only didn't like to talk to himself, but after a period of stalking, Lu only's attitude gradually gradually soften.

And Lu Zhi still clearly remembers the whole process.

He was the person Pei Zhenyan identified at first sight, but he didn't know that Pei Zhenyan was also the person he fell in love with at first sight. Eyes may have something to do with appearance, after all, human beings are visual animals.

But it's not all about looks.

There are other things, the beam of sunlight that just hit Pei Zhenyan's face, the stance at the perfect angle, and the world that he just opened a small mouth.

He believed in fate, and that glance was fate.

The meaning is not clear, and there is no false thinking.

Pei Zhenyan always thought that they could become friends because of his stalking, but if it wasn't Pei Zhenyan, it would be useless to stalk another person until he graduated from kindergarten. In other words, it was impossible for Lu Zhi to stalk him? Chance.

Their first acquaintance was never a single pursuit of Pei Zhenyan.

It was the first time that Lu Zhi tried to get out of his closed circle. He longed to touch the light, but was fearful. He was not sure how much patience Pei Zhenyan had for him. He was afraid that he would be thrown back into the abyss of loneliness at any time, and he was also afraid that he would not Can withstand the air outside the closed circle, so every step is cautious.

Pei Zhenyan has endless patience with him; and he himself has unexpected courage.

In this way, he had the first friend in his life.

Pei Zhenyan took him into a brand new world, where the crowds are turbulent, the city is quiet, the sun is shining everywhere, it is brilliant and gorgeous, and there are joys, anger, sorrows and joys that don't have to be suppressed.

After that, the kindergarten teacher excitedly shared the good news with Lu Ningshuang every now and then, telling her about Lu Zhi's new progress in the kindergarten.

Lu Ningshuang's serious trouble was resolved, and she almost wanted to regard Pei Zhenyan as her lifesaver.

This is also the reason why she took care of Pei Zhenyan all the time.

Thanks to Pei's proverbs, Lu Zhi is no longer a lonely Lu Zhi, he has become a boy with no major personality problems, but a little dull.

The friendship between Lu Zhi and Pei Zhenyan has lasted longer than expected, and the degree is deeper than expected. As Pei Zhenyan entered the first grade of primary school early, the social distance between the two has been taken a big step closer. So far Started eight and a half years of "Meng Bu" Defocus, Defocused Meng.

Like most of the best buddies of the boys, they agree to get along with each other when they disagree, and make up easily after the quarrel; they join hands to cause trouble and support each other.

Slowly, they entered adolescence successively, growing from children to teenagers.

The rebellious period came as scheduled, and we did a lot of stupid things together, we discovered our curiosity about sex together, we encouraged them to see beautiful women together, and we also watched AV together in the room.

They made a reservation to be each other's best man in the future, and they agreed that they would live close to each other when they were seventy or eighty years old. Can they run? After getting a girlfriend, they still put their brothers first. At that time, they really thought so. After all, a girlfriend is just a fantasy. It’s too abstract, and the other party has been with me for many years. What is more important? Don't think about it.

Without Zhong Er, this kind of friendship would probably last for a long time.

Lu only remembered the scene when the two of them met Zhong Er for the first time.

When they came out of the cafeteria, a girl walked about ten meters in front of them.

She has a charming back with a curious front face.

Pei Zhenyan nodded his chin in that direction, motioning for Lu to watch, and expressed great expectations.

Lu Zhi also thought it was quite eye-catching: "What if it's a back killer."

"The old rules." Pei Zhenyan left him and walked forward after speaking.

The old rule is that when seeing the back of a suspected beautiful woman, one of them will overtake her, and the other will call her name behind her back, so that she can turn around naturally and look at the girl's front by the way.

Seeing that Pei Zhenyan surpassed the girls, Lu only called him by name: "Pei Zhenyan."

Hearing the sound, Pei Zhenyan turned his head, his eyes pretending to be casually scanning the girl's face.

Based on Lu's knowledge of his best friend, he can tell that the girl is probably more aesthetically pleasing than Pei Zhenyan at a glance, so he asked with a smirk in the next sentence: "How is it, does it look good?"

This unexpected trick confused Pei Zhenyan. Everyone around looked at him, including the girl. Pei Zhenyan usually has no face and skin and can't stand this embarrassment in front of strangers. He has a fair face. Flushed up, he gritted his teeth and cursed: "Fuck Lu Quan - your uncle."

After reading Pei Zhenyan, the girl went to look at Lu Zhi again. She didn't show any shy expression, her eyes were frank and open, and there was even a little teasing.

The moment he saw the girl's face clearly, Lu Zhi was also a little stunned. After living for so many years, it was the first time he saw someone whose appearance could rival Pei Zhenyan in the real world.

From here, the fate began to change suddenly, gradually developing in the direction of getting out of control, but Lu Zhi knew nothing about it at the time.

Something in his heart burst suddenly, like frosted glass, he didn't know that it was jealousy, sting, possessiveness.

Since then, the name Zhong Er frequently appeared in Pei Zhenyan's mouth, and their fixed duo began to become a trio.

Lu Zhi never thought of falling in love with the same girl? Goofy drama would happen between him and Pei Zhenyan. He also had a period of time when he didn't know that he was angry? Generally found?.

Knowing Pei Zhenyan for so many years, he has always been in the position of accommodating, because his world is too small, and Pei Zhenyan occupies all of his friendship by himself, so he bows his head first when there is a quarrel. Whatever Pei Zhenyan likes, he will give it up. If there is disagreement? When Pei Zhenyan is stubborn for a while, he will compromise.

In the beginning? At the beginning, Lu just didn't want to argue with Pei Zhenyan. He tried to suppress his true thoughts and help his best friend.

But love is not the last bottle of iced Coke left in the freezer in the canteen, nor is it? It’s not just a pair of limited-edition sneakers.

Love is incomparable? Things, selfish and exclusive.

He couldn't bear Zhong Er and Pei Zhenyan getting so close, all the teasing and intimacy between them was very glaring in his eyes.

He hates threesomes and longs to be alone with Zhong Er.

His contradictions became more and more difficult to hide, and Pei Zhenyan soon felt the rift between them.

Lu just didn't say it clearly, and neither did Pei Zhenyan, because they were all afraid that once they spread it out, they would no longer be able to whitewash the peace.

No one said it, but no one stepped back either.

Ever had a girlfriend who also put each other first? Oath, it seems ridiculous.Love is the most ardent and turbulent emotion in the world. Some people pay their lives for it, some don't want dignity, and some give up the moral bottom line.

Especially for the first time liking, it is not easy to control.

None of them thought that in the face of love, the friendship of more than ten years would not be vulnerable.

The only explanation for this game is that Zhong Er doesn't like any of them.

But Zhong Er is only interested in Lu.

Boys and girls who have a crush on each other are like the two poles of a magnet, quickly meeting the magnetic field.

Not only did Lu no longer care about brotherhood, he began to follow his inner yearning, and got closer and closer to Zhong Er.

He has given in to Pei Zhenyan for so many years, but once he refuses to let him go, Pei Zhenyan will hate him.

One day I couldn't bear to ask him: "I liked Zhong Er first? I said I wanted to chase after him first. We have been brothers for so many years, and you poach my corner?"

Lu Zhi was also very angry, and asked back: "You figure out what your relationship is, how can I poach your corner?"

After knowing each other for so many years, he almost never said harsh words to Pei Zhenyan.

But at this moment, he couldn't restrain the malice in his heart.

After he finished speaking, he regretted it, even felt sad. This is the person he held in his hand for ten years, and he is also the person he relies on the most. A friend who was exchanged after a brave attempt.

Xiao Lu, who only dared to secretly hope that Pei Zhenyan would come to play with him back then, had only thought that one day he would waste this relationship like this.

What was said? The words were splashed, and the two sides fell into silence.

Pei Zhenyan's eyes were full of disappointment.

Lu Zhi was suddenly so terrified that he couldn't care about anything at that moment? Come on, a compromising "I quit" rushed to his throat and was about to say it.

But Pei Zhenyan didn't give him a chance, so he turned around and left.

After calming down, Lu Zhi put away his impulse to sacrifice love for friendship?

He bowed his head first in this quarrel, and Pei Zhenyan took the olive branch.But at this point, their threesome was completely shattered. Sometimes Zhong Er played with him alone, and sometimes with Pei Zhenyan alone, but there were very few solo actions between the two of them.

Isn't Zhong Er the kind of person who will change for others, even though the relationship with Lu Zhi is already very ambiguous, even though Lu Zhi has expressed it very bluntly? She likes her staying with Pei Zhenyan, but she likes Pei very much Proverbs, this kind of liking has nothing to do with the relationship between men and women, but the liking between friends, so these two people still often play together.

After winning this battle, Lu just didn't feel happy at all. Pei Zhenyan's existence seriously interfered with his leisurely enjoyment of romance.

The drifting away from Pei Zhenyan made him feel very painful, and he often had selfless thoughts of trading love for friendship.

But when he saw Pei Zhenyan talking and laughing with Zhong Er, he was so jealous that he wanted to remove Pei Zhenyan from Zhong Er's life completely.

Their junior high school only gives half a day off every week in the second semester of the third grade, and this half day is the only chance to go outside to relax.

That day Lu only cut off Pei Zhenyan and Zhong Er's itinerary to watch a movie, and abducted Zhong Er alone.

Watching? Literary and romantic films, very sensational? Movies.

Lu just from the beginning to the end? Remember what was shown in that movie, his mind is full of Pei Zhenyan, doesn’t he? He keeps thinking about whether he has gone too far. angry.

In any case, he never thought of losing Pei Zhenyan.

I don't? Let him watch a movie with Zhong Er? Is that enough? Why should I come instead of him? How should I coax him when I get home? Can I still coax him well?Thinking so, Lu just stretched out his hand to get a drink, and accidentally touched Zhong Er's hand.

Almost subconsciously, he flicked his hand away like an electric shock.

Zhong Er turned to look at him, the light and shadow changes of the movie reflected on her face, flickering on and off, outlining a teasing but helpless smile at the corner of her mouth.

At such a young age, touching hands in a theater is an earth-shattering event, Lu just suppressed the panic in his heart and asked, "What are you laughing at?"

"Don't you? Shouldn't you hold my hand?" Zhong Er asked back.

Yes, two love each other, in a dark movie theater, the music is sensational, the light is ambiguous, the atmosphere is completely in place, there is no reason not to go further.

But even if Zhong Er wakes up, Lu Zhi still has no desire to get close to her. Now his mind is full of Pei Zhenyan, and he has no time to think about why, so he just replied perfunctorily: "It's not together again, it's not good."

"Then when are you going to confess to me?" Zhong Er asked mercilessly, "If you confess, we might be together."

She's already said so much, really? It's only a matter of one touch, and everything will fall into place.

But Lu just couldn't say it, and he wasn't even half tempted by these words.

He couldn't find the answer from an emotional point of view, so he could only use rational thinking to find a reason for himself: "Don't you? Are you saying that you are unrequited love? You hate whoever likes you. If I confess to you, you will hate me. "

Zhong Er smiled: "No, I will."

Lu just frowned.

Since she said no, he should do so.

But he is not in the mood and patience to make her happy now.

"Because you don't like me." Zhong Er finally said the words that she had repeatedly doubted and verified. The stone that was hanging in her heart suddenly fell to the ground, and she was relieved? At the same time, she felt deeply tired.

From an early age, she discovered her own problem, whenever she developed a crush on a boy, but as soon as they returned the favor to her, she would lose interest in him.

Without exception.

Although if Lu Zhi only likes her, there is a high probability that this ending cannot be avoided, but she is now having a good impression of Lu Zhi only, and if she can't get it, it will always be frustrating and sad.

"what?"

Lu could only tell that this was not an irony that the girl said she wanted boys to coax, but a statement that represented certainty.

"I said, don't you? Like me." Zhong Er looked at him sideways, and calmly repeated.

"How..." Lu just wanted to say how it was possible.

If not? Like, why did he see her? The first time, he had a strange feeling in his heart.

If you don't like it, why would you be so jealous because of her relationship with Pei Zhenyan?

If you don't like it, how can you take the risk of breaking your friendship and fight for her.

If not? Like, how to explain his behavior for so long.

The only? The answer can only be like.

All of a sudden, some ungraspable thought flashed through his mind, cutting off his words.

He doesn't know what it is, but he perceives its seriousness, which is enough to subvert his previous 15 years of self-cognition and worldview.

Just that flash of light made his mind tremble and his soul restless.

Seeking advantages and avoiding disadvantages? Instinctively, he didn't want to delve into it.

Just let it disappear into the ocean of his thoughts, never to be found again.

"Don't you? Like me." Zhong Er repeated this sentence for the third time tonight. She was fed up with keeping a huge secret that even the person concerned hadn't realized. ——She knew that Lu not only did it on purpose, but he did cause her emotional harm, so she ignored his resistance and captured this ray of consciousness for him. Throw it in front of him.

Cruel and compassionate:

"Why don't you understand, the person you like is not? It's me."