I see myself

The window was lowered, and the sea breeze calmed Fang Zhan a little. A large truck drove past, and the light shone on him. He slammed on the brakes and stopped on the side of the road.

He felt that sooner or later he would be driven crazy by Jiang Yansheng.

When I was angry, I wanted to leave him alone and walk away, but when I came back to my senses, I could find thousands of reasons for him immediately.

Not to mention Ruan Luo, he has never been so patient with himself in his life.

There are dark green iron railings next to the road, and there are fishing boats fastened with iron chains parked on the seashore below. When the waves come up, they will sway with them, and when the tide recedes, they will sway slowly.

His temples were so painful from the blow, he closed the car window and called Qiao Yuanjiu.

The other side seemed not expecting him to call, or was frightened by the quarrel just now, and waited for him to speak first after answering.

There was a wry smile in Fang Zhan's voice,

"Brother Qiao, I want to ask you for a favor."

Qiao Yuanjiu was a little surprised, he pondered for a moment,

"I think...Jiang Yansheng shouldn't take revenge on you."

Fang Zhan was silent for a few seconds before he finished his sentence.

"He is not in good condition now. I am worried about his safety and would like to ask you to help take care of him."

Of course it’s not good to be in a good state after a quarrel, but if you dump someone, do you have to look back and worry about their depression after the quarrel?

With Fang Zhan's attitude just now, he thought the two of them were going to break up completely.

Although he was curious, he didn't really want to get involved in this matter. Just as he was about to decline, he listened to the other side to make up a condition.

"I know that you don't like what I have, but I heard that you have a girlfriend who just graduated, who studies design, and the manuscript was stolen recently. If you don't mind, I can ask a friend to take her Dig away and settle the matter by the way, neither the Qiao family nor her will find out."

Thanks to the memory of his previous life, he still remembers that Qiao Yuanjiu had a down-and-out girlfriend who was not recognized by the Qiao family, and she still pretended to be poor and dated with her. In the end, the incident became a turmoil and became gossip in the circle for a long time, even if he He and Qiao Yuanjiu are no more than nodding acquaintances, and have heard about it.

Qiao Yuanjiu laughed, with a bit of unkindness,

"It's a pity that Mr. Fang doesn't sell gossip full-time."

Fang Zhan accepted the sarcasm, smiled and belittled himself,

"I'm just a businessman at heart. Before discussing cooperation with people, I always need to know what the other party needs most. Brother Qiao, I owe you a favor this time."

"You're worried about him, you can just come back by yourself, why ask me?"

Fang Zhan sighed,

"I'm going back now, but I can't solve the problem. Some things don't just need to be communicated."

When he saw Jiang Yansheng here for the first time, he was angry at him for deceiving himself. He heard him say that Qiao Rui guessed the reason, and he was angry at him for not believing himself, but he didn't hold back his move, but it was because Jiang Yansheng used words like "like" and "love" To despise feelings, he opened his mouth and kept silent that he loves him, knowing that he is good to him but still choosing to doubt, and relying on favor and arrogance to ask for forgiveness when he is angry.

As if knowing that he will be soft-hearted and tolerant, and have nothing to fear.

But when he calms down, his reason returns to his head, and he will ask, is this really the case?

Jiang Yansheng was careful everywhere, the only two times he said he liked him, once was when Chris said he was fighting with someone in Germany, and the other time was tonight.

His self-confidence and joy are nothing but mania that erupted upwards after long-term suppression, to cover up the uneasiness in his heart that he has forgotten.

He couldn't control himself, he was like a madman.

After listening to his answer, Qiao Yuanjiu didn't know what to think, but she still refused, but her tone was a little relieved.

"I think you may be overestimating me."

Fang Zhan immediately connected,

"I don't ask much, I just want you to send him back to Jiang's house."

After he finished speaking, he covered his forehead, feeling that he was really troublesome this time,

"He might...don't let him drive. If you stop him, he might fight with you, but isn't there a special police next to him? Let them take him away by force and send him to Jiang's house. Mr. Jiang will take care of him. "

Qiao Yuanjiu was silent for a while, then glanced at the opened wooden house next to her,

"Just send it back to Jiang's house?"

"Just send it back to Jiang's house."

Fang Zhan repeated in a solemn tone, and thanked again.

The phone was hung up, and he still didn't want to move, but he was afraid that the people behind would catch up and meet him, so he drove forward, turned into a sandy path, got out of the car again, and returned to the seaside.

This road was the place where the car accident occurred in the previous life, and it was also the place where he never thought of returning.

After he committed suicide, he repeated the emotions and experiences at the moment of suicide thousands of times. A judge sentenced him to commit murder, but he also saved two lives. After the punishment, he asked him if he would atone for the crime of killing. He said He felt relieved when he died, and the repetition was only the ultimate pain, and he didn't mind another round of punishment.

He was thrown into the darkness again, standing at the intersection of time and space, looking at his past experience, seeing that every choice, whether right or wrong, would lead to thousands of differences in subsequent lives.

But he said those were not himself, it was just someone else's life.

In the end, he saw that he was abused when he was a child, shivering on the wet wooden board with injuries all over his body, his eyes were dark and bright, with only drops of water hanging on them, and he was still calling his mother when he was unconscious from the fever. his head.

He regretted it, he had an obsession in his heart, he wanted him to live well, walk under the sun, on a smooth road, at least, at least, when he committed suicide, someone could hold the key of his house, walk in, and stop him.

The fishing boat swayed slightly, he stepped on the plank, lay down again, and looked up at the starry sky.

Suddenly feel lonely.

The phone buzzed and vibrated in his pocket. He still lazily relaxed his nerves and thought about it miscellaneously. After a while, he let out a breath slowly, got up and took out the phone, and looked at Qiao Yuan Jiufa without any surprises. When the information comes, the feeling of loneliness fades away like the tide of the sea in the shaking of the fishing boat.

He had to admit that he saved Jiang Yansheng, he saved himself, and he saved himself.

But you can't be soft-hearted.

Returning home from the beach, Jiang Yansheng's phone was blocked by him, leaving only WeChat to send messages. He clicked on the dialog box, browsed one by one, and then blocked WeChat as well.

When I got up the next day and opened the door, there was a familiar figure squatting beside the elevator.

Fang Zhan glanced at him, and opened his mouth when he stopped him,

"Are you here to apologize to me?"

Jiang Yansheng clenched his hands behind his back, looked at him nervously, nodded, then lowered his head,

"I said something wrong, I know you don't like me, and you should dislike me even more now, but..."

Fang Zhan put on the earphones,

"Sorry, I don't have time to listen to you."

Seeing that he was talking with someone, Jiang Yansheng closed his mouth again, got off the elevator and stood outside the car waiting for him to turn around. Fang Zhan glanced at him, closed the car door and left.

The earphones were taken off, the phone was empty and there was no call for a new day.

When he got to the company, the little tail still followed behind him, but kept a distance. Xiao Xiao came to work and met the two silent people. When he saw Jiang Yansheng, he was not angry at all.

"Hey, isn't this Young Master Jiang? You shouldn't be studying in the United States now. Why, are you on vacation?"

With one sentence, he whipped his corpse again, Jiang Yansheng's expression changed slightly, he looked at Xiao Xiao, and replied with a half-smile,

"Whether I have a holiday or not is none of your business."

"Hey, it's none of my business whether you take the holiday or not, but you..."

"Have you contacted Tang Sheng since you left home?"

Fang Zhan's voice interrupted Xiao Xiao.

Xiao Xiao was successfully attracted attention,

"What Tang Sheng? He hasn't left yet?"

When the elevator arrived, Fang Zhan took back the conversation,

"In the company, we talk about work. If you are curious, you can ask after get off work."

He walked out first, Jiang Yansheng followed behind him, and was separated from the office by the door, Xiao Xiao glanced at him, and also found that the two seemed to be arguing, so he didn't want to tell Fang Zhan's plan again, lest he get complacent .

The company has nothing important to do recently, and they held a meeting at noon to discuss whether to transfer shares now or wait for the company to enter the IPO before withdrawing from a meeting at noon. Fang Zhan did not give any opinion, and left it to Xiao Xiao to decide.

A manager noticed something was wrong and asked Wang Yan for information, but Wang Yan was also a little confused.

Apart from the cold war between the boss and the young master recently, there seems to be no other major issues?

From morning to night, this was repeated for a few days, and the daily apology changed from saying something wrong to not lying to him, not believing him, and then turning into a guarantee that he would tell the truth in the future, Fang Zhan mostly ignored it, I ignored him, but the attitude of rejecting him became more and more obvious, and even the company refused to let him in.

"Mr. Jiang asked me to take care of you for a month before, but now a month has passed. Jiang Shao is not an employee of Kainuo, so there is no reason to come here again."

When Jiang Yansheng heard the word Jiang Shao, he felt that something was wrong. He stood in the company garage, trying to get his wits about him.

"I can go to work with pay!"

Fang Zhan paused,

"I'll forget it if you don't mention it. Since we are separated, you should return my card to me."

While talking, he pulled out Jiang Qi's supplementary card and put it in front of the young master.

Jiang Yansheng was visibly thinner, suppressing the trembling in his voice to make himself look tougher,

"I never agreed to part with you. What you gave me is mine, and I can't take it back."

Fang Zhan stretched out the card and didn't take it back. Seeing that he didn't pick it up, he simply put it on the hood of the car beside him.

"You can stay if you want, but I don't want to keep your things. I will return this card to you."

He turned around to leave, but was held back by Jiang Yansheng who was about to collapse, the young master's voice seemed to be squeezed out bit by bit from his throat,

"Fang Zhan, you still owe me a request."

Fang Zhan frowned, and then saw him calmly said:

"You promised me that if things in Yancheng were on the right track a few years ago, you would promise me one request."

Fang Zhan remembered, he didn't break away from Jiang Yansheng's hand, turned around and sighed,

"Don't say you want me to forgive you."

Jiang Yansheng stared at him for a moment, but let go and laughed,

"You obviously know that I can't live without you, so you bully me."

"If I say yes, what will happen if I want you to forgive me? Do you want to say that I forgive you, but the breakup is because I have no feelings? Then what if I say no? Do you want to agree again, and then after a few days God will bring it up again?"

Jiang Yansheng didn't want to threaten Fang Zhan with this request at all, he wanted to give Fang Zhan and himself a step up, to see if Fang Zhan was willing to accept it, but Fang Zhan's attitude had already given the answer, and the request was gone significance.

He no longer insists, he also has self-esteem, even if he is stepped on the ground, he can still pick it up as if nothing happened, after all, this is not the first time.

Seeing him turn and leave, Fang Zhan called his name.

Jiang Yansheng paused slightly, without turning his head.

Fang Zhan asked,

"Why do not you believe me?"

Jiang Yansheng clenched the hand holding the car keys, then turned back and smiled at him,

"Fang Zhan, do you want to keep the last decency from me?"

His smile gradually stopped, and he was as calm as discussing food and drink,

"How do you make me believe that I don't like myself, how can I believe that you like me?"

The garage was empty, and the darkness behind him seemed to merge with him, separating him from the sensory light here.

Fang Zhan walked towards him, and then stopped beside the co-pilot of his Pagani,

"Get in the car, don't you want to drive me?"

Jiang Yansheng was stunned for a moment, but there was no surprise on his face. He opened the car door, then drove slowly onto the road at a speed that could be called steady, and asked calmly,

"Where do you... want to go?"

Fang Zhan glanced at him,

"go home."

Jiang Yansheng stopped talking again. He drove the people to the destination. When Fang Zhan got off the car, he was about to leave, but Fang Zhan closed the door, knocked on the glass, and told him to get off too.

He suddenly remembered that he had moved most of his things home...Fang Zhan's home, in fact, there is nothing he can't let go of, everything can be bought again, the most precious...He thought that after he went to the United States, he opened the The suitcase, took out the cup, and saw the jewel-like cuff on the bottom of the cup.

Not the one he hid, but a couple with that one.

Every time he thinks that he hides the feelings that are about to overflow, he is not so perverted, but he will find that he has been seen by another person and responds.

Thinking of this, he began to feel out of breath again.

However, when he came back to his senses, he found that his body had followed Fang Zhan out of the car and stopped in front of the house.

Forget it, even if you don't want those rags, it's good to come in one last time as a farewell.

Gray-blue walls, metal-colored lamps, when he first came here, he felt that the place was too indifferent like its owner. After he moved in, he asked his aunt to place many potted plants on the windowsill and in the corner of the wall.

The green dill has already climbed crazily and reached the top of the wall, and was moved to the side of the light strip, wrapped around it, and became a decoration together.

Fang Zhan poured him a glass of water, and he looked up again, and found that the tea bags that he had not divided had been tied and sealed with string, neatly placed on the locker in stained glass, in the sunlight The light is shining at the bottom, standing in front of the cabinet, the height can be reached with one hand.

He was wrong, in fact there was nothing broken, they were all things he wanted to take away but couldn't let go of.

Seeing him staring blankly at the top, Fang Zhan followed his line of sight,

"Do you want to drink this?"

Then, without waiting for him to answer in a daze, he reached out for a pack, connected it with hot water, and poured another cup.

He rubbed his face, trying to soften his tone, to make his words sound more convincing,

"I didn't say I disagree with your request, but reconciliation is okay. You must obey me in everything in the future, and you can't hide it from me. Can you do it?"

Jiang Yansheng reached out to touch the wall of the water glass, and his hand was scalded. He recovered, but still didn't speak.

Fang Zhan: ...wouldn't be frightened by myself.

He paused for a moment, but still didn't get a response, so he stopped waiting for the young master to take that step first, and didn't have the appetite to tease Jiang Yansheng, so he tapped a few times on his phone, and then placed it in front of Jiang Yansheng, Speak slowly and clearly word by word,

"You don't believe me, I understand, but you can't wait until I leave everything behind to circle you and still don't believe me, this is a ticket to the United States, this time I will go with you and live there with you, but..."

He paused, looked at Jiang Yansheng's calm expression, and said his ultimate goal,

"But you have to go to the hospital with me."

Seeing that he didn't have any repulsive overreactions after speaking, he started pouring chicken soup again, which is bound to make this person want to open up,

"I won't ask you to live there. I just ask the doctor regularly and take medicine on time. You can't take it as a big deal, just treat it as a cold and fever. It's just a long-term cold and fever, but no matter how long it takes, It will have a good day, but it is just a small unsatisfactory period in your long life. Maybe you will think about it in the future and want to boast that you are great. You have suffered from the disease that many geniuses have and cured it. Others are envious."

Jiang Yansheng listened quietly, showing no expression.

Fang Zhan thought for a while, and then digitized the long life to make it sound more powerful.

"Look, you are only 25 years old now. If you and I can live to be more than 70 years old, there are still at least 45 years left. If you spend another 25 years on medical treatment, you will still have 20 years left to be with me." Isn't it great to live happily together? Don't tell me you want to be with me, even for these 25 years, you don't want to try, you don't want to spend your whole life with me? "

Jiang Yansheng seemed to be touched at last, and asked with a strange expression,

"You want to stay with me until you're 70?"

He felt that his mood was quite stable these two days, and the temperature in the water glass told him that it was true, but why did he feel that he couldn't understand Fang Zhan's words? It felt like I was dreaming.

Fang Zhan also poured himself a glass of water, and asked in a calm tone,

"So, can you promise?"

Jiang Yansheng held the cup wall even harder, lowered his head to try the water from the tea bag for the first time, and then his expression suddenly seemed to be pressed by some kind of vivid switch, and he said in a daze, half sad and happy :

"This tea...it seems...it seems to be quite delicious."

"..."

It's delicious, and I didn't lie to you.

But what does this have to do with my question?

Fang Zhan felt that he had said the longest thing he had ever said in his life, but he didn't get the expected reaction from the other party, so he couldn't help being a little frustrated.

He began to doubt whether his method was effective, and then put away his gentle expression, and looked at the opposite person sternly,

"you..."

As soon as he uttered a word, the person opposite started to cry silently again.

It's just that he didn't seem to realize it himself, and he was still at a loss.

Fang Zhan's patience was about to run out, and when he was about to say that it was useless to cry, he saw that Jiang Yansheng didn't wait for him to comfort him, so he quickly wiped his eyes, probably because he didn't want me to see his expression and lowered his head,

"Why...why didn't you tell me earlier?"

Fang Zhan paused, why didn't he say it earlier?

The young master raised his head, and there was nothing unusual on his face, as if the tears just now were just his own illusion.

But I don't know if it's because of being moisturized, there is a child-like pure light in the eyes,

"I obviously asked your name, why didn't you tell me at that time?"

Fang Zhan finally understood, what he was talking about was when he was a child.

But what did he say, could it be that he is also called Jiang Yansheng?

Fang Zhan wanted to ask again, but the young master rushed over unexpectedly, with an innocent expression, but fierce and forceful movements, while licking and biting his lips, he raised his head like a homeless man who had been dropped by his master and brought back home Looking at him like a dog.

Fang Zhan raised his rejecting hand, and then slowly put it down.

Forget it... let's talk after the kiss.

Xiao Xiao is right, he just eats and sells miserably.

The author has something to say: I wrote a long essay, but if I don’t post it, today will be over, and I will delete it again_(:з)∠)_