Window 2, Seventh Canteen

Under the street lights, the breath turns into fog.

There was music playing on Han Zilu's cell phone, the volume was turned up loud, and the earphones leaked some sound.

Even passers-by could tell that it was a very cheerful song with a jumping melody.

This song started playing when he left the hotel, and the single was repeated all the way. When Han Zilu returned home, he had repeated it countless times.

Even after taking off the earphones, the melody still echoed in his mind——

byebyelove

ss

ss

ithinki'acry

byebyelove

caresses

ss

ulddie

dye

……

This is a song that Han Zilu likes very much. It is cheerful and joyful. It sounds like going on a picnic tomorrow, like having a picnic in autumn when the sky is high and the clouds are clear.

However, this is a song about broken love, and the lyrics sing "byebyelove" over and over again.

When Han Zilu first heard this song, he only thought it was cheerful and had no special impression. After paying close attention to the lyrics, he began to like it.

Such a happy breakup song makes people feel that falling out of love is not a big deal when listening to it. They feel that even if they say goodbye to their lover, they can still bounce back home and continue to live a heartless life.

However, this cheerful breakup song did not make Han Zilu's breakup happy.

Yes, break up.

This is the Chinese word that appears most frequently in his mind at this time.

The conversation with Jiang Wei was not a confession to him, but a breakup, a breakup.

Although they never started.

But for Han Zilu, this was originally a one-sided relationship, wishful thinking.

Therefore, when he decided to break the boat, it became a unilateral breakup.

What would Jiang Wei think?

Will it feel disgusting?Or don't think about anything at all, forget about it in a few days, and go on with his life——

Go home during the holidays, reunite with your family, celebrate the New Year, and then start school, go back to your classmates, and enjoy the wonderful college life.

Han Zilu guessed that Jiang Wei's life should be like this. After all, he has never experienced these things and can only rely on his imagination.

But even if he had no imagination, he knew that to Jiang Wei, he was just someone he had known for less than two months.

Half a stranger, barely a friend.

Losing such a person is probably not something worth caring about.

Especially when he learns that this person is plotting against him...

However, Han Zilu still had a glimmer of hope, hoping that Jiang Wei would respond to his words. Of course, he didn't expect his feelings to be responded to, but at least he hoped that the other party would take his feelings seriously.

Even with resentment, it's better than silence.

Han Zilu couldn't help repeating the scene of meeting Jiang Wei in his mind, repeating what he said at that time, and Jiang Wei's reaction.

But he couldn't remember.

Maybe it's not that he can't remember clearly, but that Jiang Wei didn't give him any response at all.

He remembered that Jiang Wei had a cold expression at that time, as if he had known what he was going to say, had seen through his feelings, and was just waiting for him to take the initiative to tell the truth and end everything.

Han Zilu even hoped that Jiang Wei would show more disgust, or even anger.

That at least shows that he cares about him, even if only as a friend.

But Jiang Wei didn't.

Han Zilu felt very frustrated. The more he replayed the scene in his mind, the more he felt that his confession was a joke.

That kind of feeling is like, what you regard as a treasure is worthless in the eyes of others, but you still take this thing to offer treasure like an idiot, and you don't even know that it is a piece of shit in the eyes of the other party.

This kind of thinking carries a deep negative emotion, which makes Han Zilu want to sever all ties with this world.

At least all the connections with Jiang Wei.

The singing trembled suddenly, and then the phone died.

Han Zilu squatted on the balcony, suddenly felt that the world was terribly silent, the phone screen was dark, just like the scenery under the balcony, it was dead silent.

For a purpose that he couldn't explain, he pressed the button of the phone. Of course, the phone was out of battery, so there would be no response.

But he still pressed it, maybe this simple and repetitive action can relieve the depression in his heart.

Pressing and pressing, the pinyin spelled Jiang Wei's name.

It was a coincidence, but Han Zilu turned him into a necessity.

He pulled the charger, charged the phone, and then created a new message, spelling out Jiang Wei's name.

When the first "Jiang Wei" jumped out, his heart twitched suddenly, and then the second, third, this twitching feeling gradually faded away.

At this point, typing this name no longer made him feel strange.

This is a good beginning.

Han Zilu stopped typing and opened his inbox, but there was no new text message.

Click on the call history, there is no new call.

Jiang Wei did not contact him again.

Maybe never again.

Han Zilu lit a cigarette, put it in his mouth, searched through the call records one by one, deleted Jiang Wei's name, then opened the inbox again, and deleted the same name.

After deleting, one cigarette has ended.

He exhaled the last puff of cigarette and looked downstairs. The feeling of dead silence just now was gone, but the occasional sounds of pedestrians passing by made him feel more empty in his heart.

Although he has a body temperature of 37 degrees, his chest seems to be colder than the low temperature of minus ten degrees in winter night.

Another cigarette was lit, and Han Zilu greedily inhaled the smoke.

He knew that his state was very bad. This state was caused by Jiang Wei, but not entirely because of Jiang Wei.

Every time a relationship fails, more negative emotions accumulate in his heart.

Let him be more convinced that he will never find a suitable person.

The days seem to go on like this, everyone else can find their destination and walk together on the long road of life, only he is still alone.

After a long time, Han Zilu dragged his empty shell back to the bedroom and lay down with all his clothes on.

He tried, but couldn't fall asleep at all.

So he took out his mobile phone again, looked through the address book, call records, and text message records, trying to find Jiang Wei's name, but he had already deleted those two words without leaving any traces.

Yeah, it's over.

Everything about this person in the future has nothing to do with him.

However, Han Zilu still couldn't convince himself to give up completely.

He stared at the inbox icon and kept his eyes open all night.

Outside the window, the night dragged away with heavy steps, and the light reappeared in the sky.

Han Zilu looked away from the phone, his bloodshot eyes looked out the window.

People who have stayed up all night have this experience. After a whole night without sleep, there will be an illusion, as if the previous day has never ended, and today has become today.

Two days were spelled into one day, and the length became 48 hours.

Han Zilu covered his eyes and laughed out loud.

After such a long period of suffering, his unlucky lovelorn day is not over yet.

After laughing, he slammed his phone against the wall, smashing the screen, covered his head, and slept for a whole day and night.

When he woke up again, it was another early morning. He walked to the balcony and looked downstairs. The shop had already opened earlier, and there were many elderly people queuing up to buy soybean milk and fried dough sticks.

Han Zilu took a shower, dried his hair, and shaved his beard.

Then find out the favorite clothes from the closet, iron them carefully, dress neatly, spray on a long-used cologne, and go to work.

In the cafeteria, several young cooks started whispering when they saw him coming.

Master Wang was busy. When he saw him coming, he greeted him with a smile and asked, "Why didn't Xiaohan come yesterday? The manager asked you several times. Are you sick? It doesn't matter to see a doctor, but you have to ask for leave."

Han Zilu nodded at him, "I'm sorry, it's my fault. I'll explain to the manager when he comes."

Master Wang patted him on the shoulder, "It's okay, ah, say something nice to him, it's okay."

Han Zilu smiled back, changed into his overalls, and started working.

The manager never showed up early in the cafeteria, he arrived at the office at the usual 09:30am.

As soon as I turned on the computer, I found that there was an extra resignation letter on the table.

The signature is Han Zilu.

The manager smiled, took out his favorite pen, and approved it in the manager's opinion column.

Originally, according to the contract, the resignation must be notified one month in advance, otherwise certain responsibilities will be pursued.The manager originally wanted to use this to make things difficult for Han Zilu, but Han Zilu told him directly that he would not want any unpaid wages, and he would leave after handing over the work.

Although the manager was slightly upset, he had nothing to say.

In this way, on the third morning of going to work, after Han Zilu finished his work, he handed over to the intern chef, took off his greasy apron, and left the cafeteria.

He was still neatly dressed that day, with a light blue shirt and a black suit, walking on campus, attracting many passing students to stop.

"Well, the handover has been completed, and the resignation certificate has been obtained. Okay, then at 02:30 in the afternoon, I will go to your interview." Han Zilu took the newly changed phone and used the newly applied number.

"Don't talk about interviews, you still use interviews? Our boss is absolutely assured of you."

"However, I may not be able to join the job so soon, and it will be after the year at the earliest."

"No problem, no problem. Go home and have a good New Year. We will meet in the afternoon and we will discuss it in detail. This is easy to discuss."

"Thank you then, see you this afternoon."

The interview in the afternoon was as simple as expected. Han Zilu met with the boss over there. The two of them hardly talked about work, just chatted casually about what they had learned, and the job was confirmed.

Changing jobs in a few days, Han Zilu was in no particular mood. No matter where he worked, he was always wearing a coat and apron, and his hands were full of daily necessities.

No matter the position is high or low, after the day's work is over, when he returns home at night, he is alone in the room, facing an empty room.

Even with the TV on all the time, he couldn't get rid of the ubiquitous desolation.

As midnight approached, Han Zilu bought tickets online to go home after a few days, changed into casual clothes, and took a taxi to the bar.

I haven't been to the mix in Wudaokou for a long time.

The bartenders here have changed a few times, Han Zilu scanned around, but didn't see any familiar faces.

"What would you like to drink?" The waiter leaned over and spoke Cantonese Mandarin.

Han Zilu found a seat at the corner of the bar and sat down, "Do you have any recommendations?"

"Let me recommend it. I'll recommend something strong. Today's limited-time special."

Han Zilu nodded, "Then help me choose, trust you."

"No problem." The waiter took back the drink order and winked at Han Zilu.

Han Zilu suddenly remembered why he didn't like this place before, it was because it was full of ambiguity and extremely cheap feelings that didn't cost money.

But today, he doesn't care about these.

He even gladly accepted the tequila that the person at the next table offered him.

After drinking seven or eight glasses of spirits, the lights in front of him were a little blurry.

Under the interlaced red and green spotlights, a figure walked towards him, and the emeralds on the brooch on the neckline shone faintly under the light.

Han Zilu frowned, suppressing the urge to get up and leave, and sat where he was, pretending he didn't see him.

However, Lu Teng obviously came for him, and sat down at the seat next to him, picking up half of his leftover wine.

"Long time no see," he said.

"En." Han Zilu responded.

"Did you see the text message?" Lu Teng swirled his wine glass and took a sip.

"No, I changed my phone."

"Why did you change it suddenly? The number is no longer used?"

"lost."

"Lost it? Where did you lose it? I'll find someone to find it for you."

Han Zilu smiled, "Not all lost things can be found back."

Lu Teng laughed with him: "Look, I haven't seen you for so long, and your words are still philosophical."

Han Zilu didn't speak, but looked at the wine glass.

Lu Teng ordered a few more glasses of wine for him, and stared at his side face greedily, as if he wanted to firmly imprint the Han Zilu at this moment in his heart.

Three glasses of wine were placed in front of him, Han Zilu didn't say anything, he drank one after another, then put down the glasses, stood up and left.

Lu Teng followed him and stood up.

When Han Zilu left the bar, Lu Teng followed him without saying anything.

After a short time in the downtown area, when the surroundings became quiet, Lu Teng followed closely and walked side by side with Han Zilu.

"I'm sorry, I haven't apologized to you in person, and I don't do it in Huasheng now."

"There's nothing to be sorry about," Han Zilu said.

A look of light appeared on Lu Teng's face instantly, "No, it's my fault, you ask me to apologize so that I can ask you to forgive me."

Han Zilu stopped walking, "Okay, then I forgive you, is that okay?"

Lu Teng's expression froze again, and then he suddenly said loudly: "No! I love you! I-mother loves you!"

Han Zilu frowned and continued walking. Lu Teng chased after him, wanting to hold Han Zilu's hand, but he didn't dare. He just chased him and said, "I've been worried about you since you left, and I've been trying to make up for it. Explain, it's not your fault, it's all because of me, do you know this? I mean it!"

Han Zilu: "Thank you."

Lu Teng: "I don't want you to thank me! Why do you think I went to that shabby bar today? It's not because of you! Do you know how much work I spent? Such a big Beijing city, such a big place! In every bar, I have someone help me keep an eye on you! Every bar! Do you know how many there are? Especially those few gay bars, let me tell you, every waiter in the bar has seen your photo! I just want to talk to you, do you know this?"

Han Zilu let out a long breath, stopped and turned around, "Now I know, what next?"

Lu Teng: "You don't like gays, why do you want to go?"

Han Zilu: "How do you know I don't like it? How much do you know about me?"

Lu Teng: "It's more than you think. I know you're serious about relationships. You're a clean freak. You don't like gay circles or bars."

Han Zilu: "And then?"

Lu Teng: "But you went today, Zilu, tell me honestly, do you want to find someone to accompany you? Or just looking for some excitement?"

Han Zilu: "It seems that I don't need your approval to go, Manager Lu?"

Lu Teng: "You can speak to make me angry, really, Zilu, you know how to make me angry."

Han Zilu: "Thank you, are you finished?"

Lu Teng: "No, it's not over! Han Zilu, don't you go to the bar just to find someone to play with you? You can find someone else, why can't you find me? Am I worse than others? Look, figure, family background, you go to that crappy bar Let's take a look here, how many can compare with me? Even if you just want to have fun, can't you come to me? Don't say anything else, I will never harm you, because I am sincere to you, I... Hey! I love you!"

Han Zilu sighed, "What do you love about me?"

Lu Teng didn't even think about it, "I love everything about you!"

"I do not believe."

"It doesn't matter if you don't believe me, can you try it with me? Even if you are just a companion, you use me as a decoration, you can do anything, can't we try it?"

Han Zilu was silent.

Lu Teng saw that his expression seemed to be relaxed, so he hurriedly stepped forward and took his hand, "Give me a chance, and I will make you believe it, Zilu, you believe me."

Han Zilu stared at his wrist and frowned, resisting the urge to withdraw his hand, and said in a low voice, "I already have someone I like."

In an instant, he felt Lu Teng's hand tighten.

Lu Teng was silent for a moment, "But he doesn't like you, does he?"

Han Zilu was speechless.

Lu Teng carefully put his head on Han Zilu's shoulder, and said softly, "It's okay, as long as you give me a chance, I don't care about anything else."

"Why bother?" Han Zilu slowly closed his eyes and sighed again.