[Lu Zhen] Empress Dowager is difficult

People say that the dying person will see his obsession in this life, like a revolving lantern turning around in front of his eyes.

In this revolving lantern, he saw his lifelong obsession.

Lou Zhaojun.

Three words, only her.

He met her for the first time.

Not on top of the city wall more than [-] years ago.

The time needs to be pushed forward here, to the year when he was 11 years old, he first met the six-year-old Zhaojun.She doesn't remember the past at all, but he remembers it very clearly.

At that time, she was the most honorable eldest daughter of the Lou family, and he was an apprentice in a medical clinic in the city.

One day at dusk, he was about to close the door and call it a day, but she staggered into the hospital with a rabbit in her arms, and fell in front of him with tears in her eyes: "Doctor, save the little rabbit, bad boy!" Ah Zhao beat the little rabbit until it bleeds." He probably regarded him as a doctor.

He looked at her, then reached out and flipped through the rabbit's fur, and found a bleeding wound, then calmly turned around and continued to put on the door panel: "It can't be saved, just take it back, let your mother give it to you." You finish the soup and drink..."

Before she could finish her sentence, she caught a glimpse from the corner of her eye that she pursed her mouth, then pursed her mouth again, and wiped away the tears that were about to overflow from the corner of her eyes vigorously with one hand.

He was stunned.

In fact, at that time, he grew up alone with no one to support him. When he was hungry, he could only pluck some grass and eat it. In his eyes, a rabbit was a delicious hot meal.Therefore, he really felt that this little girl was simply sick!

Then, he added slowly: "If you don't want to eat it, just give it to me, and I can help you eat it..."

The little girl in the red padded jacket was finally stimulated by his words, she pursed her lips, and suddenly said, "Wow—" and burst into tears.

This matter finally ended with the shopkeeper doctor coming forward to cure the rabbit.

The shopkeeper doctor said to him: "This is Lord Lou Neigan's precious daughter. From now on, no matter what she brings back, heal it if it can be cured. If it can't be cured, buy a new one and pretend it is cured for her."

Gao Huan: "..."

He felt that this little girl was really sick.

Then, within two days, the little girl ran into the hospital with an injured little fox in her arms again, and the sentence pattern was exactly the same as before: "Save the little fox, the bad Azhao beat the little fox to bleed." .”

But when the little fox was sent to the hospital, it had died.

The doctor in charge bought a new one from Orion's house next door and returned it to her.

The little girl squatted on the ground with her chin in her hands and looked at the frisky little fox in the cage, her eyes widened, and she raised her head to look at the shopkeeper with admiration: "Wow—doctor, you are so amazing!"

The doctor in charge touched his nose, and responded with a very cheeky: "It's easy to say." Then he went back to the backyard to wash and pick up the dead fox, and was going to cook a meal of braised fox meat tonight.

The little girl hugged the cage and laughed and wanted to go out, but Gao Huan said leisurely from behind: "Fool, your fox has died a long time ago, it was bought from Wang Er next door."

When he said this, he didn't even know why he said it.

The little girl turned around, struggled to free a hand, pulled her face and made a face at him: "You are a little liar, I don't believe you."

When he ran into the back kitchen to pick out the half-stripped dead fox, he still didn't know why he did such a thing, which was not in line with his old style of doing things.

The little girl stared blankly at the dead fox, then lowered her head to look at the cage she was holding in her arms, pursed her mouth, then pursed her mouth again, and opened her mouth to cry "Wow——".

He suddenly panicked.

At that time, he didn't know what he did or said, but when he saw her tears rolling down the corner of his eyes, he suddenly woke up.But he can't coax girls.

So, at last, he spoke to her.

"Hey, who is the bad Zhao?"

The little girl rubbed her eyes and held her mouth and turned her head to look at him: "Bad Ah Zhao is Ah Zhao, the younger brother my mother gave me."

He looked at the mist in her eyes, and coughed calmly: "He always bullies you..." After thinking for a moment, "A pet?"

The little girl nodded.

He moved closer to her, showed her a few character circuit diagrams out of thin air, and explained: "He bullied you, why didn't you bully him back? Come on, let me teach you a universal rule of survival. How will he bully you in the future... ... pet, if you bully him, he will definitely not dare to bully your... pet."

The little girl burst out a snot bubble, propped her chin with one hand to meditate on his words, and wiped the newly formed snot bubble nonchalantly with the other hand.

On the second day, Mrs. Lou stumbled into the hospital with Lou Zhao in her arms.

At that time, he didn't know that the law he said was applicable to children like them who grew up among hooligans, but it didn't apply to a lady like her.

There has always been a huge distance between him and her, like a gap that cannot and should not be crossed.

This is the first time he met her.

But he, who was killed for the first time, lost his job, and she was beaten up by her father.

The revolving lantern turned round and round, and the little girl in the picture gradually turned into a big girl, slim and graceful, with picturesque features.She loves to laugh, and is very kind to people. The smiles in the flashes of scenes are the ones he is familiar with.She laughed with the aunt who sold fruit on the side of the road, while he repaired other people's roofs; she laughed with the old beggar on the side of the street, while he weeded for others.She laughed with the boy who delivered the water, and he stood aside for others...

Those were all his familiar smiles.

Memories rushed out with cold water stains, and the golden piece swayed away in the warm and flashing wind of October.In his deep sleep, he wanted to reach out and hold the smiling girl's hand.

After all, it is still a dream.

From childhood to adulthood, he has always been alone. No one taught him what love is and how to express love.But he felt that this was not love.

The revolving lantern flashed scene after scene, and finally stopped at Zhaojun's first year of marriage to him.It was midwinter, when he came back from outside, he heard a few women's laughter before he approached.

"Oh, sister Lou, why do you use this kind of thing as a hairpin? Aren't these dry wood for burning fire?"

"That's right, throw it away quickly! How can you wear such a vulgar thing on your head!"

"..."

The laughter was loud, piercing and mean.

He stood by the side wall and listened.

Later, he walked slowly out of the side wall until the girls in brocade clothes and golden hairpins laughed and walked away.

When he opened the door and walked in, he saw her squatting on the ground, pawing in the snow with her cold red hands, and finally pulled out the thorn hairpin.Holding it in her palm, she lowered her head and remained silent for a long time.

He thought she was crying.

But she wasn't crying after all, she just squatted alone for a while, then put the Jingchai back into her bun, wiped the snow water on her hands casually on the bib, and then turned and went into the kitchen.

Probably during these movements, she murmured vaguely: "Jing Chai is also a Chai, it can also be tied up, and it is also pretty—"

He remembered the scene of that day, from beginning to end, every detail was very clear.

Looking up, you can see heavy snow falling from the sky, the sky is so low that it seems that there is no light at all, the gray, icy snow will not disappear for a long time, only the girl in coarse clothes is shining in the dark and eternal night. Dazzling light comes.

This is not supposed to be love.

Later, I don't know how many days later.

He remembered that it was a spring afternoon.

Wangcheng and the cliff outside the city looked far away, and he stood with her on the cliff, with the breeze blowing gently, and behind her was the field where she had newly planted vegetables.

The girl who rolled up her sleeves and finished hoeing the ground wiped the sweat from her forehead, and hopped up to his side, looked around with him, with a huge smile on her face, and asked him: " What are you looking at?"

He only looked at the royal city for a long time, and answered her: "There, I will let you live there sooner or later."

The girl took his hand, wiped her sweat nonchalantly, and said with a smile, "Although we are living well now, if you want to live there, I will live with you." Very melancholy: "But, what should I do with the vegetables I just planted? Also, the goose that we raised for a long time to fatten up."

He looked back at her: "Do you believe what I say?"

The girl smiled with crooked eyebrows, it was a pretty face, she said: "Believe it, my husband is the most worthy person in this world to sit on the throne."

At that time, he thought this girl was stupid, and she was kind of cute.

Then for many years, he asked himself where he started to go wrong.

But this is a delusional question.

He should ask which step is the right one.

When Lou Zhao appeared in front of him, he couldn't remember clearly.He has always been a person with a good memory, which is somewhat unbelievable.

But the fact is like this, he forgot what kind of day Lou Zhao brought him such a horrific ending, he couldn’t remember whether there should be white snow or flowers flying outside the window at that time, he couldn’t remember whether it was the morning light It's still sunset, and I still don't remember what he said to Lou Zhao.He doesn't remember many things, but he only remembers the sentence Lou Zhao asked him: "Did you never think that she would lose?"

In the cool white light, he trembled for a long time: "What happened to her?"

He looked at him and spoke slowly, with clear words.

"Dead, a fire, she was forced to commit suicide on the altar."

The booklet in his hand fell to the ground with a "pop".

The author has something to say: Orz really is, I don't feel it.This is half a side story, written in a hurry, to show my position, Gao Huan likes Zhaojun.Said that Gao Huan has another episode to explain why he seized the house and why he treated Zhaojun like that.