twice marked

The weather is really changing outside, I think? Zhang Zhendong really can't choose a day for me, such a gloomy day? Are you struck by lightning?

But there is no thunder in winter, so I can rest assured.

Although the sky was a bit heavy, it didn't prevent people from going out to play. They probably thought that there were few people coming out to play on this kind of day, but they didn't find out until they were on the street that everyone thought this way. So there are still many people.

There is no wind on the street, but the temperature is a bit low. Tibet is relatively cold at the end of March. I put on my hat, and I wear the same style of down jacket as Sheng Yun. When I arrive at Sheng Yun’s house, the clothes are basically the same. I bought it new, but neither of us could look like a couple? Because? People on the street are all in this color, all black, and boys' down jackets are mostly in this color and style.

Looking around, it was all black.

I put a hat on Sheng Yun: "This feels a bit cooler. But you are already cool enough, you smile?"

I teased him, but he only looked at my hands: "Come out? Why aren't you wearing gloves?"

"I forgot, it's not cold anyway." When I came out of his room, I followed him step by step? Ah.

I stretched out my hand to hold his arm, and other couples on the street did the same, but he didn't let me hold it, but put my hand into the pocket of his down jacket It was warm and comfortable in the pocket of the down jacket, not to mention being held by him. I laughed out loud.

He glanced sideways at me, he must be thinking? I didn't wear gloves on purpose, and I didn't refute, I just wanted to? Let him hold? My hand.

The two of us walked along the "tourist's travel" route. The first stop was the Jokhang Temple, and I had already planned it: "Let's go to pray first, there is a prayer wheel there, and you can make a wish!"

Sheng Yun repeated my words? "Make a wish?"

I introduced my strategy to him: "Yes, you write what you want to write and the people you want to bless, and the Buddha will definitely see it. Oh, by the way, last time you gave Xiao Isn’t that what Jin wrote about the stars and vixen?”

Haha, when I think of what Zhang Zhendong said, I just want to laugh. His jokes will make me laugh forever.

Sheng Yun squeezed my hand tightly in his pocket, and I coughed: "Okay, I won't mention it."

Sheng Yun still glared at me, and I pulled? He: "Come on, let's go quickly, there are too many people and we can't get in line. Last time you came? How long did you wait?"

When I heard Sheng Yun say that the queue would take about an hour, I immediately became a little anxious.

When I dragged him to that place, there was already a long queue. This wishing hall has been changed into a marriage hall by the current couple. Anyone who comes here for tourism must come here once. Look? The long line clicked: "Let's go to other places first and come back when there are fewer people? There will always be times when there are fewer people."

Sheng Yun looked at his hand and nodded: "In two hours, there will be fewer people here."

Hey, why is he so clear about this? I asked him, "Did you come last time? Have you figured out the pattern in queuing?"

Sheng Yun didn't answer me, just dragged me to other places, and we circled around here. When it was almost time, the two of us circled back again. Originally, I didn't want to come. Yes, but Sheng Yun is a rather stubborn person, so if you agree to conquer the land, you will have to go to the end.

When we came here, there were not many people there, and the two of us lined up soon.

The wishing hall is because the incense is the most prosperous, and the construction is also the most luxurious. When you enter the door, there is a big Buddha. This big Buddha is very big, even bigger than the ones we just saw. It is said that it was cast by Princess Wencheng in Tibet to commemorate? The Central Plains and Tibet have been forever married for a hundred years, so it is also the reason why many couples come here to make wishes. They say that as long as they make sincere wishes, they will come true.

The Buddha statue is merciful and solemn, which made me feel a little solemn the moment I entered this hall.My character is a bit out of character, and I smile all day long, but now I don't dare to smile like that, I look at? The big Buddha was slightly taken aback.

Sheng Yun is also looking at this Buddha, but maybe it’s because he’s been here before, he’s here now? He’s more familiar with this place than me, he pulls me forward, and he asks me to choose a pair of turns. Through the cylinder.

There are many prayer wheels here, every couple can choose a pair, put what they want to write into it, make a wish sincerely, and then give it to the other party.

When I wrote it, I said to Sheng Yun: "Don't let others see it? It's the same as making a wish on a birthday."

Sheng Yun looked at me helplessly: "You don't look at other people's, it's not bad."

What, don't let me watch it, I don't want to? Watch it!He will definitely write wish Xiaojin more and more cute, wish me more and more petite and cute?

Well, that's my own idea.And my idea itself is impossible to realize.

This fact makes me feel a little depressed.I glanced at the big Buddha again, with benevolent eyebrows and kind eyes, can he really save all sentient beings?

Does that mean that anything I write can be achieved?

I have thousands of wishes in my heart, I hope that Xiaojin is healthy, safe and happy; I hope that my father is healthy and safe; I hope that Zhendong is healthy and becomes famous soon...

I hope Shengyun is in good health, safe and happy, with a bright future, and a strong, loving partner who can match him...I hope that person is me.

But is this wish too extravagant?I am a person who stands motionless? Is the Buddha willing to fulfill my wish?

At this moment, I actually thought of a story: Someone questioned the Buddha: "I come every day to worship you, and I am very respectful. Why do you never realize your desire for stability? A lottery ticket, I don’t ask for more, can’t I just ask for 500 million?!”

The Buddha finally said helplessly: If you don't buy a lottery ticket first, you will get three discounts a day, and I can't bless you to win.

I feel like I'm that big rascal right now, asking for nothing.

And I was asking too much.

Chen Bu said that the wish here should be sincere and not too much, because too much would be difficult for the Buddha.

But the word "sincerity" stumped me, I was not sincere.

So I didn't write a single word?I am afraid that the Buddha will blame me for being too greedy. I have already got it from Sheng Yun? Too much, I am afraid that the Buddha will take him back. No, I cannot use this word, it is too unlucky.

I folded my hands and pleaded guilty.

Sheng Yun has finished writing. He folded the paper neatly and put it in his prayer wheel. Seeing that I still don’t move, he wants to stretch out his hand? go in?"

No need, I immediately stuffed my note into my prayer wheel.I have folded it too? I have folded it? A few times, who made me press it for a long time without writing a word.

Sheng Yun glanced at me: "For so long, have you written a lot?"

I coughed: "Don't ask, just make a wish first."

I looked at? He clasped his hands and closed his eyes. He looked very handsome when he made a wish, because he was devout, solemn and solemn, like a god, and he was my god.

My eyes were a little hot, so I quickly closed them.

When I opened my eyes again, he had already opened them, and his hands were standing neatly by his side.Looking at the Buddha statue in front of me, I smiled at him and said, "You agreed so soon? Then let's go."

I was about to stand up from the futon, but I was pulled back by him again. He didn't look at me, but only looked at the Buddha statue in front of me and said, "Xie Shen'an, the master of marriage, today I want to ask you something thing."

I felt my hand tremble, and he squeezed my hand tightly. He didn't allow me to ask, but continued: "The Buddha doesn't lie in front of the Buddha, so Xie Shen'an, do you dare to answer me?"

I opened my mouth? "What... what?"

Maybe it was because of my stuttering? As for his displeasure, he frowned slightly, and looked at me with burning eyes: "Answer my question."

He was probably afraid that I would run away, so he held my hand firmly and asked softly:

"Xie Shen'an, are you willing to be? Will my partner enter into a marriage contract with me?"

I looked at him in a daze? He, is this a marriage proposal?There is no priest's prayer, no matchmaker's matchmaking, no family's blessing, only each other, and only this Buddha above our heads.

Is it too crude?That's why I didn't answer for a long time?

I didn't answer right away. Sheng Yun would have been angry in the past, but he didn't this time. Instead, he looked at me gently? I said the above sentence word by word? In sickness or in health, or for any other reason, I will love you, take care of you, respect you, accept you, and be faithful to you till the end of my life."

If I hadn't been overwhelmed by his gentle face, I wouldn't have dared to look into his eyes. His eyes seemed to live in a deep sea, and I was afraid that if I looked too much, I would drown in it.

Of course, I'm already sinking in it now, and my heart has already been filled with great waves because of? His words?

This is the marriage vow, I have heard it said so by the priest in the wedding hall with Gao Yu six years ago.

But my marriage came to an end in just four years because I cheated.

I feel that my hand is hot from his grip, I want to pull it out, but Sheng Yun is holding me tightly, he looks at me and asks gently with my eyes: "Xie Shen'an, tell me Me, are you willing to love me? Are you willing to spend the rest of your life with me? Are you willing to be with everyone... No, not everyone, you are willing to say in front of the Buddha that you are willing to be loyal to me until the end of your life, sharing joys and sorrows, Were there no secrets from each other?"

I felt uncomfortable in my throat, I moved my mouth a few times, but I didn't make a sound, because I also knew what I was going to say? I didn't have the face to speak out.

I want to tell him that I am willing, I love him, I can love him for a lifetime, and there will be no problem in the next life. If there is no need to drink Mengpo soup on the Naihe Bridge, I will not drink it.I would like to be with him in my next life.

The next life is like a joke? It's so perfunctory.

I also know that I am too shameless to be forced by Sheng Yun like this? I said.

He is different from me, he is the kind of person who never drags his feet, have I made him have enough these days?

So he can no longer bear my ambiguity and ambiguity, right?

It was probably because I kept my mouth shut for a long time without letting out a fart. Sheng Yun was finally disappointed in me. He let go of my hand and looked at me. I smiled slowly: "Xie Shen'an, you really didn't Let me down, you as always,"

He seemed to be looking for a suitable word, I blinked, I knew what Sheng Yun was going to say, and sure enough he said to me: "Cowardly, Xie Shen'an, you are not only cowardly but also shameless."

I remembered what Qin Xuesheng said to me. He said that my feelings for him were too weak. I got his feelings but it was not good. Okay? Protect him? I can’t protect him? It doesn’t matter, but I still want to? With? Give him to someone else!

I am cowardly and shameless.

But I was still able to quibble: "I'm not shameless..."

I'm most afraid of people saying I'm shameless.

I don't know how to call it shameful, because I don't have any sense of shame when I come here. I, an OMEGA who doesn't even know who the child is, have the face to say that I am ashamed?I am an OMEGA who still thinks about adulterers in my dreams because of lack of desire. What face do I have to say that I am ashamed?

I look forward to Sheng Yun's love for me every day, just because? I think? Let him do me, so that I don't have to dream again? That kind of shameless dream, just like I used to look forward to every day? Gao Yu went home and hugged me too.

I'm just a shameless person who looks at the pot while eating in the bowl.

The Buddha said that there are no two, but I just go from one day to another, and I don’t know how to check.

Xie Shen An, you are really shameless.

I lowered my head, can I see? His clenched hands, I heard? He said again next to me: "Xie Shen'an, let me ask you one last time, have you really loved me? A unique love without distractions Have you passed me?"

When he asked this sentence, I felt a pain like a needle prick in my heart. Sheng Yun never wanted to force it. He said last time that he would never wait for me a second time, but he gave it to me. My second chance.

He just wants such a simple love, a love that is so simple for any couple. OMEGA is always loyal to his ALPHA and has no distractions.

But why can't I do it?Why? What am I dreaming about? That person, why? What?

I obviously never dreamed of him again these days, why did I dream of him again last night?Why did I dream about it at this moment when he asked me?

God bless all people, except me.

He turned around and looked at me. He probably couldn't wait any longer, I saw? His eyes were red.

I have only seen Sheng Yunhong's eyes twice in my life. One time was on a snow mountain. After the avalanche, my eyes were removed from the black cloth for the first time after snow blindness. He watched? I said: "I thought? You are going to be blind It's over."

He spoke? Not good? Listening, I was not used to the light at that time, and I blinked several times to see him clearly. I'm sure I saw the red threads in his eyes.

The other time he scolded me before I got married, he scolded me too hard, I was in a hurry to scold me, right?

I was also caught by? His angry eyes, I don't want to? Looking at him again, I turned around and ran, and I didn't apologize for bumping into someone, I thought? That person bumped me into more pain, and my tears came out from? You know, I seldom cry in my life. My grandfather dislikes crying children the most. I am no longer his favorite ALPHA, so I can no longer be a soft and crying little OMEGA.

I've been running for a long time before I slowly recalled that just now he was also scolded by me with red eyes, right?

Red eyes twice, Xie Shen'an, don't you know why? What?

Xie Shen'an, he just likes you, he likes you so much, why? Why didn't you love him? Why? Why did you love him so late? Why didn't you dare tell him that you loved him?

Just one word, one simple word, Xie Shen'an, even if you try to trick him? Ah.

But I couldn’t say a single word? From the very beginning, I felt like a dumb acupoint was tapped. I opened and closed my mouth like a dumb person. Nothing.

I can't lie to him.

I can't lie to him.

If I could still say loudly in my heart that I love him, and I am willing to love him for the rest of my life and the next life, but when faced with his words that directly hit the bottom of my heart, I would be speechless. Come on, I At this moment, I deeply understand that even if I love him, I am defiled him, just like what Qin Xuesheng said.

I have always known how pure he is, his love should be snow-stained, pure and flawless, and my body and soul are already unsightly.

I clearly understand at this moment? The reason why I have been afraid to stand with him openly is not because of Sheng's mother's obstruction, not because of the opposing relationship between our two families, not because of Qin Xuesheng, not by anyone, but by myself. I am not worthy to stand beside him.

I just kept my head down and looked at his hand silently. His hand shook slightly, and then slowly pinched it.I thought? He was going to get up, but he didn't. I heard his voice again: "Xie Shen'an, if you can do it, do it in the future? If you will never leave me?, in front of the Buddha Kowtow."

He was saying to me, 'Is it okay to have someone else in my heart? '

He lowered the requirements to? So low?Xie Shen'an, what can you do?

How nice it would be if I could go back to the past? When I carried him on my back, I was willing to carry him for the rest of my life. Whether it was his lame leg or his coma on the snow mountain, I would carry him forever. Don't give up, even if I go in the wrong direction, go to Siberia and be frozen to death by both, I will not leave him.

But Sheng Yun, I don't think at all? You are wronged, you are not the kind of person who can be wronged at all.In the two months you are with me now, how many days are you happy?You can't even go home.Even Qin Xuesheng can see that you are not happy.

I tried my best to straighten my back. I exhausted all the strength of breastfeeding. I was about to crush my teeth, so I could control my noble head.

My back is too easy to bend, because? There are few things in this life that are worth the moment when I hold my head high.The only time I got commended for my skiing and got a job that helped, but then again I got caught in an avalanche.

It was Sheng Yun who was buried in the snow, but I couldn't straighten my back anymore, I thought? I would rather not have that little arrogance, I would rather be a waste, I just want to be a waste all the time?

I'm one of those broomsticks, right?

Nothing good happened when Sheng Yun met me, even his life was almost lost.

The author has something to say: This is the last chapter.