Unbearable

Ji Zhonghan was halfway through eating, only to realize that Feng Qi hadn't touched his chopsticks for a long time.Could it be that Feng Qi's taste has changed, he doesn't like to eat these things?

When I looked up, I realized that the other party was staring at the phone with an unpredictable expression, not knowing what he was looking at.

Ji Zhonghan asked: "What's the matter, does the program team have something to ask you to go back?"

Feng Qi put away his phone, shook his head and said no.

He didn't mean to say more, and Ji Zhonghan didn't want to ask too much.

After eating supper and going back, it was getting late.Feng Qi didn't send him back to the hotel, but instead drove him to the riverside on a motorcycle, saying that he wanted to take him to relax.

I don't know if it was because his avoidance attitude in the program group affected Feng Qi, so Feng Qi didn't make physical contact with him outside today.

They walked side by side, elbows rubbing against each other, which was the most ambiguous distance, and for Ji Zhonghan, it was also the closest contact.

The night wind blew away a lot of troubles, Ji Zhonghan left all Stockholm behind him, just wanted to immerse himself in the relaxation of the moment.

He stepped on the grass, recalled the past, couldn't help laughing and said, "Does it look like a place we used to go to?"

The riverside where Feng Qi said he wanted to confess his love to Wen Yuan.

Thinking of this, Ji Zhonghan realized that it was impossible for Feng Qi to confess his love to Wen Yuan.Then it became obvious who Feng Qi really wanted to confess to at the riverside.

So tonight, why did Feng Qi bring him to the river again?Could it be that he wanted to make up for his previous confession?

Ji Zhonghan stopped in his tracks, and after Feng Qi walked a certain distance, he realized that he hadn't followed, so he turned his head.

Feng Qi neither asked him what was the matter, nor took the initiative to speak, but just looked at him silently.

He realized that Feng Qi didn't answer what he said just now.

Could it be because the confession by Jiangbian was a failed confession and a bad memory for Feng Qi, so he couldn't answer in a relaxed tone like Ji Zhonghan.

Ji Zhonghan felt annoyed, as if after discovering Feng Qi's intentions, he often felt indebted, because of his own slowness, because of his previous ignorance.

"I'm sorry." Ji Zhonghan apologized.

The lamps by the river came one after another, and Feng Qi happened to be standing under the light: "What are you apologizing for?"

Ji Zhonghan raised his legs and walked slowly to Feng Qi: "I shouldn't mention that river."

Feng Qi stretched out his hand, and first grabbed Ji Zhonghan's arm. This was the first time he touched Ji Zhonghan today. From the arm to the back, there was a hug.

Ji Zhonghan was still a little stiff in Feng Qi's arms, but as time passed, he gradually softened, and melted into soft candy in Feng Qi's arms.

Feng Qi buried the tip of his nose into his neck: "Don't apologize, I like you, it's not something you should apologize for."

"At that time, I wanted to confess to you, but I was too timid. I was afraid that you would be afraid of me after hearing it, so I didn't dare to say it." Feng Qi said softly.

Ji Zhonghan didn't know what his reaction would be if Feng Qi had confessed his love to him at that time, he might be nervous, distressed, or even incomprehensible, but he would never be afraid.

He lightly pressed his hand on Feng Qi's back, patted it twice tentatively, and said comfortingly: "I'm not afraid now." After a pause, Ji Zhonghan added: "And this time I took the initiative to kiss you." Isn't yours?"

Feng Qi chuckled: "What were you thinking at that time?"

Ji Zhonghan couldn't answer. At that time, he was more thinking about trying it out, obeying his instinctive behavior, and he didn't even think about saying anything.

Feng Qi rubbed his hair vigorously: "Anyway, you can't regret it now."

After finishing speaking, Feng Qi let him go, took his hand instead, and took him to sit on a bench by the river.

The feeling of walking hand in hand is very strange and novel. He looked at his tightly clasped hands with Feng Qi. Feng Qi's palms were no longer as delicate as before. He remembered that when he was a teenager, Feng Qi's hands were very beautiful. .

At that time, Feng Qi had also learned the piano, with slender fingers and delicate palms.

Now the palms are slightly rough, with calluses, I don't know if I have done too much work before, and I haven't recovered my hands so far.

And that knee, it hurts when it rains, why is this man in pain all over his body.

Seeing that he hadn't spoken for a long time, Feng Qi asked him, "What are you thinking?"

"You." Ji Zhonghan said.

Feng Qi looked at him in surprise, and after a while, his ears were slightly red: "Where did you learn this?"

Ji Zhonghan stretched out his hand through the clothes and pressed it on Feng Qi's pants: "What's the matter with this leg?"

Feng Qi wrote lightly: "There was a car accident."

"When did it happen?" Ji Zhonghan asked what he wanted to know the most.

Feng Qi looked at him for a long time before saying, "When you don't know."

This unfavorable answer made Ji Zhonghan frowned: "To be honest, don't lie to me."

Feng Qi still didn't speak.

Ji Zhonghan actually already had the answer in his heart, but he didn't dare to ask it out, but now, enduring the soreness on the tip of his nose, he still asked: "Is it the day you chased me at the airport?"

Feng Qi still didn't speak, Ji Zhonghan wrinkled the pants on Feng Qi's knees: "You..." His voice was hoarse in his throat, and it took him a long time to continue: "How could you be so nonsense, why didn't you go to the hospital at that time?"

Feng Qi pressed on the back of his hand: "I didn't feel any pain at the time, but I was even more afraid that you would leave, and that my fall would waste time."

"Your body is the most important thing!" Ji Zhonghan raised his voice a little, but he couldn't help it.

Feng Qi begged for mercy: "Okay, it's all right now."

"Why are you okay? Last time you hurt like this on a rainy day, you still said you were okay?" Ji Zhonghan disagreed.

Feng Qi grabbed his hand and couldn't help laughing, a bit abhorrently.

Ji Zhonghan took a breath, turned his eyes away from him, and didn't turn around until the soreness in his eyes subsided a little: "Why did Feng Xinglu hit you later?"

At the mention of this name, Feng Qi's smile faded a lot.

Ji Zhonghan didn't want to mention him either, but he wanted to know everything about that year.

Feng Qi played with his fingers and said to him, "Because I want to sever the father-son relationship with him."

So Feng Xinglu was so ruthless?Hit his own son with a comminuted fracture, and still leave him alone in the hospital?

Feng Qi continued: "He didn't agree, so I told him that I'm gay and I can't pass on the family line to him. I asked him to give birth to another one while he still had time, so that the incense wouldn't burn out on me."

Feng Qi's voice was very sarcastic, and Ji Zhonghan could imagine the expression on his face when he said this to Feng Xinglu, it was probably quite irritating.

Feng Qi came out of the closet just like that back then?No wonder Feng Xinglu was so determined to ignore him.

Just as Ji Zhonghan was thinking, he felt that Feng Qi had been staring at him, and he couldn't help touching his face: "What's wrong?"

Feng Qi shook his head and said, "Then what about you, do you have someone you like in a foreign country these years?"

When he said this, Feng Qi's expression looked nonchalant, as if he didn't care whether Ji Zhonghan had been in a lot of relationships.

Ji Zhonghan thought that Feng Qi once misunderstood his relationship with Xu Wei, and thought he had a crush on Wen Yuan.

What he said before, Feng Qi regarded him as sophistry, but now that he can speak well, Ji Zhonghan will naturally explain.

"No, I didn't fall in love with anyone." Ji Zhonghan said.

Ji Zhonghan thought of Yao Ye, and said again: "I don't even have an ambiguous partner, unlike you."

Feng Qi raised his eyebrows and said, "What's wrong with me?"

"Haven't you searched for yourself online?" Ji Zhonghan asked back.

Feng Qi really hasn't searched it. Anyone who has nothing to do online searches for his own crimes, and he doesn't know how many false rumors there are.

Ji Zhonghan said: "There are always so many people around you, they all thought you had something to do with Yao Ye, and then one time... didn't you regard me as Yao Ye?"

Feng Qi immediately retorted: "When did I treat you as Yao Ye!"

Ji Zhonghan mentioned that Yao Ye came out of Feng Qi's room that day, he went in, and was hugged by the drunk Feng Qi on the bed, treating him tenderly.

While talking, Ji Zhonghan suddenly realized that Feng Qi didn't seem to have called Yao Ye at all that day.

It's just that he preconceived that Yao Ye had just left his room, and if he walked in again, he would be mistaken by Feng Qi.

What if Feng Qi was right?The more he thought about it, the hotter Ji Zhonghan's cheeks became.

Feng Qi seemed to realize what kind of misunderstanding Ji Zhonghan had, and smiled at him playfully: "So you think I regard you as Yao Ye? No wonder, you are angry with me."

Ji Zhonghan said: "I wasn't angry at that time, I just felt that if you recognized me, you wouldn't treat me so well."

He was telling the truth, these words fell into Feng Qi's ears, but the smile on his face disappeared.

Feng Qimo fell silent, and apologized to Ji Zhonghan in a low voice.

Ji Zhonghan rubbed his ears: "It's okay, it's normal for you to hate me at that time."

"I don't hate you." Feng Qi said seriously.

Ji Zhonghan didn't look at Feng Qi, but was pinched by Feng Qi's chin, and forced to turn in another direction.

Feng Qi stared at Ji Zhonghan's eyes and said: "When we first met, I really hated you."

The word hate is very harsh, too extreme, Ji Zhonghan's heart felt a slight constriction when he heard it.

Feng Qi's voice was extremely low, and the more he spoke, the closer he got: "I hate you for walking away for so long, I hate you for being with someone else, I hate you for disgusting me, I hate you... why can't it be mine."

Speaking of the last sentence, Feng Qi's voice was unbelievably soft.

At the same time, his lips were very close to Ji Zhonghan's: "The night we met, I had a dream when I went back."

As if being bewitched, Ji Zhonghan murmured like in a dream: "What did you dream about?"

He only felt that there seemed to be an ambiguous and surging flavor between him and Feng Qi, entangled him and Feng Qi tightly, the more he struggled, the thicker it became, and he could only get closer to get a little breathing space .

Ji Zhonghan only felt that his head was dizzy. He was clearly not drunk, but he seemed to be drunk, his head could not think, and his rationality could not be found.

Feng Qi reached out and clasped the back of his head possessively. Before kissing his lips, he said in a low voice, "As it is now, you can let me...do whatever I want."