Don't look for the old attack in the crematorium

The pain came from the wound quickly, and the blood rushed out first. Gu Wenyu looked at the blood that kept flowing down and suddenly remembered what Lin Qingran said to him.

[...After all, watching the blood flow from my wrist, don't have some pleasure~]

The expression of Lin Qingran smiling and saying these words indifferently at that time slowly appeared in his mind. Under the moonlight, there was a bottomless cold light in those clear eyes without the slightest warmth.

Like... an empty shell without a soul...

He Yi's words gradually surfaced, repeating in his mind.

He Yi said: "Lin Qingran said that only by feeling the pain in his body and watching the blood flow out little by little, can he feel alive."

feeling alive...

That's right, under the double blow of his "Gu Yanqing" game exposure and grandma's death, Lin Qingran was already exhausted physically and mentally.

Before the truth of the matter was exposed, "Gu Yanqing" was the sunshine to Lin Qingran, the ray of light that penetrated into his gloomy world.

After the truth of the place was shattered, he, Gu Wenyu, pushed Lin Qingran from the abyss where the light had finally penetrated into a deeper abyss, and his grandma was his only hope.

But...God did not take pity on him, but snatched his last hope and plunged him into darkness forever.

In the seven years since Lin Qingran left, he has worked very hard to prop up this incomplete body with his fragmented soul, and he has been working very hard to regain the feeling of being alive.

Why didn't he find out?Didn't he keep looking at Lin Qingran?Why didn't he find out for so long that his eyes had actually lost their light?

Gu Wenyu's heart seemed to be wrapped in a huge net, and the tearing feeling of suffocation made his hand holding the glass shards tighten.

He removed the blood-stained fragment, and drew another deep blood mark on the intact skin of his wrist.

Seeing the oozing of blood, he felt the pain of the wound on his wrist, he gritted his teeth, the bitterness at the corner of his mouth gradually expanded and flowed through his whole body.

When the glass slashed across the skin, it pierced deeper into the flesh, scratching the blood vessels one by one, and the flesh also felt bursts of tingling pain when the blood gushed out.

It hurts...it really hurts...

How did Lin Qingran, who is so afraid of pain, endure the wound that even he felt pain?

He Yi's words kept flashing in his mind over and over again.

[Lin Qingran said that only when he felt the pain in his body and watched the blood flow out little by little, could he feel alive. ]

[Lin Qingran said that only when he felt the pain in his body and watched the blood flow out little by little, could he feel alive. ]

[Lin Qingran said that only when he felt the pain in his body and watched the blood flow out little by little, could he feel alive. ]

……

Lin Qingran's indifferent eyes appeared in front of his eyes, those eyes full of light that used to smile and he looked forward to the future are now filled with endless darkness.

The cold light reflected by the blood-stained glass under the light suddenly dazzled Gu Wenyu's eyes, and the cold light pierced into his eyes little by little, and then slowly and hard pierced into his heart.

Looking up at the crystal chandelier on the ceiling and the warm light shining down from the chandelier, he felt his whole body soaked in bitterness, and his heart ached so that he was suffocating.

The warm light in Lin Qingran's eyes before was extinguished bit by bit by his identity as "Gu Yanqing" in the endless dark abyss.

"Hahahahaha I'm an asshole!"

Gu Wenyu laughed, he was lying on the sofa, laughing madly and terrifyingly, the blood on his wrist was still pouring out, and the smell of blood was wafting in the surrounding air.

"...Brother?" Gu Haifeng opened the door and came in, and was really taken aback when he heard Gu Wenyu's crazy laughter.

He stood at the door blankly for a long time, and frowned when he smelled the smell of blood floating in the air: "Why is there a smell of blood?"

Looking in Gu Wenyu's direction, he caught a glimpse of the man leaning on the sofa with messy hair scattered, and his current appearance was even more decadent than the two decadent appearances of Gu Wenyu he had seen before.

"Brother, what's wrong with you?" Gu Haifeng walked over, and when he saw Gu Wenyu's hand clearly, he couldn't help shouting in shock: "Brother, your hand is bleeding!"

"How did you get it?!" He panicked for a moment, the blood on Gu Wenyu's hands kept gushing out, and there was a large pool of blood seeping into the carpet on the carpet.

"Doctor, doctor!" Gu Haifeng panicked more than before. After all, this is not a trivial matter. If this continues, he will go into shock if he loses too much blood. If it is serious, he may even die!

Gu Haifeng slowly calmed down amidst the flustered hands and feet, took out his mobile phone and called the doctor.

The last time Gu Wenyu self-harmed while holding the shards of glass gave him some experience. Although he was more flustered than last time, he was not at a loss.

After the phone call, Gu Haifeng hurriedly helped Gu Wenyu stop the bleeding based on his common sense of first aid. He was in a hurry and in a hurry, many beads of sweat oozed from his forehead.

"Brother, are you crazy? Do you still want to commit suicide?!"

Hearing the sound, Gu Wenyu chuckled, his eyes stared blankly at the crystal lamp on the ceiling, his thin lips moved slightly, and he said slowly: "...tonight I saw many such cut marks on Ranran's hands... "

"... There are deep ones, shallow ones, and some old wounds that have not healed and new wounds... Disorderly scars are all over his wrist..."

The corner of his mouth twitched slightly, he choked for a while, and said in a hoarse voice: "...But I said... Only when I feel the pain can I feel alive..."

Gu Haifeng was stunned, he took a moment to raise his head, looking at Gu Wenyu's depressed dark eyes, he pursed his lips and did not speak.

"...Grandma is gone... But he said he has no home, his last hope has been taken away, he has been struggling in pain for seven years, but I didn't find out at all..."

Gu Wenyu's dark eyes flooded with a layer of water, and he murmured in a daze: "... I don't know what I have experienced in the past seven years, but I often drink too much, and I don't know the reason... ..."

"He Yi said that Ranran hasn't had a good night's sleep in the past seven years... Now think about it..." He laughed bitterly a few times, and his hoarse voice was filled with grief.

"It's probably because Ranran drank too much in order to fall asleep... Torturing his body like this is also because the pain in his heart is unbearable..."

"...But these... I only found out today... I, he/mother, only now find out what kind of life Ranran has lived for the past seven years!"

Gu Wenyu gasped heavily, picked up another bottle of wine on the table and threw it on the wine cabinet.

"The root cause of these things is because of me... because of my fucking fucking game! It's my fault... it's all my fault..."

Gu Wenyu held his head in both hands, and inserted his slender fingers into his thick/black hair roots. He sat on the sofa and leaned over, his chest heaving violently because of the violent panting/breathing.

Gu Haifeng sat on the side, not knowing how to deal with this situation. He knew that Lin Qingran had suffered a lot, but he didn't expect his grandma to pass away at that juncture.

For Lin Qingran, he had already suffered a serious injury, and his favorite family member left him at that time, it would indeed be a great blow to him.

If it were him, he might be more unbearable than Lin Qingran.

Gu Haifeng tried to open his mouth a few times, but he couldn't say a word to comfort Gu Wenyu, because he didn't know how to comfort him, and he wasn't qualified to do so.

In Nuo Da's living room, the smell of wine and blood mixed together and wafted in the air. The smashed wine bottles and the glass-shattered wine cabinet made all this look slightly messy.

The doctor arrived very quickly, looking at the current living room very calmly, after all, after seeing the mess in the main house last time, his ability to accept it is much higher now.

Going to Gu Wenyu, the doctor was still shocked when he saw the wound on Gu Wenyu's wrist.

The wound on the wrist this time is much more serious than the wound Gu Wenyu cut his palm last time. The blood that flowed down and soaked the carpet is now congealed into a ball, mixed with a thick and unpleasant smell of blood.

Several wounds were cut on Gu Wenyu's wrist. The wounds were deep, and every wound could be seen with a cut of flesh. Gu Haifeng couldn't bear to look at it, and turned his head away.

The doctor helped Gu Wenyu treat the wound with a solemn expression. Fortunately, he was prepared after the previous incidents and brought all the things he needed and didn't need.

"Master Gu, are you—" going to cut your wrists and commit suicide?

Halfway through the words, the doctor didn't dare to continue. Gu Haifeng glanced at the doctor nervously. Seeing that the doctor didn't continue to ask questions, he slowly relaxed his tense nerves.

Gu Wenyu's wound was healed, and it was almost dawn. The man looked at the time and called his aunt to tidy up the living room, and then walked to the kitchen.

Gu Haifeng looked at Gu Wenyu nervously and said, "Brother, why are you going?"

The doctor also shouted worriedly: "Master Gu, your wound cannot touch water!"

Gu Wenyu didn't look back, and said in a hoarse voice: "It's almost dawn, but I have to get up and have breakfast later, and I have to cook it quickly."

Gu Haifeng pursed his lower lip when he heard the sound, looked at Gu Wenyu's back and said nothing.

The doctor didn't know much, so he couldn't help but ask, "Master Gu can cook?"

Gu Haifeng nodded, leaned tiredly on the back of the sofa, and said weakly: "My brother started learning to cook seven years ago after his senior left."

Recalling, he sighed softly: "Although he has been learning to cook all these years, he hardly enters the kitchen before the senior comes back. It is only after the senior comes back that he starts cooking every meal by himself."

The doctor looked at the skillful man making breakfast on the island in the kitchen, and said appreciatively, "Master Gu is quite affectionate, but sometimes he is a tyrant."

Hearing the word "tyrant", Gu Haifeng couldn't help laughing: "The description is quite correct. My brother's personality is not like that of my uncle and aunt, but he is very similar to my grandfather."

He poured a glass of water and drank a few sips: "I heard from my dad that because of my grandfather's dictatorial personality, it was really a bumpy road when he chased my grandma, but I didn't expect my brother..."

Gu Haifeng paused, then took another sip of water: "Life is like chess, you can't regret any wrong move, who knows what will happen in the future..."

Although what Gu Haifeng said was ambiguous, the doctor understood a little bit, and wisely did not ask further questions.

The doctor packed up his things and left Gu Wenyu's house. Gu Haifeng was so tired that he just wanted to spread out on the sofa after being busy for most of the night.

"Wow~" Meat Floss poked the sleeping Gu Haifeng's hand with his paw, and looked at him beside the sofa, wagging his tail.

When Gu Wenyu was busy in the past, he would let Gu Haifeng take care of the meat floss instead, so Gu Haifeng can be regarded as the one who has the best relationship with the meat floss besides Lin Qingran.

"Hmm..." Gu Haifeng opened his eyes in a daze, rubbed his sleepy eyes and saw the meat floss beside him, he picked up the meat floss and lay down for a while.

"Morning meat floss~"

"Ow~"

Gu Haifeng and Rousong teased for a while, suddenly remembered something and sat up suddenly, he looked up the stairs, and as expected, he saw Lin Qingran and He Yi at a glance.

He glanced at Lin Qingran's hand, looked at the bracer on his wrist, and suddenly saw it clearly.

Lin Qingran was always wearing a wristband outside, no wonder his brother didn't notice the scar on Lin Qingran's wrist.

"Of course I have fresh shrimp porridge today." Gu Wenyu's voice was soft, but it couldn't hide his hoarseness.

He didn't sleep all night, and he started cooking breakfast immediately after the injury on his hand was treated, and he drank so much wine.

He Yi looked at Gu Wenyu with an unhappy expression.

Gu Wenyu has washed up now, and he has taken care of his downcast appearance before, so he is clean and dry, and has a calm charm.

Because he drank so much wine and didn't sleep all night, the corners of his eyes were bloodshot, and there was a layer of gray-black shadows in the blue eyes, but the hormones became more intense.

He Yi frowned, and inadvertently caught a glimpse of the bandage wrapped around Gu Wenyu's wrist, and a gleam of joy suddenly flashed in his eyes.

"Mr. Gu, why are you so careless, you can even hurt your hands while cooking?" He Yi deliberately mocked.

Gu Wenyu's eyes were cold, he ignored He Yi's ridicule, and pushed the soft and fragrant steamed dumplings in front of Lin Qingran.

He said in a gentle voice: "Of course, eat some dumplings. The stuffing is chicken with mushrooms. You said you like it before."

"Mr. Gu has a really good memory." Lin Qingran raised her eyelashes lightly, and said with a half-smile: "But it's a pity, that was in the past, and I don't like it now."

Pushing the plate of dumplings away, he lowered his eyelashes and drank the porridge. His long eyelashes covered the emotion in his eyes, but they couldn't hide the shadow under his eyes.

Looking at Lin Qingran's exquisite face, the light gray shadow under his eyes is obvious on his fair face, and it's clear that he didn't sleep well last night.

Alcoholics rely on alcohol to paralyze their nerves and expect to fall asleep, so how can he sleep well under normal circumstances.

Gu Wenyu lowered his eyelids, his throat was choked up, his heart seemed to be eaten by insects and ants, his heartache and heartache surged up, and he slowly clenched his lowered hand.

The wound on his left hand was tensed because of his hand, and the wound started to hurt. The anesthesia had long since expired, but the pain in the wound could not match the pain in his heart now.

Lin Qingran had no show today, so after breakfast, he and He Yi went back to the room, and the meat floss followed them back to the room.

Gu Haifeng just wanted to sleep after breakfast. Before he went to the guest room to sleep, he still worriedly told Gu Wenyu: "Brother, you haven't slept all night, don't force yourself to go to sleep, even if you sleep for a while."

Gu Wenyu didn't go to the company today. He was dealing with company affairs at home. After finishing the documents to be processed, he leaned his head on the office chair and squeezed the space between his tired brows.

There will be a meeting later, because he is not in the company, so it has been changed to a video conference.

The video conference didn't last long, and it ended in half an hour. After turning off the video, he closed his eyes and meditated, not knowing what he was thinking.

Time passed bit by bit, and half an hour later, Gu Wenyu suddenly opened his eyes, looking forward with fierce cold eyes.

After a few seconds, his long and narrow eyes drooped slightly, and then he closed his eyes, his heart throbbing suddenly.

He murmured in a hoarse voice: "...But how many nights like this have I experienced...how many tortures I have suffered..."

After the video conference just now, although he was very tired physically, he couldn't fall asleep. His brain was sober and highly nervous, so he could only close his eyes to rest his mind.

Just taking a nap like this, but when he suddenly woke up, he was surrounded by overwhelming depression and despair, and his spirit was constantly tense.

Clenching his fists tightly, he took a deep breath, but the corners of his mouth were bitter.

In such a mental state, how could he not want to numb himself with alcohol?

Thinking of He Yi saying that Lin Qingran couldn't fall asleep without taking sleeping pills a few years ago, the bitterness in the corner of Gu Wenyu's mouth continued to spread, penetrating into the depths of his heart.

Under the double fatal blow, Lin Qingran's spirit had collapsed to the extreme, how could she be able to sleep.

Over the past few years, he has been drinking heavily, probably because the doctor stopped prescribing sleeping pills for him...

Thinking of this, the wound on Gu Wenyu's wrist began to ache. He looked down at his bandaged wound, but his heart hurt even more, as if a knife was stabbing at him one after another.

But...his pain was not even one thousandth of what Lin Qingran suffered.

"The movie you're filming now will be finished in a few days after you finish shooting your ending scene, and the new movie I'm picking up for you will start filming in the middle of next month." He Yi said, sorting out Lin Qingran's itinerary.

Lin Qingran was reading the new novel of this play, he hadn't finished it last time, so he nodded, and thanked him gently: "Thank you for your hard work."

He Yi tidied up the last things, raised his head and said, "Come on, but I have to remind you not to get too involved in the drama, especially in that drama where your role..."

He didn't say the following words, and sighed helplessly: "Anyway, try to restrain yourself, anyway, you can express your feelings well even if you don't get into the drama."

"By the way." He Yi suddenly remembered something, and said, "The paparazzi took pictures of your affair with Yang Jiu last time, and the paparazzi found me and wanted to ask for a sum of money, but they couldn't find him later, and the photos were gone." Expose it."

Just as Lin Qingran was about to turn the pages of the novel, his hand suddenly paused, his eyelashes were drooping, and his face was calm and indifferent.

He said calmly: "It should be Gu Wenyu who suppressed it. Isn't the matter between him and me very sensational? face."

He Yi listened and nodded. From Lin Qingran's words, he probably knew what was going on at that time. He frowned and said, "You can't drink while filming that movie, and I will find you when the time comes."

"It doesn't matter." Lin Qingran smiled slightly: "I have a sense of proportion, you just do your own thing."

"You didn't go to find your boyfriend during this time, did you? You can use that time to accompany your boyfriend when the time comes."

When actors are filming, they are rarely accompanied by an agent, usually an assistant is by their side, but Lin Qingran basically has no use for an assistant.

He Yi heard the sound vaguely, and changed the subject: "I'm busy these days, and the family affairs haven't been done yet."

He Yi's family runs a company. They are not rich but they are not short of money. It's just that the family relationship is a bit complicated, and he doesn't want to stay at home.

He is the youngest son, and he has an older brother. Although the family relationship is weak, he can still live on. However, a few years ago, his father's mistress appeared and brought a minor illegitimate child to fight for fame. Later, he and his boyfriend What happened was discovered by his father again, and there was a lot of trouble.

Lin Qingran understood the situation of He Yi's family. He knew that He Yi was upset recently, so he comforted him: "Let's go out for a walk later, go to what you like—"

The sudden vibration interrupted the conversation between the two of them. He Yi looked at his mobile phone and frowned, and it took a while to pick it up: "... Got it, I will go back later."

Anxiously hung up the phone, he frowned and got up from the bed, picked up the coat thrown by the bed and put it on, and said, "I'll go back, there's a commotion over there again."

Lin Qingran nodded and said, "Be careful, call me if you need something."

"Okay, let's read your novel." He Yi responded casually, opened the door and went out.

Lin Qingran put down the novel, went out to the balcony to look down, watched He Yi go out the door, and slowly looked away until he could no longer see his back.

Leaning on the balcony with the wind blowing, he looked at the endless blue sea in front of him, staring absently for a long time.

Gu Wenyu's room was next to Lin Qingran's room, separated by a sky flower garden. Gu Wenyu had just finished processing the documents, and when he wanted to come out to breathe, he happened to see Lin Qingran.

He retracted his outstretched foot, leaned against the balcony door covered by the flowerbed, and looked at Lin Qingran through the gap in the flowerbed.

Lin Qingran borrowed her elbows from the railing, her hands were lowered naturally, her beautiful eyes were looking into the distance, looking at the distant horizon.

The warm sunlight accompanied by the breeze shone down slightly, printing on his fair skin, coating it with a layer of warm light.

Gu Wenyu's heart moved slightly, and suddenly beat faster.

Seven years ago when grandma was still alive, that time when he sent Lin Qingran home, in a corner of the room, he pressed Lin Qingran against the wall and kissed her softly.

The sunshine at that time was also so warm and beautiful, shining on Lin Qingran's face, it was so beautiful.

His lips were soft, he was obviously shy but still responded to him, being held in his arms, his whole body was soft and warm.

The corners of Gu Wenyu's mouth curled up slightly as he thought about it, that memory was so beautiful that he would never forget it for the rest of his life.

Through the gaps in the flowerbed, he saw Lin Qingran slowly lowering his eyelashes, that delicate face carried a hint of sadness.

It was a look that he had never seen before.

Gu Wenyu's heart twitched, and the place deep in his heart suddenly felt empty. For some reason, he suddenly felt that the warm sunlight was a bit dazzling.

The sun shone on his body, making it difficult for him to breathe like it was burning.

[...His grandma said that someone hurt him?His grandma found out about your affairs a long time ago, but she still acquiesced, but how did you treat him? ]

What He Yi said that night suddenly jumped out. He leaned against the balcony door and breathed heavily.

He lowered his eyelashes, clutching his throbbing heart, and suddenly understood why grandma would tell him something about Lin Qingran from time to time after their kiss.

Grandma would always find ways to tell him what Lin Qingran liked, what he encountered when he was a child, and what little stubbornness he had.

Every time he talked about it, he looked serious, not chatting like he used to.

It turns out... grandma had already found out about their affairs at that time, and acquiesced to him.

Before grandma passed away, she told Lin Qingran that he was finally loved by someone, and she could leave with peace of mind. At that time, how much pain must Lin Qingran have felt in his heart?

Gu Wenyu was panting heavily/hardly, the wound on his bandage-wrapped wrist was painful, and the sun shone down, scalding his wound and heart.

He tightly grasped the wound on his wrist, and the wound that had finally begun to scab was torn open, and blood oozed from the wound, soaking the white bandage.

The wound was rubbed against by the bandage, and the new tender flesh was constantly stinging. He held it tightly, and the wound was torn more severely.

The blood completely soaked the white bandage, turning it bright red. The blood slowly slid from his wrist, flowed over his arm, and fell onto the carpet drop by drop.

The author has something to say: Gong will continue to pay for the mistakes he made. He really doesn’t know how to love others. He will learn later. Some of these things are indeed misunderstood. I hope the cuties can read it slowly QWQ