imaginary rival

This time Jiang Shiyu directly bought a box of refills.

After shopping, he was not in a hurry to go home. Yan An and Ruan Yu were supposed to be talking about something just now, but he suddenly came in and interrupted them. They had no intention of continuing the chat, and Ruan Yu stood back at the counter again.

"Aren't you going back?" Yan An came out of the supermarket and said to Jiang Shiyu, "Your mother isn't home?"

"I'll be back later." Jiang Shiyu put the box of pen refills he bought into his pocket, opened his jacket and fumbled in his inner pocket for a while, and took out a pack of cigarettes, "Smoking?"

"I can't smoke." Yan An said.

"Mind if I smoke?" Jiang Shiyu changed the question.

"I don't mind," Yan An looked at Jiang Shiyu's expression, hesitated, and said to him, "How about finding a place to sit for a while?"

"Go back, it's okay," Jiang Shiyu took out the lighter with a cigarette in his mouth, "I'll go back after smoking."

Yan An glanced at him twice, but in the end he still didn't leave.

In fact, Jiang Shiyu didn't have any expression on his face, and his whole body tended to be in a flat or depressed state. Yan An didn't know if he was being overwhelmed, but he could hear that there was a trace of anger in Jiang Shiyu's tone. Silk familiar exhaustion.

It was very similar to his tone when he first came here.

"Are you really okay?" Yan An asked.

"Ah." Jiang Shiyu responded.

"Then why don't you go to my house for dinner?" Yan An said, pulling off the strap of her schoolbag, "My mom gets off work early today, so she should have cooked a lot of delicious food, are you going?"

"No," Jiang Shiyu took a puff of the cigarette, feeling that his entire lungs were filled with the smoke and swelled, and the moment he exhaled it became flattened, leaving it limp on his body like a soaked tissue Here, he paused for a while, looked at Yan An, "Go back."

"Oh, okay." Yan An couldn't say anything more, he turned and walked back to the supermarket, hesitated for a while and said to Ruan Yu who was standing at the counter, "If Qi Fang comes to block you again, you can come to us. "

"Thank you." Ruan Yu smiled.

Yan An nodded, and exited the supermarket. Before leaving, he glanced at Jiang Shiyu who was standing under the electric pole smoking a cigarette. He had a feeling that he didn't know how to describe, as if the familiarity between them was just his illusion. .

Why is it so boring.

Jiang Shiyu will suffocate himself to death sooner or later.

Yan An took out the chewing gum in his pocket and stuffed one into his mouth.

Jiang Shiyu didn't start to walk towards home until the cigarette in his hand was exhausted.

When he came out to buy a pen, his mother was packing up the materials and going back to the room. She probably didn't want to see him anymore, so she walked past him without giving him half a look.

Jiang Shiyu didn't want to quarrel with his mother at all, but he really couldn't understand what his mother was thinking and what she was doing.

Jiang Xing felt that he and his mother had left the north, and that without him as a father and husband, they would accomplish nothing and survive. Women and children had to rely on the family all the time, and he felt that they would definitely go back to him.

My mother understood Jiang Xing's thoughts, so she worked crazily. She wanted to climb to a high position and prove that she could live a good life alone. She hoped that Jiang Shiyu would also be excellent. This was originally a very inspirational and positive thing .

But there are some things that have been subtly wrong for a long time.

Jiang Shiyu leaned his head against the wall of the elevator, closed his eyes, waited for the elevator to stop, looked at the number of floors before standing up straight, and took out the key while walking out.

The moment the key was inserted into the keyhole, Jiang Shiyu didn't know what action he should take. Everything was stiff, the door was locked, and his mother was not at home, so she left again.

He put the key in his pocket, and when he pulled his hand out, he touched the refill box, and the box fell out of his pocket.

do homework.

eat.

Read a book for a while, take a shower and sleep.

These things are to be done every day, no matter how absent-mindedly they are done, they must be done.

Jiang Shiyu sat in front of the desk and was stunned for almost 10 minutes without remembering what he was going to do or which topic he was writing about. He could only hear the sound of home appliances running, which came to his ears and was infinitely heard. Zooming in, interfering with anything he does.

This time there was no phone vibration, no one in the small group yelled "My dad didn't hit me", Jiang Shiyu grabbed the phone and looked at it for a long time, clicked on Yan An's profile picture and quit, the phone turned on and then turned off Several times, hesitated.

In the end, he let out a long sigh, clenched his fingers tightly, squeezed the draft paper into a ball, squeezed it tightly, his eye sockets were sore and swollen to death, and he was almost out of breath, so he simply threw away the draft paper, took off his coat and pants and lay down on the bed , taking deep breaths to regulate emotions.

Yan An's family is very happy.

It can be seen that his parents are very enlightened people, otherwise they wouldn't have raised Yan An's silly personality.

Envy?

Jiang Shiyu pressed his arms against his eyelids, and kept swallowing, trying to swallow the sore feeling in his throat.

It's not like he's a child who can't live without his mother, but it's just too hard to feel reassured.

In the beginning, she just didn't come back for two or three days—Jiang Shiyu didn't understand what kind of company would make people work overtime twice, three days and three nights in a week—and now, she didn't know when she left, and she didn't know what Time to come back, do not know how long to go.

Don't know if I will come back.

After she and Jiang Xing divorced, she had been holding on, forcing herself to move forward and climb up the company's upper echelon, just to win her voice and let Jiang Xing see how good she is.

How long can this strong support last?

When she can't hold on anymore, what will she choose?

Will she leave here from now on, just like Jiang Xing did, leaving this place where she didn't have much affection?

The knock on the door came at this time. Jiang Shiyu moved his arms away, stared at the ceiling in a daze for a moment, almost jumped up from the bed, ran a few steps and opened the door, but the person standing outside was not Mom, it's Yan An.

"Why are you here?" Jiang Shiyu looked at him.

"Brother, I've called you more than ten times." Yan An looked at him speechlessly, "You don't even answer your calls, why don't you let me take a look, it's not time to sleep now. "

Besides, their homes were not far apart, so Yan An was willing to move the place after a trip.

"...What's the matter?" Jiang Shiyu let go of the doorknob, stood at the door and stared at him blankly.

"Normally, they have an appointment to play tomorrow." Yan An pushed him away, entered the room, and found a pair of slippers to return, "Are you going?"

Jiang Shiyu watched Yan An walk into the house, closed the door, followed behind him and said softly, "No."

"Oh," Yan An scratched his head, "Then I'll go by myself, and Xie Lanlan will go too. We made an appointment with the people from Class [-] to fight with Sun Ke and the others."

"Ah." Jiang Shiyu stared at him.

"Have you eaten yet?" Yan An walked into the kitchen, "Do you want me to cook for you? I haven't cooked for others yet, Xie Lanlan has only eaten my fried rice, you..."

"What exactly do you want to ask?" Jiang Shiyu followed him, leaning against the door frame, frowning and asking, "You don't need to find so many topics."

Yan An settled for a while, then turned around and sighed.

"Do you know that your face is particularly ugly?" Yan An looked away, looked at other places, and said in a low voice, "I was fine after school, but suddenly it just happened. I asked you and you didn't say anything."

Jiang Shiyu looked at him without saying a word.

"I know this is your privacy. If you don't want to say it, I... don't have to ask something," Yan An waved his hand. Mom was at home, but she wasn't there at all, and there was no food at home."

As he said, he opened the refrigerator door and was stunned for a moment: "You have no food at home?"

"Let's cook the noodles." Jiang Shiyu said.

"Okay," Yan An took out a few eggs from the refrigerator, "What kind of eggs do you like?"

"Huh?" Jiang Shiyu looked at him.

"Fried eggs or boiled eggs." Yan An changed the question.

"Whatever you want." Jiang Shiyu said.

Yan An nodded, took a bowl from the cupboard, cracked open the egg, was taken aback, threw the shell of the egg, and rushed into the river with the bowl in his hands, shouting: "Damn it! Double yolk eggs!"

Jiang Shiyu stared at him blankly: "... awesome."

"Damn, I haven't cracked a double-yolk egg for a long time." Yan An put down the bowl, took an egg and whipped it, "As expected of me."

Jiang Shiyu didn't answer.

Yan An got some oil, poured down the beaten eggs, and fried them until they were cooked. Stir fry them like scrambled eggs for a while, then pour some water in, boil the water and pour in the egg soup. Poured some light soy sauce and seasoning, and there were still some chili peppers at home. Yan An first filled out Jiang Shiyu's noodles, and then sprinkled some chili noodles in it. The pot of noodles immediately turned red and looked very spicy.

"Your mother isn't off work yet?" Yan An asked casually.

Jiang Shiyu held the bowl and didn't say a word. When both of them sat down at the dining table, he glanced at Yan An who had shut up and said slowly, "Let's go."

"Business trip?" Yan An looked at him.

"...I don't know," Jiang Shiyu tapped his chopsticks on the side of the bowl, "Yan An."

"Huh?" Yan An responded.

"Why do you care about me so much?" Jiang Shiyu asked.

"What nonsense are you talking about?" Yan An frowned, "I am concerned about Xiao Binghai's bad complexion, let alone you."

"Do cats have faces?" Jiang Shiyu continued to ask.

"...Ah, I don't know," Yan An was stunned by his question, "Fuck, I haven't observed it, it has always had a white face, and once I forgot to wipe its eye poo, that face looked It's a bit yellowish, but the cat's bad mood shouldn't show on his face, after all..."

Yan An paused halfway through speaking, gritted his teeth and said, "Damn it, I got off topic."

Jiang Shiyu didn't hold back, and immersed himself in the bowl for a while, not knowing why he wanted to be happy, but his eyes were sour from the steam from the hot noodles in the bowl, and his whole face was wet.

"Xiao An," Jiang Shiyu called out in a low voice, "Do you know that kind of dog that stays behind?"

"Ah." Yan An didn't know how to answer.

"Waiting at home every day, I don't know if the master will come back. Does the master not want it?" Jiang Shiyu's voice was very calm, as if he was telling a story that had nothing to do with him, "Can a dog live without its master?" ? No, it can live on its own."

"But why?" Jiang Shiyu said, "Why don't you want it?"

"Maybe," Yan An hesitated, "Is there something wrong?"

"What's the matter with her?" Jiang Shiyu suddenly raised his face, and Yan An saw that his eyes were red, "I went to their company to ask, when she told me that she was on a business trip, the front desk of their company told me , She was not scheduled to travel that week, she just didn't want to go home, she could go anywhere, but she didn't want to come back, she didn't want to see me!"

Yan An stood up, walked around the table and walked quickly to Jiang Shiyu's side.

"Why? Because I look like Jiang Xing? She will feel sick when she sees me?" Jiang Shiyu reached out to hold Yan An's hand the moment he approached, "Why? I don't know, I can't figure it out , Yan An."

"Don't think so, she might," Yan An couldn't find any words to comfort her, "Your mother might just go out to relax, why does she think you are disgusting when she looks at you, is she your mother?"

"Do you know when she will come back next time?" Jiang Shiyu firmly grasped Yan An's hand, "Do you know when she left?"

"...I don't know." Yan An said in a daze.

"I don't know." After Jiang Shiyu finished speaking, he smiled with the corners of his mouth curled up, and turned his head away the moment the tears rolled down.

Yan An was stunned for a long time, and suddenly opened his arms and hugged Jiang Shiyu very hard as if he was heroic.

I don't know if Jiang Shiyu will throw himself out by conditioned reflex.

Maybe you will step into the floor and you won't be able to pick it out.

Should Xie Lanlan bring an excavator when she comes to dig herself?

do not know.

do not care.

The moment Yan An saw Jiang Shiyu crying, his eyes became hot, and tears dripped down, just falling on the top of Jiang Shiyu's head.

"Why are you crying?" Jiang Shiyu buried his face in his stomach and asked in a muffled voice.

"How the hell do I know!" Yan An raised his hand and wiped his face vigorously, very confidently, "I just cried, what's the matter!"

Jiang Shiyu paused for a while, raised his hand to grab Yan An's clothes, and cursed in a low voice, "Stupid."