sweet kiss bitter summer

The rain continued, and the water droplets fell on the surface of the rearview mirror, diluting Liang Luoan's shadow a little bit.

Sitting in the car, Tan Chen unconsciously imitated Liang Luoan who was sitting next to him just now. Looking at the dense water stains on the car window, which piled up into traces flowing like tears, he suddenly remembered Liang Luoan's eyes when he was crying.

This made Tan Chen suddenly feel a familiar pain.

I don't know when it started, when Tan Chen saw Liang Luo'an, he always cried.

Even if it was only in Tan Chen's dream more times.

He also felt that he had made a big mistake.

Whenever he had nightmares at midnight, Tan Chen frequently dreamed of Liang Luo'an chaotically, and his wet eyes, which were exactly the same as those on rainy days, were like a deep pool of sorrow, as if only by drowning in it could he stay beside Luo'an forever.

In the dream, Liang Luo'an was always calling his name, bewildered and helpless.

Tan Chen often felt a strong emotion called regret because of this, which quickly made him lose his reason in his dreams, and impulsively wanted to tell Liang Luo'an not to break up, nor to hate him.

But he just opened his mouth in vain, as if his neck was strangled, his breathing was difficult, and he couldn't even pronounce a simple syllable.

Liang's mother stood behind Luo'an, her voice passed through Liang Luo'an's body, she looked at Tan Chen blankly, and begged him with tears: "Tan Chen, you were raised by the Liang family. Uncles and aunts know you are a good boy. I've been doing my best to love and love you.

So, for the kindness of nurturing for so many years, I beg you not to repay our kindness and let our Luoan go—" He stood outside his sister's ward, and saw Liang's mother crying and kneeling before him.

The mother, who had always been kind and gentle, grew haggard, and begged the ungrateful villain to save the poor child she had deceived and burdened.

The kindness of the dearest relatives and the love of the young are like the weights at both ends of the balance, gradually tilting with the swaying of the mind, until one side sinks and falls to death.

It's not that they are not brave enough, and it has nothing to do with shallow love. It's just that they can't be ungrateful to their benefactors, and can't be indifferent to their relatives. In the end, they become a young man with nothing, unable to keep himself or his love.

He woke up from the dream, sweating all over the muscles of his body, struggling to recall with a splitting headache, he finally bowed his head and apologized to Mama Liang in a daze.

Thus the selfish and wrong love of the villain dies, like a moth's wings thrown into an open flame, and the broken pieces turn into his crocodile's tears.

His strong pillars collapsed, and when he cried helplessly, Mama Liang also kindly comforted her once beloved child: "Right and wrong, right and wrong are extreme opposites, and some things are destined to be incompatible.

As long as the mistakes are corrected in time, life can get back on track—correct, healthy, and true love will always be encountered in the future. "

is that so?Tan Chen suffered from palpitations and painful doubts in the countless nights when he dreamed of Liang Luo'an crying.

The so-called correct, healthy, and true love, he may no longer be able to touch it, and he will no longer be able to bestow it on anyone.

His kisses are bitter.

His heart stopped in the wrong, sick, and false love with Liang Luo'an.

"Brother, where have you been?"

Tan Chen went back to the ward with crutches, pushed open the door, saw his younger sister Tan Xin standing by the window, turned his head to look at him unhappy, his inner eyes similar to Tan Chen's were dimmed due to the backlight, and he limped deeply. Qian walked back to the hospital bed, opened the lunch boxes, and placed them on the table layer by layer.

Tan Xin complained with a bit of dissatisfaction: "I've been waiting for you for a long time, and the food is going to be completely cold."

"Just walk around."

Tan Chen walked over slowly, leaned his crutches against the wall, and lifted his injured leg, which was unable to use his strength, onto the bed with great effort.

Tan Xin walked over, helped to support his ankle, lifted it up carefully, and touched the trouser leg of Tan Chen's hospital gown. His hand was wet and cold, and there were still very obvious muddy water stains on the edge.

Tan Xin put Tan Chen's feet on the bed, let go of her hands, looked up at him with some scrutiny, and asked, "The doctor won't let you go out casually.

It's still raining outside, what are you doing out there? "It just so happened that a friend came here for a medical examination. He couldn't leave because of the rain, so he asked the driver to take him home." "

Tan Chen explained calmly, picked up the chopsticks and pressed them together in the palm of his hand, took a bite of the fried cabbage in the lunch box, and said casually: "What are you doing, are you interrogating your brother as a prisoner? It's not big or small, let's eat together soon. .”

Tan Xin ignored Tan Chen's words, straightened up, and looked at Tan Chen from a slightly overlooking angle, her eyes looked a little serious, "Just ask the driver to pick up ordinary friends, you just came to the capital not long ago, how can you have any good friends... ...you don't seem to be a hospitable person all the time."

Tan Chen chewed some hard rice, and said lightly: "We have known each other for many years and are very important friends."

Tan Xin looked at Tan Chen for a while, as if realizing something, his expression was suddenly stained with resentment, and he suppressed his voice: "Is it... Liang Luo'an?" Tan Chen put down his chopsticks, and replied speciously: "You If you know enough, you don’t need to ask your brother anymore.”

"Not that I know much.

It's because apart from him, you probably won't do this for anyone else. "

Tan Xin's hands were clenched into fists, and her bloodless joints were propped on the bedside cabinet. She asked Tan Chen cruelly: "Then you two meet now, and you send him home, what's the matter? He wants to get back together with you, Want you to go back to Liang's house and be his brother again?" Tan Chen frowned and didn't speak.

Tan Xin's voice was a little trembling, as if her emotions were on the verge of collapse in an instant, she cried and questioned the silent Tan Chen: "Did you come back for him? To return to him! I know, I know! You have been with him since you were a child , You like him, so you don’t want me! Obviously I’m your real sister!” Tan Chen felt that something was wrong, and moved his body to the side of the bed eagerly, and the injured leg felt the pain of straining and tearing again due to the large range of movements. But he couldn't care about himself now, he just pulled Tan Xin in front of him, and told her softly and gently: "No, no, Xinxin, how could my brother not want you, my brother won't want you."

Tan Xin cried a lot, but she seemed to have received some effective comfort. She lay on Tan Chen's lap like a child, and grabbed Tan Chen's hospital gown with all her strength, a small piece was soaked with tears.

My sister's weird and intense emotional problems were only discovered by Tan Chen after he took her back to his side a few years ago. He also took her to see a psychiatrist, saying that it was because of the emotional regulation disorder caused by the dark traumatic memories in childhood, so he always At certain moments, for certain things, showing excessive paranoia or extremes.

The etiology is not difficult to understand.

He grew up in a neglected environment when he was young. Sometimes he had to face his drunken and violent uncle, and his weak and sad aunt.

Her leg injury was stabbed with a wine bottle by her drunken uncle, which deeply injured the nerves and muscles, leaving a sequelae of lameness.

In addition, Tan Xin also has some scars of different colors on her body. She has a strong self-esteem, but she does not cover the scars. Perhaps it is to remind Tan Chen of the time he has never participated in, and the injuries he suffered because of his absence. Pain is a debt that can never go away and is irreparable.

Tan Chen endured the severe pain in his calf, his temples were dripping with cold sweat, and he gently stroked his sister's hair and trembling back with his palm, like a wounded wolf comforting a cub.

After a long time, Tan Xin's mood calmed down slightly, her eyes were still red, and she cautiously asked Tan Chen for a promise: "You won't go back with Liang Luo'an, just leave me behind."

Tan Chen looked down at his fragile sister and shook his head, "Brother will not leave you behind."

He makes incomplete but important promises of assurance.

At the same time, he knew very well that he was subconsciously avoiding the part about Liang Luo'an.

Seven years is too long to numb many originally intense feelings, and it is enough to make many futile assumptions lose the extravagant hope and courage to continue fantasizing.

Before returning to the capital from the south, Tan Chen never thought that he would return to Liang Luo'an's life so easily.

Maybe he would have an undue fluke mentality in the instant crazily growing desire, but Tan Chen knew very well in his heart that he had no extravagant hope of going back to the past, only a little secret hope.

I want Luo'an to be a little more relaxed and happy.

But Liang Luo'an's face appeared again in his mind, it seemed that things went against his wishes, and when he faced him, he was always lost, sad, or crying.

Tan Chen is not unclear, perhaps the best way is not to get close, but he has already fallen into a dilemma.

Just like the choice that had to be made at the beginning, he can only choose one answer, but no matter what he chooses, he will definitely lose or regret it.

But now the only unstable factor is Tan Chen himself.

He tried to control himself, but it seemed that he always lost something called proportion when facing Liang Luoan, and succumbed to the instinct to approach.

This is not a good sign.

Perhaps the ashes are being revived.

The author has something to say: I'm miserable