I only like you as a paper man

"...Huh?????" You were stunned.

"Oh..." Oda didn't think so, "Do you need my help to get rid of these things?"

"No, I don't think these things are in the way, but I feel... shocking?"

"Really? This kind of thing is often received in front of the Hong Kong and Black Building."

"... Huh?????" You were stunned again, even "shocking my mother" can't accurately describe the shock you feel in your heart at the moment, "Is there such a thing???"

"Is there such a thing!?" I don't know if it was pretending, Dazai was shocked along with you, "But Odasaku, I have never seen such a thing before."

"I have dealt with them." Oda Saku replied, "The above said that the majesty must be maintained in front of the Hong Kong and Black Building."

... It is also true, it is too strange that you are obviously the mafia but you receive flowers and pennants from ordinary people! ?No matter how you think about it, logically speaking, this kind of thing should be placed at the door of the Armed Detective Agency.

There are three pennants at the gate——

In the first one, it is said that Chuya rescued two brats who were almost hit by a car when they were fighting on the road.

In the second picture, it is said that Chuya rescued the old woman who was tripped by a stone and fell to the ground.

In the third picture, it is said that Chuya rescued several junior high school students who drowned after swimming in the Huangpu River.

The corners of your mouth twitched, and you didn’t know how to describe your feelings for a while. How should I put it, this kind of thing is indeed often seen in the news... It should be said that Zhongye saved three people in one afternoon, it’s amazing. Or should I say that you are Edogawa Conan of Hong Kong and Heilongjiang?

You simply went to the store to interview Chuya who was working hard in the background.

Regarding the two brats who were hit by a car, Zhong also said the same:

"Did they treat the road as a playground!? How did their mother teach it!?"

You replied:

"Forget it, Mr. Chuya, maybe they don't have a mother, don't worry about orphans."

Regarding the old lady who tripped over a stone, the Chinese also said this:

"What's the matter with the people around!? They don't even blink when they see an old man fall! Are people in another world so ruthless!?"

You replied:

"I think Mr. Chuya is right. They are indeed ruthless... If it weren't for the frequent reports of the old man Pengci in the news."

You thought about it for a while, what would happen if Chuya was hit?

...In short, let's mourn for five seconds for those who came to Zhongye first, it's too miserable.

Regarding the drowning junior high school students, Zhong also said the same:

"I clearly saw a swimming pool nearby, why did I have to swim in the river!?" also repeated the situation at that time, "Actually, I didn't see anyone drowning, it was their companions who came to me for help... You can't just let it go, right? So I just help out...Damn it."

"What's the matter, Mr. Chuya, why are you getting more and more angry as you talk? Could it be that group of brats blamed you for being too slow in saving... This kind of thing does happen often! Good intentions are not rewarded!"

"No, those children thanked me well..." Zhong Ye answered you through gritted teeth, "But——"

Nakaya turned around sharply, and without a word, kicked Dazai who was standing in the corner with a vicious dog kick.

Too bad Dazai got out of the way.

"Why did I fish up this bandage monster who committed suicide by jumping into the river!???"

——Central Plains also sent out a soul question.

"This is what I want to ask, Chuya!? Why do you bother me when I enter the water!? I finally chose a perfect place to enter the water, and the water temperature and sunlight are just right... Why bother at this time me!"

"You bastard...! Who knew that a middle-aged uncle would get in among the drowning junior high school students!?"

"Who are you calling a middle-aged uncle, you brat! Oh, I forgot, I am indeed a middle-aged uncle in comparison with elementary school students!!"

"Dazai, do you want to die!?"

"Yeah yeah—Chuya! You're finally smart for once! I just want to die—the kind that wants to be with beautiful women!"

"Ah—? Then why didn't you see the beauty you mentioned in the Huangpu River yesterday?"

"..." Dazai was silent for three seconds, then spread his hands and said, "The river is too fast, and the beauty who died in love with me was swept away!"

"...I think we should call the police." You who stood by said to Oda like this.

"You are right, call the police first." Oda replied to you.

Of course, you all know that Dazai is just talking about it.

So you just talked about it, and didn't call 110.

Dazai still gave you face.

He warmly received the two girls who made an appointment with you yesterday to come to the store to watch Osamu Dazai's "coser", which can be said to be the real performances.

He also sold a lot of milk tea, and he was finally able to say his famous lines——

"Oh! Beautiful ladies, are you willing to die for love with me?" ←Because the girls in front of me are plural, I had to add "we", which made it sound even more wrong.

"I will, I will!"

"I can!"

"I also can--"

"Of course I'd like to—yeah—or rather, it's my lifelong dream!"

Such voices come and go.

Just when Dazai was really about to take the girls to the river (actually it was just acting, he still has a little conscience, probably.), the girls hugged each other two by two and shouted, "My life is perfect!" !!!", thanked Dazai together, and left with milk tea.

"Huh?" Tuliu Dazai stayed where he was.

"What are you 'hey'!" You mercilessly stood on tiptoe and patted Dazai's shoulder, "Do you think they really want to die with you!? Of course it's just sex!"

"...Tch." Dazai pouted, very dissatisfied, "Everyone is just talking, no one really likes me—"

...If I really like you, I might not necessarily die with you, but I might try to persuade you to live together, right?

You think so.

Oda Sakunosuke was probably the most comfortable of all present.

Compared with the fanatical fans, Oda's fans are relatively quieter for some reason, they are not noisy, they just have some unnutritious conversations with Oda.

For example--

"I had an egg roll this morning. It was very delicious. I really want to give Mr. Oda a taste."

"If you like it, you can keep it for yourself and eat more?"

"I want to eat curry with Oda-san."

"...I'll consider adding it to the menu."

some type of.

At most, just tell him "I love you forever!", "I love you forever" and so on.

"Thank you, I hope you can love yourself like this."

——It is said that he learned this answer from a certain novel.

..............................

"Speaking of which, what about Mr. Ranpo?"

After a few hours, you suddenly find that Luanbu, who was sitting in the corner and opened a detective corner, has disappeared.

Because the paper people who travel back and forth will change every day, and there are so many people that you can hardly remember who is still in this world these days.

"Ah, he was taken away by the police." The busy Qing Guang replied to you.

"What!? Why!??? Could it be that he had a dispute with a customer and was taken for a record...isn't that good!?"

"No, please rest assured, my Lord, I, Hasebe, will never let this happen." Hasebe explained to you, "It is said that the police encountered a difficult incident and happened to hear about it. There is a famous detective here, so I came to ask for help with the mentality of giving it a try."

"Huh...?" Since this answer is too...unspeakable, you can't find the right words to express your inner doubts for a while, "Mr. Ranpo agreed?? The other world can't use powers He should know too!?"

"He said—" Candlestick cut the topic, "The problems in the other world are too childish, and they can be easily solved even without supernatural powers, so I happily went to help."

"...I know, the reward must be very generous, right? For example... a hundred boxes of Shiroi Koibito, a different world-limited Hokkaido-limited product."

"As expected of the Lord!" Hasebe applauded for you.

"Don't the police feel that something is wrong? The reward is only snacks-this setting is too two-dimensional!"

"The police said...why is he called Ranpo even though his surname is Edogawa?"

Hasebe imitated the tone of the little policeman.

"...Okay, don't talk about it anymore." You laughed awkwardly, "I already know, this is definitely a die-hard fan of Detective Conan - if you can't solve the case by yourself, you can find a detective to solve it, and you can do it , I will take the salary!"

So at dinner, you led everyone to watch the theatrical version of Detective Conan-Zero's executor.

"Why can he drive the car to the wrong direction on the train!? Will Newton cry!?"

"...Mr. Nakaya, do you know that you are the only one here who is not qualified to say 'Newton will cry', okay!? By the way, you still know Newton!?"

"Ah? Is this common sense?"

"!? Abilities don't tell me common sense, please!"

"Based on this—" Dazai opened his index finger and pressed his chin against his thumb and index fingertips, "I am the man who can bring the world back on track!"

"...I think so, Mr. Dazai." You chewed the curry rice, swallowed it calmly and continued, "If you really have the ability of Chuya, you will probably blow up the earth directly and let women all over the world and you To be buried together...no, it's a martyrdom."

"Oh, this is such a good idea, as expected of Chacha!"

"...Doesn't that mean we all have to get in!?"

"Wow, let's forget about it... I really don't want to die for love without distinction!"

"Indiscriminate death... Mr. Dazai, you have invented a new word." Dun said.

"As expected of Mr. Dazai, even vocabulary..." Akutagawa said.

"...Just as long as you are happy." You muttered, then looked at Sakunosuke Oda who was sitting next to him silently eating curry rice while watching animation, "Mr. Oda, is curry to your liking?"

"Oh...it's pretty good."

"If you have any comments, you can talk to Candlestick at any time! He is my special cook!"

Oda looked at Candekiri, who smiled and said "The Lord has won the prize", and thought to himself——

No matter how you look at it, it has nothing to do with the chef, right?

Could it be that this person is actually a womanizer?

The author has something to say:

Candlestick cut: ? ? ?Why did I suddenly get hurt?

Chacha: ...What if Mr. Chuya is invited to select the "Top Ten People Who Moved China"! ?No passport! ! !

Chuya: Do not allow foreigners to participate in this kind of selection! ! !