Sea King's Self-cultivation

What happened in the "book" is neither the past nor the future, nor even a parallel world. What it represents is just one of countless possibilities. Since it is a "possibility", it means that things have countless possibilities The rapid development also means that there are countless opportunities to start over.

After that, he probably did it a few thousand times—not to show the number of virtual fingers, but literally thousands of times.In the worlds that come again and again, the development of some worlds is almost the same as that of the real world, while others are more wonderful. In most possible worlds, Shimizu Xing will become his wife, and in some possibilities, he will become his lover. In other worlds, Shimizu Xing would actually become a cadre of the port mafia just like he was in his youth, and what's more, he would become his enemy.

No matter which possibility, Shimizu Xing will fall in love with him.

And in either case, she will die.

Sometimes death is suicide, sometimes homicide, and in rare cases accident and disease.

Even after learning the lessons from the previous world, and avoiding this method of death in the next world, she would unexpectedly die in another way.Even if "suicide" and "homicide" have no chance to happen to her, she will still die of disease and accident.

Dozens of times once, twice, can still be explained by "few times" and "wrong method", but the death that cannot be saved hundreds of times or thousands of times, no matter what, I can no longer continue to deceive myself and others.

The death of Qingshui Xing is the conclusion of this world.

Since it is a conclusion, how can it be changed?

So no matter in which possibility, death is her only destination.

[Actually, you have already realized this fact when you came back for the third time, right?Why try so many times in vain? 】

yeah, why?

Qingshui Xing is dead, and all the power of "Book" has been obtained, no matter what happened before, it should be written off.From the beginning to the end, his purpose is just to get the "book", to protect this world that allows Oda Saku to write novels well, isn't it?

Just let her sleep peacefully, isn't this what she is after?

Why obsess over her death?

Hundreds of times and thousands of times, he watched her die in front of him again and again, watched her stop breathing again and again, watched her life slowly go by again and again...why?

What is it for?

Thoughts seem to slow down a bit.

He closed his eyes.

[Every restart is a huge drain on the spirit, you can no longer restart endlessly. 】

Dazai directly ignored the "book"'s advice.

【Restart——】

The restart order was issued, and the world fell apart in an instant, and then reorganized in an instant.

After a slight dizziness, he opened his eyes.

Like an ordinary office, there are two neat rows of mahogany tables and chairs. There are a few pots of vigorous green plants in the corner, surrounded by irregularly shaped windows, and the strong aroma of coffee can be faintly smelled, which seems to be coming from under the windows. floated up.

He leaned back in a chair, and a large pile of documents was forcefully placed on the desk in front of him.

The visitor was obviously dissatisfied with his lazy attitude for a long time, and said in a bad tone: "Your work yesterday. Don't think that you can still miss it today!"

Osamu Dazai raised his eyes: "Kunikida...kun?"

Kunikida Doppo, member of the Armed Detective Agency.

In the world line where he defected from Hong Kong when he was a cadre and joined the Armed Detective Agency, Kunikida Doppo would most likely appear as his partner.

It seems that this world line is the world line in which Oda Saku is dead and he defected to Hong Kong | Hei joined the Armed Detective Agency.

Knowing his situation, Osamu Dazai is very familiar with pretending to be himself on another world line. He pushed away the documents piled up in front of him, lay down on the table, and lazily complained: "No. Kunikida-kun has time Just tidy it up for me, why don’t you help me do it together by the way.”

"Hey! You bastard—"

Kunikida's forehead has blue veins looming.

The door of the Armed Detective Agency was pushed open.

"Good morning everyone."

"Good morning, Oda-kun."

"Today is also stepping on the spot, Oda-kun!"

"Good morning! Oda-kun!"

With the arrival of the red-haired young man, there were fragmented greetings in the office, and the arrival of the last member meant that the Armed Detective Agency had officially started a new day.

The black-haired young man was slightly startled: "...Oda Zuku?"

"Good morning, Dazai." Oda Sakunosuke walked to his seat, and conveniently put something on Dazai's table, "Your book was dropped in the dining room at the dinner last time, and the boss asked me to bring it for you. "

"...Ah, thanks."

He took the book calmly, looked at Odasaku and Kunikida who were already talking beside him, and suddenly felt a strong sense of absurdity in his heart.

When he came into contact with "books" back then, his own memories of the parallel world flooded into his mind.In another world, he and Sakunosuke Oda were close friends during the Port Mafia period. Later, Oda Sakunosuke died in the battle with the Mimic leader. Therefore, Dazai Osamu in the parallel world decided to leave the Port Mafia. |The party joins the Armed Detective Agency.

In his own world, Oda Sakunosuke joined the Armed Detective Agency and lived well without encountering a confrontation with Mimic, while he was the leader of the port mafia. The two camps were naturally opposed.Although he has done a lot for Odasaku, Odasaku didn't know him, and never regarded him as a friend. They were enemies until the death.

The world of Osamu Dazai in the "book" has been restarted thousands of times. If he is a member of the Armed Detective Agency, it means that Oda Saku is dead. If he is a member of the Port Mafia | Hand | 80.00% chance is his enemy, 23% chance is an irrelevant stranger, and the remaining [-]% is his friend, Oda who will surely die at the age of [-] do.

Dazai never thought of the possibility that they could work together in the Armed Detective Agency.

As colleagues, as friends.

"Oh yes, Odasaku..."

He picked up the topic of chatting, and nonchalantly brought the topic to Hong Kong|Black Times, and in a few words, he got information about this world from a few people.

What caused the Mimic organization to be regarded as a "traitor" by its own country and exiled to Japan did not happen, and naturally there was no confrontation between the port mafia|hand|party and China.The incident in which Hong Kong Black obtained a "power permit" was planned by Dazai Osamu. After the incident, he and Oda Sakunosuke left the Port Black | Hand | Party together. After two years of whitewashing, the two joined together Armed detective agency, Mori Ogai only symbolically chased and killed the traitor, and then stopped pursuing it.

In this world line, Mimic's soldiers were not abandoned by their motherland, Odasaku did not die, and Mr. Mori did not die either. The children adopted by Odasaku were all growing up well, and they even escaped from the port smoothly. The Black|Hand|Party joined the Armed Detective Agency together.

No one died, no tragedy happened, everything he wanted to do had good results, and he was even able to continue working with Oda Saku as friends.

It's all, so beautiful.

It's almost like the ending of Happyend, all the sad things didn't happen, and everything is moving in the best direction.It's like a sitcom where no one dies and no one disappears, set in Yokohama, and everyone is an actor who never leaves.

But... what about Qingshui Xing?

Hearing this name, there was a moment of silence in the Armed Detective Agency, as if the pause button was pressed, and soon it boiled again.

"Dazai, haven't you given up yet? Last time you invited a little girl to jump into the river to die in love, didn't you get rejected mercilessly!"

"Don't keep harassing people! I don't want the next time the police station will take you!"

"But Ms. Xing is indeed very cute, it's understandable that Dazai-kun likes it."

……

According to the rumors of the members of the Armed Detective Agency, he pieced together the intersection of himself and Shimizu Xing.

In this world line, Shimizu Xing still works in a coffee shop, but her life doesn't seem to be embarrassing.Osamu Dazai met her while drinking coffee in a coffee shop with his colleagues. It is said that he directly invited the other party to die in love with himself, but was mercilessly rejected.

Panicked, Xing Xing was so frightened that she almost called the police.

This has also become a topic of daily ridicule for members of the Armed Detective Agency.

Meet by chance, casual acquaintance.

These eight words should be enough to summarize the relationship between Dazai Osamu and Shimizu Xing.

In this world, the crucial event of "entering the water to save people" did not happen between them.

But it doesn't matter, it's still too late to make contact.

Since everything in this world is developing in a good direction, maybe Shimizu Xing in this world line will not die?

Maybe they will have a happy ending.

This is what he thought before stepping into the coffee shop.

He became friends with her easily, but then, things didn't seem to happen as he expected.

For date invitations such as eating and watching movies with only two people, she refused all of them, euphemistically but firmly.She doesn't resent his approach, but she will never let him get too close to cross the safety line.She is always sincere, soft, friendly, and caring to him, but that's all, limited to the concern among friends.

In the countless world lines that I have experienced before, it is a certainty that Shimizu Xing will fall in love with him, just like her death, it is all destined, she is destined to fall in love with him, just like playing a game, this is the foundation Setting, he never thought that he would be stuck in the step of basic setting.

But sometimes love is so subtle and unreasonable, it can happen without warning, and it can also disappear without mercy. The same people meet at different times, and they may change from lovers to enemies, not to mention they Is there more than just time?

Not loving is not loving, often there are not so many reasons and excuses.

It's okay, that's fine.He thought, even if he wants to get the rest of the "books", the only way to go is love and marriage. There is nothing wrong with keeping the status of friends like this. At least she is still alive now, and Oda Saku is still alive. Everyone is moving towards the established destiny of Happyend, and there is nothing better than now.

He thought so.

At first, he did think so.

However, not long after, he learned that Shimizu Xing was about to get married.

This matter is a bit ironic, because her marriage partner turned out to be his former partner, Nakahara Chuya.

He couldn't forget his stunned mood at that moment.

"How...you know Zhongye?"

"Maybe it's fate?" Xingxing thought for a while, "I don't seem to have told Mr. Dazai that I owed a loan shark before. I dropped out of school and went to work when I was 16. The debt collection organization wanted to force me to go to the club to pay back the money. They thought it would be quicker to get money that way...Fortunately, I met Mr. Chuya at that time, and he saved me. It has been two years since we met."

It turned out that in this world line, the person who replaced him in protecting her was Chuya.

On the day of the wedding, she held Chuya's hand and smiled so hard that her eyes curled into small crescents.She acted coquettishly with him, talked to him, and smiled at him. The handsome orange-haired young man looked at her with an undisguised smile in his eyes.Flower petals sprinkled all over the sky, falling on her snow-white and holy wedding dress, everything was as beautiful as a dream.He watched them take oaths, watched them exchange rings. After the tedious process, the priest presiding over the wedding finally announced that the groom could kiss the bride. Nakahara put his arms around her waist and lifted her veil. Li smiled and kissed her lips, cherishing and cherishing.

The guests laughed and laughed, and the opened bottles of champagne were sprayed in the air, like champagne fountains, and the released white pigeons hovered in the air, refusing to leave for a long time.

Just like everyone around him, Dazai also had a faint smile on his lips, but his eyes were like the sea in the middle of the night, unable to reflect any light.

If he hadn't seen this scene, he could continue to deceive himself, but everything in front of him was too familiar, dazzlingly familiar.

The way she talked to Zhongya, the way she acted like a baby, and the way she smiled, all clearly expressed the meaning of "I like you".He has no way to deceive himself here, because he is too familiar with her every move, because she used to talk to him, act like a baby with him, and smile at him in the same gesture.

That is Qing Shui Xing's attitude towards the person he likes, he knows it all too well.

In this world line, she really fell in love with Chuya.

In fact, there shouldn't be any uncomfortable emotions, should it?

This world is too good to be true compared to all other worlds.Odasaku did not die, and he did not become enemies with him. Not only did they leave Hongkong|Black smoothly, they could even continue to work together in the armed detective agency. Even Shimizu Xing was still alive and well, and no tragedy happened... What regrets?What is there to be dissatisfied with?He obviously doesn't love her, doesn't he?He obviously just wanted her to survive, didn't he?Now that she is alive, so happy and so happy... that's enough, isn't this what he wants to see?

He has fulfilled his wish, seeking for benevolence and gaining benevolence, everything could not be more perfect——

But why is there no joy in his heart, he just feels like he is in the abyss and purgatory where the sun cannot shine?

Why care about her marrying someone else?

Getting close to her is for the "book", love and marriage are all for the "book", and the first meeting is also for the "book", so as long as you get the "book", it will be fine, as long as she doesn't die——

Why should it matter who she married?

Why should you care so much?

why would--

so painful?

The facts are so obvious, as long as a smart person like Osamu Dazai discards the cover of self-deception, the answer will be clear at a glance.

He finally understood why.

But Shimizu Xing was already dead.

Death is the most decisive and irreversible thing in this world. Only then did he belatedly realize that, in fact, whether he loves her or not, it doesn't matter to her anymore.

It doesn't matter anymore.

She is dead.