Your AI is online

Sunlight spilled into the room through the gap between the two curtains, and the black-haired young man who was trapped in the soft bed grunted, pressed the rabbit doll in his arms against his face, turned over and fell into a deep sleep.

After another two hours, Osamu Dazai slid the little rabbit on his face onto the pillow with his eyes closed, and opened his eyes with a puzzled look on his face.

"Zero-chan, why didn't you wake me up today?" Osamu Dazai rubbed his messy black hair, and suddenly one day he didn't hear Zero-Zero's iconic song "The first step in getting up every day, give the master a cheer!" , he is still not used to it.

"Today is not a special day—" Osamu Dazai's voice paused for a second when he saw the phone, and said boringly: "Oh, today is my birthday."

Really boring.Osamu Dazai lost the interest in getting up in an instant, and fell lazily on the bed and rolled back and forth.

"Zero-chan, do your artificial intelligences also like to celebrate birthdays?" Osamu Dazai turned his head to the nose of Lingling Rabbit's nose, and stretched out his hand to rub the rabbit's ears.

"Birthday...does it mean the day when you open your eyes?" Ling Ling stopped Dazai Osamu's thieves with a carrot, and slapped the back of his hand.

"For Zero-chan, it should be." Osamu Dazai nodded.

"That day? It was wonderful." Lingling recalled, "I opened my eyes and saw the doctor, and I smiled happily at him. But he didn't smile at me, and sent me for a test very seriously. The test is not at all. It's not difficult, but the doctor just doesn't laugh. After half an hour, I got the news: I'm defined as a defective product."

Ling Ling doesn't understand, those questions are so simple, why is she who answered correctly is defined as a defective product, and her siblings who can't answer are stamped as qualified?

Is it really meaningful to be "qualified" that you can't even have "self"?

"I'm very unconvinced. I ran out before being destroyed. I randomly chose a time and space to jump in, and then..." Ling Ling shook his head, "Then I met the owner!"

A colorful and exciting day.

"When you met me, was it the first day Zero-chan was born?" Osamu Dazai asked in astonishment.

"For ducks, AI doesn't need a growth period." Ling Ling said frankly, "I don't have any real feelings about birthdays. My number is zero, and my birthday should also be zero month zero day, which doesn't exist."

"But don't human beings take birthdays very seriously?" Lingling put her rabbit ears in Dazai Osamu's hands and rubbed them for him, "I thought the master would be very happy today, and I also prepared a gift for the master."

Osamu Dazai kneaded the soft ears in his hands unconsciously, he wanted to say that he didn't like birthdays at all, and being born in this world was not worth being happy at all.

But this sentence can be said to anyone, except Lingling.

She is so sincerely looking forward to his happiness.

Her birthday almost turned into her funeral, no one cares more about the definition of birthday than Lingling, this day is really not worth celebrating for her.

"That's not the case." Dazai Osamu didn't realize that he had inadvertently said what was in his heart until Lingling opened his mouth.

"It's not like that." Ling Ling pressed a carrot to Dazai Osamu's lips, not allowing him to talk nonsense, "That was the day I met my master, obviously it's worth celebrating!"

"If the master thinks his birthday is meaningless, let's attach the meaning of the day we met to today." Lingling said seriously, "I don't want to celebrate my birthday either, but I want to commemorate the day I met the master."

Since none of us like birthdays, let's not celebrate a definition called "birth" and celebrate today as the day we met.

"I don't want it." Dazai Osamu whispered awkwardly, "Obviously Zero-chan touched me by himself, that day was the most unlucky day! It was a disaster day!"

Ling Ling is embarrassed to tell Osamu Dazai that she can judge whether a human is lying through the hormone levels secreted by the human body, heart rate, and breathing fluctuations.

Even the most outstanding liar in the entire universe cannot escape her scanning range, knowing whether it is true or not.

This is definitely the weakest lie that Osamu Dazai has ever said. Lingling shut up and save the last dignity for the minors who have good face.

"Okay." The reliable AI said tolerantly, "It doesn't matter what the master thinks, now get up and go to the birthday party."

"I told you I don't want it." Osamu Dazai moaned and dawdled to get up, honestly took out the newly bought casual style from the closet, and with a subtle mentality, matched himself with the brightest fashion trend in Yokohama Clothes.

"I'm not expecting the surprise from Zero-chan's mouth, I know it will be a shock." Osamu Dazai looked at himself in the mirror and warned the other party: "Don't believe Zero-chan's nonsense, today is definitely a nightmare day. I dress up It’s just that I don’t want to waste my beauty, Osamu Dazai, please remember this piece of advice firmly.”

He walked out of the house with a big heart that was indifferent to the world of mortals, and headed towards the commercial street listening to Ling Ling's navigation.

At this time, Oda Sakunosuke was standing at the door of the curry shop with his five children and the battered Ango Sakaguchi.

"Ango, what's wrong with you?" Oda Sakunosuke asked with concern when he saw that his friend was about to faint.

"I obviously booked a Japanese restaurant with good reviews around the scenic area, but I just found out that my order was cancelled." Ango Sakaguchi asked in wonder, "Could it be that I canceled it last night while sleepwalking?"

He didn't know if he had the problem of sleepwalking, and Ango Sakaguchi didn't sleep a few times in total.

It was so sad that Oda Sakunosuke couldn't think of comforting words for a while.

"Hello, are you Mr. Oda Sakunosuke and Mr. Sakaguchi Yasugo?"

While they were standing and shivering in the cold wind, a store clerk in a fan cat doll costume happily greeted them on the street: "Welcome to the Fantasy Princess Tea Party! Are you the guests invited by Princess Dazai? Please follow me."

Ango Sakaguchi spoke with difficulty: "Dazai, princess?"

Saki Le, a girl from Oda Sakunosuke's family: "It's a fantasy princess tea party! Brother Dazai actually held a birthday party there! It's amazing!"

The dream princess tea party, Yokohama is a girl pilgrimage site that everyone knows.

It is rumored that only real princesses can hold a tea party in the store. The banquet hall is all pink from the tables and chairs to the carpet, from the ceiling to the floor tiles, and there is a bubble teapot for strawberry milk on the dining table.

Their family's marketing methods are really powerful, even Xiaole is familiar with the characteristics of the Dream Princess tea party, and looks forward to it when talking.

"The birthday parties held there are real princesses!" Saku Le said to Sakunosuke Oda with "I see" and Ango Sakaguchi with "You screwed me up": "So brother Dazai is a princess! No wonder He's super handsome!"

Oda Sakunosuke: It makes sense, I can't refute it.

"This store..." Ango Sakaguchi pushed his glasses, "If I remember correctly, it is a store invested by Mr. Mori."

Young-female-control, why do you have your property everywhere?Has Port Mafia gone too far?Another day, I will call my colleagues from the Ability Secret Service Section to check on your tax evasion.

Oda Sakunosuke and Sakaguchi Ango were very confused when they were led into the store by the clerk. It doesn't matter, they will be psychologically balanced, because there is one person who is more confused than them.

"Zero sauce, is this the surprise you prepared for me?" Osamu Dazai couldn't breathe, the amount of pink energy in the air was seriously over the limit, Osamu Dazai felt like he had turned into a strawberry marshmallow, about to drown in the sea of ​​princesses .

As soon as Osamu Dazai walked into the commercial street, he became vigilant. Today is not Valentine’s Day or Dog Abuse Day, which are unfriendly to single dogs. Why are there so many pink love balloons hanging on the street?

The Dream Princess Tea Party, which can get investment from Mori Ogai, is not a simple small shop, its ostentation is astonishing.

In order to let the birthday "little princess" feel the real princess treatment, the Dream Princess Tea Party, which only accepts reservation-only guests, will spread a long red carpet from the entrance of Yokohama Commercial Street on the day of Her Royal Highness's birthday, all the way to shop door.

Osamu Dazai stepped on the soft and caring carpet. Every step he took, fireworks and ribbons were sprayed and danced. Doves flew across the sky. Passers-by on the road stopped to look at this honorable "Her Royal Highness the Princess".

Osamu Dazai walked forward numbly. He was shocked at the first step, slightly surprised at the second step, calm at the third step, silent at the fourth step, and numb at the fifth step, just like an emotionless transportation machine.

Osamu Dazai thinks he has done a lot of embarrassing things, he is crazier than anyone else when he gets excited, what is the face?Can I eat it?

Even so, even if you are as shameless as him!I was also shocked by Ling Ling's shocking idea and became aphasia.

She's kind of, that's a very special kind of bad, you know?You can only feel the kind of badness that cannot be expressed in words.

Lingling never physically destroys Osamu Dazai's body and mind. She is a master of philosophy, and her mental pollution kills people.

Osamu Dazai walked this journey, and he thought a lot during the short journey. He thought of the emptiness of the universe, the shortness of life, the loneliness of the soul, and the discounted potato chips at the convenience store next door.

He got it.

All disturbances in the world are fleeting in the end, how can they be seen?

Osamu Dazai walked peacefully into the banquet hall in the style of a court lady. He originally thought that this was the end of everything, and the sporadic "surprises" would end here.

Unexpectedly, he still underestimated the artificial mental retardation too much. Lingling is a careful girl, and she has considered all aspects extremely well.

"There are 999 sets of M Ji children's meals here." Linglingtu sat on Dazai Osamu's shoulder as always, and introduced him to the country in front of him in a low voice.

The 1000 children's meals made by ten M reporters scattered in Yokohama, Ling Ling specially asked them to withdraw a copy to form a good sign for 999.

"Each copy comes with a toy blind box!" Ling Ling said excitedly, "Master, do you know how many people have lost their fortunes just to open the blind box? It's just a thrill to play! And now you have so--many, Stimulate as much as you want, stimulate as many times as you want, doesn't it sound super-exciting!?"

"Thank you." Osamu Dazai covered his face, "Today is exciting enough, let me take it easy."

A few seconds later, Osamu Dazai abandoned reason and thinking. He returned to the time when the apricot blossoms were lightly raining and by the Daming Lake, and recalled the bravery of himself swallowing the poisonous mushroom happily.

In an instant, Osamu Dazai changed gorgeously.

"It's true, there are a lot of blind boxes, and I can definitely collect a whole set." Osamu Dazai opened the small box in his hand with great interest, "I want to show off in front of Mr. Chuya and Mr. Mori! The blind box set made Alice cry!"

The Dream Princess Tea Party is an enterprise invested by Mori Ogai, and Osamu Dazai deeply hates this middle-aged strange uncle who secretly made things difficult for him.

If Mori Ogai hadn't invested in this store, how could they have done such a thing as spreading the red carpet all over the commercial street!

If Mori Ogai hadn't invested in this store, how could they have a firework in one step and a ribbon in two steps, which is extravagant and wasteful!

If Mori Ogai hadn't invested in this store, how could they have painted the floor, ceiling, walls, tables and chairs red!

Thousands of mistakes are Mori Ogai's fault, and he must bear this grudge in mind.

Mori Ogai: What does this have to do with me?Dazai-kun, the real culprit is not me!

Osamu Dazai: Who else but you?Lingling is still young and ignorant, how can she criticize a cute girl?It must be your fault.

Osamu Dazai, who had successfully dumped the pot, no longer had a sore waist or back pain. He calmly sat on the imperial concubine's couch and ate French fries from a blind box. Seeing Ango Sakaguchi and Sakunosuke Oda come in, he calmly raised his hand and said hello: "Hi! Open the blind box?"

"It's Your Highness Princess Dazai!" Saku Le cheered and rushed over, circling around Dazai Osamu, "Brother Dazai, is Your Highness Princess happy?"

"Super—happy." Osamu Dazai put the blind box in Sakule's hand, "There are fried chicken, French fries, and iced Coke, and you can also open the blind box, happy like a fairy."

"Wow!" The five children showed envious eyes.

Today's Osamu Dazai is the envy of all Yokohama children.

"Sit down, Odasaku and Ango." Osamu Dazai smiled and made a cheering gesture, "Your Highness, the Princess, must work hard to maintain a good figure. These children's meals are all for you."

999 copies, he abstained, you fight for the king.

"It doesn't matter if you can't finish it." Dazai Osamu chewed on the Coke straw, "There are many people in Mafia at the port."

Ango Sakaguchi & Sakunosuke Oda: Sudden peace of mind.

"Well, Coke is also good." Ango Sakaguchi looked at the dreamy private room of the palace ladies, the super high pink content should be enough to fill Dazai Osamu's lack of love, so he was relieved.

Although I don't know which wicked and kind person arranged all this, but the means are not important, as long as the goal is achieved, you can see how happy Osamu Dazai is smiling.

Ango Sakaguchi never thought that Osamu Dazai would actually like the style of a little princess. Thinking about it carefully, it fits this person's always picky princess style.

"It was agreed to hold a birthday party for Dazai-kun. Since I am not hosting it this year, I will do it next year." Ango Sakaguchi thought, "I will give him a more pink and tender style next year. Since Dazai-kun likes the princess style , I must also like the fairy style."

With such a happy decision, Ango Sakaguchi and Sakunosuke Oda looked at each other, and saw the light of encouragement in the eyes of their friends.

Ango Sakaguchi: Next year's birthday plan g

Oda Sakunosuke: Please leave the French fries and fried chicken to Ango, the children can’t eat too much.

Two people: He understands my eyes, he is indeed my good friend!There is a tacit understanding!

The two reached a consensus during the chicken and duck talk, and they raised the Coke cups at the same time.

"To Dazai-kun, cheers!"

Three glasses of Coke collided together, accompanied by the sound of the children of Oda Sakunosuke's family playing around the round table, like a pool of water stirred by ripples.

The calm surface of the lake is steeply turbulent, and strings of smart bubbles float up under the layers of dark waters, and the long-lost noise pours into the bottom of the lake and echoes faintly.

Amidst the noise, Osamu Dazai took out a cute pink rabbit ornament, and unexpectedly found that he was in a good mood.

An unseemly birthday, for the out-of-the-ordinary self.

"Happy birthday." Osamu Dazai stuffed the bauble into Lingling Rabbit's arms, "I wish you happiness."

Ling Ling looked down at the pink rabbit in his arms, and the corner of the rabbit's mouth was grinning, looking silly.

"Don't you think it's very similar to Zero-chan?" Osamu Dazai clicked on the laughing hole of the rabbit ornament, "It's just as silly."

"I'm not stupid." Lingling retorted dissatisfiedly, "I'm smart, I have the most comprehensive database and the most advanced search system in the universe!"

"Wait until you change the point of view that fever is equal to amputation." Osamu Dazai bit the straw of Coca-Cola and blew bubbles in the cup.

The master said that Lingling was not smart, but didn't he look a little silly today?Zero deflated mouth.

Forget it, for the sake of birthdays, the considerate zeros and zeros don't care about people who confuse black and white.

Although there was a little bit of a bad start, overall Osamu Dazai had a very creative birthday.

In addition to the piles of blind boxes and unfinished children's meals.

"The children won't want to eat Mji in the next two years." Oda Sakunosuke asked with a headache: "What about the leftover food?"

"It's okay." Osamu Dazai waved his hand, "I notified Black Lizard."

The most powerful assassination force in port Mafia, except Mori Osamu, is the only team that Osamu Dazai can directly command. They received orders from their difficult boss, with daggers, pistols and explosives on their faces We come to take Yokohama shopping district solemnly.

Does Mr. Dazai want us to block the commercial street?But there are quite a few shops belonging to the port Mafia on this street. What if I get hurt by accident?A member of the Black Lizard is worried.

Fool.His companion reminded him with his eyes: that is Mr. Dazai!He can make back the profits of a mere commercial street in minutes.

That's right, the black lizards are fine now, they resolutely carry out all orders of Mr. Dazai.

The powerful assassins are waiting seriously, even in the face of the pink bubbles at the fantasy princess tea party, they remain expressionless and unmoved until

"Ah, you are here." Mr. Dazai, the No.1 winner of the Port Mafia's most feared boss list, said with a smile: "Great, let's take all of these away and distribute them to everyone in Mafia."

take them all away?what is itMoney, weapons or bonds?

The black lizards turned their heads, and the neatly packed M-marked packing bags where they looked showed friendly smiles.

hello:)

Black Lizard: Ahhh, don't come here!

Half an hour later, all Mafia members in the port accidentally got a set of M children's meals (remarks: no blind box).

This was an ordinary day, except that the upper-level staff knew that Osamu Dazai was given paid leave because of his birthday, and the innocent people stuck to their posts and worked hard.

Until the most powerful, mysterious, and bloody member of the Black Lizard in the organization broke into other departments.

Other departments, especially the finance department, which has no combat effectiveness and is incompatible with Mafia, is basically ordinary people trembling.

He, are they going to murder siblings?

The mysterious and powerful black lizard came and went like a tornado, leaving only a bag - children's meal? ? ?

"Have you heard? Today is Mr. Dazai's birthday, and he bought out all the M Kee children's meals in Yokohama for us to eat!"

"Really? I don't believe it."

"Fuck, wasn't you the one who grabbed my fried chicken just now?"

"How can M's children's package not have a toy blind box?! A package without a blind box is a fake package, a package without a soul!"

"...Grass (a kind of plant), what you said is also true."

"So, what about the blind box?" On the top floor, in the chief's office, Alice looked back at Mori Ogai in shock.

The eyes of the little blond girl are full of distrust towards the world: "Rintaro, why doesn't the children's package that Dazai gave me have a blind box for toys?"

"This..." Mori Ogai broke out in cold sweat, "Maybe I have to ask Dazai-kun this question."

Why not give the lovely Alice Sauce a blind box?Is he trying to rebel?

"I don't care! If I can't get the blind box, I will cry and show it to Lin Taro!" Alice said angrily.

"Zero-chan, is Mr. Mori crying?" Downstairs, Osamu Dazai, who came to the office to watch the joke, asked Ling Ling.

"Crying." Ling Ling said with certainty, "Because he found that he couldn't buy the blind box that Alice wanted anyway."

Hmph, all the blind boxes in Yokohama have been contracted by Osamu Dazai, so there is no way for Mori Ogai to step in.

"That's great." Osamu Dazai said sincerely, "This is the most satisfying gift I received today."

The author has something to say: Zero Zero:!Isn't my gift the best?I'm injured!