Eros kisses Psyche

"I……"

Xu Budie opened his mouth with difficulty, his throat felt like a weight was falling, the suppressed bitterness, the smell of gunpowder that had not erupted in time and was forced to die down still lingered on the root of his tongue, but was washed away by a trance sweetness.A few steps away, soft sunlight, a position beside him.

"What's the matter?" Cheng Zhu noticed his sour orange-like face, but he misunderstood, "Why don't you be so touched, come on, let me find some inspiration for you, I remember there is still a bottle of red wine with a good vintage ...Where did I put the corkscrew..."

He couldn't move at all during this process, and he didn't wake up until Lao Cheng pressed his wine glass against his face: "Why, you have to sober up too?"

For good vintage wine, in order to ensure the taste, it needs to be decanted after opening the bottle, filter out impurities, and combine with air, so that the fine wine will slowly wake up from its slumber, exuding its charming aroma and taste.Thinking about it this way, maybe the same is true for good artists.There is silence, accumulation, waiting, and qualitative change. In the years of silence in the eyes of others, I have completed my own improvement, and I am only waiting for the opportunity to open the bottle, and a person who knows how to appreciate delicious food.

Xu Budie mechanically opened the drawer. He had cleaned the kitchen before, so he found the bottle opener very easily and handed it over.

Cheng Zhu smiled: "As expected, you always know where you are... You are like my corkscrew, do you understand? So, stop frowning, relax, enjoy yourself, and earn money to support your family during the Chinese New Year. Tired, let me give you a massage and be your corkscrew." He rubbed his wrinkled face as if he had suffered a lot, as if he wanted to smooth out every wrinkle on him, but Rubbing and stroking turned into a kind of loving, childish and mischievous rubbing. Xu Budie's eyes were pulled into squinted eyes, his eyebrows turned into splayed eyebrows, and the corners of his mouth were squeezed into pouts.Cheng Zhu looked like a fool, just because of this little thing, he was laughing and laughing, his eyes were shining with joy.His simple and sincere happiness set off waves, blowing the wind, like a hurricane, sweeping away all the anguish lingering around Xu Budie, then he bent down and squeezed into the On Dudu's pursed lips of the octopus, a kiss was placed preciously.

"Ah, very delicious."

Xu Budie didn't know what to say, or didn't need to say anything, words were never so pale in front of the vivid emotions.He walked to the canvas in a daze, and picked up a tube of paint—the feeling of touch became strange, after all, he hadn't painted for a long time, and his basic skills were so unfamiliar that he began to crooked.But the colors...the colors have a strange magic, as if they have life and power of their own.He opened a tube of Prussian blue, and began to daub on the canvas as he wished—just watching this large area of ​​color block savagely swallowing up the blank space in his field of vision, for some reason, he felt a refreshing feeling of venting.

Cheng Zhu sat down beside him, and also picked up a paintbrush, like a conversation, or trouble, maybe it was just out of boredom or technical itch, he also dipped in the paint, and left a little grimace-like color in the big blue. red.Xu Budie painted the dense, depressing gray and black again, and he changed to white, splitting like a bolt of lightning from the stormy waves.

"I...actually, I don't have any talent. After studying for a few years, I can only say that it's okay. I can get by. I still have to take the entrance exam." Xu Budie said in a daze, as if his thoughts had entered another hazy place. World, "But my dad's expectations of me are very high... so high that I have a rebellious mentality, and the art training is very hard. The more I paint, the more I feel that I am not the material, so I want to study abroad and learn economics What, it's very fashionable anyway... I have a friend who has been a childhood sweetheart since he was a child, and he also went to study abroad, and he always tells me how good he is, but my heart is empty... So I At that time, I thought, I also want to go abroad to study, so I don’t have to be arranged by my family, I have to go my own way...it’s very middle school, right.”

Cheng Zhu didn't interrupt... even he could sense that this was the first time Xu Budie mentioned his father in such a long time.But now, the other party didn't want him to provide any advice, but just wanted someone to listen quietly.

"It was also strange at the time... My dad has always followed my lead. He became the deputy mayor in charge of culture. In fact, he has no money in his stomach and doesn't have much 'artistic quality', but he likes arty and is used to being praised. Yes... I showed a bit of artistic talent and interest when I was a child, and he insisted on cultivating me in this area as if he had found a treasure; to make up for his shortcomings; and those around him didn't even talk about it. I can say any flattering words, if you listen to them, then I will be the next generation of Picasso... So, I don't believe what he said at all, what kind of talent do I have...

"But in general, he is still a good father. The only thing about going abroad to study, for some reason, as soon as he brought it up, he suddenly turned his face... We are completely at a deadlock, never in this life. Such a big fight..."

"I refused to give up. I felt that the reason why he refused me to study abroad was because he wanted to realize his unrealized ideals in me. He regarded me as a tool person and never cared about my thoughts... So we have been together ever since. In the cold war, the kind who didn’t even say a word; I was boarding, and he was busy, so he couldn’t even see each other. But he said harshly, saying that if I don’t give up this idea and take the exam honestly, he I won't pay for my tuition in the future." Xu Budie closed his eyes lightly, and the red edge that he painted blended with other colors and then began to turn gray, "Who knows, it's a prophecy..."

Cheng Zhu didn't interrupt him, nor did he make any comments, but leaned closer to him, lent his shoulder.At the same time, the paintbrush in his hand is reconciling among those chaotic colors, like a silent pen conversation.

"At that time, my thoughts were completely flying, and I wished I could be free on the other side of the world tomorrow...It's funny, I didn't think about money at all at that time, even if I was warned that I would not pay my tuition fees, I didn't. Seriously, I have never been short of money since I was a child. I always feel that the money will come out suddenly, and one day it will be there. Even if my father doesn't give it to me, can my mother still make me hungry?...I My resentment also shifted to my studies. That period of time was obviously the most stressful time for the school exams. It was really perfunctory. I didn’t want to work any more. I spent all day studying how to take the exam abroad, which country to go to, and which school... I also consulted many intermediaries without telling my father..."

"Then it didn't take long before they suddenly had an accident... But to be honest, it's a bit exaggerated now that I think about it. At that time, the situation was very unreal, like a movie, or a prank reality show; the first to inform me It's not a hospital, nor a policeman...but a provincial discipline inspector. Before I understood what happened, I was called to a place...I can't even remember the name, and I accepted the first political review in my life. ...Because their investigation found that I was consulting about studying abroad, thinking that my dad wanted to use me to transfer assets abroad...I was not in the morgue, not in the funeral parlor, but saw his last appearance in the photo...

"But really, no one will believe it? Most of the embezzled money he embezzled was used to be fooled into buying those well-known overseas 'arts'. After checking, they are all fake...Do you dare to think? , are all fakes, imitations, and even fabricated ones. A few genuine ones are gifts from some domestic artists. , just make a movie based on this theme... Maybe it will be a big hit..."

He was talking, with tears still hanging on his eyelashes, but he really laughed out loud.The sweater on Cheng Zhu's body has a good smell, and it can bring him back to reality. His arms are protectively wrapped around his back. He didn't say anything embarrassing or regretful, but just tightened his arms. This kind of tight cage provides inexplicable peace of mind at this time.

"Thinking about it now, how could I still be admitted to University A under such absent-minded conditions? ... I don't know if he has tampered with it. After all, this is a school in the province, and he completely It makes sense... But, where do I go to ask him for an answer? That's the reason... I have always resisted going to school, and I have resisted receiving subsidies and scholarships from the school... I always feel very guilty, I'm guilty, do you understand, I can't tell anyone, no one can tell me about this, I don't even know who to blame..."

Dirty colors mixed together drew a straight line down the uncontrollable stroke, and the paintbrush fell to the ground along with the dangling wrist.

"Cheng Zhu, you're going to go all out to make me go back to school, but it makes me feel really scared... What if I'm a liar? What if I'm just like those 'works of art', a sham fake? ...You have paid so much, what if I am not worth it at all?"