lie guilty

After my dad went out, I turned my head to look at Mu Tian.Such a pair of eyes, under the dim light, are both clear and cloudy, deep and cold, I have never seen him look at me like this.He always looks at my dad like that. "Don't look at him so affectionately, I don't know, I thought you fell in love with my dad."

He didn't answer, just snorted coldly.

"What are you humming?" I couldn't help being a little displeased, "Why, am I wrong?"

He didn't speak, just turned his head away, leaned on the armrest of the chair, and stood up tremblingly.I quickly supported him, while secretly looking at his side face.

His expression was calm, so quiet that no one could see what he was thinking.I helped him step by step to the door, and he leaned half of his body weight on me.

This move shows that he trusts me.

I put on my hat and went out. I asked my mother's female secretary to take good care of my mother. She hurriedly agreed, then pouted her lips and put her finger on me again.

I thought that her lipstick must have been reapplied, so I hurriedly rejected it. It is not as good as those men who rely on her to take care of my mother.

I quickly finished the story to the group of men, they nodded hastily, and all of them grinned, I felt a chill, and hurriedly grabbed Mu Tian and left the hospital.

"Actually, you should get a wheelchair for you," I said to Mu Tian, ​​who was walking with a limp, "so that you won't be too tired from walking."

"Stop being wordy, get in the car." Instead, he opened the car door first and stepped in.

I shook my head helplessly, and got in too.

Mu Tian skillfully turned on the engine with five fingers, started the car, reversed it, accelerated gradually, and drove out of the garage.The surrounding scenery recedes gradually, faster and faster.It was very late, and many lights under the night sky had been turned off. The scenery was not as beautiful as it was when we came here, but it was more peaceful.

This kind of tranquility, compared to the bustling noise, is easier to enjoy when the mind is calm.

I opened the window, the wind came in and my hair was messed up.

Mu Tian straightened the rearview mirror with such a calm expression.I thought of what he heard from my dad just now that he didn't care about our relationship, and I thought he was very happy if he didn't say it, at least there was some joy in it.

But he didn't, and his expression even showed some indifference.

"...So you're not happy." My words were abrupt and without reason, but I knew he would understand.

I thought he would be like me, entangled in whether his parents would agree, the relationship between two same-sex lovers, I thought he would hope to get the blessings of his relatives, friends and society.

But obviously he doesn't care about that.

He doesn't care about this, so why did I hide our relationship before.I can't wait to let the whole world know our relationship, I can't wait to let the whole world know that he is mine.

He didn't answer.With a twist of the wrist, the car turned a corner.

"I'm not like my dad. I've identified someone and I won't let go. I know you understand." I said again.

He looked ahead without even moving his eyebrows, but the car accelerated unconsciously. I knew he was just stepping on the accelerator inadvertently, which meant that he was not as calm as he appeared on the surface.

After a while, he finally said: "Actually, I'm very happy, but I'm not happy." He raised his head slightly, as if looking ahead, and seemed to be lost in thought, "But, I hope you will never know why for the rest of your life."

There was an inexplicable fire in my heart.I couldn't help but hang down the glass hard, the glass bounced back, and there was a "boom", "Hurry up!"

I don't know why I got angry, he obviously didn't say anything to offend me, but I just felt that he had concealed an important thing from me, I just felt like a stick in my throat.He obviously likes me, but he always pretends, always pretends, just pretending that he doesn't like me.

Even my joy in being blessed in our relationship didn't make him one iota happy.

But he shut up again, and said no more.

Happiness is clearly in front of us, as long as he and I take a step forward.

But when I was already standing there, trying to reach out and pull him over, he didn't move.

It just popped up in front of my eyes from time to time, his brows were slightly arched, revealing a complex expression that I couldn't understand.

"Mu Tian, ​​tell the truth, do you want to be with me? What are you worrying about?" I couldn't help but say, "Or...the person you like is not me, but..." I thought of him Looking at my dad's eyes just now, "You don't really like my dad, do you? No wonder you want to be my dad's lover. I'm afraid it's not because you want Zhao's secrets, but because of my dad..."

He finally lost his composure and turned to look at me, "Zhao Mingze, what the hell are you thinking about all the time!"

"I don't think about anything, I think about you all day long!" I grabbed his hand holding the steering wheel, "Stop, stop quickly, let's explain it here today."

He held the steering wheel tightly, fixed his eyes on the road ahead, and gritted his teeth and said, "Zhao Mingze, you desperate lunatic, if you continue to toss around, it will be dawn, you will not survive!"

"Fuck! He's dead anyway!" I stretched out my foot and stepped on the brake for him.

Startled, he quickly turned a corner and the car turned to the side of the road.

When the brakes were slammed, the wheels made a screeching sound of gliding along the road, and then there was a "bang", and Mu Tian and I almost knocked our heads against the glass on one side. "Zhao Mingze!" He finally couldn't hold back and yelled, "I'll fucking beat you to death!" He twisted his body and punched me in the face, causing my head to hit the glass hard again.

I wipe, I still can't do him? !

I didn't beat him, and I couldn't bear to beat him.

I just leaned over, held the back of his head, dragged him to me, and kissed him hard.Extremely lingering, he was unwilling to open his mouth, so I forced him to open his mouth.The tongue opened a small slit, and then drove the tongue straight in, entangled in his mouth.

As soon as he clenched his teeth, he wanted to bite my tongue.I sneered inwardly, and pulled his jaw with my fingers so that his mouth could not be closed and his teeth could not be bitten, so that he raised his head, and then my fingers slid down and curved slightly on his throat.He felt a little itchy and wanted to back up, but I pressed the back of his head to keep him from moving.

I tasted all over his mouth, but I was still not satisfied.The fire in my heart has not disappeared.

You Mu Tian, ​​if you get along with Luo Kun, that's all.Well, it's not because of feelings?Today, I actually looked at my dad with straight eyes.

I withdrew from his mouth and looked at his face, furious, "My dad has exactly the same face as mine, just look at me, what the hell are you doing looking at him?" I pinched his collar, " What the hell are you looking at him doing?" I unbuttoned his jacket one by one, in fact, I wished I could tear them off all at once, "I tell you, even if it wasn't Luo Kun, you stabbed me to death, I don't care either. Luo Kun stabbed me, I don't necessarily forgive him, but if you killed me, let me tell you," I leaned over, bit his throat, and licked, "I don't care at all! I Just don't care at all!"

He pushed me away, struggled to turn over, and yelled at me, "You don't care, but I care!" He grabbed his chest, grabbed his heart, "You don't understand at all..." He seemed to be suffocated , his face suddenly turned red.

I was a little baffled, "I don't understand what, if you don't understand, how would I know..."

Before I finished speaking, he seemed to have made up his mind, and there seemed to be something shining in his eyes, shining brightly, but I couldn't see clearly. "You don't understand at all," he said, "you don't understand the feeling of your lover being killed in front of your eyes, and he was designed to die by yourself." He squeezed his chest, as if it was in great pain, "such a large area Blood, I did it, I did it..." He suddenly pinched my collar, his black and white eyes widened, and he looked at me vaguely, "Why do you have a heart attack? If you No, if you didn't..." He frowned, recalling eagerly, as if he wanted to redeem something, his feelings were almost overflowing, but unfortunately in the end, there was still nothing but regret, "If you didn't, I still have the possibility of regretting it, Maybe……"

Maybe, you can still survive.

Maybe you can still be with me.

I suddenly understood, understood his unfinished words.

After I realized that I had died, he had always had that sad expression that I couldn't understand.In it, I only read sadness.

But today, I think I understand the deeper meaning of that expression.

I hugged him and put my arms around him, "It's not too late, it's not too late, as long as my body can still move, as long as we can hug each other like this, as long as I can kiss you like this," I put my lips, Press it on his lips, and then smile, "Then we can continue to be together."

I used to write very clearly in my diary, recording my every word and every sentence in it.

I want the person in front of me to see it, I want him to understand my feelings, I want him to remember these years with me, from the first time I saw him to the last time, the last time I saw him before I was killed , the mood between so long and so long.

I still remember that many years ago, the teacher once said such a sentence. After I gave him the diary for the second time, although he did not comment on my diary again, on that day, he once put this sentence , written on the title page of my long-ago diary, which may no longer be found.Although I don't want to remember it, every time I open the diary, there is such a sentence on it.

If you want the sky to be more beautiful, you can only hold it if you enlarge your heart.

Thinking of this sentence, I smiled slightly at Mu Tian, ​​then raised my head to the sky.

Let me wipe, what's going on in the east?

Light burst out from the eastern sky, illuminating the entire city.The night sky seemed to be torn apart suddenly.Even tall buildings can't hide the sun's light shining into the sky.

Daylight breaks the darkness, something that ordinary people yearn for and love.

but--

Mu Tian and I could only look at each other and smile wryly.

Its daybreak.