Gu Weinan's Military Academy Diary

"Do you have any plans for the future? For example, where to work after graduation, how do you plan to live with Chen Nuo in the future?"

When they met at the train station, Gu Weinan was completely unable to answer Ye Xun's first sentence.He is just a freshman, a first-year student who has changed his choice and has no interest in the major he is studying.He is still confused about his own future, how can he consider how to live so far away with Chen Nuo.

"It doesn't matter, you are still young, you can think about it slowly." Ye Xun said to the speechless Gu Weinan very understandingly, and then asked in a caring tone, "Then Chen Nuo is with you now, what do you think of him?" Are you happy?"

"Uh..." Gu Weinan was questioned again, and he said a little uncertainly, "Every time he meets me, he looks very happy." He said, but his heart began to feel uneasy.He really didn't think about it.He only knows that every time he will be immersed in excitement and excitement, happiness is certain.At this time, Chen Nuo would smile beside him, and occasionally saying a few words would always make his head full of black lines.In comparison, it seems that Chen Nuo is not as happy as himself?After all, he was the one I pursued first!It is inevitable not to have my own excitement.

"Really?" Ye Xun's concerned tone, as if if Gu Weinan didn't make Chen Nuo happy, Ye Xun himself would be the most sorry.

"..." This further confirming question made Gu Weinan's only sliver of confidence gone.He suddenly remembered Chen Nuo's calmness, Chen Nuo's depression, and the sense of estrangement that often existed when he communicated with Chen Nuo.Chen Nuo often called him a "boy" in a joking tone, but in fact, he really wanted Chen Nuo to feel that he was mature enough.But the fact is that although he was heartbroken about what Chen Nuo had experienced, he couldn't fully appreciate it. He didn't understand a lot of what Chen Nuo knew and thought.With himself, will he really feel happy?

"I don't know..." Gu Weinan finally said this, feeling a little frustrated at the same time.

"Well, it's normal. Because you are still young." Ye Xun said again.

This "still young" made Gu Weinan feel like being stabbed again, but he couldn't refute it.

"Chen Nuo may be going to Xinjiang, do you know?"

"Go to Xinjiang?" Gu Weinan was obviously unprepared, his reaction was completely shocked and surprised, "He didn't tell me..."

"Oh, so he hasn't said it yet." Ye Xun was also a little surprised, and then he had a understanding expression, "He told me that he would consider it, maybe because he felt embarrassed, he didn't tell you for the time being. After all, if he If you want to go, you will have to separate for two years."

"Two years?" Gu Weinan's heart sank suddenly.He and Chen Nuo have only just started, and they have dated dozens of times, and they have been separated for two years. What kind of concept is that?

"If Chen Nuo decides to go to aid Xinjiang, it is very likely that you will break up, so Chen Nuo will be in trouble." Ye Xun has already told Gu Weinan what he is most worried about, "Now your situation is that Chen Nuo finds time to come See you? It must be when you have time. If Chen Nuo went to Xinjiang, the communication there would be almost cut off from here. Unless you go to him, he will never come back to see you. In the past two years How many times can you go to see him?"

Gu Weinan sat blankly on his seat, turning a blind eye to the food being served one after another, he suddenly felt very helpless, the kind of helplessness without any ideas or solutions.He opened his mouth slowly, as if he was talking to himself: "Can't he not go?"

Ye Xun said politely: "Let's eat first, you can ask him yourself. Anyway, he hasn't decided yet."

Gu Weinan picked up the chopsticks with a heavy heart, and suddenly remembered to ask: "Captain Ye, you have been to Xinjiang too, right? You were still with Chen Nuo at that time, how did Chen Nuo react?"

"He," Ye Xun smiled, "he will be so jealous when he hears about it, he wishes he could go with him right after graduation."

"Oh." Gu Weinan suddenly felt ashamed.what to do?My thoughts and Chen Nuo's were simply too far apart.Not to mention jealousy, not only has he never thought of going to Xinjiang, he also wished Chen Nuo would never go!

"But I regret going now." Ye Xun said helplessly.

"Ah, why?"

"Because if we don't go, Chen Nuo and I may not break up now."

"Uh..." Gu Weinan mumbled noncommittally, he thought you were arrested for cheating?

In the end, Ye Xun himself was the first to be frank: "Of course I also made some mistakes, but this is not the main reason for our separation."

"Is it because of Xiao Xiaotian?" Gu Weinan interrupted.

"Well, I don't know how Chen Nuo mentioned it to you. In short, it was the biggest misunderstanding between me and him. Chen Nuo became ill later because of him. Xiao Xiaotian's sacrifice hit Chen Nuo hard, and Chen Nuo was emotionally exhausted for a long time. Depressed, could hardly eat anything, and then..."

"He had acute stomach bleeding, and later had neurasthenia, I know." Gu Weinan felt that his voice must have become so low and hoarse because of the overuse of vocal cords in the past few days, "He told me."

"Yes, it's scary. You'll never want to experience that feeling of fear a second time. His family doesn't know about my relationship with Chen Nuo. They just saw Chen Nuo as Xiao Xiaotian and thought he and Xiao Xiaotian were the same. Lover. Later, I told his parents frankly that I wanted to take care of Chen Nuo, and our relationship was recognized." Ye Xun smiled wryly, "I really didn't expect that we would be so deadlocked with him now, I hope you don't make the same mistakes I made."

Gu Weinan didn't listen carefully to Ye Xun's reminiscence, but he was very uncomfortable when he heard the last sentence: "But if he is going, we will have to separate..."

"If you still want to be with him, persuade him to give up." Ye Xun said frankly, "He is still thinking about it. Although he has always wanted to go to Xinjiang since graduation, maybe he will give up for you?"

Hearing Ye Xun's words, Gu Weinan became even more desperate: "Since he wants to go so much, he definitely won't give up. I will only meet a few more times with me, which can't replace his pursuit. ——This is not at all One thing."

Ye Xun sighed: "Chen Nuo's body has just recovered not long ago. Under such circumstances, will you rest assured that he will go to aid Xinjiang? If not, is there any way to take care of him and protect him?"

"Of course I'm worried..." Gu Weinan frowned, "Of course I want to take care of him...but I—"

"I have to protect you, you are underage." Gu Weinan suddenly remembered that Chen Nuo once said to him half-jokingly, so what ability does he have to protect Chen Nuo now?

"I understand." Ye Xun said understandingly.

"I'm only a freshman..." Gu Weinan almost didn't have the courage to emphasize his current situation again, but he didn't want to say these words from Ye Xun's mouth again.

"So you should think about it too." Ye Xun looked at him earnestly, "Sometimes, emotional impulse is not enough. Whether two people have like-minded ideals, whether they can support and help each other is also very important. Chen Nuo is a particularly idealistic person, if you can't keep pace with him, you will feel very hard, and Chen Nuo will also be very embarrassed."

"..." Gu Weinan didn't say a word, the gap in thought and identity with Chen Nuo had always been the reason why he felt unconfident.He originally hoped that as long as the relationship between the two of them is stable, all these can be made up slowly with time, because he will always graduate, and one day he will find his own direction.But now?He couldn't do anything yet.

"If you really want to be with him, then try your best to keep him. If you want to respect Chen Nuo's ideals, you might as well give him up." Ye Xun finally said, "Of course you can choose to wait for him, because you are , you have time to read while waiting, but I suggest you not use this to bind Chen Nuo. Because when he is fighting alone at the border, you can neither be like-minded with him, nor give him any support, just give him a waiting What's the point of the promise?"

After hearing these words, Gu Weinan was completely chilled.No matter what the purpose was, Ye Xun's words were true, and they hit his sore spots accurately.Except for a fanatical and impulsive feeling, he seems to be able to bring Chen Nuo nothing, and this feeling seems to be more of an enjoyment for himself. He doesn't even know whether Chen Nuo is really happy in this relationship. affim.

At [-] o'clock in the evening, Chen Nuo was still busy on duty at the border checkpoint of C City International Airport, until he was called by his name by a colleague, and he looked up to see the shy boy in casual clothes following him.

Chen Nuo's expression was a little surprised: "Why are you here? Shouldn't you go home on vacation after duty?"

"Well, I delayed the ticket for a few days." Gu Weinan said while nervously gripping the strap of his backpack, "I came by long-distance bus."

"You don't look very good, are you motion sick?"

"No." Gu Weinan lowered his head.

Chen Nuo smiled: "Then just wait a while, the shift will take place in about ten minutes. There are many chairs over there, go and have a rest."

"Oh." Gu Weinan said, but didn't sit down, just stood nearby, aimlessly looking at the posters and service slogans standing next to him.There is a cartoon image in the shape of an orange shield on the poster, which looks like a little sun at first glance.

"That is the new service brand image launched by the border inspection station," Chen Nuo saw Gu Weinan watching, and introduced to him, "It's called Tiantian."

"Tiantian?" Gu Weinan was taken aback, remembering Zhou Yang's nickname for Xiao Xiaotian.

"It's a coincidence!" Chen Nuo patted the poster next to him emotionally, "I am very happy every time I see 'Tian Tian', and I feel like Xiao Xiaotian is by my side. I'm scared to death. Here, I'll give you a 'Tian Tian', that's all I've got, and I'm sending them off to the passengers." Chen Nuo said and found a small fan with "Tian Tian" printed on it from the cabinet.

Although Gu Weinan was full of thoughts, he still couldn't help the black line: "I printed a bunch of fans in the winter and gave them away, you really have it..."

"As a souvenir, it can be saved for summer." While Chen Nuo was talking, a group of passengers came to go through the exit procedures, and he hurried away again.

Ten minutes later, Gu Weinan followed Chen Nuo to the duty room. Seeing that there were still people sleeping on the sofa in the duty room, he was a little hesitant.Chen Nuo walked over and chased that person up: "Wake up, Lao Luo is already on duty, how dare you not go." The colleague reluctantly got up and went out.Chen Nuo pushed Gu Weinan onto the sofa just now, turned around and said, "Are you thirsty, do you want some water?"

"Thank you, no need." Gu Weinan said very stiffly.

"Have you had dinner then?"

"have eaten."

"I haven't eaten yet, why don't we go have a midnight snack together."

"I……"

Chen Nuo has already taken out the military jacket from the cabinet: "Let's go, I don't have a shift until noon tomorrow, so I'm fine now."

In a small restaurant by the airport, Chen Nuo ordered two bowls of noodles and a side dish. The steaming noodle soup looked very tempting, but Gu Weinan didn't move with his chopsticks, and he had no appetite at all.

"Chen Nuo." Gu Weinan called out cautiously.

"Huh?" Chen Nuo was obviously very hungry, so he focused on eating noodles, "Eat some if you're not hungry, try it, this noodle restaurant is quite famous."

Gu Weinan reluctantly ate a few mouthfuls, the taste was really good, but he still couldn't swallow it.He hesitated until Chen Nuo ate half of the noodles, and finally plucked up the courage to speak: "Chen Nuo, I... have something to tell you."

"What?" Chen Nuo raised his head with a smile.

When Gu Weinan saw his smile, he almost wanted to cry. That day at the school gate, he was fascinated by such a smile.But then he forced himself to bow his head and said in a low and clear voice, "I want to break up with you."

Chen Nuo stopped eating noodles, but Gu Weinan waited for a long time, but he didn't hear his voice, not even his shallow breathing.Gu Weinan finally slowly raised his head and looked towards the opposite side, only to see that Chen Nuo was still maintaining the same movements just now, but the smile on his face had long since disappeared.