Xu Jun's life

March [-]th is the banquet for my dad's [-]th birthday.

It's a local custom. Once a person is over [-], the birthday party is held on the second day of his birthday. There is a very ugly saying about this custom, which is called "deceiving the king of hell". Come, as long as the old man escapes the day of his birthday, he will be safe and healthy this year.

When I explained this custom to Li Zhurong, he frowned, disapproving, and almost wrote "feudal superstition is dross" on his face.

However, disdain is disdain, but he did not express any objection. From the gift money to the number of banquets, he did not say a word until the morning of March [-], when my mother brought two sets of formal attire that looked like an engagement, and asked Shen Wanyi and me to change into them.Li Zhurong's complexion just "brushed" and sank.

Both Shen Wanyi and I were taken aback by my mother's hand, Shen Wanyi subconsciously took a step aside, trying to clear up the relationship with me.

Li Zhurong's face was ugly.

I shook his hand to express comfort, reached out and grabbed my mother's arm, led her into my father's study, and closed the door by the way.

"Mom, what do you mean?" I frowned and hurriedly said: "Shen Wanyi and I have already called off our engagement, why are you still doing this?"

My mother didn't listen to my words at all, and chose the fluff on the suit jacket on her own: "I don't care about your love affairs. I only know that today is your father's birthday. If you talk to me in front of others That man is out and about, do you still want me and your father's old faces? Do you really want to make your father angry?"

I was speechless by her scolding, thinking about what I owed my elder brother all these years, I really couldn't disobey her at this time.

So, I had no choice but to persuade Li Zhurong.

Li Zhurong is easy to find. There is no escape word in his dictionary, so no matter how angry he is, he will never slam the door and leave.

He was standing on the balcony with his back to us, and he was smoking.

He was wearing the navy blue suit that Yuan Hai rushed over yesterday. I suddenly remembered that the day I came back, I took him to the rooftop. He thought my house was coming soon, and he stood in the corridor, smiling at me with his eyes bent, making him smile. I help him fix his hair.

When he stood with me and knocked on the door of my house, his whole body was tense. I have never seen him so tense...

I didn't dare to think about it anymore, so I walked a few steps quickly and stood beside him.

He was smoking Luckystrike, and the unremarkable, slender white cigarette was in his hand, fully worthy of the expensive price.

"Give me a cigarette." I said to him.

I have always disliked the cigarettes he smoked, it was too choking and made my throat sore.But he has been smoking this kind of cigarette for so many years. In his words, the cigarette is originally used to relieve fatigue, and naturally the stronger the better.

Neither of us is a fool, and he is even more a man who came out of the scheming mall. There are some things that I don't say, and he doesn't say anything, but we both know in our hearts that I have made a choice.

I stood on the balcony and looked down. The early morning sky hadn't completely brightened yet.Downstairs, his car was parked under the shade of a tree. Yuan Hai was waiting for us inside. Li Zhurong had booked a seat at Huayue Building two days earlier. Yuan Hai had been waiting here since six o'clock in the morning today, ready to pick us up. Huayue Building.

After smoking a cigarette, I felt like I had swallowed Coptis chinensis, and bitterness came from my throat.

The road we walk has never been a broad road. The eyes of others, the face of our parents, and gossip and gossip are actually nothing more than four simple words: people's words are awesome.

I don't want to persuade him, and I can't persuade him.He is the kind of person who has his own ideas about everything, and never changes his position because of other people's opinions.I know, as long as I stand here, frowning, smoking a cigarette, even if I don’t say a word, he will understand what I’m embarrassing. Love, let him see my embarrassment.Lin Youxi said that he will not let the matter get out of hand, I believe he will back down.

There was a rustling sound behind me, it was my mother in the living room, deliberately packing up things to make noise, I knew she was urging me: the guests will come to the door soon, I can’t let those relatives who are doing good things see that there is one in my house.” Extra' man here, they're sure to figure it out.

I held his hand, his fingers were cold from standing on the balcony for too long.

I heard my own voice, muffled and low. "Xiao Zhe, I'm sorry for you..." "Teacher, I'm sorry for nothing," he took his hand away from me, and said lightly: "I'm sorry for you." I know, he still cares about yesterday That sentence at night.

I couldn't tell him that it wasn't my intention.

I know that he is Li Zhurong, he must have a son, if he dies, his grandfather will kill me at all costs.

But that sentence has been said, and there is no room for taking it back.

Others say that I have a good temper, that I have a gentle personality and don't compete with others.In fact, don't fight because you don't care.The only anger and ruthlessness that I, Xu Xu, had in my life were all used on Li Zhurong.

I watched him walk out of the living room, and when he went out, he said, "I'm going downstairs."

I'd rather he yell at me and ask me why I can't do what he can do, and I'd rather he threaten me with a few more vicious words.

His appearance makes me sad, he is hardly like Li Zhurong.

I suddenly remembered the young man who held my hand and stood in the Li family's mansion many years ago. He once raised his neck like that and told everyone: "This is Xu Xu, I like him."

This is a sentence I owe him.

Maybe it was because my complexion was too ugly, my mother didn't insist that Shen Wanyi and I change into that formal suit.The way the old lady sat on the sofa with her head down, silently putting away the two sets of clothes made me very sad.

I know, those are the wedding clothes she bought for me and Shen Wanyi last year.

Too bad she'll never see us in that dress.

I think I probably failed as a human being. I made a good birthday so unsatisfactory, and people on both sides were unhappy.

Around nine o'clock, guests came to the house one after another. I was busy serving tea and water, and reminiscing with people. When I was free, I always looked at the balcony unconsciously. I knew that his car was still under it.He might, too, still be down there.

What is he thinking now?

Around eleven o'clock, Yuan Hai called and asked how many guests there were and when they were leaving.

There were not many relatives who specially came to the house to celebrate their birthdays. Most of them went directly to Huayue Building, and two cars sent them there. Shen Wanyi drove one, and Yuan Hai also drove an extended Lincoln.Relatives thought I rented it, and joked with me with a smile, saying: "Xu Xu is now a professor and rich..."

Yuan Hai stood outside the car, opening the door for everyone politely. He was actually Li Zhurong's deputy, someone like the second in command. Even if Xia Zhifei came to discuss business with Li Zhurong, he didn't have to drive the car himself. Door.

I went around to the passenger seat, ready to sit in.Before the hand touched the handle, the window pane came down.

First is the black hair, then the beautiful forehead, the cold red phoenix eyes, the high nose bridge, and the thin lips tightly pursed.

Li Zhurong sat in the passenger seat and looked at me quietly.

Eyes met, I quickly looked away, went to the back seat and sat down.

During the whole drive, I didn't hear a word of what those relatives were saying. My mind was full of his eyes just now.Right now he is sitting in front of me, silent, like a silent sculpture.

Silence is sometimes more disturbing than condemnation.

"Xu Xu, what are you thinking..." My mother pushed me and said displeasedly, "I'm distracted again, uncle is asking you something..."

"Oh." I collected my polite smile and asked the second uncle who looked somewhat similar to my mother: "What did uncle ask?"

"I said! When will you and Miss Shen get married! Your mother is still waiting to have a grandson!"

Because of his age, uncle's ears could no longer hear clearly, so he thought his voice was very low, and he tried to speak at the top of his voice, which was deafening.Even people outside the car could hear it.

I dare not look at Li Zhurong's expression in the rearview mirror!

I'd love to yell "shut up!" at these relentless relatives who gossip behind the surface of the intimacy, and then growl and tell them that I'm not going to marry a woman in my fucking life, what a fart The grandson can hug!The only thing I, Xu Xu, loves in this life is that man named Li Zhurong in the front seat!Just pass it on!Just scold!I've been a disgusting spine-tingling gay all my life!So what!No matter how much you point and twitter, I will never lose a piece of meat!No matter how many rumors there are, I will not die!

But I can't.

I won't die, my parents will.When people live to their age, they look down on benefits and just want to have a good reputation.I can't give them a grandson, at least I have to give them a face.

As long as I live, I have to worry about my parents' face and their feelings.

I am a hopeless coward.

When we arrived at Huayue Building, the relatives got out of the car one by one, and I was the last one, watching the car drive away.

Shen Wanyi asked the doorman to park the car, and walked down wearing a rose gray dress.Stand beside me, cover your brows with your hands, look at the direction of the car for a while, and smile: "No way, he left obediently? What kind of spell did you cast?"

I was not in the mood to joke with her, so I turned around and walked inside by myself.

She chased after me and smiled: "This guy is not as bad as I thought."

During dinner, a relative asked me with a smile: "Who was that person in the car just now? He looks like a foreigner, and his face is quite scary."

Shen Wanyi joked with a smile: "I have to ask Xu Xu about it, maybe Xu Xu didn't pay the fare, and he's not happy..."

So the table laughed together, and the host and guest enjoyed themselves.