allow you this life

In the autumn four years ago, in the afternoon.

Zhou Fangran is still a sophomore, working in the life department of the student union of the department. He has been busy with the freshmen party for the past few days. A freshman girl told him that he lacked a document. I brought the materials in my bag, and after a few words of explanation, I hurried to the dormitory.

It’s embarrassing to say that Zhou Fangran still doesn’t know how to ride a bicycle (in fact, he can’t say he can’t, but he hasn’t ridden for nearly ten years since he learned it, and he’s used to either taking a taxi or walking every time he goes out), so now he can only walk Walk back to the dormitory.

Although the afternoon sun is warm, it is already a bit chilly. Withered and yellow leaves slowly fall on the road leading to the dormitory. Sometimes you can even see one or two stray cats shivering in the wind, meowing, which is very pitiful. .Seeing this scene, Zhou Fangran still felt pity, but most of the time he was powerless. He wanted to buy something to feed him a few times, but he was afraid of being said to be hypocritical, so he had to rush past and couldn't bear to take a closer look.

Entering the dormitory building, Zhou Fangran greeted the dormitory manager politely, turned left and walked a few steps, then turned right and entered a corridor, beside which there were dormitory doors.They still lived on the sixth floor when they were freshmen, but they moved to the first floor to accommodate freshmen after they were promoted to sophomore year. The corridor on the first floor is outside a green space, and iron gauze was installed outside the corridor to ensure the safety of the students.

That day was perhaps the best and saddest day of his life.

Zhou Fangran took out the key and was about to open the door when he heard the kitten meowing a few times. Looking at the sound, at the end of the corridor, a strange boy was squatting and stroking a gray kitten that was eating. The barbed gauze seeped into the corridor floor, mottled with light and shadow.

Zhou Fangran adjusted his glasses to see clearly. The boy had stood up and held the kitten in his arms to comfort him. The sun was hitting his fine hair and body, forming a golden halo. Zhou Fangran rubbed his eyes to see the boy clearly. The whole picture, white sweater, gray slim denim, black clover sneakers, clean, fresh and natural, seems to be a landscape.The key in his hand accidentally dropped on the ground in a daze, Zhou Fangran came back to his senses and quickly bent down to pick it up. The man also seemed to hear the movement and looked towards him. When he got up, the eyes of the two were so Right on.

For a moment, Zhou Fangran's heart skipped a beat and his breathing stopped.

Afterwards, Zhou Fangran recalled the situation that day, and he completely believed in the so-called "love at first sight" that he had always dismissed. The ridiculous fate seemed to make everything so wonderful. He was not a materialist but he was not superstitious. He scoffed, firstly he thought it was too earthy, and secondly he felt that God might not like him or had no time to take care of him, so it was impossible to just throw a "fate" on his head.

But human nature is like this, although the "expectation" is not so strong, it is still there, as if you know that junk food is "junk" but you still can't control your mouth.

The boy's bangs couldn't stop the gentle gaze in his eyes, his nose was high, his skin was very white but healthy white, the sun just so softly fell on his body, there seemed to be a picture between the light and shadow. Zhou Fangran was stunned by the oil painting for a while, but the man smiled kindly at him, his eyes were crooked, Zhou Fangran felt that some people are so beautiful, and some people are so beautiful and approachable. I just want to see more.

The boy at the end of the corridor could not be called the all-powerful man, but to Zhou Fangran, his heart had already been stabbed severely.

When Zhou Fangran came back to his senses, the man had put away his smile, his eyes were full of doubts, and his eyebrows were raised slightly, as if he was asking him:

"Is there a problem?".

It was only then that Zhou Fangran realized that he was being impolite, his face turned red from embarrassment, he hurriedly avoided the man's eyes, opened the door with trembling hands, then turned around and quickly closed the dormitory door, he leaned against the door, a little dazed for a while, It took a while to react to this feeling and taste.

In fact, looking back at myself for the past twenty years, my sexual orientation has always been as unpredictable as grass on the wall, Zhou Fangran himself finds it interesting, in other words, he himself does not know what his sexual orientation is, but things are impermanent, since everything has no laws Just let nature take its course, he doesn't really care about these things. Speaking of which, Zhou Fangran was still very rigid in the past. In his opinion, homosexuality is almost a "rebellious" thing, but he doesn't know whether it is the environment or other factors that made him I changed my mind unintentionally. In fact, I just think that I just like good-looking people, it has nothing to do with gender, and sometimes it has nothing to do with love.But he is also very clear that he "almost fell" just now, why do you say almost? After the first love and the second relationship, even in the empty window period, he locked up his heart and feelings and did not intend to treat anyone. Open up your heart, Zhou Fangran is this kind of person: love is to love deeply, penetrate to the bone, love beyond oneself, because the first love is unrequited love (falling in love with a straight man), and the second love is the one who was dumped Well, Zhou Fangran has completely tasted the feeling of "heartache". This feeling is too uncomfortable, so he no longer has the courage to love anyone or the courage to face "failed love".He made up his mind and died, never to like anyone again.

"Why should I wrong myself so much?" This is his motto.

However, at this time, Zhou Fangran didn't think of this, and his mind was full of everything that happened just now.

Is that person still there? How old is he? Does he think I’m a pervert? Does he have a date? Is it a boy or a girl? Is he the same as me? Clear lake water, I want to swim in it first, what does he look like in a swimsuit, three-point style? ? ? ? ?What does it look like without clothes... blah blah blah.Zhou Fangran blushed and had a fever, and couldn't calm down for a moment. His mind was thinking wildly, and he unconsciously turned the doorknob. He slowly opened the door, accompanied by a long creaking sound.

"Really, this door has been broken down for some years. What a bad school, lubricate it..." He could only use his inner os to try to calm himself, he poked his head out a little, just as he was able to see the situation at the other end of the corridor clearly Then he drew back abruptly, touched his nose, and when he turned his head, he saw the uncleared trash can next to his chair. Zhou Fangran dumped the trash into the bag with lightning speed (not a QQ whirlwind), and then blew Whistling, he walked out of the dormitory as if nothing had happened, and just stepped out the door, he pretended to glance to the right inadvertently.

That boy is no longer there.

Zhou Fangran fixedly looked at the place where the boy was, making sure that he would not suddenly pop out from any corner, and then he let out a long sigh of relief. At the same time, he felt a little lonely. At this moment, the sunlight just disappeared along with the reflection on the ground.

"Thinking of you feels like lingering rain.

Wet my years, but I still don't know it.

The feeling of thinking about you is like the lingering wind.

Blowing messes up my day and night, even blowing can't blow away your face. "

The cell phone rang, and Zhou Fangran saw that it was from a school girl, but amidst Joey Yung's mesmerizing singing, he didn't want to answer the phone for a moment, but just repeated it over and over again, standing there blankly, thinking about it. What, want to remember something also want to forget something.

I do not know how long, quiet.

At that moment, Zhou Fangran didn't know what was wrong with him, he was stunned for a while, "I might be a sb, no, I must be a sb", he muttered to himself and hurried back to the school girl.

"President Zhou, what's the matter, why didn't you answer the call for so long?"

"Sorry, sorry, I didn't hear something just now, what's wrong?"

"What's the matter, what about the information I want, Master Zhou fell into a trap halfway? Why haven't you come back yet?"

"Oh, yes, I remembered, I'm really sorry, I really forgot something just now, I..."

"Okay, hurry up and send it over here, it's in a hurry to use it here"

The school girl seemed a little impatient and hung up the phone

Hearing a series of busy signals, Zhou Fangran threw away the trash, put on the information and put on a windbreaker and walked out of the dormitory. Then he couldn't help but glance at the end of the corridor on the right.That person is indeed gone, it seems that what happened just now was a dream.

Walking on the road, Zhou Fangran kept thinking: I don’t know which department the boy is from and which dormitory he lives in. Since he lives on the same floor, he must be a sophomore. By the way, what’s his name? Is his name nice? Wow Such a good-looking name must be very good-sounding. Fuck, inheritance is too tm unreliable. Why do some people look like gods, and some people, like me, "can't bear to look at it carefully, it's too horrible to look at", Like shit stepped on on purpose...

Zhou Fangran was thinking wildly, and unknowingly, he had already walked to the door of the cultural exchange activity center for college students. When the junior girl saw him appearing at the door, she rushed up, which shocked him.

"OMG, President Zhou, you're too slow!" The school girl frowned and took the materials in Zhou Fangran's hand, complaining dissatisfiedly.

"I'm really sorry, I'm sorry." Zhou Fangran had to apologize again, with a smile on his face: "I have short legs and walk slowly, it's all my mother's bad birth."

The corner of the junior girl's mouth twitched, maybe she wanted to laugh, but she sighed: "Oh, senior, it's not your fault that you are short, it's your fault if the frequency is not good." After speaking, she patted Zhou Fangran on the shoulder. He hugged himself tightly: "You, why are you so filthy, kid? What do you think about every day!" He thought again, and looked at the school girl meaningfully: "It seems that you just met your godfather and didn't teach you well." Be a human'", the school girl was noncommittal, raised her eyebrows and smiled, leaving a back view and left.

This girl is Xia Xiaoyi who has been named the "Queen of the Human Car". This strange woman's ability is that she can drive from time to time. Sometimes she drives very steadily, but occasionally she rolls over, but she won't be annoying. .Speaking of this, since there is a "Queen of Human Cars", of course there is also a "King of Human Cars". It's just that no one is interested in this position. However, someone strongly recommended Zhou Fangran that he is qualified, but he has always refused this "honor". Let’s just say that I’m still an ordinary ordinary person.

Finally, after five o'clock in the afternoon, there were still a few people in the activity center who were still discussing related matters. There was nothing wrong with Zhou Fangran. Today coincided with Wednesday afternoon and there were no classes. He originally planned to go to the library to read books, but he never thought He was called by Xia Xiaoyi to the activity center to help with the decoration of the "New Year's Party". Now it's nothing to do. As soon as he went out, he saw Xia Xiaoyi and his boyfriend who had already been waiting at the door there. When Zhou Fangran passed by, Zhou Fangran frowned and glanced at Xia Xiaoyi. Xia Xiaoyi became more excited when she saw Zhou Fangran's uncomfortable expression, and she shook her boyfriend's arm in a coquettish and coquettish manner. It was obvious that she was single or not. Zhou Fangran, the dog, watched: Look! There is also a handsome guy who drove the "behind the car"!

"Be careful not to 'drive' with fatigue!" Zhou Fangran walked over and said to the spare tire guy who didn't know where he was in the queue with great interest, and patted him on the shoulder in a friendly manner.

In fact, he doesn't care about these petty provocations at all, or even if a little discomfort is fleeting, he is used to living alone and calls himself a "single nobleman", but sometimes he looks distraught. Some people look like stray dogs.Xia Xiaoyi smiled slyly, and dragged her confused silly boyfriend away.