evil sea tide

Although it was the expected answer, Song Jue's face collapsed when he heard Hai Donglin say these three words, the last gleam of light in his eyes was shattered, and he lowered his arms, paralyzed as if he had lost his soul Sitting on the sofa.

Hai Donglin couldn't see his look as if he hated the world, walked over and grabbed his collar and asked, "What are you doing like this? There are so many men and women in this world, can it be him? No matter who you like, Brother Dong Go find it for you, can you change it?"

Song Jue didn't resist, and silently let him be at his mercy, shaking his head weakly, "Brother Dong, you won't understand, you won't..."

Hai Donglin doesn't seem to be born with the feelings of a normal person, so naturally he doesn't understand Song Jue's feelings.Song Jue gritted his teeth in pain and endured this kind of pain as if his soul was being torn apart. It was his own fault. He lost Yang Ze, so who could be blamed?

Hai Donglin threw him back to the sofa, lit a cigarette and smoked silently. When the cigarette in his hand was about to burn out, he said to Song Jue, "Ah Jue, forget about him..."

He doesn't know how much Song Jue can listen to, but he can't stay here forever. There are a lot of things going on in the imperial capital. He has spent three months here, and his new company is already in chaos. Must go back as soon as possible.But he was really worried about Song Jue's appearance, and he had to cheer him up before leaving.

"You know, I don't know much about feelings. In my opinion, it's not that if there is no one in this world, you can't live. If Yang Ze is gone, you can change it. Wang Ze and Li Ze are fine. Maybe you will know after trying it. , you don't have to have him."

When Hai Donglin said this, he didn't have a clue in his heart, he just treated a dead horse as a living horse doctor.He knew how many lovers Song Jue had, which was why he was surprised that Yang Ze had such a great influence on him.He felt that since Yang Ze was gone and they separated, Song Jue would gradually forget him, and the best way to forget him was to fill it with a fresh face and body.

Song Jue raised her head slightly, and asked in a trembling voice, "Really?"

Hai Donglin didn't answer, and smoked a second cigarette.

Song Jue was really tormented by this kind of pain, and Hai Donglin's words made him suddenly have a clear path——

That's right, who can I, Song Jue, want?Could it be Yang Ze?If he wants to break up, let's break up. There are so many men and women in the world, and there are thousands of people who are better than Yang Ze. Why bother to hang on a tree?

The next day, Song Jue hung up his beard, tidied his hair, and came to the company in a neat suit. Although his expression was still very tired, he was a different person compared to a few days ago, which shocked Tommy. Boss Hai still has a solution.

From this day on, Song Jue seemed to have returned to normal. His performance in the company was no different from usual. The only thing that changed was that his private life became more chaotic.

Mature and beautiful women, men with clear temperament, as long as he has his eyes on them, they will all be taken to the bed and turned upside down.At the most absurd moment, a roomful of naked men and women lay naked in front of him for him to choose from.

This kind of extremely promiscuous life brought great satisfaction to his body. He never returned to the country, but stayed in hotels and high-end clubs every night, with men and women who could not be named in his arms. When he woke up, he even Don't recognize their faces.

During the day, Song Jue is an extremely competent company boss. He works harder than before and actively expands NAE's business, but at night, all that is left is alcohol and a lively and graceful body.He used them to numb his nerves and make him forget about that person.

But no matter how many people I have sex with, no matter how many times I vent, the hole in my heart can't be filled, and it even becomes more empty after the madness.

At 7 o'clock in the morning, Song Jue opened his eyes and looked around blankly.

He was lying on the big bed in the VIP room of a five-star hotel. His right hand was embracing an exquisite-looking woman, although part of that exquisiteness came from her heavy makeup that had not faded away. On the right hand was a delicate and clean boy. Falling asleep with his arms around her.These were his bedmates from last night, and there was only one thing about them, and that was that they were partly like one person.

For example, this woman's earlobe, this boy's lips.

This is the condition for him to choose a bed partner. He doesn't need them to be extremely handsome, as long as they can let him find the shadow of that person, that's enough.

But he felt more and more irritable. Not only could they not satisfy his longing for Yang Ze, but they deepened this longing. After the passion, there was only emptiness and hesitation that could swallow the whole world.

He sat up suddenly, waking up the two people beside him.

"Mr. Song, it's so early? Why don't you go to bed again~" The woman pouted and leaned towards him, trying to drag him to lie down and continue.

The boy didn't show any weakness, he put his hand directly under it and kneaded it gently, licked his dry lips with his tongue, and said to him winkingly, "Mr. Song, do you want it again?"

Song Jue's stomach was churning, and she was so sick that she was about to vomit on the spot.

Yang Ze would not be like this, the two of them are already an old couple, but he would still shyly grab his arm and tremble slightly during the foreplay, but after the official start, he would become extraordinarily slutty, completely daring Not like him.But no matter what kind of Yang Ze is, his eyes are always full of his shadow, and his undisguised love will make Song Jue climb to the top every time.

Unlike them, fake smiles, false flattery.

He waved them away and said with a sullen face, "Go away."

The two were slightly stunned, the woman pursed her lips and said aggrievedly: "Boss Song, is Momo not serving you well?"

The boy withdrew his hand and said in horror: "President Song, you said last night that you were very satisfied with my performance..."

"Get out of here!!!" Song Jue roared unbearably.

The two looked at each other and had no choice but to get up and get dressed.The boy's temper became stronger and he became more courageous.Before going out, he turned his head and said to Song Jue: "Boss Song, I don't know where we are not serving you well, but you always call other people's names on the bed. Willing to be someone else's stand-in."

Song Jue was slightly taken aback, and they had already walked out of the room when she regained consciousness.

From this day on, Song Jue was uncharacteristically, he no longer indulged himself in playing games with flowers, but lived a nine-to-five life.He refused all unnecessary drinking parties, and returned home from get off work on time every day.The room still remained the same as when Yang Ze was still there, without any change.This place he called home has now become a prison, full of their memories, once he stepped into this place, Yang Ze's shadow was in front of him, he wanted to escape from here in great pain, but he couldn't Can't move.Because he is nostalgic for this place, except for this place, he can no longer feel Yang Ze's breath.

Every night is a torment for him. He has nightmares and sleepless nights. He always wakes up in the middle of the night with tears that haven't dried up on his face.

He dipped the transparent liquid with his fingertips and watched them lost in thought.His mother said that he had a hard temper and disobedience since he was a child. Even if his father was about to beat him to death, he would not shed a single tear, but just gritted his teeth and stared angrily.In his memory, he seems to have never shed tears in front of others, but in the silent night when no one was there, his eyes were wet because of Yang Ze's back in his dream.

He was wrong, completely wrong.

Knowing that Yang Ze disappeared in his life, he realized how important he was to him. Yang Ze did not exist in his brain, but was deeply rooted in his bones and blood, so he could never remember him, but in My heart ached when I lost him.

He squandered Yang Ze's kindness to him wantonly, as if Yang Ze should stay by his side all his life, working hard like a wife for him to serve.But Yang Ze is also a person, and a person who is more sensitive and richer than others. Even if he loves him like life, he will be sad, sad and desperate. Song Jue's actions have turned into knives The bloody sharp blade will cut off a piece of Yang Ze's love for him every time.Even if Yang Ze's love goes deep into the sea, it will be brutally slaughtered and turned into nothingness that cannot be seen or heard.

If Song Jue was given a chance, he would use everything to save him.He will not provoke women outside again, he will obediently listen to Yang Ze's words, go to work and leave work obediently.Snuggle up on the couch with him and watch movies in your spare time or whisper conversations head to head, just like they did in college.He will no longer feel impatient and tired of him, and is willing to listen to his trivial complaints and cold jokes that make people laugh.

What used to be an ordinary thing has now become an unattainable dream.

Song Jue finally couldn't bear this kind of torture, and fled the house in a panic, not daring to look at anything left by Yang Ze.

He has settled down in the company, and his daily life is confined to the office building of NAE. It seems that everything outside has lost its appeal to him.

Qiao Ke left NAE a long time ago. With her appearance and family background, she didn't have to worry about finding a good man. It's just that Song Jue satisfied her in every way so she listened to her parents and came here. Of course, except for him. about a male lover.But among the rich people she knew, who wasn't wrong?Playing with men is nothing.

And she never thought that people like Yang Ze were qualified to compete with her, they were just Song Jue's plaything, and she was Song Jue's future wife.

So she just used a little trick to get rid of Yang Ze in anger. She thought that Song Jue would settle down and consider their marriage, but she didn't expect his attitude towards her to change 180 degrees. She was courteous and gentle before, but instead asked her why she did this ferociously!

What made her even more unbearable was that Song Jue actually kicked her out of the company, even if she offended her father!Qiao Ke left NAE with tears in her eyes. She didn't expect that she would lose to such an ordinary person, and even a man!

Because of this incident, Song Jue was scolded by his parents, Song Jue didn't care at all, he had already escaped from his parents' control, otherwise he wouldn't have come to Jiangzhou to go to university.

He has become a complete workaholic, and NAE's plan to move its headquarters to the imperial capital has won the approval of all shareholders through his efforts.As a conscientious and good boss, every day he would carefully check the itinerary given to him by the secretary, and then record each item in his heart.When he received the itinerary as usual that day, he suddenly remembered something when he looked at the date on it.

He remembered that Yang Ze would go back to his hometown to pay homage to his parents every year during the Ching Ming Festival, and he never fails every year.He once begged himself to go back with him and let his parents see him as a son-in-law, but Song Jue never agreed, he thought the trouble was unnecessary, and he didn't plan to spend his life with Yang Ze at that time.

Yang Ze's parents passed away early, so he didn't have the opportunity to be filial, but he is an extremely filial person, no matter what happens, he will go back to sweep the tomb unshakably on the day of Qingming.

What about this year?

Song Jue was so excited by this thought that he couldn't control himself. It was less than three days before Qingming Festival, and he wanted to leave immediately! !

On the same day, Song Jue took a plane, then a train, and then a car to Yang Ze’s hometown. This is a quaint town with an underdeveloped economy, but it is quiet and elegant. There are also several cultural relics, which have now been developed into tourist attractions. .

Song Jue was not interested in them. He found the tomb of Yang Ze's parents according to the cemetery that Yang Ze had mentioned in his memory. There was a photo of a young couple on it. Yang Ze looked more like his father, but he smiled The crooked eyebrows and eyes came from his mother. He looked at the photos of the Yang family couple, bowed deeply to them, and said with tears in his eyes, "I'm sorry..."

He found a guest house near the cemetery to live in, and he wanted to wait for Yang Ze to appear here, so what he had to do every day was to enter the cemetery, and then find an inconspicuous corner to sit down, because he was afraid of Yang Ze's appearance. Ze will run away as soon as he sees him.

He sat for a whole day, and the administrator of the cemetery regarded him as a freak, and wanted to leave him, but Song Jue gave him a handful of money, and then he went.

On the day of Qingming, Song Jue hid behind the camphor tree not far from the Yang couple with great anticipation and excitement, waiting nervously for Yang Ze to appear.

He has been away for more than a year, I don't know how he is doing this year, will Yang Ze be happier after leaving him?Or are you as reluctant to part with the past feelings as he is?

While Song Jue was looking forward to it, Yang Ze appeared in his line of sight. After not seeing him for a year, he was not as thin as he had imagined. Instead, he was a bit rounder, his skin was rosy, and he looked very healthy.

The lover whom he had missed for more than a year was right in front of him. Song Jue was so excited that he could not control himself. He heard the sound of his heart beating violently. Every pore in his body was clamoring for him to rush out and embrace Yang Ze again!

But he didn't.Because Yang Ze didn't come alone, he was accompanied by a gentle-looking woman, holding a baby in his arms.

Whose child is that?Who is that woman?

Song Jue gradually felt panic, because they looked so right, and their movements were so gentle and intimate, even more so than him and Yang Ze...

No matter who is shown, this is a very happy family of three.

Song Jue immediately denied this idea, no, Yang Ze will not find a woman to fall in love so soon, and have such a big child, it is impossible!He is born gay and has no interest in women!

The three of Yang Ze didn't notice Song Jue in the dark, and went straight to their parents' grave. They knelt there, placed the food and wine they brought in stacks in front of them, and then bowed deeply a few times.

After staring at the portraits of his parents for a while, Yang Ze didn't cry, but tears flowed from his eyes. The woman beside him touched his shoulders and comforted him softly.

The moment he saw Yang Ze crying, Song Jue felt extremely distressed, as if countless bayonets had been pierced into his heart. He wanted to rush out to hug Yang Ze and kiss away his tears, but when he saw the woman During the movement, the whole body stopped stiffly.

Yang Ze was hugged tenderly by the woman, she gently stroked Yang Ze's head, patted his back to calm him down, like a kindest mother and a virtuous wife.

Song Jue stared at the warm scene in front of him with wide eyes, and his whole body gradually became cold, as if he had fallen into a dark abyss.

But he didn't give up. It doesn't mean anything. Maybe it's just a relative of Yang Ze. After arriving here, he prepared a lot of excuses. He wanted to let Yang Ze know that he loves him no more than he loves himself. There is less love, but he is too dull and stupid, and it hurts him to be blinded by the feasting and feasting.He wanted to confess to him. If Yang Ze refused to forgive him, he would pester him. A soft-hearted person like Yang Ze would definitely be moved by him.

This time he wants to tell him that he wants to be with him forever, until they are old, unable to walk, and have lost all their teeth, and sit side by side in a park chair basking in the sun, recalling the moments that have happened in the past few decades bit by bit.

And all of this is based on the fact that Ze Yang still loves him.

What if he no longer has him in his heart, has fallen in love with someone else, or even started a family...

Song Jue didn't dare to think about it anymore...

"Dad, Daddy..."

The baby's immature voice came to mind in the quiet cemetery, and the crisp and high-pitched child's voice clearly cut through the air and reached Song Jue's ears.

No, this is not true! !Yang Ze, don't agree!Don't agree!

Hearing the child's call, Yang Ze wiped away his tears, lowered his head and kissed his forehead, and said, "Yangyang, be good, dad is fine."

In Song Jue's world, the only bright light went out, and his whole body was ashamed, his hands were covered with veins, and his whitish fingertips almost sank into the bark of the tree.

He saw the woman hugging the child in Yang Ze's arms, touching his face with a smile and saying, "Yang Yang is so good, I know I love my father."

Song Jue was thrown into hell, surrounded by raging red lotus karma, and the raging flames were dragging him into a bottomless black pool, making him unable to turn over forever.

He watched their family of three gradually go away, leaving only two smaller and smaller figures behind, his vision became more and more blurred, he wanted to see Yang Ze's figure clearly again, so he rubbed it with his hands, and his fingers touched It was cold and wet, and it turned out that his face was already covered with tears since he didn't know when.

Song Jue didn't know how he got back to the guest house. Along the way, his mind kept repeating Yang Ze's intimacy with that woman, and his gentle voice calling his son's nickname.His dream was completely shattered on this day. He thought that as long as he was sincere and patient enough, he could recover Yang Ze, but he found that no one was waiting for him, and Yang Ze was already striding towards the opposite world. , and in that world, there was no place for him, Song Jue.

Yang Ze had a very happy life, he no longer showed that uneasy expression and suspicious eyes, he had everything a normal man should have, and maybe he would never remember that in his life, there once appeared a man named Song Jue's man gave him the sweetest love and...the most unforgettable pain...

Song Jue did not choose to appear in front of Yang Ze, he had already lost the qualification to chase him back.Yang Ze resolutely left him like this, without giving him the slightest chance to repent and make amends.

That night, Song Jue was sobbing on the narrow bed in the small hotel. He was so uncomfortable that he curled up all over, like a boiled shrimp, and his tears soaked the bedding. The last evidence left.

Song Jue returned to Jiangzhou and became a high-ranking NAE director and CEO. His life was busy and fulfilling. He worked hard for the company, and all his subordinates were lucky to have such a good boss.

Such a capable and hardworking man is extremely attractive, especially when the man is young, handsome, and rich.They seemed to have unanimously forgotten his absurdity, and pursued him boldly and fanatically.Song Jue turned a blind eye to these things. He changed from a playboy to the most devout ascetic, isolated from all temptations in the world, and devoted himself to his career.

This situation didn't last long, when a man named Jin Ziyang appeared in front of him, he changed his mind, he accepted his pursuit, and everyone was surprised.

Because he was really an ordinary man, much inferior to the lovers Yang Ze and Song Jue had ever had.And there is nothing about him that looks like Ze Yang, even Tommy is puzzled.

Song Jue regarded him as a treasure, he bought a villa for the two of them, and devoted himself wholeheartedly to Jin Zi.As long as he is willing, he can be the most perfect lover in the world, he never does anything with Jin Ziyang, he pampers him, loves him, and treats him in every possible way.He even took him on various occasions and announced in a high-profile way that this is his Song Jue's lover.

No one could resist such tenderness, Jin Ziyang almost suffocated under his doting.But he broke up after three months.

When she heard the word break up, Song Jue didn't react at all, but asked calmly, "Why? Don't you love me?"

Jin Ziyang clenched his strength and tried to calm himself down, "I love you, love you very much, it's the first time in my life that I love someone so much. But it's because I love you that I can't stand you calling others on the bed every day. name!"

Song Jue was speechless. He heard Jin Ziyang continue to say: "Before we broke up, can you tell me why you chose me? I can feel that you don't love me."

Song Jue raised his head and looked into Jin Ziyang's eyes with complicated eyes. Jin Ziyang suddenly discovered that the expressiony eyes he thought were looking at others through him.

"Because the way you look at me is exactly the same as his." That kind of fanatical, unreserved enthusiasm, and crazy love like moths flying to a flame.

"And that Yang Ze... so it's like this..." Jin Ziyang smiled wryly, "I have a request, can you tell me about the relationship between me and him, let me know if I die, I want to know What kind of a substitute is it?"

Song Jue was silent for a moment, he didn't want to say it, because it would be as painful as peeling off a newly scabbed scar.

Perhaps it was because Jin Ziyang's gaze was too similar to Yang Ze, Song Jue couldn't help but opened his mouth, and for the first time, he showed this love that he regretted for the rest of his life in front of others.

After listening to his story, Jin Ziyang let out a long sigh of relief, "So that's the case, in fact, I... I'm lucky..."

He was unlucky, because he was only Yang Ze's stand-in from the beginning to the end; he was lucky, because Song Jue gave him everything that he had no time to compensate Yang Ze.

"Song Jue, goodbye..." Pulling up the suitcase, Jin Ziyang was about to leave the love nest that Song Jue had built for him. This place was just a pink foam castle that would disappear as soon as it came into contact with the sun.

Song Jue didn't hold him back, but just smiled at him, with a shocking sadness and loneliness in the smile.

Jin Ziyang hated him, but felt compassion for him because of this smile——

"Acquaintance, let me give you a final suggestion. If you say that Yang Ze is born purely gay, then he is unlikely to accept women. Even if he starts a family like a normal man, the marriage will not last long. I am here I have seen too many examples like this in the circle. I think you can try to find him, maybe he has returned to being single, if not, you still have hope. This is the end of my words, farewell, Song Jue."

He glanced at this man with nostalgia, and then strode away from the villa. After all, this man did not belong to him, and these three months were just a sweet dream.

Song Jue raised his head abruptly, and there was a faint fire in his stagnant eyes again.