Years of Intoxication

He Gu looked at Song Juhan's domineering look of "If you don't agree, there will be no end today", a burst of tiredness hit his heart.

He suddenly figured it out.

The thing he wanted all along was at his fingertips, so why deny it?Why not give it a try, try to see if it is really as beautiful as imagined, try how long Song Juhan can pretend for a few months, and how long he can bear him.

He guessed no more than three months.

Song Juhan was not born with the concept of single-mindedness. His background and family did not teach him this. After he grew up, he faced so many temptations. The promise of "not talking to others" is just a temporary condition for myself.

As for Song Juhan's "seriously being together", it is very pleasant to the ear, but he can't take it to heart.Because once he really believed in his heart that they were together, his possessiveness would completely devour them both, dragging himself into eternal doom.

He Gu stretched out his finger, gently rubbed Song Juhan's chin, and said lightly, "Okay."

Song Juhan suddenly smiled.He knew, he knew why he was reluctant to part with him, why he had always been too calm and stable, and making trouble like this occasionally was not interesting.He likes to see a different side of He Gu, so he especially likes to bully He Gu in bed, just to make this man show an expression that others can't see.

"But... since you promised me, you have to keep your promise." He Gu's dark pupils were like a bottomless lake, "If you sleep with someone else, we will be completely over."

Song Juhan said arrogantly: "I promised you, and I will do it naturally." He pressed the back of He Gu's head, lowered his head, and gently pressed his lips.

He Gu blinked his eyes, feeling that the kiss was a bit bitter.

This scene seems to have been similar, by the way, it was not the case six years ago.

It's just that at that time, he used the name of "playing" in order to stay with Song Juhan. This time, he was serious...seriously intending to "play".

Because Song Juhan must be the first to break the agreement, as long as he plays with him for the last time, Song Juhan will have no reason to force him to stay, and it is also considered as the last moment, fulfilling his long-term wish.

Song Juhan still didn't go back in the end, and forced him to sleep with him until dawn before sneaking away.Fortunately, Sun Qing went back to Shencheng to deal with business that day, otherwise she would definitely run into each other.

With the end of the spring break, the heat of the news finally began to dissipate, and the fans and reporters gathered around the hotel door also disappeared.

Why did he stay at home for almost three weeks, and one day he finally mustered up the courage and decided to go for a walk.

He put on his overcoat and sunglasses, and when he went downstairs, he felt an unstoppable guilty conscience when he met a fellow passenger in the elevator.

Walking slowly along the street, he found that no one paid special attention to him. He tried to take off his sunglasses to see the scenery of early spring more clearly.This is the most beautiful time of the year in the capital city. It would be a pity not to see it when the chill is still there and life is emerging.

Pedestrians come and go, but there are no pictures of being pointed at by people as imagined for any reason. Turn off the computer and TV, it seems that the whole world is clean, no one knows him, no one pays attention to him, no one will put too much His mind was on a topic that was outdated.

He Gu couldn't help laughing at himself, he was so mediocre.

He went to eat by himself, watched a movie, and then found a cafe to read a book. At the same time, he called his immediate boss and wanted to talk to him about his resignation alone.

That afternoon, he had a meal with his boss. He was open-minded and calm, and ended his nearly seven-year career in Nanchuang without a few words.

Even though he had made enough mental preparations, He Gu still felt sad. His youth and sweat in Nanchuang ended helplessly at this moment. How could he not feel sad.

The boss said that the company would give him double the year-end bonus, plus an extra three months of salary settlement, whether it was for his fucking face, or out of affirmation of his hard work over the years, or thanks to him for walking so cleanly, In short, the company did not treat him badly.

He Gu asked Chen Shan to help him tidy up the office, go through the resignation procedures, and hand over the work to his successor alone. It is impossible for him to go back.

He suddenly thought of GuQingPei, when GuQingPei left, he ate countless meals just after we broke up, so high-spirited and so promising.As for him, he couldn't even say goodbye to his former colleagues, and didn't even have the guts to go back to the company to take a look, so he just left in such a desperate manner.

This is all thanks to Song Juhan.

After resigning, He Gu called GuQingPei, wanting to make an appointment for a chat.

GuQingPei, who has been actively trying to dig him out, is in a bad state at this time, saying that something happened to the company, and apologizing to him one after another, obviously everything is unknown now.

He Gu was a little worried, and asked Gu Qing Pei what was wrong, but Gu Qing Pei refused to say anything.

With GuQingPei's character, it must not be a trivial matter to be able to embarrass him like this, and he can't hide it, so why didn't he ask any more questions, instead he comforted him a bit.Although he intends to go to GuQingPei's place, he doesn't want to join the job right away, it happens that he can rest for a while and wait and see.

He Gu contacted the decoration company and officially started to renovate his old house.The house was small, and the construction period was expected to be no more than two months. He Gu was very relieved of the foreman who had worked with him many times, and handed over the house to him. He bought a plane ticket and went to Shanghai.

He got off the plane, and as soon as he turned on his phone, a row of missed calls popped up, all from Song Juhan, and he replied a text message: What's wrong?

Song Juhan's call quickly came after him: "Where did you go? Why did you turn off the phone?"

"By plane, I'll come to Shanghai to see my mother."

Song Juhan seemed relieved: "When will you come back?"

"Not sure, in two days."

"My dad finally stopped looking for someone to watch me. You should come back early to accompany me."

"it is good."

"When is 'Good' coming back?"

"I'm not so sure."

"Two days."

He Gu said: "I'm really not sure."

Song Juhan snorted on the phone: "Forget it." After speaking, he hung up the phone.

He Gu didn't care, it would be scary if Song Juhan suddenly changed his sex.

He Gu took a taxi, went to the hotel where he stayed last time, and had dinner with his mother and Su Su at night.

Although Su Su is usually naughty and carefree, but this time she is unexpectedly sensible, she doesn't mention a word about the news that caused a lot of noise a while ago, as if nothing happened, she sits in He Gu's arms and gives him Watch videos of myself singing and dancing, and photos of skiing in Switzerland.

It wasn't until Sun Qing went out to answer the phone that Susu whispered, "Brother, is Song Juhan really your boyfriend?"

He Gu touched her head: "No."

Susu looked at him, her eyes were shining, she obviously didn't believe it, after all he had lied about Song Juhan, and he probably didn't have much credibility in this matter.

He Gu said helplessly: "It's really not." The word "boyfriend" always seemed funny when it was put between them.

"Then do you like him?" Susu said yearningly, "I like him too, he is so handsome."

"Yeah." He Gu smiled, "But he doesn't like me."

Su Su was startled, then frowned, and said angrily, "He must have bad eyesight."

Why was she amused.

"Brother, after you resign, will you come to Shanghai?"

"I still do not know."

"You come."

He Gu thinks of GuQingPei, he has some hesitation at this moment, if GuQingPei really can't go there, does he really want to come here?At least there are relatives here...

He Gu shook his head: "I'm going to rest for a while before making plans."

Back at the hotel at night, He Gu washed up and was about to go to bed when the doorbell rang.

He called out, "Who is it?"

"Guest room."

He Gu was stunned for a moment, this voice could not be... He jumped out of bed and opened the door.

Song Juhan had a wicked smile on his lips, and looked at him leisurely.

"You, how are you..."

"It's not easy to check the hotel you're staying in." Song Juhan hugged him, "Who told you to run so far, I had no choice but to come to you."

Afraid of being seen by others, He Gu quickly retreated to the room and closed the door: "Why do you dare to fly now, you are not recognized?"

"That's why I didn't take the plane. I took the high-speed rail. My back hurts to death." Song Juhan stretched his slender torso, "I covered my face completely. If everyone recognizes this, it will definitely open my eyes."

He Gu looked at Song Juhan's dusty appearance, and couldn't tell what it was like.The moment he saw Song Juhan, he really felt a little pleasantly surprised.

"I'm going to take a shower." Song Juhan bowed his head and kissed him, then said ambiguously, "Wait for me."

He Gu didn't respond much, and he didn't let out a breath until Song Juhan entered the bathroom.He originally planned to live in Shencheng for ten days and half a month to see if he could adapt to the climate and environment here, but now it seems that he can't live for a few days.

Song Juhan took a quick shower, then threw himself on the bed, pressed He Gu under his body, and kissed him intimately: "Did you just take a shower too, it smells so good."

"Ah."

"It was prepared for me." Song Juhan chuckled twice, teasing He Gu.

He Gu hadn't done it for a long time, and his body felt a little restless. Now he really wanted to enjoy sex to the fullest.

Song Juhan mobilized He Gu's desire very patiently today, no one knew He Gu's body better than him, and could control the ups and downs of this person better.

The two of them spent the whole night together, like a extinguished flame rekindled, threatening to start a prairie fire.Why did he sink infinitely in the sea of ​​desire, and finally almost lost himself...

When he woke up the next day, He Gu was so tired that he could hardly move his body. He hadn't indulged in this way for a long time, and the sequelae were quite obvious.

Song Juhan also woke up, hugged him and kissed him: "Are you hungry?"

He Gu's eyes were too swollen to open, and he nodded slowly.

Song Juhan picked up the microphone at the bedside and asked the hotel to deliver two breakfasts.

He Gu struggled to remember, but as soon as he moved, he gasped in pain.

Song Juhan chuckled twice: "I'm tired...have you neglected to exercise? I used to have better physical strength than this."

Why didn't want to answer, he wanted to take a bath.

"Okay, I wiped it for you yesterday, just lie down." Song Juhan pulled him back into his arms, stroked his smooth back, "We won't go out today."

"No." He Gu opened his mouth, his throat was hoarse, he thought of everything last night, and suddenly his ears turned red, "My mother..."

"Aren't you going to stay for a few days? Just say that you went to see your friends today. How can you see your mother when you look like this?"

He Gu bumped his swollen head against the pillow, indeed, no matter how he looks like this, he might not be able to walk easily.

Song Juhan rubbed his temples: "Is it uncomfortable? I'll massage for you."

Why is the body stiff.

Has Song Juhan ever been so tender to him?It's just embarrassing.

"I often think..." Song Juhan said while rubbing, "What were you thinking during those few days in the detention center, and what were you thinking when you promised to take the blame for me."

Why are you silent.

"Why, do you think I treat you well?"

He Gu said numbly, "Okay."

"Don't pretend, I know you have resentment in your heart, you are like this, what you think, you would rather vomit blood than say it. If you don't say it, how will I know that you are sad, how will I know what you want."

He Gu bit his trembling lips lightly.

Song Juhan buried his face into his neck, his voice was lazy and soft, almost coquettish, "Over the years, I have met so many people, but you are the only one who is sincere to me, and you are the only one who doesn't want anything from me. This time Let's be together well, what I didn't give you before, I will make it up to you now. So your heart and your eyes can only be placed on me."

He Gu wanted to make an excuse, but he didn't know what to say. After realizing many times that he and Song Juhan had huge differences in personality and three views, and Song Juhan was only interested in sleeping with him, he gave up. communicate.

Now even if I want to communicate, I don't know where to start.

Communication does not happen overnight, just like a congested pipeline, it is impossible to clear it all at once. He talks too little and thinks too much. It's not just a matter of personality, but Song Juhan didn't bother to listen even if he said it in the past.

Now... Song Juhan can be whatever he says, right or wrong, it doesn't matter at all.

The hotel waiter brought two breakfasts, Song Juhan pulled He Gu up, smiled and pinched his nose, "Honey, do you want me to feed you?"

"No need." He Gu's cheeks were a little hot. When Song Juhan wanted to be nice to others, he was so brilliant that he couldn't ignore it at all.

Song Juhan put the breakfast on the table, went to the bed and wanted to hug He Gu, He Gu stood up quickly, but his legs became weak and his body slid down steeply.

Song Juhan grabbed his waist and smiled ambiguously: "It's not my fault." He leaned close to He Gu's ear and whispered, "It's your fault that you keep biting me."

He Gu coughed lightly, managed to stand still, pushed Song Juhan away, and walked to the table step by step.

That pain and soreness was embarrassing.

Song Juhan was in a great mood, and he brought some food for He Gu. He Gu was really hungry, so he buried his head in eating.

Halfway through the meal, Song Juhan's cell phone rang. He looked at the screen, frowned, and answered the phone reluctantly: "Hello?"

He Gu couldn't hear what was being said on the phone, but he could hear Song He's voice.

"Are you going to keep me tied at home? What's wrong with me going out to relax." Song Juhan said in a rather angry tone.

"What are you doing at home? There's no announcement, I'm more free than a dog right now."

"How can I recognize it? Can you eat me!" Song Juhan hung up the phone, turned off the phone, and threw it aside.

He why looked at him.

Song Juhan took a deep breath: "Eat."

He Gu thought for a while and asked, "What's going on over there?"

"What can I do? All work has stopped and I have lost a lot of money."

Song Juhan said it nonchalantly, but the frustration of falling from a height must be very hard, especially for someone like Song Juhan whose life is so smooth.

"Have you been banned?"

Song Juhan patted his hair irritably: "It's okay. After all, the incident is quite big, and the country is now looking for models. We just ran into each other. My name is not on the red head file, but Ah Sheng and the others are both. My people, my parents let me hide from the limelight, and there won't be any public activities in the past few months."

"Have they sentenced Ah Sheng?"

"Hurry up, squat for at least half a year, it's basically useless when you come out, and you can turn behind the scenes at most, but my dad doesn't want to use him anymore. I told him several times not to touch that thing, but he didn't listen, and now he's being tricked by his wife. It’s so fucking implicating so many people.” Song Juhan became more and more angry as he spoke, his fists clenched tightly.

He Gu didn't know how to comfort Song Juhan, because he was a victim himself, but it was useless to blame Han Sheng, the law would punish him.

Song Juhan looked at He Gu and said in a low voice, "I shouldn't have brought them to your place."

He Gu sighed: "I really can't figure it out, why did you take them to my place?"

Song Juhan lowered his head and said with some guilt: "Who told you to ignore me during that time, I just thought, if I bring so many people there, you will always give me face."

Why can't laugh or cry.

Song Juhan remembered something: "Why didn't you register for that house?"

He Gu was silent for a while: "It's not necessary."

"What is unnecessary?"

"Anyway, we live here."

Song Juhan was not very happy: "I can't live there. I'll give you a loft in the city center. Now it's almost a soft outfit. When I go back..."

"No need." He Gu looked up at him with clear eyes, "I have resigned from Nanchuang and plan to move back to my parents' house."

Song Juhan frowned: "How old is that old house? It's older than you."

"I redecorated."

"I seem to have gone there to find you once before, right? It's small and dilapidated, surrounded by residential areas mixed with fish and dragons. Why do you live in that kind of place? If you don't like living in the city, I'll buy you one in the suburbs." villa."

"Ji Han." He Gu looked at him seriously, "House, car, clothes, watch, these things don't matter to me, I don't feel comfortable taking things from you, I feel uncomfortable all the time, just I was afraid that you would be unhappy, so I didn't say anything."

Song Juhan showed an incomprehensible expression, "Why, you are almost thirty, as for playing with pure love, let alone what are these. I, Song Juhan, never treat my people badly, so don't take this It’s okay to take things too seriously.”

He Gu said calmly: "I'm also a man, not to mention I don't need anyone to support me, can you understand that's all, I won't live in your house anymore."

"Why are you so stubborn!"

He Gu continued: "I'll drive your car first, anyway, it won't sell for a lot of money if it's depreciated, and you definitely won't want it, so don't waste it."

Song Juhan was annoyed: "Who cares about a car, why do you and I figure it out so clearly!" Even though He Gu reconciled with him, he always felt that there was something missing between the two of them, no, it should be said, a lot was missing thing.He Gu is more silent and dull than before. Except on the bed, he usually doesn't look at him directly, but he doesn't know what to do. Whenever he asks a question, He Gu will definitely use words, eyes, movements, etc. All expressions, tell him "nothing".

nothing?Fuck nothing!

What he wants is not this kind of why, but the previous one, the kind and gentle why, but the more he wants it, the more difficult it seems to be to grasp, obviously it has been combined countless times, it is obviously within reach, But he still felt that why was he staying away from him, little by little, but firmly away from him.

That powerlessness made him deeply angry.

He Gu lowered his head and took a sip of the soup, then said flatly, "It's better to figure it out."

Song Juhan dropped his chopsticks: "What on earth do you mean? Do you want to draw a line with me?"

He Gu was silent for a while: "You said you want to be serious together, didn't you?"

"Of course."

"Then we start out as equals."

Song Juhan sneered: "I let you live in a better place, why is it unequal? ​​Your thinking is so poor."

"Maybe." He Ge was not annoyed.

Song Juhan felt the feeling of hitting the cotton with his fist again, without any effort at all, which made people feel very blocked.He gritted his teeth and looked at He Gu, really wanting to bite.

He Gu said: "Let's eat, the food should be cold."

Song Juhan rolled his eyes: "I don't want to eat." After speaking, he nestled on the sofa and played mobile games.

He Gu looked at Song Juhan's huffing back, hesitated for a moment, walked over, and stroked his back: "Come and eat."

Song Juhan looked up at him, his eyes were angry and wronged: "I am doing it for your own good, why are you so ignorant of good and bad?"

"I know."

"You know what a fart, you are deliberately against me."

"I don't mean that, let's eat."

Song Juhan hesitated for a moment, but returned to the table.

Seeing Song Juhan's childish look, He Gu wanted to laugh.

Song Juhan said angrily: "What are you laughing at? You feed me."

He Gu picked up a chopstick to scramble the egg and brought it to his mouth.

Song Juhan opened his mouth and ate it.

After a few mouthfuls of feeding, Song Juhan's mood improved a lot.

Song Juhan has such a character, his temper comes quickly, urgently, and ruthlessly, but it also goes away quickly.

He Gu often feels that Song Juhan is a child who hasn't grown up inside, with a child's unique and innocent cruelty, even if he hurts others, he doesn't know it, he doesn't care, and he doesn't shy away from it.

The two stayed in Shencheng for five days, and when He Gu went to accompany his mother and sister, Song Juhan stayed in the hotel and sent messages urging him to come back.

Those few days were really warm and sweet.Song Juhan is trying his best to express his tenderness and romance. Why did he know that apart from not being able to talk to each other, Song Juhan is very capable of falling in love. When the two first met, Song Juhan could make him sleep all night with just a few words Don't you realize, after many years, he once again experienced the invincible charm of Song Juhan.

Only this time he was no longer dizzy, he was enjoying it soberly, enjoying Song Juhan's goodness, he felt that it was very pleasant, he was looking forward to what he had been longing for for so long, it was indeed very good.

Although he doesn't want it so desperately anymore.