Continuously

From the window, the lights on the third floor have been turned off.The room was dark, and a blanket covered Yao Jianqi's head, which also blocked the light from the desk lamp. He turned over a page of the book and squeezed the palm of his hand hard.

He knew that Yu Wan would come up quietly to see if he was asleep, and instead of knocking on the door, he would just look at the light in the crack of the door. Every night around twelve o'clock, he would turn off the fluorescent lamp on time, and then read by the lamp light until three o'clock in the morning, He goes to bed when he thinks enough is enough, and sometimes when he is too tired, he will consciously or unconsciously lie on the table for a while, at least for a few minutes, and at most for one night.

Tomorrow the school will have a monthly holiday and there will be no classes. He is late at school for self-study, and when he comes back, there is no one at home and no cat.

The cat was sent back to Anding Village last week, leaving a drying box empty there, and it was normal for Yu Wan and Yao Xinping to go out to socialize.

So, he sat alone on the top floor, and suddenly the whole building was filled with darkness.

The pain in the palm of his hand did not bring about the sobriety he imagined, and his exhaustion was like water horses blown by the wind, falling towards him one by one, turbulent like a premeditated plan.At the last moment, Yao Jianqi reached for the desk lamp and touched the button, but he only turned the light up by one gear, but that was no longer within the range of his preconsciousness.

But he still had the strength to dream.

He dreamed that someone lifted his blanket, like a corner of the night, the desk lamp finally became silent, he was hugged by a pair of tough hands, squeezed to the point that his blood vessels would jump when pressed, even so he did not wake up.

Then he was covered with a fluffy quilt, but the man didn't lie in the same way, but he could feel the flood season and the fog on his body, otherwise, how could he explain that there were raindrops falling on his shoulders, and how could he explain , Even in a dream, I can feel such a loving love.

Yao Jianqi opened his eyes vigorously, but was deeply buried by his palms. The man said, "Sleep, sleep, I will hold you."

The sound of the car door being slammed into the courtyard resounded, Grandma Yao came out in response, holding a bamboo dustpan, still swearing: "Hands and feet are always indifferent."

Yao An didn't lock the car door, stepped over, and picked up a dried wild jujube from the sieve, the skin was prickly like a piece of moss.

"Damn old woman!" Grandpa Yao ran out with a loud voice, carrying an inflatable neck brace.

Seeing this, Yao An didn't care to bite his mouth, and then frowned at grandma, "Why don't you wear a neck brace?"

"Your grandpa and grandson are so verbose." Grandma Yao turned her head disdainfully, "I don't know what to do?"

"It's strange if you have it!" Grandpa Yao was annoyed at every bridge of the nose, "Hurry up and put it on, don't be silly!"

Grandma Yao glared at him obediently, Shau Kei pushed it to Yao An, Dama stood with her sword on her hips, and let Grandpa Yao tie a collar for him.

"Didn't sleep well last night?" Grandma Yao raised her neck and chatted with her grandson, "The dark circles under your eyes fell to the ground."

"Where did it fall, I'll pick it up." Yao An threw another jujube.

"You are the only one who is poor." Grandma Yao swept the dust off his shoulders, "Why did you come back again? You are such a grown-up, do you think you still miss home?"

Yao An chewed the sweet and sour jujube meat, his teeth ached from the sourness: "I miss you."

"You too—hey!" Grandma Yao suddenly said, "Damn old man, it's too tight!"

Grandpa Yao, who was twisting the traction knob, responded bluntly: "Whatever you yell, it's all from the doctor, listen to the doctor!"

Yao An picked out his ears, gradually moved away from the center of the sound range, and casually placed the bamboo sieve on the table near the door.

Starting from the low toilet in the west, he searched room by room, bending over like Yao Jianqi usually did, and whispering meow in his mouth.

He propped up his knees to inspect the back of each door and the foot of the bed, until he reached the easternmost woodshed, which was empty.

Yao An had no choice but to walk the same way again, moving more slowly, and finally found it at the foot of a lacquered cabinet in a passing room.

Half of the mother cat's body was buried in an orchid-shaped flocked slipper, with a round bag bulging on the upper, and the kitten went nowhere.

Yao An squatted down, pushed aside the slippers next to him, held the one out, caught it with his left arm, and slowly pulled it out, letting the cat fall into his arms.

The cat called Ai Ai, weakly.

Yao An hugged it, smoothed out its dry hair, and walked to their paper nest. The bowl next to it with shallow slits on the surface was full of broken chicken.

"Why didn't you eat anything?" Yao An rubbed it, and the cat then licked Yao An's little finger a few times.

"You can't do this, you." He picked up the cat, barely touching the tip of his nose, "Do you know how much Yao Jianqi likes you? You have to stay with him."

"He used to like fish, the one I caught. He could watch it all day by the tank, but now he doesn't like fish anymore."

"Tell me, is he..."

Yao An fell silent, and looked at Mao Mao face to face.

Does he have the deepest attachment to every thing he likes and leaves him in the end?

When she walked in the door, grandma was startled because of a big black shadow on the ground.

She bent down and hugged Xinna's two pairs of cotton slippers of the same size: "What's the matter, the pants are all dirty."

"I'm fine, grandma." Yao An comforted him but refused to lift his face from the cat's belly, "I'll be fine later, I... will be fine later."

The cat was gradually put back into his arms, and he sat on the ground, unable to stand up after a long time.

Not long ago, Yao An went downstairs to buy breakfast in a low voice, but at the door of his house he met a man who was looking inside.

The other party recognized him first, and asked tremblingly, "Are you Yao Jianqi's brother?"

"We have seen it before, when we were sketching, and at the bus station of No. [-] Middle School, you left without waiting for the bus." Liu Miaobing explained.

then.

She nodded and shook her head all the way, and her originally tense emotions became more and more out of control amidst the sentences of sorry.

She said that she just broke their kiss accidentally, and it was her fault to take the photo and send it to her classmates to gossip, but she never thought that the other party would be exposed.

She also said that she never wanted to see Yao Jianqi being splashed with paint in the school exam, but he would be affected so much when he came back.

"sorry Sorry……"

Liu Miaobing's face is full of torment and tiredness, if possible, she would rather have less conscience.

"I didn't mean to... I never thought it would be this serious..."

And Yao An did not speak from the beginning to the end.

He just became more and more at a loss, even a little bit at a loss, so many facts that he didn't know crushed him massively, making him want to punch this fucking world but didn't know where to throw it.

Finally he squeezed out a word between his teeth.

"roll."

Yao Jianqi had the best sleep in days.

He didn't hear the bell, but he woke up naturally, lying on his side, in a posture of being in his arms, the velvet curtains were closed, and the cassia seed pillow filled with herbal fragrance, all kinds of things, so strange that he didn't dare to be alarmed.

After a vague period of confusion, he reached for the downed electronic alarm clock, and when he saw the two-digit time, he immediately lifted the quilt, sat up straight, and checked the time again.

It's almost noon.

Yao Jian Qiru got a slap in the face, rolled out of bed, hurriedly rushed to the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face, the mirror was wet, he hurriedly hung up the towel to dry, and ran downstairs.

"Why don't you call me..."

Both voice and footsteps stopped on the last flight of steps.

Yao An was sitting at the dining table directly opposite the stairs, his profile swayed imperceptibly, and he didn't look at him.

On the opposite side, Yu Wan pushed away the chair, stood up slowly, and let out a soft sigh.

"Let's have a good chat." After saying this, she picked up the car keys on the table and left.

There were only the two of them in the huge room.

The long ladder is like a blank space, too dense to speak without dispelling it.

Yao An clenched his hands under the table, stood up vigorously, and at the same time as he took a few steps, a blue shadow almost flew into his arms.

Lightness, but with a suppressed weight, knocked him against the wine cabinet behind him.

Yao Jianqi put his palm against the black bottle mouth, and hugged him, pushing the bottle that was about to fall from Yao An's left shoulder back to the solid wood wine case little by little, while his lips were buried on Yao An's neck, and he said in a murmur, "I thought it was time to drink again." Dreaming."

At that time, Yao An clearly heard it, he let Yao Jianqi circle him tighter and tighter, while he restrained the urge to hug him fiercely.

The berry-flavored wine leaked out from the bottle hole, and they were also infected with this smell. After a long time, Yao Jianqi was finally willing to let go of him a little bit, and face to face, the original question suddenly intensified before seeing the red blood in his eyes: okay?"

Yao An's cheeks were combed by his fingers, and he opened his teeth, because he was too nostalgic and reluctant to end everything so quickly.

"Are you tired?" Yao Jianqi asked with concern.

And what about his own exhaustion?

Never worth mentioning.

Yao An stared at him, because he was too close to see clearly or for other reasons, he closed his eyes that had been open all night, and his forehead drooped deeply.

"Very tired." Yao An breathed tremblingly, "I'm really tired..."

The fingers on the side of his face were burned by his breath, and after a pause, Yao Jianqi called him cautiously: "Yao An?"

Since when did I feel so anxious and excited even hearing him call my own name?

"I can't take it anymore, I don't want to...don't want to be so tired again."

That was probably a long time ago, even before I even noticed it.

I just fell in love with him.

Yao An raised his face and said with all his strength.

"let's break up."