Gluttonous canteen

"Hey, brother, don't yell, there are only two of us in this private room, don't yell so miserably, as if I'm bullying you, I don't have an ID card." Zhang Tao saw through the private room door just now The clerk who helped Hu Yiji in looked inside curiously, and hurried forward to appease Hu Yiji, for fear of causing unnecessary misunderstanding.

"Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo." Hu Yiji had finished venting his excitement now, and he had almost calmed down, but he would twitch from time to time.

"Big brother, you don't know, they have been laughing at me, no one believes that I have the blood of a fox, but I know in my heart that I am indeed a descendant of the great fox, but it is because of this blood that our family has been mixed until now Such a destitute situation, woo woo woo."

Hu Yiji was almost drunk by Zhang Tao, and now he is going through the life stage of telling the truth after drinking.

It's almost there, Zhang Tao thought to himself, if I can get something real this time, it's not in vain for me to spend so much money on dinner.Zhang Tao made up his mind, with a friendly smile of a caring brother all over his face, and gently patted Hu Yiji's belch.

"Brother, don't worry, speak slowly."

"This is a long story. No one knows exactly when it happened, but the stories passed down from the ancestors always have to count up to six or seven generations, and it happened in the Qing Dynasty at the latest. " Hu Yiji squinted his dim drunken eyes, stretched out his fingers and counted flickeringly, but after counting several times, there was no result, so he had to give up.

"At that time, my ancestor was a scholar, but it was a pity that he didn't even catch a fart in ten years of poverty." Hu Yiji drank a few cups of yellow soup, and there was no one who knew him, and even his own ancestors complained.

"Later, I lived in a ruined temple. I sold some poems and essays. I also wrote home letters for others. I helped them read home letters. They tested Chinese characters, tried divination, and looked for minor ailments." Hu Yiji rubbed his temples with both hands, feeling dizzy. He said with his head full, as if he was still struggling to think about whether his ancestors had done any other business.

"Senior Brother, I dare to say that your ancestors opened a house of all things." Zhang Tao couldn't help but spit out, thinking that your ancestors worked so hard to make money with multiple jobs. If you haven't made a fortune yet, you can only accept your fate. Yes.

"Hey, you don't know. In ancient times, there were not many scholars with few skills, and there were not many people who could read. There were not a few people who also did fortune-telling and medical treatment. After all, literacy was a big thing at that time. Scholars learned medical books and photo books. It is indeed more convenient than ordinary people to come."

Zhang Tao nodded. The ancient people’s subject classification was far less trivial and delicate than the modern people. The truth is similar in China and foreign countries. He remembered that when the Da Vinci Code was the most popular a few years ago, the TV station specially broadcast the life of this great god. Deeds, dare to say that he is not only an artist, but also a scientist and writer, that is, in such an era when knowledge was relatively monopolized, if a person dared to bear so many titles now, no one would have been covered by a scarf Spray dead.

"Then what happened next?" Zhang Tao asked.

"Then one day in the middle of the night, a person suddenly came to the ruined temple!" Hu Yiji's eyes widened suddenly, looking straight at Zhang Tao.

"I said brother, we are all old cousins ​​who run the rivers and lakes together, so you don't have to show your face, okay?" Zhang Tao rolled his eyes and yawned.

"Well, professional habits, professional habits, big brother, please forgive me." Hu Yiji shrugged his shoulders, expressing embarrassment.

"My ancestor opened the door, and the young man in brocade clothes came. He said he came to see a doctor. Guess what the symptoms are?"

Zhang Tao held his cheeks and thought for a while, the beautiful young man in brocade clothes is just a good-looking and rich second generation, similar to the character Xiao Fei in Lao Pao Er.

"Feel like your body has been hollowed out?" Zhang Tao asked tentatively.

"Go, Shaohun from the children's family said, that's my grandma!" Hu Yiji taught Zhang Tao a serious lesson even though he was drunk like a dead dog because it was about his ancestors.

The beautiful young man in brocade clothes is your grandma, do you really think your ancestor is Wan Baylor?Boys and boys are completely unscientific, okay?Zhang Tao vomited in his heart, and then he thought about it, several of his gay friends had babies, so it was fucking embarrassing.

"Brother, are you sure that person is a boy or a girl?"

"Boys and girls are not all the same, that is the real body of the Great Immortal Fox. Whether people want to be a man or a woman depends on their mood today." Hu Yiji said quite proudly.

Well, I never thought that the Fox Fairy had such a personality. Zhang Tao remembered seeing a girl on a scarf before, and felt that he had both a man's side and a woman's side, so the first thing he did after getting up every morning was to experience it. I am a man or a woman today, because my makeup skills are comparable to changing my head, and I can really manage both genders very well. At that time, Zhang Tao couldn’t worship her after watching her makeup tutorial. I didn’t expect that the fox fairy n many years ago There is such an advanced modern consciousness.

"Okay, please continue."

"My grandma was seriously ill at the time. My ancestor showed him for a while, and found that this beautiful young man was suffering from lovesickness." Hu Yiji said, it seemed that pink bubbles appeared on the old face that had experienced many vicissitudes. , Zhang Tao was taken aback for a while, wondering why he was so excited to tell the story of the previous generation as a descendant.

"Brother, don't tell me that the object of your grandma's crush is the ancestor of your down-and-out scholar?"

"That's what happened. There is a family living behind the ruined temple, which is the fox cave of grandma and grandma. Don't look at my ancestors living in such a desolate way, but he is a handsome young man with a height of eight feet and a tree facing the wind. .” Hu Yiji puffed out his chest with a heroic face.

No way, then how did the gene mutation pass to your generation?Zhang Tao looked at Hu Yiji's big face that looked like a fat rat, and he was puzzled. However, from the appearance of Miss Xiu'er, it seemed that only Hu Yiji's generation showed unusual recessive genes. , other people should still be quite normal.

Zhang Tao sighed in his heart about the old-fashioned thinking of the ancients. In modern times, if he really has a handsome face that can confuse even a fox fairy, he can make a debut, hold a concert, play a TV series, etc. Yes, the ticket is not big drop?If you really can’t do it, go to the clubhouse and do oil pushing. Xiang Cheng can do it, so why are you a poor student who is poor and smelly?

"Okay, let's get to the point." Zhang Tao had a premonition that the descendants of the Great Fox Immortal must have inherited some kind of romantic gene from their ancestors, and the story would be long-winded. A nickname is Hu Yiji.

Sure enough, Zhang Tao's advice didn't have any special effect, and Hu Yiji still talked about the long storytelling with snot and tears, and Zhang Tao could only listen to it patiently. They bravely came together despite the secular obstacles.

In line with the traditional idea of ​​taboo for the venerable, Hu Yiji only mentioned that the grandma's natal family brought out many good things to help the couple settle down, and also subsidized his ancestor to continue his studies. , Wenyun went to Beijing to catch the exam, a story was told from noon to night.

Zhang Tao looked at Hu Yiji, whose voice was already smoking, and suddenly realized that he was clever but was mistaken by his cleverness. He dared to talk so well, just to drag the time until night, and want to mess around again. Money for a meal?

After ordering four dishes and one soup, watching Hu Yiji gobble it up, Zhang Tao somewhat believed that this guy had a recessive gene of beastism in his blood, otherwise normal humans would not be able to eat it like this, he looked pitifully , and ordered the clerk to deliver a table of dinner to Hu Yiji's home, and by the way, he paid the bill with the lunch portion.

"Brother, I'm being benevolent enough this time. You've talked so much before, so it's not kind to not tell the ending. Why did you cry like that just now? What did you say grandma didn't want?" If he harms his family, since he is a sex lover, logically speaking, he shouldn't kill the person he likes."

Zhang Tao respects himself and others, and his master also likes his face and abs very much. Although he is laid off now, it is not as good as the capital of the princes in the previous Fenghuo drama. He still uses the money earned from part-time work to buy men's skin care products and cologne for himself. Thinking about it, that grandma wouldn't have treated this young man wrongly.

"Ah... hiccup!" Hu Yiji sighed, then hiccupped again, sat there for a while, slowly healed the short-term memory blank caused by overeating, and finally opened the chat box in a secretive manner. .

It is not the same as Zhang Tao's expected major themes such as aliens invading the earth, zombies besieging the city, and the fox mother-in-law beating mandarin ducks with a stick. This is just a tragic love story between an ordinary scumbag and a warm man.

Because Hu Yiji's ancestors were famous, he couldn't give his male ticket a traditional phoenix coronet, and because many bosses who couldn't offend wanted to give him the fat girl who was addicted to the Internet at home. This supermodel-like little fresh meat caused the other party's Yali, who couldn't stand the world, finally changed his mind.

However, it is not the same as Zhang Tao imagined that the fox fairy sat on the ground like a courgette and wailed and found the leader of the scumbag unit to report him as gay. The penny of their family and the litter of smart and beautiful mixed-race babies they gave birth to were all left untouched to the scumbag's family. household.

Just when the whole family of the scumbag was rejoicing, preparing to tidy up the new house, buy furniture, and marry a drama-addicted girl, strange incidents happened one after another in his family, and the beginning of all the strange incidents was from the fairy fox. Speaking of a few children.