Summertime

In the deep night, the asphalt road is empty, there are few vehicles passing by, all the streets seem to be asleep, there is little sound, the bright street lights are still supporting the spirit, insisting on working, and the logistics trucks walking at night are crushed by the street lights The brightly illuminated road surface left behind a series of rectangular black shadows, making a clumsy roar.

A dark blue Jeep passed through the shadow of the huge truck ahead and disappeared at the right end of the intersection ahead.

It’s still a very familiar route, it’s still early in the morning, it’s still the same destination, it’s still sending a drunk person home.

Only this time, the time was different, and the drunk people were different.

Su Xi in May is a woman, and Zhou Mi in August is a man.

Both of them are related to jujube, subtly and secretly related.

The last time was the beginning of everything, will this time be the end?

Less than four months, the time is really short, but the shortness may also have the advantages of being short.

At two o'clock in the morning, outside the quiet and drowsy small garden, Xi Zao handed Zhou Mi, who was too drunk to walk, to Su Xi who was rushing towards her. She didn't dislike Zhou Mi's alcoholism, and she didn't suspect that the two of them were alone together at an untimely time. Xi Zao saw more distressed, and felt distressed for her husband. Su Xi didn't ask anything, she just turned her head and said something to Xi Zao Words that couldn't be more ordinary.

"Come in with us."

Su Xi supported the cumbersome Zhou Mi and walked towards the door. It could be seen that she was struggling a bit, Xi Zao gritted her teeth, stood where she was, and never took a step forward. Yes, she didn't want to step forward to help.

"No, it's getting late, I should go back."

"Then, be careful on the road and contact you tomorrow."

When she said this, Su Xi didn't look back, Xi Zao only got a back view, a farewell, the same as usual, peaceful and kind, Su Xi thought that tomorrow would be another day when the sun would rise as usual. Nothing changed, business as usual.

Xizao didn't have nails, but why did she still feel that the edge of the nails in her clenched fists had crushed her palm, the pain of cutting, unable to suppress the desolate anger in her heart, Xizao felt that she could no longer restrain it .

"Su Xi, don't you think we should have a good talk?"

She yelled coldly at the distant figure, she was very curious about the look of that person when he turned around, and she wanted to see it very much.

Want to see, she did see it, but what if she saw it, could she get pleasure and satisfaction from that frightened face?

In the end, it was not self-abuse, but the one who hurt himself.

Su Xi's actions, Su Xi's expression, once again hurt Xi Zao's bleeding heart. For the first time, Su Xi subconsciously chose not to look at Xi Zao, but the unconscious person beside her. Zhou Mi, it's a pity that Zhou Mi didn't have the ability to detect Su Xi's panic at this moment.

Su Xi finally turned her head, surprised and urgent, but she kept her voice so low that she was begging.

"Tomorrow, how is tomorrow, Xizao, what's the matter, let's talk about it tomorrow, okay!?"

"it is good."

It seemed that she was in a difficult situation, Xizao let go of her clenched fist with a wry smile, turned and left in a hurry.

Tomorrow, is it tomorrow? Well, she can wait.

However, the honesty that Xi Zao believed in did not come as expected. Su Xi delayed the time again and again, not today, not tomorrow, the day after tomorrow?The day after tomorrow didn't know if he was busy or not, until later, Xi Zao couldn't help but yell at the vague words on the phone.

She said, if you don't want to talk, then we don't need to see each other again!

Su Xi finally panicked, because Xizao had never spoken to her like this before, Xizao never yelled at others, even if there was a conflict between the two of them, Xizao would not directly argue with others, because she just met Xizao At the time, she said that she had never blushed with anyone because she didn't like to quarrel. Su Xi asked Xizao again if she hadn't been angry about certain things. Xizao said that there are many things to bear It's over.

Yes, the Zizao she knows is always humble and docile, doesn't know how to refuse, and likes to let things go.

But this time, it's different.

Xizao's toughness, resentment, and determination, it was the first time that she really became targeted and specific because of a certain person, and she gave an ultimatum.

Only now did Su Xi realize the seriousness of the situation. She always thought that the problem could be delayed, because every time Xi Zao would acquiesce, because even if they were in a cold war, they had conflicts, as long as Su Xi made a phone call, everything would be restored As it turned out, Xizao's demands would only become less and less, so much so that she thought that the problem of immigrating to the United States in the future could be solved, as long as she could find a way, a way to satisfy both sides.

But she is still looking for it, why Xizao is in such a hurry and insists on a reasonable explanation.

And what could she explain!

On August 8th, Su Xi finally agreed to Xizao. The two of them had to face the reality and explain. Su Xi still couldn't find the answer. Maybe she could give it.

It was not the weekend, so Su Xi chose to come out to meet Xizao at night. She had a reason for doing so. If she couldn't give Xizao the answer she wanted, or she couldn't answer at all, she could have an excuse to escape, There is Tongtong at home and millet, so she must go home.

On Wednesday, near nine o'clock in the evening, the customers in the coffee shop were in twos and threes, not too many, mostly talking in low voices, and no one would notice the two quiet women in a hidden corner behind the lush potted plants.In a dark corner, two people were sitting, separated by a [-] cm high platform, so quiet that they could hear each other's heartbeat. They had been sitting like this for more than an hour, and it was time for the deadly silence to come to an end. Being silent like this, and continuing to sit like this, someone should break this silence, someone must break it, but it won't be Su Xi.

"Su Xi."

After an unknown amount of time, the person on the opposite side who lowered his head and held the white cup called her name.

"Ok?"

Su Xi's heart stopped for a beat. She suddenly became a little nervous and forgot to breathe for a moment.

"How much longer can we go down?"

Xizao raised her head. She seemed to be talking to herself, but it also seemed like a question, because even if she raised her head, Su Xi still couldn't find the focal length in her eyes, it was so empty that it seemed to have disappeared. soul.

"As long as you don't change, we'll keep going."

Su Xi was telling the truth, and this was her answer, but she didn't know if such an answer was what Xi Zao wanted.

"Really, then, have you changed?"

Xizao smiled, and Su Xi finally saw her shadow appearing in those eyes, her clenched heart relaxed for some reason.

"For you, I haven't changed."

Su Xi replied that she had never changed. In the past, now, and even in the future, her feelings for Xizao remained the same as before, the most beautiful. It's just that the once hazy emotions became clear, but some things have always remained There, neither increase nor decrease.

"Yeah, you have never changed, I have changed."

Xizao's self-mockery made Su Xi unable to answer, she really wanted to say Xizao, you are not wrong, as long as you are still you, the original you, we are still us, but whose fault is it that led to the current situation Woolen cloth?

"Why did you hide from me about going to the United States?"

Xizao still asked after all.

"I don't necessarily have to go, maybe I will stay, stay with you, you know I can't bear you either!"

Su Xi anxiously defended herself, but why did the more she explained, the more guilty she felt.

"Really! Are you really willing to stay here? What about Zhou Mi?"

Reluctant, maybe Su Xi is even more reluctant to bear Zhou Mi, why is Su Xi so flustered, as if she has done something wrong to Xi Zao, it is because Su Xi already has a choice in her heart, right, but she has been unwilling to admit it.

"Even... Even if I go there, it's not like I won't come back, I can still come back to see you, we can still be the same as before..."

"It's different!"

Xizao's sarcasm interrupted Su Xi's words, and the sneer on her face hurt Su Xi's heart.

"I still love you, you also love me, why is it different!"

"Your love is really selfish, have you ever thought about my feelings, maybe you only think about yourself from the beginning to the end!"

Love is fraternity, right? Su Xi's heart can be distributed to many people, but the love Su Xi gave her will never be complete. Xizao can only get one-third of it, maybe less, because the most important thing is to get the most. The heavy part is always reserved for men. It was like this in the past, and it is still like this now. Nothing has changed.

"I'm selfish!" Su Xi retorted confidently, "I'm selfish, I can ignore Mi and go to you every three days! I'm selfish, I can accept Mi's obsession with you! I'm selfish, I can tolerate Mi being nice to you, treating you Pay attention to everything, do you know that he has never treated me like this before!"

"Oh! I'm selfish, you are generous, I can't sympathize with your good intentions, is it your grievance!"

"Aren't the three of us fine now? I don't care if Zhou Mi likes you, why can't you!"

"You don't care, I care!"

"Only in this way can we be together, we can meet often, the three of us are as good as before, isn't it!"

Xizao didn't want to listen anymore, she just wanted to ask one thing clearly, only Su Xi could agree, she could bet everything she had.

"Do you want to go with me? If you want, we can be together forever. I can give up my life here and take you to another place. If Zhou Mi can give you, so can I!"

Su Xi looked at Xizao in surprise, she was silent for a long time.

"I...you know Tongtong is still young, when she grows up..."

"In the end...you still can't do without Zhou Mi, what about me, how long will I have to wait for you, is it a lifetime?"

Her heart seemed to be drenched with cold water, she still didn't want to go with her, or she was too naive, Xizao lowered her head, looked at the brown liquid in the cup that had already cooled down, and asked herself with a wry smile.

"Isn't it good now! Nothing has changed, we know that we both have each other in our hearts, love each other, miss each other, that's enough!"

Why? Isn't it great?Zizao's wish is too idealistic, how can there be so many perfections in the world, isn't it good to be content?

"But I can't have you, yes!" Xizao laughed at himself, tears streaming down his face, "Yes, I was expecting too much, Su Xi, I made things difficult for you, I can't do anything, and I can't Do, so I can only wait forever with fantasy? But, have you ever thought that if one day I like someone else, if one day I can't wait anymore, I won't wait any longer. "

"No, you won't do this!"

Su Xi directly denied Xizao's hypothesis without even thinking about it.

"why?"

No, it's a ridiculous word, Xizao doesn't know where Su Xi's confidence comes from.

"You can't hold others in your heart anymore, otherwise you wouldn't have chosen to be alone in the past eight years."

"I can't live without you, you've made up your mind, haven't you?"

"Ah."

Take a deep breath, and then take a deep breath, the stagnant atmosphere surrounding the two people suddenly dissipated, Xizao's stiff expression softened, and the corners of her downward-curved mouth slightly raised, she became calm, just like the sad conversation just now Never happened the same, but she looked down again, she said with a smile.

"People's minds change. I have never been unable to guess your heart. How can you be sure that my heart will never change? Perhaps, one day, I will really let go."