Summertime

Su Xi, Xi Zao didn't know if she was vomiting with him.

During the phone call on Monday, when Su Xi told Xizao sorry that she had to change the itinerary that Xizao had agreed with her, Xizao was unusually calm, she just said coldly, I got it.

I'm sorry, Su Xi was a little silent, she said, don't do this, I know, knowing that I will make you unhappy, but you are like this, I don't know what to do now.

What do you want me to do, make a scene, beg you not to go with Zhou Mi?

Xizao took a deep breath, trying to calm down the disappointment and resentment that aroused, she didn't want to be like a resentful mistress, yelling at the phone, accusing, crying, indeed, she was playing the role of those worldly wraiths. The little character that everyone despises, she can play all the plots as she does in books, TV dramas, and movies, because this is her role.

It's a pity that she can't do it, but, so what if she can do it, will Su Xi really abandon Zhou Mi, her family, everything, and choose herself?

Isn't this what you choose voluntarily?Why can't you stay in your own position, why do you have to overstep, why do you have to get more and more?Knowing that if you do this, you will only lose more and more.

I'm going to get on the plane, you and Zhou Mi will be fine.

Su Xi still wanted to explain something, but Xi Zao suddenly didn't want to listen, and cut off the call hastily.

On the night of arriving in Hong Kong, Su Xi called Xizao three or five times. Xizao let the phone vibrate, light up, and flicker in her hand, but she didn't answer it.In the middle of the night, Su Xi sent another long text on WeChat, she was explaining that she didn't do it on purpose, everything was out of necessity, the plane ticket was booked without telling her, and she finally asked for leave, Said that he wanted to spend more time with his children and himself. The last quarrel, Mi has been brooding. He said that this time he wants to make up for himself.

Therefore, Su Xi cannot fail him, and she has no reason to fail him.

Su Xi said, next time, we have many next times, she will definitely not miss the appointment next time.

Snapped--

The warm drops of water hit the screen drop by drop, blurring the text. Xizao raised her head and took a deep breath, widening her red eyes, trying to let the tears flow back. This time, she still didn't reply, she thought Her indifference would be a successful revenge, but that night, she suffered from insomnia.

In the next few days, Su Xi seemed to disappear. Xizao couldn't receive a single message from her. After a phone call, even her circle of friends seemed to have premeditated and stopped updating. Su Xi would not be like this before Yes, Xizao knew that Su Xi was angry, but couldn't she be a little bit more tempered, she also had emotions.Xizao refuses to compromise, isn't it just a cold war, she is best at this, so she should disappear too, without a trace.

Xizao made up her mind not to think about those messy things these days. She was busy and working hard at the exhibition. After the exhibition, she accompanied Moyou, eating, shopping, and wandering in the narrow streets and alleys of Hong Kong.

Xizao remembers that one day, two people took the Star Ferry to the Central Ferry Pier. They took the escalator up the mountain from Central, stopped and stopped until they reached the end of the escalator, and came to the Mid-Levels. What to do next, after a brief tangled meal, the two decided to go all the way along the secluded tree-lined path of Gandao, and go down the mountain to find the cable car to Taiping Mountain.

That day, Xizao stayed in the Lingxiao Pavilion for a long time, but she didn't think about anything, her mind was in chaos, she wanted to let herself go in an empty space, like a bird soaring high in the sky.

At dusk, Xizao lay on the glass fence and had a bird's-eye view of the golden cityscape on both sides of Victoria Harbor in the setting sun, quietly waiting for the moment when the whole splendid city changes instantly under the night when day and night alternate.

As the night falls, the lanterns come on, and the sea of ​​lights below the mountain floats.The scenery on the high place changes from clear to blurred until it completely melts into the darkness. The cool wind blows and blows the loose white shirt of jujube, and the flying hair is also scattered. The prosperity of the city at the bottom of the mountain is gone. , the light and heat are boiling, looking here from a distance, you are not in it, you can't hear the hustle and bustle there, you can't see the busy traffic there, you can't smell the material desire and restlessness there, you just get an illusion, a rough The silhouette is like a mirage in the hinterland of the desert. After people sigh, there is only endless emptiness and sadness.

Xizao's heart began to feel empty again, and this feeling lasted for many years. At the age of 19, during that summer vacation, when Xizao returned to the south from the university in the north, she found that the home in her heart seemed to be gone. Her father and mother rented out the house they had lived in for more than ten years and moved into a bigger house. All traces of the old home disappeared, and the memories of elementary school, junior high school, and high school were packed away along with the discarded furniture, books, sundries, large and small, in a few dilapidated tricycles. Didn't call it home. At the age of 19, it became the first watershed in Xizao's life. The story of Xizao before the age of 19 can no longer be found. Now whenever my mother talks about her childhood experience, Xizao I can only smile and say, she doesn’t remember, she really doesn’t remember, those things are too strange even if traces of them can be found in her mind, and also, after she was 19 years old, she gradually lost her memory. The memory before the age of 19 has been incomplete until now, and there is nothing left. Sometimes, she even doubts the authenticity of her mother's narratives, as if those stories are not her own at all, and she is just a bystander , Listening to other people writing chapters in the novel with their own names, vividly.

At the age of 19, she did not know when her heart began to get sick. It seemed that her solid heart was hollowed out, something was missing, and it became hollow, so light that she couldn’t see the weight, which made her flustered and disturbed. Let her float like duckweed and weeds, she can't find a home, this is what she lacks.She also knows that for so many years, all she has done, all her efforts, are to find back what she lost when she was 19 years old, but she has traveled through countless cities, met countless people, and arrived at Now her heart is still empty, she is still a rootless person.

The prosperous and prosperous age at the foot of the mountain is exquisitely crafted and beautiful, but it is flashy. It cannot fill the lack in the heart, and the blank will continue.

I don't know if it's because of touching the scene, the feeling of emptiness and emptiness in Xizao's heart is infinitely magnified, turning into a boundless black hole and swallowing her in one bite.The atmosphere of desolation, sorrow, and confusion diffuses from the little people in the prosperous world, and then blends into the atmosphere of the surrounding secular people in the next moment. No one perceives it, let alone cares about it.

In fact, between her and Su Xi, Xi Zao didn't know what she was doing, what she would get, let alone whether she would continue. Looking for the way home, she wanted to find what she had lost in Su Xi.In the past, when she was with Mo You, she also did this, but unfortunately it was fruitless in the end.This time, she didn't know why she was so persistent, no matter how slim her hope was, even if her clenched fist was not as tight and powerful as before, she still didn't let go, maybe she still wanted to bet Give it a go.

There is not much left, and it is useless to keep it. It is all squandered, and there is no suspense. Can it be exchanged for peace of mind?

"Are you ok?"

The hair fluttering in the wind was smoothed by a pair of gentle hands and placed behind her ears. Moyou held her cold hands leaning on the railing and asked in a low voice.

"Well, it's fine."

Zizao turned around and leaned against the soft body of the person beside her. The warmth of the hug might relieve her heart disease. She didn't speak, closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and quietly enjoyed the warmth and peace of mind at this moment, but she couldn't Greedy, after a while, Xizao then resumed her usual smile, she left Moyou's embrace, took Moyou's hand, and was about to leave.

"Let's go eat!" she said with a smile.

That night, Moyou still asked about Su Xi. In fact, Xizao has been very calm these days, working, playing, and resting. She hardly showed any abnormalities in all the states, but that night, she finally hid Unable to control her inner emotions, after venting, the remaining sensibility is strong and depressed, she has nowhere to put it, can't pick it up, can't get out, and can only cry.

In the deep night, the crack in a woman's heart was cut by sorrow, and another woman used her body to help her repair it.

She kept every word of Moyou's words in her heart, and it's not like she didn't think about it. She understands the truth, but so what, there are so many people who understand the truth in this world, but many people still have a hard time living this life.

On June 29th, Friday, the last day of the exhibition, there were still many visitors. Xizao told Moyou that CouCi's work had won an award in this design exhibition.

Mo You said that she would definitely come to the awards ceremony in the afternoon of the exhibition.

In the afternoon, at three o'clock, Moyou came from behind the scenes holding a bouquet of fragrant lilies in her hand. She smiled and stretched out her hand to smooth the small folds on the neckline of the Zizao shirt. She said, congratulations.

Xizao took the bouquet, she lowered her head and sniffed lightly, the tip of her nose was wetted by the fragrant dew on the tender white petals, she tilted her head, opened her arms and hugged Moyou into her arms forcefully, thanking her softly.

"Thank you, thank you for everything you have done for me."

Afterwards, on the awarding platform covered by the red carpet, Xizao took over the glass trophy from the organizer. It was so heavy that she had to hold it tightly with both hands, and then smiled as she faced the dazzling light of flashing lights below the stage. .However, at the next moment, she suddenly froze.

At that moment, all kinds of sounds around, the clapping of hands, the sound of camera shutter, the sound of boiling people, the sound of high-heeled shoes and leather shoes stepping on the ground, and the sound of the seat moving, seemed to be from another space, and she was completely integrated into it. She didn't enter that unit, and amidst the indistinct noise, she could clearly hear her heartbeat, the frequency was irregular and a little fast.

Under the stage, among the crowd, Xizao saw a person with bright eyes crescent moon and a smile like a flower, she was looking at herself.