In my days as a farmer

Xia Dongli really wanted to argue for human beings, but if someone studied it in front of him... Uh, well, it would be quite scary.

Speaking of this, Xia Dongli suddenly remembered that something similar had happened to him.

When he was still in elementary school, the medical and sanitary conditions in Huaguo were not very good at that time, and there was a human parasite called roundworm that was more likely to endanger the health of children.

Although the school distributes deworming medicine and has been promoting the habit of washing hands before and after meals, but in order to prevent some children from becoming resistant to the medicine, or being infected with parasites due to bad habits after successful deworming, the school Stool tests are done every year.

The specific measure is to distribute a plastic box to each student and ask the students to write their names on the plastic box and hand it over to the class teacher the next day.

At that time, mobile phones were not yet popular. It is not like the teacher directly notifies the parents of any notifications now. Back then, it was the children who went back and said it themselves.

This is actually a very normal inspection. The excrement of the human body contains a lot of important information, which is a basis for judging whether the body is healthy or not... But it is not the case for the students!

Elementary school and junior high school are the period when children's individual consciousness is rapidly awakened, plus there are factors such as the initial awakening of gender awareness between men and women and resistance awareness, cough cough, in short, it is the collective decision of the children in Xia Dongli's class- —It is impossible to hand over the poo, and it is impossible to hand over in this life.

Of course, it is impossible to tell the parents!

So the children showed their own special skills, some put stones, some put rubber, and their witty head teacher could find something wrong by shaking the box.

Whose poop can roll freely in the box, and the color seen through the box is not right.

So the children thought hard, and they came up with another solution—one person discovered that the mashed and mashed Mai Lisu looked very much like poop in a box, so the Mai Lisu in the canteen was instantly arrested. After sweeping the air, the boxes that everyone handed in the next day were full of such weird substances.

The children are very proud. They feel that there is absolutely no problem after handing in this thing. No matter the shape or color, there is no flaw. As long as you don't open it and look at it, you will never be able to tell it apart.

How can the teacher open it and see it!The teacher is also afraid of getting dirty.

But the Tao is one foot tall and the devil is ten feet tall... Their teacher really knows how to read!

Xia Dongli will never forget the fear of being called up one by one to open the poop box for the teacher to check that day, let alone the shame of the whole class being punished to clean the toilet in the building.Huh, this is also Xia Dongli's first time entering the women's toilet, and his teacher took a picture of it, and sent the picture to the parents.

Recalling the moment of social death, Xia Dongli couldn't help but twitched the corners of his mouth. He looked at the crying Panda Jing, and his eyes gradually showed some empathy.

But sympathy belongs to sympathy, and the key issue is still not to be forgotten: "Now that the big troops have gone into the mountains to look for pandas, they may have to put probes, so you must not become a panda again. If there is any need, well, bear with it and come back." .”

If traces of pandas are really captured, I don't know what will happen.

Pandas are given special treatment in China, as long as pandas are involved, the green light can be given everywhere.Northeast China is definitely not a place where normal pandas can live. If it is known that there are pandas here, the relevant departments will probably send a scientific research team into the mountains. If it is more serious, there may be a documentary production or something.

At that time, if the news is not hidden, ordinary people will go up the mountain to try to find pandas. The road on his side is the most convenient. If there are more people, the first one affected will be Xiaotupo. When people come and go, it is inevitable that some people will move their minds.

What's more, the clues of Xiaoyu's body may be destroyed by these people, so these things can still be avoided.

As for whether the scientific research team who couldn't find the panda would become suspicious or something, Xia Dongli was not very worried.

In the Northeast, it will be winter in a few months. When the time comes, the mountains will be covered by heavy snow, and it will be difficult to walk on flat ground, let alone mountaineering. Research activities will definitely not be possible.

In the Northeast where there is a long winter, the deep mountains are the hunting grounds for ferocious beasts. It will not be surprising if the scientific research team enters the mountains in spring and fails to find them.

This is also the reason why the research team moved so fast this time. If the pandas are not found before the snow falls, it will be too late once the snow falls!

The little young man nodded lazily, and the friends around him patted him a few times to comfort him, and it was obvious that he was usually very popular.

Xia Dongli held back, but couldn't hold back, he rummaged through his snack store, and then handed over a few small bags of snacks.

"What is this?" Panda Jing blinked his wet round eyes, and stretched out his hand suspiciously to take the small plastic bag handed over by Xia Dongli. When he got the thing, it seemed to be an instinctive reaction. His little nose was still there. Moved a few times.

"Shredded bamboo shoots and peanuts, you can try it if you get hungry on the road. This one won't get angry." Xia Dongli's eyes couldn't help looking at the young man's hand. His fingers were small and short, round and fleshy, a bit like Children's hands.

At this moment, in Xia Dongli's eyes, the claw that was catching him to feed seemed to transform into a black, furry panda claw with pink pads.

Ah this...

"Mr. Xia?" A nasal murmur sounded aggrieved, "You, can you let go?"

Xia Dongli suddenly came back to his senses, and found that he was holding on to the snack bag, and the young man in front of him was about to cry.

Ah, sin, sin, even in human form, the panda is so cute with an aggrieved expression!

He quickly let go of his hand, silently apologizing for the bad thoughts that flashed in his mind.

You can't rub your head, pinch your ears, let alone touch your tail. The one in front of you is a fine panda, not an ordinary panda.Doing the same action is called X harassment. He has a boyfriend, so he must avoid suspicion...Damn it, his hands are so itchy.

Xia Dongli stretched out his hand to pick up the rice from the ground and stuffed it into his arms, pinched his ears and rubbed his tail, then touched his hair all the way from his head to his buttocks, until he rolled the rice down to lie flat on the ground, only then did he feel the itchiness in his palms dissipate some.

At this time, the large troops from both sides were also preparing to go up the mountain, and Xia Dongli also planned to visit the cherry grove, so he was about to go out with the small three-wheel key.As soon as he walked to the door, he heard a few dragon youths who were waiting for someone whispering: "The pandas are so shallow, they are so far away, and they don't even look at our dragons. They are not coveted by the human race from head to toe." After all, we have been courted for tens of millions of years and have been drawn into blood ties. Have you ever said anything? Now it’s just being pursued by a few white coats from the human race, and I really don’t know anything about it.”

"Brother, why bother with him, after all, the beast race, it is inevitable that the hair is long and the knowledge is short, haha."

Suddenly hearing the words of the Shui Clan DISS Beast Clan, Xia Dongli's hand to push the door stopped, he took a step back, and then fell into thinking.

Do humans have YY dragons?Wait, if you think about it carefully, it seems that there is indeed, but Xia Dongli feels that this is not the fault of human beings, but that the dragon is really too real!use!up!

Saliva is a precious spice, blood is a famous raw material, blowing breath can promote the growth of fruits, beards can also endorse fans and candies, not to mention beautiful appearance, representatives of many children and dragon knights.

Wait, if you put it this way, it doesn't mean that the dragon is the body of a snake... If Xiao Yao is really a dragon, isn't he...

Ahhh! ! !No, I can't think about it!Xia Dongli quickly patted his face, then opened the door with a serious face and walked out. He very calmly greeted several expressionless and extremely cold dragon youths, and mobilized Xiaosan as if nothing had happened. Wheel, as if completely unaware that these people were still gathering to complain a moment ago.

The days passed so peacefully, Xia Dongli was a little apprehensive at first, but then calmed down.

The two vans went back and forth several times, and visited several households near Baiyun Mountain. In the end, I don’t know whether they gave up or put away the sampling equipment, and they didn’t show up for several days.

On the contrary, Lao Li's enthusiasm remained undiminished, and he did not express any disappointment at not finding any more information about pandas. Instead, he was very excited because he finally touched the habitat of the lynx family. how come back.

Occasionally, the two came back with exhausted faces. At most, they asked Xia Dongli to borrow a bathroom to take a bath, and before the two parties had time to say a few words, the two threw themselves into the tent and snorted.

"It looks so hard." Xia Dongli sent someone a piece of braised beef noodles, and sighed through the glass window as they watched them Xilihulu finish eating and then ran to clean the pot.

But when he turned his head to look at his current appearance, he felt a little sluggish.

He's not much better either, classical Chinese is really difficult! ! !

Although for a Chinese person, basically everyone has some reserves of classical Chinese and related common sense, and the Chinese culture has never stopped flowing, and the overall sentence structure has not changed much, but this does not mean that a modern person can take it casually. You can read and understand a book of ancient Chinese.

In fact, Xia Dongli was somewhat shocked. He originally thought that his literary background was not bad, but it turned out that the difficulty of reading this kind of professional philosophical books was not comparable to that of narrative novels with plots.

The latter can even guess, while the former is like a book from heaven.

Even Xia's father couldn't help him with this, so in the end Xia Dongli could only think of a way - he went to the author group to find help!

There are hidden dragons and crouching tigers in the writers' association group, and there are all kinds of occupations. When Xia Dongli said that he was looking for a classical Chinese translator for a fee, it only took half a day before someone beat him.

The person who knocked him, Xia Dongli, knew him. He was also a contracted author at a certain point. He belonged to a Buddhist author with good literature and was known as a "holy monk".

Ahem, don't get me wrong, he himself has always resisted this title, but the reason why he has this nickname is entirely because-his protagonists are all monks.

That's right, in this era when the Internet society generally praises Taoism and suppresses Buddhism, the protagonists of this author are all monks.

His first work also caused a bloody storm at the time. The original setting was that a monk who descended from the mountain traveled to another world to punish rape and eliminate evil, and promote Buddhism by the way.

In that era when there were no river crabs, it didn’t matter if the main character was a monk. On the contrary, it was vaguely interesting. Readers all said that this setting is very novel, and the transformation of a holy monk is also very possible. I’m looking forward to it. As a result, almost a hundred chapters were written, and the protagonist in his novel never had an affair.

That's fine, it's fine if you don't engage in girls and start a career, everyone takes a step back and waits to see the protagonist discovers that learning Buddhism can't save the world's common people after experiencing the dangers in the world, so it's okay to tear the cassock angrily and turn into an angry Buddha to beat the opponent violently. As a result, this The protagonist has resorted to mouth skills.

He talked all the way, all kinds of Buddhist allusions and Buddhist verses, enlightening the enemy all the way, and at the end of the day, the monk became a generation of eminent monks, opened up the Buddhist belief in a different world, and even became a Buddha after his death.

Readers will become Buddhas immediately after reading it! !

The second article was even more exaggerated. It was about an ordinary young man who was born with Buddha-nature and wanted to become a monk. However, the family passed down the family for several generations. Although there was no throne to inherit, the whole family hoped that he would get married and have children soon, so Arrange various stories of chance encounters with beauties.

Readers who were fooled by the first novel felt cute when they saw this setting, and hoped that the author could correct the evil, so they came in holding their noses.

As a result, I never expected that the ending of this article is that the young man really persuaded his parents, grandparents and relatives to successfully become a monk, and then became a master of the generation. What's more, he also brought a girl who has always been ambiguous to become a monk! !

Isn't this cheating? !

It is said that when the holy monk typed the end, a reader declared on the spot that he wanted to talk to him face-to-face, because the matter was a big deal, and he successfully got out of the circle!

Excluding the final ending is a little tricky, in fact, this big guy’s article is really well written, and there is no shortage of plot fluctuations, laughter, abuse, and ignition points, otherwise, readers can’t be fooled to the final ending, and even the various details in it The phrases and cultural connotations of Buddhist verses have also been praised by relevant people.

The author is also quite kind and enthusiastic in the group. Xia Dongli also received his help when he first joined the group, so the two parties are still WeChat friends.

Now that the other party said that he could try to translate for him, Xia Dongli naturally believed it.

He immediately negotiated the translation fee with the other party, and directly transferred the money through WeChat as a deposit, and then sent part of the original text.Of course, he copied it by hand, and it counted as a trial translation. If he was satisfied with the content translated by the other party, he would pass on the text.

That night, in a small monastery in the capital, a young monk hurriedly rushed to the monk's room where he was attending evening class holding a few A4 papers: "Master, brother, he has enlightened!"

"What are you panicking about?" The old monk who was beating the wooden fish with scriptures in his hand raised the corners of his mouth, but then he forcibly suppressed the corners of his mouth, and said calmly, "This is the opportunity to change, you can practice hard in the future... ..."

"But, but—" the young monk handed the A4 paper to the old monk, crying, "Brother suddenly realized it after reading these! He said he was going to translate it for others. This is not a Buddhist book!"

After the old monk took over the A4 paper, he only read two lines of words, and his face changed. Amitabha, it is actually a detailed explanation of the Tao Te Ching, and it is obviously written by a person who has attained the Tao. The accumulation of thought change itself is full, and suddenly I saw this great power. The book will inevitably be influenced by others.

Although it is not yet possible to change from the Buddha, but it is inevitable to owe a favor.

He gritted his teeth and said to the little monk, "You go and get Master's cell phone."

"Master, can this phone wake up senior brother?" The little monk held the phone with both hands and looked puzzled.

"No!" The old monk calmly pressed the button on his phone, "My teacher is to complain about unfair competition!"