Ximenqing loves Wusong [Water Margin]

There are eight dishes for a table, including meat and vegetables and good wine.

As soon as Song Taigong saw the delicious food on the table, he clapped his hands and shouted: "There are so many delicious food, Wu Er, you are so kind, I know you are the most kind."

As soon as he finished speaking, he grabbed a chicken leg and stuffed it into his mouth. He choked and rolled his eyes. Then he quickly took a good wine and poured it down. Juice and wine.

I whispered to Erlang: "Erlang, Liangshan's life will not be so bad, right? Why is the leader's own father like a hungry wolf?"

Erlang held his cup to cover his face: "It is said that the grandpa was not like this before. When Brother Song got into a lawsuit, he went out and hid. The grandpa got seriously ill because he missed him. After he recovered, his brain was not working well. I can’t remember that I’ve eaten, and I’m hungry when I open my eyes.”

Looking at Song Taigong's voracious eating, I shook my head and clicked my mouth.

After all, Huarong is a smart person. After being beaten up by me, he just discussed martial arts and gossip with Wu Er at the dinner table, and didn't mention a word about that person wanting to accept Zhuangzi.

And I also resumed the idle state of gagging with him in the past, as if there was no dispute at all.

After eating, Erlang took Huarong to ask about the leader of the army.

Huarong was born in the general family, so asking him these questions is a good idea. After a few questions, our family Erlang admired him so much that he insisted on dragging him to live in the military camp, saying that he still had a lot of official duties. Ask him on the spot.

Huarong looked at me with a strange look and smiled: "Tonight, my brother and I will sleep in the same room, the high official won't be jealous, will he?"

I also looked at him strangely: "Yo, why don't you stay here and we two brothers will sleep in the same room?"

Erlang scolded me: "Qing'er is not allowed to mess around. Brother Hua Rong, where are you thinking? Our family's Qing'er is not that small, so we should leave now."

Watching the two of them walk out the door side by side, talking and laughing, a big fat head suddenly appeared from behind: "Ximen Qing, how about we two brothers sleep in the same room tonight?"

I shivered in fright: "I said, old man, is it possible to speak after swallowing that big handful of vermicelli in your mouth? The soup was thrown on me."

Song Taigong slurped, swallowed the mouthful of vermicelli, and smacked his mouth in satisfaction: "Ximenqing, why is your family so rich? How do you have so many delicious foods? You and How did Wu Er have such a good life?"

I sat aside and picked my teeth with my legs crossed.

"Because my father is rich.

I am rich because my father is rich.

Because my father is rich and I am rich, our family has so many delicious foods.

Because my father is rich and I am rich, our family has so many delicious foods, and Wu Er and I have such a good life. "

Song Taigong drank the pork rib soup and said: "Then why don't I come over and spend time with you two?"

"You have a son yourself, why come with us? Go with your own son."

"I don't like my son, I just like Wu Er, and I like you too, or you two can be my sons."

"Hey, old man, I don't want you to take me with you. We have enough food and drink for you, and you still take advantage of us? You can eat quickly, I'm still waiting to wash the dishes."

Song Taigong stuck his head into the soup bowl and drank it with a gurgling sound, just like drinking a donkey.

I shook my head and sighed: If the son is so good, the father will suffer from Alzheimer's disease. Is this considered retribution?

For the rest of the time, I hummed with my legs crossed, quietly waiting for the old man to finish eating.

I waited from noon to Wei time, from never time to Shen time, from Shen time to You time, and then from You time to Xu time... The old man finally licked all the plates in front of him clean.

Then he patted his stomach with satisfaction, burped loudly, tapped his mouth, and asked me a famous quote that shocked the world.

"Ximen Qing, should we have dinner?"

I fell off the stool in a somersault, stared at his stomach and asked, "I said, sir, what material is your stomach made of? How can it be so edible?"

He picked his teeth and looked at me: "Can I eat? Am I the same as you, just ate one meal?"

I looked at the piles of empty bowls and plates piled up on the table and nodded: "It's one meal, and you have eaten this meal for four hours. One lamb chop, one big elbow, one half-roasted chicken One goose, four servings of cold dishes, two pieces of shortbread... I said old man, no wonder your son asked Huarong to bring you down from Mount Liang, he was afraid that you would eat the mountain down by yourself, right?"

Song Taigong leaned on the back of the chair, squinted his eyes and patted his stomach in satisfaction, then suddenly opened his eyes and asked, "Do you have any good tea here? I'm a little tired of eating just now, I want to drink some tea."

admire!

There is really no other word besides these two words.

I called the servant to come in and make tea for this ancestor, and after cleaning up the table and the kitchen, I washed up and went to bed.

Erlang was not at home at night, so I was a little empty around me. I hugged his pajamas and lay down under the quilt, and fell asleep after a while.

In the middle of the night, I suddenly heard a rustling under the bed. At first I thought it was a mouse and didn't pay attention.

But after a while, the commotion became louder and louder, and I heard a few laughs of "hang, hang, hang".

I was so scared that I sat up all of a sudden, and quickly lit the lamp.

I saw the fat old man sitting on the ground with bare feet, happily counting the bank notes.

I was so angry that I jumped on the ground and snatched the silver ticket: "I said, old man, are you okay? You don't sleep in the middle of the night, and you come to my room to be a thief?"

Song Taigong pulled his face unhappily: "Ximenqing, what are you talking about? Why am I becoming a thief? Don't I just want to spend some of your money?"

I tilted my face at 42 degrees to look at him: "How can you be so confident when you spend some of my money? Did Liang Jingru give you the courage?"

The old fat man turned his mouth away: "Ximen Qing, you are so rich, so what if you give me some?"

I packed the money tightly in my pocket, pointed to the door and said, "Old man, I think you are getting old and a little confused, I don't care about what happened tonight, you should go back to your room and sleep now."

The old fat man shook his head: "I don't sleep, I can't sleep, I remember you have money but I don't, I just feel so uncomfortable that I can't sleep."

"It's none of my business if you can't sleep with him? I have to sleep myself, okay?"

The old fat man looked at me with a serious expression on his face: "Young man, don't take money so seriously, money is not everything."

I said, "I didn't point out that money is omnipotent, as long as it can be spent."

"Ximen Qing, money can't make you happy..."

"You think too much, even if the money can't make me happy, I don't intend to make you happy with it, take it back, and dare to come and grab it? Can you beat me?"

"Ximen Qing, the power of money is not infinite."

"Nonsense, if you have money, you will not be poor. You are poor because you have no money."

"It's not a big deal to steal some money from you? Why are you so persistent?"

"You are wrong, all things about money are big things, because the things of the rich are called things, and the things of the poor are called poor.

I said, old man, you are not finished yet, are you?I will never give you this banknote, so you should give up on it! "

The old fat man turned his face fiercely: "Ximen Qing, don't be shameless."

I rolled up my sleeves, went up and grabbed his collar: "Hey, what's the matter? You're a thief and you dare to curse, do you really think I dare not hit you?"

The old fat man was so frightened that the fat on his face trembled: "Ximenqing, do you dare to fight with me? Believe it or not, I will tell Second Master Wu about this."

I grinned grimly: "Hey, you think I'm afraid you'll tell me? Wu Er is my man, who do you think he'll turn towards?"

The old fat man finally relented: "Ximenqing, if you have something to say, don't do it. I'm the one who is shameless and stole your money. Is it okay if I admit my mistake to you?"

I touched his forehead: "I said, old man, are you pretending to be stupid? How do I think you are smarter than a monkey?"

He nodded again and again: "Yes, yes, I am smarter than a monkey. I always say that, but they still don't believe it."

Yep, still a fool.

I grabbed him and threw him out the door, locked the door behind my back, and went to bed and fell asleep.

What the hell is going on every day?

Can people on Liangshan have a normal one?Either it's a vagina, or it's a lunatic, and now there's a fool, it's really unstoppable.

After tossing all night, I didn't sleep well. I got up the next morning, cleaned up and went out to have a look. I saw the quilt on the bed in another room, and the old fat man's luggage was gone.

It is estimated that he told me to clean up last night and felt embarrassed, so he left by himself.

Let's go, let's go.

I yawned and went to the kitchen to get some food. I just lit the fire when I felt something was wrong behind me.

Open the door of the cabinet next to it and look, good guy, that old fat man is nesting in it.

With a chicken leg in his hand, he gnawed on his face happily, and what was even more annoying was that he put all the sausages I made for Erlang yesterday on his body!

This is stealing meat without money!

Seeing that I was going to catch him, the old fat man screamed in fright, threw the chicken leg, jumped out of the cabinet and ran away.

This made me so angry that I ran after him with a rolling pin in my hand.

You can't imagine that a big fat man who is over 55 years old and weighs more than [-] catties, with [-] catties of sausages on his back, [-] catties of salted bacon and two roast geese, can run so fast.

My 1.8-meter-five-foot-long legs chased him until he was snoring and panting, and finally caught up with him. This guy was still holding on to the sausage and yelling loudly: "Come on, come and see!" Ah, your owner Ximen Qing bullied the elderly!"

A passer-by next to us took a look at the two of us, and ran away with a "wow".

The old fat man stared and wailed: "Ah, you people in Ximen Village are so indifferent!"