Ximenqing loves Wusong [Water Margin]

Well, I have adapted to the brain circuit of the people on Liangshan.

"Okay,? Old Li,? Wipe your snot off your face first? To tell you the truth,? I also came to rescue the two of them. People on Liangshan have also got the news,? I'm afraid it's this You've already sneaked into the city for a while,? You must not startle the snake."

Li Kui asked: "Do you have a solution?"

"There is a way,? But there is no guarantee that nothing will go wrong, you come with me first..."

The two of them ducked under the table.

"Look at the murder platform, which is six feet seven inches high and two feet square. There is a sacred case on the platform, and a circle is drawn with cinnabar on the ground?,? During the execution, Brother Dai and Song Dajiang will stay there In this circle, eat food on the road, drink dead wine, and make your last wish.

For the two of us, we bought two coffins and pulled them with four oxen and hid them under this platform.

Taking advantage of the people above worshiping ghosts and gods and drinking big promises, we took the opportunity to saw the board, and when the executioner swung the knife, we just sawed the board.

The two elder brothers just fell into the coffin. I lighted the firecrackers on the back of the cow's buttocks, and led them out. They went straight into the crowd and joined Erlang and the others, and successfully escaped the city! "

Li Kui was stunned when he heard this: "Otherwise, let's start sawing the boards now, and as soon as we go to the execution platform tomorrow, we will teach the two elder brothers to fall off before they drink the promise."

"Stupid, isn't it? If the board is sawed ahead of time, won't people see it? So it can only be now, let's prepare the bullock cart and coffin first, and hide the people here, and then do it later. .”

Li Kui thought for a while with his big black face: "It sounds feasible, so I will do as you said. I will go to prepare saws and buy coffins right now."

"Come on, then I'll go buy an ox cart right now. The soldiers will be divided into two groups, and the work can be done faster."

Li Kui was very reliable this time. After I got rid of the bullock cart, he also prepared the coffin. The two of them hid the bullock cart under the table in the dark, and the two of them lay in the coffin. Alright, let's wait for tomorrow's execution.

After lying down for a while, Li Kui suddenly asked: "Your name is Ximenqing, right? Why is your surname Xili? I have never heard of this surname."

I said, "Aren't you talking nonsense? My surname is not Xi, but Ximen."

He added: "Yi, this surname is also very rare, it doesn't exist in hundreds of surnames, right?"

I said, "Lao Li, can you stop talking? We'll be in trouble if a night watchman finds out."

Li Kui said "oh", and asked after a while: "Then let's just lie upright in the coffin all night? Don't say a word, can't you suffocate people?"

I said: "If you can't bear it, go out first. I'll just watch here alone. This matter is no small matter. If you insist on making a noise, if you recruit the night watchman, the four of us will die together in a blink of an eye." .”

Li Kui thought for a while and said, "Oh, that's not going to work, we're here to save them, we can't die together..."

I said, "Then can you just keep your mouth shut?"

He said, "OK."

I took off my clothes and put them on my body, lay down in the coffin and just closed my eyes when I heard a "boom" and then a series of "puchi puchi".

A pungent smell!

I covered my nose and sat up and shouted in a low voice: "I said Li Kui, are you still going to finish? If you don't let you talk, you fart instead? Are you going to smoke me to death?"

That guy laughed straight: "You don't let me talk, I'm holding my breath to the end, I'll put a few more while there's no one here, and someone will come to watch the night later, I don't even dare to fart Mile."

God knows how I got the lard so confused that I even took this idiot as an ally.

It took a while for the stench to dissipate, and I heard "creaking" in the coffin next to me.

But I was so angry, I sat up and scolded him: "I said Li Kui, can you stop making any noise? What are you doing blindly in the coffin?"

Li Kui was not happy: "What are you doing all the time? You don't ask me to say anything, and I don't ask me to fart. My breath is stuck in my stomach and I move it a few times to let the breath go smoothly." .”

"Are you kidding the bell and vibrating, right? Come on, let it go, let it go, let it go all at once.

But remember, after the third watch, you must hold back, and there must be no more movement!

The cow's mouth was strangled by me, and the cow's buttocks were all covered with plaster, just to keep them from making any noise, but you kept moving. "

Li Kui laughed straight away, farting generously while laughing.

"Bang bang bang, chi chi chi, zi liu zi liu, puff zih, ben'er..."

God is so pitiful, this guy can do so many tricks when he farts, and he played it for almost half an hour, but there was not a single one who made a loud noise!

Add to that the smell, grandma of the heavens, where is this stuff a fart?Thick it up, that's shit!

This smoked me so much that I couldn't even open my eyes. I couldn't take it anymore, so I closed the coffin lid myself.

After a long time, this guy finally finished farting.After a short pause, he knocked on the coffin board outside again: "Ximen Qing, Ximen Qing, do you have anything to eat? Give me some! My stomach is empty, and I'm a little hungry again."

I was so angry that I pushed up the lid of the coffin, took a piece of plaster and stuck it on his mouth: "I want you to talk again!"

This guy's eyes were wide open and he was about to get angry, just when he heard the footsteps of soldiers on night watch outside, the two of them quickly fell silent, not even daring to breathe.

It wasn't until those people had all left that they breathed a sigh of relief.

Li Kui rolled his eyes, turned his butt and wanted to let it go, I pointed at his face and threatened: "If you dare to make any more noise, I will put a plaster on your butt, do you believe it or not?"

Li Kui rolled his eyes and gestured straight: "If I don't make a sound, I just fart."

"It's not good to be boring! It has a smell, and the smell can also attract people!"

The guy rolled his eyes and thought for a while, and finally nodded, finally willing to lie in the coffin and calm down.

I wiped the cold sweat off my forehead, and lay down wrapped in clothes, forcing myself to catch up on sleep.

If the guess is correct, Erlang and the others have already entered the city, and they will disguise themselves and sneak into the crowd early tomorrow morning to find a chance to save people.

According to my plan, I successfully rescued Dai Zong and the others, rushed into the crowd to join Erlang, and escaped from the city as quickly as possible, and we were safe.

The next day, as soon as it was dawn, I heard someone walking above my head. I pushed the coffin lid away and gestured to Li Kui to keep him quiet.

Through the gaps in the wooden boards above the head, I can see that the prisoners are tidying up the countertops, pouring wormwood water, and setting up incense tables to offer fruits.

Dai Zong and Song Jiang's prison car approached, and the surroundings were already crowded with onlookers. They threw rotten vegetables, leaves and rotten eggs at the two of them without saying a word, cursing loudly that the traitors deserve to die.

There were soldiers guarding within three feet of the execution platform, and no one was allowed to approach. The executioner slipped Dai Zong and Song Jiangti out and placed them in the cinnabar circle in the middle of the platform.

Song Jiang faced south, Dai Zong faced north, and tied back to back. First, they brushed glue on their hair, pulled out a goose pear corner, tied a red satin paper flower next to their ears, and drove them to the case of the blue-faced saint. In front of them, each handed a bowl of long-term meal and a bowl of farewell wine.

The executioner held up the ghost-headed knife and shouted: "Every evil is coming!" He danced around the stage with a big nuo, and waited for the sun to rise at three o'clock in the noon, and then executed immediately.

Dai Zong is a man who has seen the big world, so he ate a few mouthfuls of food and drank the wine calmly.

Song Jiang's black fat man was crying so much that his nose was full of tears, he refused to eat, he just drank the wine, opened his mouth and cried, "Song Jiang's life is cheap, but he died, but he has hurt you, brother."

Dai Zong smiled: "Brother, there is no need to say these things at this time, you and I are companions on the Huangquan Road, and we are not lonely."

The supervisor asked: "You two have any wishes before you die, you can tell them to the incense case."

Song Jiang looked back at the crowd and shouted: "Song Jiang was wronged. Song Jiang was not a traitor, but was framed by a villain. If anyone from the country knows that he came to Deyun County and told his father that Song Jiang is not filial, he must not be able to retire with him. The grace of nurturing will be repaid in the next life!"

The indifference of the audience was beyond my imagination. After hearing Song Jiang's words, not only no one shed tears of sympathy, but some people clapped their hands and applauded: "Thieves serve the army, but this is the only sentence? You can say a few more nice words, Tell us to meet you, a good man!"

"If you can't speak, you can sing twice! Can you sing? Speak once, sing once!"

The people below were talking, laughing, applauding, and applauding loudly. Song Jiang lowered his head, tears and snot staining that black face together.

Dai Zong looked around, then suddenly smiled and said, "Does anyone know someone named Ximen Qing? If so, please tell him.

It's not that Dai Zong broke his promise not to marry his sister, it's just that Dai Zong's life is short and poor, and he has no such fate with his sister.

Say goodbye today, separate Yin and Yang.We only hope that in the future, the Ximen brothers can find another better family for Yueniang, and teach her to be happy for the rest of her life, and Dai Zong can also smile at Jiuquan. "

I didn't hold back, tears welled up in my eyes and dripped all over my face.

Dai Zong, I read you right, you are a real man.

Don't worry, you and Yueniang's big matchmaker, I'm sure!

Li Kui next to him was about to cry again, so I squeezed his mouth tightly: "I've been hiding under this table all night, just for this moment, I'm holding you back so I can't make a sound."

Li Kui nodded, forcing back his tears.

After Dai Zong and Song Jiang finished talking, the scene was silent for a while.

Someone shouted: "Oh, just these two sentences? That's not good! Aren't you good guys all righteous? Let's open our eyes!"

Both Dai Zong and Song Jiang lowered their heads and shut their mouths tightly.

I tapped lightly on the bottom of their feet: "Don't keep talking, two big brothers, hurry up and say something to distract those people."

Dai Zong rolled his eyes: "Xi..."

"Shh! Brother Dai, you can sing and act even if you don't know how to speak! To attract their attention, I'll help you saw off the planks!"

Dai Zong and Song Jiang looked at each other, and Dai Zong whispered, "Brother Song Jiang, what can you sing?"

Song Jiang sniffed his nose: "I, I can't sing anything."

Dai Zong broke his heart: "Forget it, I'll sing, just sing the star that Brother Ximen taught us that night!"

What song is the star?Did I teach them to sing this?Could it be twinkle and twinkle?The sky is full of small eyes?