I'm in Delingha tonight

Xi Shan was joking, but Chi Nian knew it very well, and asked immediately, "How much do you still owe?"

Before the words finished, the person who was stunned became Xi Shan.

He looked at the changes in Chi Nian's expression, as if he was trying to identify whether Chi Nian was real or not.Embarrassed by being seen, Chi Nian clicked on mobile banking and seriously started to check his total assets.

Sitting on the sofa next to Xi Shan, Chi Nian directly showed him the numbers on the phone interface: "Here, I only have so much savings, 10,000+, and [-] of my wealth management is due in March, and the income is not bad... ...Oh, by the way, there is still some profit from Xiaopei's helping me with stock trading. In short, I will definitely help as much as I can—"

"Nian Nian." Xi Shan laughed, "Did you forget how you were cheated before?"

When he said that, Chi Nian was caught off guard and immediately shut up, with a "buzz" in his head, and then he was blinded.

In the living room in winter, the window was half opened, and the river wind poured into the house from a distance, but Chi Nian's back began to feel hot.He grabbed the corner of his clothes and didn't look up for a long time until the phone screen went black.

"It's different." Chi Nian whispered, "Don't make fun of this, it's very uncomfortable to hear."

For a moment, Xi Shan also realized that he had made a slip of the tongue.

The more familiar he was with Chi Nian—a person he had a crush on—the more conflicts seemed to arise.Xi Shan will not manage a relationship that is too close. If it is just a friendship, he can handle any situation properly, and he will always make mistakes when he wants to go further.

"I'm sorry." Xi Shan whispered, "I can't speak."

"I borrowed money from you because you are kind to me, and you are not that kind of person." Chi Nian was sullen for a while, and his tone was much more relaxed, "Forget it, if you don't think it's very good, then..."

"Don't be too nervous." Xi Shan handed the water glass on the table to Chi Nian, "It's not usury, it's just a mortgage. I can handle it by myself."

Chi Nian took a sip of water: "Hey, is it a mortgage?"

Xi Shan: "Just... some debts. I borrowed money from the bank to pay off the house in one go. Later, the house was successfully sold, and the bank also cleared it. There is still some balance. Now it is this apartment I plan to repay the mortgage in advance after the hot pot restaurant distributes the money at the end of the year... I bought it when I graduated from college, there is no provident fund, and the interest on commercial loans is too high."

Bank financial products and real estate transactions Chi Nian used to hear from his elders from time to time, and Zhuo Pei'an's family specializes in this. Xi Shan said a little bit, and he understood what was going on.

One for the other, although it sounds like you are always in debt, in fact, after careful consideration, it is still acceptable.In particular, Xishan's income level is not low, which does not affect his daily life.

As long as it is not usury, Chi Nian has watched too many TV dramas, and he is afraid that something vicious will happen that "I will cut off two of your fingers if you don't pay it off before the end of the year".

He put away his mobile phone: "Then I won't get involved."

"Thank you." Xi Shan replayed the inappropriate conversation in his mind for a while, and explained afterwards, "I...that kind of thing just now, next time you feel uncomfortable, you can directly mention it. I apologize."

Chi Nian had a big heart, and after a while, he no longer struggled with his words: "No, I know you didn't mean it."

"Because I don't know how to talk to..." Xi Shan was stuck for a moment, unable to find a word that fits the boundary of their relationship at the moment, and finally blurted it out, "Communicate with good friends... Sometimes what I want to say is not what I mean ...In the past, it was basically because of this that we broke up."

Xi Shan is 27 years old this year. Although he keeps secrets about his past, the only time he mentions his past is not a good face. Chi Nian can understand from the conversation between Zhu Yiming and Xi Shan that of course Xi Shan has several relationship experiences.

There is a high probability that a person's relationship will not meet someone who is willing to join hands for the rest of his life at the beginning of love. Xi Shan's conditions are good, and there are only a lot of men and women who like him.Adhering to "the past is like a cloud of smoke", it is not easy for two people to meet each other, so Chi Nian never showed concern.

But if you don't reveal it, you don't reveal it, as soon as Xi Shan said, his nerves tensed up immediately.

What's more, the meaning inside and outside the words of Xi Shan's words seems to compare his "good friend" with his "previous predecessors".

"because?"

"I feel...after being together, I'm not the same as when we were friends." Xi Shan was not annoyed or sullen when he mentioned these things, but a little confused, "The most common words people say are 'Why are you hurting people so much', Maybe it's a change of mentality, I don't know how to...get along with my boyfriend."

He said, "boyfriend".

The three words fell into his ears lightly, and Chi Nian pulled away the two voices that seemed to be fighting each other.Saying, "He wants you to be his boyfriend", and saying, "He means it's better to be friends".

Chi Nian's throat moved awkwardly, and he said, "Have you thought about changing it?"

"Thought about it." Xi Shan replied very simply, "But I always feel that a relationship that looks beautiful will come to the point of breaking up sooner or later, so it's better not to start."

"Because of uncle and aunt?"

Xi Shan acquiesced.

People who haven't experienced it may not understand. Parents are just divorced and their relationship is broken. Is the impact really that big?

Xi Shan grew up in a harmonious and loving family of three. He never imagined that he would face such a predicament one day. For him, "family" and "love" are dreams he has witnessed since he was a child.

As a result, once the dream was shattered by their own hands, it was still in an extremely embarrassing way.

"I know many people think it's nothing at all, but I just can't make it through." Xi Shan leaned back, staring blankly at the TV variety show guests and laughing awkwardly.

"Everyone is different."

"Yes, in order to get them to divorce, I accepted Xi Dongyang's condition for my mother and assumed their marital debts. It's not too much, around two hundred thousand, but it was enough for me at the time, my mother said If not, she just made do with it, and she didn't care. In the end, I thought about it and decided to come by myself—it just so happened that Qi Xing persuaded me to open a shop together. Good work."

Chi Nian couldn't help asking: "Uncle, don't you want to leave?"

"Of course he doesn't want to. It's so comfortable to have a red flag at home. He's very hypocritical. After getting the divorce certificate, he moved out of the house to live with Yang Cai. Now that he has this disease, it's retribution." Xi Shan Smile indifferently.

"Yang Cai?"

"It's the girl who called me last time to ask for money, and then came downstairs to play moral kidnapping again."

"she is not……"

Xi Shan casually grabbed a cushion and hugged it in his arms, resting his chin on it, as if it made him feel safe: "Last time, you and your students, I said some... bad things."

"I didn't take it to heart when I was angry."

"I know, you're fine. It's true that I overreacted, but the teacher-student relationship... At that time my dad cheated, and then," Xi Shan's voice was almost drowned in the crazy laughter and special effects of the variety show, "Yang Cai is his student."

Chi Nian didn't expect this to be related at all.

No wonder Xi Shan said, "Isn't teacher-student love disgusting?"

"Xi Dongyang taught middle school Chinese. At that time, she liked my dad. She put confession notes in her composition texts and excerpted love letters for weekly journals. Other teachers could feel it more or less.

"Once I went to school to find Xi Dongyang, and found her love letter in the test paper. I was not very old at that time, and I panicked at the first time. I took the love letter and thought it was just a coincidence. But in fact, at that time Xi Dongyang started to have an affair with her. He didn't confirm the relationship, and he didn't have any deviant behavior. He was very smart and would not let himself lose his job.

"Yang Cai graduated not long after, she is not going to college in Chongqing, and her family has lived a happy life for a few years.

"When my university was about to end, one day I didn't have class, went home early after going to the gym, and met Yang Cai downstairs and left in a hurry. At that time, I understood everything. Xi Dongyang has never broken contact with her, and he is grandiose. Bring someone into the house while my mother is on a business trip."

When Xi Shan said this, he turned his head and asked Chi Nian, "Guess what was my first reaction at that time?"

"revenge……?"

"Yes, my personality is a bit extreme. Yang Cai looked at me like a victor looking at other people's embarrassment. I will never forget her evasive and excited eyes downstairs at my house. After returning home, I tried When the topic of men cheating was brought up, Xi Dongyang didn't take it seriously and said, 'Men make mistakes'. I suddenly became furious and pointed out, 'I saw your student leave our house just now'.

"Then Xi Dongyang said nonchalantly, 'She's not my student now, and it won't affect me and your mother.'"

On the Nanshan Observation Deck, Xi Shan's expression was almost the same as now - his eyes were red, and every sentence was soft, but he must be gnashing his teeth.

Chi Nian couldn't help himself, and reached out to hold him.

"At that time... I really wanted to go to the kitchen to get a knife and chop him up!" Xi Shan took a deep breath, "He knew that I didn't shy away from seeing Yang Cai at all, except for occasionally avoiding my mother, he guessed right I worry that my mother will be sad and it is impossible to make any waves at home."

"why is it like this……"

"I don't understand, Xi Dongyang has been a good father and husband for 15 years, why did he suddenly change his gender? Is Yang Cai the first, or there are more Yang Cai before and after that?"

"I hate Yang Cai, but I hate him even more. I asked again, 'Are you going to get a divorce?', and after Xi Dongyang said 'No', I was so angry that I slammed the door and left." Xi Shan squeezed Chi Nian's hand, "It was raining heavily that day, and I wanted to go to my mother's work unit and tell her everything. I drove by myself, had poor vision and was very emotional, and that accident happened."

Chi Nian recalled the first time he talked about the car accident.

Similar to his stress reaction when he mentioned Zhou Hengwen at that time, Xi Shan probably also left behind a psychological shadow that has not healed to this day, so he is so worried about Yu Sixian's car accident?

Sure enough, Xi Shan said: "Not long after I got into a car accident, Sixian also got into a car accident."

"How can there be such a coincidence, it's like telling me that if there is a slight deviation that day, I will die."

Since then, all the rainy days, all the red lights during the countdown, and all the hooting of the hospital ambulance have become Xi Shan's lingering nightmare.In the darkness that made him wake up in a cold sweat in the middle of the night, he couldn't break free.

Love, relatives, and friendship crushed him one after another.

"I'm devastated. I must divorce my mother and Xi Dongyang as soon as possible." Xi Shan paused and said calmly, "But you have seen my mother today. She values ​​face more than anything else, even if Xi Dongyang hurts her. After leaving this family, she can bear it as long as she can get by."

"Maybe Auntie's thinking is different from yours..."

Xi Shan nodded: "But I didn't know at that time. I personally destroyed their 'reasonable' marriage, just because I felt that the perfect family could not go back—she blamed me in her heart and insisted on The turmoil was unstoppable, and the relationship has not been fully repaired over the years."

Chi Nian was speechless.

Xi Shan's emotions were suppressed and might erupt at any time, but he was trying his best to endure.

He breathed a sigh of relief: "But as I get older, my mood is different. Although I still feel sick when I see Yang Cai, and I feel sick when I mention Xi Dongyang, but since the day of divorce, whether he died or lived has nothing to do with me. , no need to screw up my life by hating him anymore. He's just a stranger to me now."

When Xi Shan said this, he pulled his hair irritably: "I understand the truth, but I just can't completely free myself. I always think... afraid of rainy days, afraid of hospitals."

"..."

"I also feel that I am a very bad person. If I get too close, I can't get along with anyone. Nian Nian, you didn't know me before, I am very bad."

"But you are not now." Chi Nian said without hesitation, "There are a lot of bad emotions and reactions, because it has been too long. This is not 'escape'."

Xi Shan's pupils contracted slightly, and his voice was like a mosquito: "Really."

"That's right, so when you agreed to lend money to Yang Cai on the road, you probably thought, 'This time it's over and there will be no more'. But would Xi Shan have done that in that year? I think he probably wanted to I pulled out those pipes myself." Chi Nian touched Xi Shan's back.

"..."

"Don't hate me anymore, Brother Xi, you are moving forward."

"yes."

"So I won't change back to my previous self, don't be afraid."

——"I'm pulling you."