The evolutionary history from a scumbag to a loyal dog

Lu Yingchen sat blankly on a chair in the corridor, watching Yan Mufeng who appeared an hour or two later walked into Tang Yuchen's ward.

Tang Shaofei came here with Yan Mufeng, but the two of them never looked at him from the time they appeared to when they entered.

Later, Tang Shaofei came out first. He stood at the door for a while, glanced at the situation inside, and then looked at Lu Yingchen who was sitting alone, motionless, with a complex expression on his face.Maybe Tang Shaofei wanted to go over and say a few words to Lu Yingchen, but in the end he withdrew his outstretched steps, sighed a few times, and walked away with a half-smile and a helpless expression.

Yan Mufeng also came out shortly after Tang Shaofei came out, but he was not as indifferent as Tang Shaofei.

Lu Yingchen raised his head, and saw Yan Mufeng looking at him with disgust and disdain in his eyes - this Yan Mufeng, who always treats people coldly, seldom expresses his emotions so clearly.

"Lu Yingchen, I'm not talking about you, your behavior this time is really rubbish."

"Maybe in your eyes, I'm just a piece of trash."

Lu Yingchen knew that it would be better if he didn't speak up under such circumstances, but when he heard Yan Mufeng's evaluation of himself, he couldn't help laughing at himself.

"As long as you know."

Lu Yingchen didn't look up, but saw Yan Mufeng approaching him a few steps.

He listened to Yan Mufeng and said: "You made him like this, do you know? You made a person who is willing to give everything for you like this, Lu Yingchen, don't you feel ashamed at all?"

Everyone was blaming him, and everyone was pointing their noses at him and telling him that he was the one who caused Tang Yuchen to be like this.

Even if he, the "culprit", is the most heartbroken now, no one is willing to believe that he is actually the person he least wants Tang Yuchen to become.

His utterance, or his silence, is only arousing everyone's dissatisfaction with him.

Seeing that he didn't answer, Yan Mufeng continued: "Lu Yingchen, please do it yourself."

Good for it.

It wasn't the first time he heard these four words. It seemed that a long time ago, after Tang Yuchen's accident disappeared, countless people came to him and said, "You can do it yourself - this is a tactful way of saying it."He has also heard someone say it more directly in front of him, it seems to be - Lu Yingchen, you deserve it, you deserve it.

Yes, he admitted that he was absolutely to blame for the feeling of extreme despair and pain when he lost Tang Yuchen.

But he really didn't want the reason or result of this self-inflicted blame to be that Tang Yuchen had been hurt.

Since he was the one who did the wrong thing, he should be the one to bear everything... But why is it Tang Yuchen who is suffering the physical injury, whether it is reality or the infinite paradise?

He could attribute everything he suffered to his own fault, but Tang Yuchen was innocent. Even if Tang Yuchen would never forgive him in his life, he still hoped that Tang Yuchen could live a good life.

Lu Yingchen sat there alone, it seemed that he sat there for a long time, until his body became stiff and numb; but it didn't seem long, because he remembered too many things that he seemed to have forgotten for a while, and he couldn't recall them all.

How could he forget that he had promised Tang Yuchen that they would move to a city without winter in the future.

Their fantasies at that time were beautiful, and they both firmly believed that they would come true, and they would have a city that never winters without disturbance and gossip.

Tang Yuchen wanted to raise a cat very much, but she kept putting this plan on hold because she was too busy to take care of her.So they said yes, when the time comes, you must raise a cute and clingy cat, and take it to bask in the sun in the garden every day.They also agreed that a beautiful koi pond must be arranged in the new house, with carp of various colors in it.

He asked Tang Yuchen then, what if their cat couldn't accept the temptation and went into the water to steal fish?

Tang Yuchen replied suspiciously but cautiously: "Didn't it mean that cats are afraid of water? They shouldn't jump into the pond just to catch a fish that they might not be able to catch, right?"

It wasn't without distractions, it wasn't without low tides.

But there will be a person who will always be by his side, and he never thinks about what he needs to give up.

Memories are silent, but the most profound, engraved in my heart.

When Lu Yingchen felt that his vision had become hazy, he heard Tang Yuchen's ward door opened again, and it was Xiao Mumu who walked out.

Every time she took a step, the sound of high heels rubbing against the tiled floor made Lu Yingchen feel his heart tighten.

Until she said: "Tang Yuchen woke up, you go in."

He heaved a sigh of relief, fortunately here, he didn't have to suffer from despair again.

Lu Yingchen finally stepped into Tang Yuchen's ward after sitting at the door for six hours.

He always remembered that Xiao Mumu said that if Tang Yuchen couldn't make it through the eight hours, he would just pass by.

At first it was anticipation, he always imagined that someone would come out and tell him that Tang Yuchen woke up and Tang Yuchen was fine in the next second; then it was anxiety, when counting the time passing by, he felt like he was counting The countdown that the heart in the chest is about to stop is as helpless and fearful; in the end, it is numbness and irritability, and there is no taste more bitter than waiting for a news that is already inclined to bad news.

But when he was able to step into Tang Yuchen's ward, Lu Yingchen was so heartbroken that he was about to cry.

Fortunately, here, he doesn't have to endure the pain of losing the person in front of him again.

But seeing Tang Yuchen's state, Lu Yingchen was still genuinely guilty and embarrassed.

Looking at Tang Yuchen from the window before, Lu Yingchen only saw his left hand that had turned black - but now, he saw half of Tang Yuchen's face, already invaded by that terrible blackness.

The ward was very quiet, just the two of them.

Seeing that he didn't speak, Tang Yuchen opened his mouth first to break the solemn silence. He pretended to smile relaxedly, with a small cry that could not be ignored: "Why, did you become ugly? I looked in the mirror just now, and I also I was taken aback by myself."

This is the person he has been dreaming about for so long, this is the person he has missed so many times, and this is the person he dreams about in the middle of the night and wants to express his apologies.

This is false, and there will still be reason to remind myself in my mind.

But he admits it, no matter how many times the fantasy repeats itself, no matter how intimate or sad it appears, he admits it.

He stretched out his hand to caress Tang Yuchen's half of his face that was still infected in the end, and he could only say, "I'm sorry, it's all my fault."

The most pale and useless thing is sorry, but all I can say at this time is sorry.

"It's okay." This is the most authentic Tang Yuchen in Lu Yingchen's memory. Whether it's his tone of voice or his temper towards others, he is always gentle and kind. Even if he has become like this, he can still say to Lu Yingchen, "I don't blame you , No matter what, I never thought of blaming you."

Hands trembling.

This sentence, Tang Yuchen's once "No matter what, I won't blame you", became his reassurance during that heartless period.It was precisely because no matter what he did wrong, Tang Yuchen would forgive him; no matter what he did, Tang Yuchen would not have the "privilege" of opposing opinions that made him start to become self-righteous.

He was completely spoiled by Tang Yuchen's unconditional tolerance, to the point where he had a bad temper and self-inflated.

He knew that betrayal seemed to have inertia, and if he didn't restrain himself in time to recognize and reflect, there would definitely be a next time - but when he got Tang Yuchen's forgiveness for his first mistake, he thought that he would be forgiven countless times in the future.

He even thought that it was his own merits that made Tang Yuchen obsessed with Tang Yuchen, and that Tang Yuchen would not be able to live without him. Looking at Tang Yuchen, but when he began to feel that he was superior to Tang Yuchen in his heart, the original equality with each other no longer existed.

It wasn't until he lost it later that he felt personally that who was inseparable between the two of them.

When Tang Yuchen left, he realized that the reason why Tang Yuchen tolerated him was not because of how good he was, but because Tang Yuchen simply loved himself deeply.

Love can make Tang Yuchen blind, and it can also make Tang Yuchen desperate.

The pain made Tang Yuchen wake up, and it also made Tang Yuchen realize the reality.

After Tang Yuchen left with love, Lu Yingchen realized that without Tang Yuchen who loved him, he was nothing.

"You cried." When Tang Yuchen spoke, Lu Yingchen also realized that there were tears on his cheeks.

Tang Yuchen gently wiped away his tears with his intact right hand.

Tang Yuchen's fingertips were cool, but his tone was still gentle: "If you cry, it won't look like you."

Lu Yingchen couldn't control it any longer, he held Tang Yuchen's right hand, lowered his head and closed his eyes tightly, not daring to open them, apologizing over and over again: "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry...it's my fault, it's all my fault , I shouldn't hurt you, I shouldn't lie to you, I shouldn't betray you, I shouldn't abandon you... I really have no face, no face to ask your forgiveness..."

Tang Yuchen soon felt that the wet and warm liquid soaked his five fingers, and the overflowing part dripped onto the white quilt, seeping into a dizzy area.

Tang Yuchen moved in his direction a few times, pulled out his right hand and then hugged him with one hand: "In that case...you will stay by my side from now on, don't leave me again."

This beautiful temptation is like an invitation to a decadent opening.

"Lu Yingchen, I don't want to lose you anymore, so just stay by my side. Only when I'm by your side can I feel that my life is meaningful." But this temptation is so beautiful that people can't say no.

The author has something to say: I feel a little confused after coding at night