Old Fogey Goes Down The Mountain

Yu Cui's hands were frantically typing on the keyboard, her mind was focused like never before, as if the most attractive thing in the world was the monitor screen in front of her.

The results brought about by such an efficient working method are very obvious. The report that used to take almost a whole day was completed in an hour and a half today.

The moment she pressed the last Enter key, her spirit suddenly slowed down, her mind was in a trance, and then she returned to her senses.

At this time, the manager passed by the outer office and glanced at her computer, his eyes lit up, and he leaned over to check: "I always see you playing with your mobile phone in the tea room recently. I thought you were lazy, not bad, very good, very good, Keep up the good work."

Yu Cui, who has always been muddling along in the project team and being a transparent little guy, has not heard such encouragement from the leader in a long time. After being flattered to send the leader away, she slumped into the office chair again incomprehensible—just now What happened to the sudden burst of enthusiasm for work is too inexplicable.

But she soon discovered that the weirdness in herself was far more than that.

When she went to the cafeteria to eat together at noon, she found that the rare fried chicken pork chops and cakes were served in the window today.She has always been greedy, loves these high-calorie foods the most, and lacks restraint, and never restrains herself when she encounters them.Therefore, while being happy, she thought to herself that it was over, and the weight loss plan might have to be shelved again, because she always had to stuff herself up to her throat before she would give up on such a good day.

But who would have thought that as soon as this thought appeared, her mind immediately cooled down.

Looking at the dishes with the plate in hand, she found that she was not as irrationally salivating as before. After thinking about it, she finally only ordered the portion that she could almost eat, which caused the colleagues in the same industry to be shocked: "Oh my God! Yu Cui, what's the matter with you? Normally, three pork chops are not enough to fill your teeth, are you feeling unwell today?"

Yu Cui also felt strange: "I don't know, I just feel like I don't need to eat so much."

After eating the food that was less than one-third of the usual lunch, she found that she also felt full, and this just right feeling of fullness was actually much more comfortable than before when she couldn't walk.

Seeing her rarely eating slowly, her colleagues exchanged glances in shock. When did this guy control himself so much?

But this was just the beginning of their surprise. After the lunch break, someone in the office proposed to buy milk tea together. Yu Cui, who has always been the main force in ordering, stared intently at the work on the computer and did not join in for the first time: "I seem to I don’t really want to drink, so let’s finish this word first.”

All the colleagues in the office were startled by this time. Yu Cui's performance was so embarrassing that she had nothing to say when she got off work. Gym card, right? I don’t know why I want to run so much today, can you wait for me, let’s go together today.”

Everyone: "!!!!"

***

When she came out exhausted from the gym, it was already the willow shoot on the moon, Yu Cui walked home under the moonlight, slumped on the sofa in the living room and stared at the ceiling in a trance.

Unbelievable, she insisted on running five kilometers today, and went for a lap after the run.

What's even more frightening is that she walked away without hesitation when she encountered a fragrant barbecue stall after she came out, thinking about the calories she had burned so hard.During the exercise, she never had the idea of ​​giving up and taking a bath as before, and her mind was still filled with the belief that the task must be completed.

Yu Cui knows that this sense of belief is actually the self-control mentioned in the chicken soup soft articles she has read on various social networks for a long time.

Why wake up at eight o'clock on time and go to bed before ten o'clock, read a new book every month, go to the gym on time every day, etc. Such a schedule is indeed posted on the TV wall of her home!But knowing the so-called truths, she still can't live a good life. She has never had such a thing as self-control!Get up at eight o'clock and read a book every day!If you don't stay in bed, is that still life?Staying up late and playing with your phone is the best, okay?Where is watching classics more interesting than watching TV series?Isn't that kind of terrifying self-control a skill that only the legendary protagonist's personality can possess!

Thinking of this, Yu Cui glanced at the wall clock on the wall again. It was nine o'clock, which was her daily time to watch dramas and play with her mobile phone, but at this moment she only wanted to take a shower and sleep.

Oh my god, I'm not being pierced by some protagonist's soul, am I?Is it necessary to change my temperament from now on and embark on the road to success?

She couldn't help shivering while she was secretly delighted, but she still subconsciously undressed to take a bath, before she undressed, she fumbled in her pocket and was stunned.

She took out the things she touched, and under the warm light, a piece of yellow talisman paper with an unknown pattern lay quietly in the palm of her hand.

There was a sudden shock in her mind. After a few seconds of stunned, she quickly took out her mobile phone and clicked on the Weibo page. After a few seconds, she found the post on the home page that she had seen before but had almost forgotten by now——

Wei Xi V: →_→ On the right, the mantra of clearing the heart is derived from the "Tao Ben Zhen Jing", which means "cleaning the heart and eliminating thoughts". Please keep the received disciples carefully and wear them with you. It can clear away distracting thoughts and strengthen the original thoughts. . //@I am the first to do things: You really take this feudal superstition seriously, it is obviously a joke with you...//@Before the end of the year, I must be thin: ah, ah, master, master, I won the prize!What is this purifying mantra for?

Eliminate distracting thoughts and strengthen your original thoughts...

When Yu Cui saw these words, she was shocked immediately, she slowly moved her eyes away from the phone screen, and looked back at her palm again.

That's right, I wanted to do the report so strongly at the beginning of today, didn't it start when I received the courier and stuffed this spell into my pocket!

But how is this possible?Aren't spells just a joke of feudal superstition?Still have firm beliefs, relying on a piece of talisman to have self-control or something... Isn't it incredible? !

When Yu Cui thought about it, she also felt that she had too much brains. She couldn't help laughing awkwardly at her own thoughts, and put this talisman paper on the armrest of the sofa.

The moment the talisman was released from her hands, an inexplicable sense of fatigue suddenly swept over, and Yu Cui felt that her sober mind had also gone numb. She stood still and looked in the direction of the bathroom, and the thought of taking a bath also stopped. paused.

It's past nine o'clock...it's still early...

So why wash up and go to bed so early, why not watch a TV series before going, the TV series I followed recently has been updated...

And I really want to eat supper. Although I really want to lose weight, the nearby crayfish takeaway is really good, and it should be fine to eat crayfish once in a while...

She thought so, and at the same time clicked on the familiar takeaway app, and chose the three-pound garlic lobster. It was only a second before placing the order that she was awakened by the sore muscles swimming on her arms.

What am I doing?I have worked so hard to restrain myself all day, how come this hour has failed me again!

The light of the mobile phone made Yu Cui confused for a while, she stood there silent for a long time, then turned her head mechanically little by little, her eyes fell on the fluffy talisman paper on the armrest of the sofa in disbelief.

Do not!meeting!Bar!

****

When Yu Cui excitedly logged into the account and was about to describe her experience, she realized that someone had already arrived one step ahead of her, which caused the comment area under the Weibo of Taicang Zong's lottery to explode into a mess.

A total of ten people were drawn for the Qingxin Mantra lottery, and the winners had more or less similar experiences to Yu Cui.

Procrastination is a very common ailment among contemporary people. After all, there are so many entertainment activities in life, and work and study are boring and hard. Except for a few people with exceptionally strong willpower, who dares to say that they can resist these temptations and bury themselves in boring things? Where?

So the student party cried bitterly: [Teacher and tutor saw me: Oh my god, I am a Buddha, Master, I am really a Buddha. I am always groggy when I am not in the state, and I am afraid of reading books. I am really worried that I will fail. Who knew that I would listen to it with great interest in class after wearing it, and even did a whole book of questions!I feel that I suddenly understand a lot of things that I can't listen to!Thank you Master!I am confident now, and decided to completely retreat and review online, and I will definitely come back to fulfill my wish when I succeed in the postgraduate entrance examination!May Master bless you! 】

The Worker Party sighed: [Middle-aged greasy salted fish: ...... I have lived for more than 30 years, and I feel like a young pioneer for the first time. I used to save dirty clothes and smelly socks for two months and didn’t bother to wash them every day and was scolded every day. Every day when I open my eyes, I feel full of energy and want to work.My wife was moved and cried when she saw me doing laundry and cleaning. The pocket money was doubled. The company leaders also praised me every day, and let me know that I stood out from the whole project team for my serious work. A few days ago I was favored by the big leader, because I am not young, and I may consider the personnel change at the end of the month and give me an upward adjustment.What the hell is this heart-purifying mantra, it's completely unbelievable, Nima. 】

However, this kind of comment is at most just a few words of surprise and congratulations. What really sparked heated discussions among netizens was a perennial weight loss professional like Yu Cui——

[You must be thin before the end of the year: Fans on the homepage of the truth know that I am a person who has no self-control. I have been talking about losing weight for so many years, but I still signed "Supper is my life".However, since I received this heart-clearing mantra, I don't know if it is a psychological effect, but I am fucking like it!pause!night!night!All!without!have!eat!Just want to go to the gym after get off work!I just want to fuck!Just want to swim!Just want to gain muscle!I hate sports people so much!It's not painful at all and it's fun!Eating fitness meals is also super fun!Today my waistline has been reduced to 73cm!The face is a whole circle smaller!Now the whole person is extremely confident.I unilaterally declare that from today onwards, I will be an apprentice of Taicang Sect!As long as you can continue to lose weight, you will never betray your master! 】

This weight loss professional is an influential funny Internet celebrity on the Internet. On her homepage, she explained in detail the psychological changes that occurred after wearing the Qingxin Mantra. Visible changes in body photos.There are pictures and the truth, except for a few doubts on her blog, all other fans are boiling, and they flock to the Taicang Zongguan blog——

***

Tuanjieyi managed to finish drawing another wave of new spells that his younger brother punished him for copying, but he was so startled by the news notifications that sounded one after another that he almost lost his pen.

When he opened his account, he saw thousands of messages flooding his face like a tsunami.

【Ahhhhhhhhhhhh I beg for a weight loss talisman, Master! ! ! ! 】

【Master!Will the weight loss symbol still be forwarded in a lottery! !You can buy it with money! ! ! 】

[Is the rule here called Master?Then let me call you too, Master!Today, it is said that it has broken [-] catties!Save the children! ! 】

Unity: "..."

What the hell is a weight loss talisman?He couldn't figure it out for a while, and when he saw what happened, he was suddenly stunned.

How did a good heart-cleaning mantra become a weight-loss talisman?It was obviously difficult to learn, and he was punished by his junior for copying it thousands of times. As a result, such a compelling name was changed casually by this group of people!

However, he was so angry that he was still very welcome to do business. Seeing that the market was open, he immediately climbed up and opened a Taobao store to sell his stock.

There are doubts about this. After all, in the age of technology, it is a bit of a fantasy to make people believe that a talisman can help people live a regular life.But so what?What tricks have people who really want to lose weight not tried?Is it very scientific to take diet pills and go on a diet?In addition, there are also lazy cancer patients who are deeply troubled by procrastination but never have enough self-control to correct it, eager to change their lives.These people just hesitated and placed an order to buy this life-saving straw. Anyway, the price is not too expensive. Even if they are cheated, they are just paying an extra IQ tax.

***

Taicangzong, a strange company, gradually became known on the Internet.

Uncle Zhao, an offline believer, also delivered the incense burner he promised.

Wei Xi originally thought that what he was going to donate was just a small incense burner, but unexpectedly this believer was so devout, what he brought was a big copper tripod more than one meter high.

Shu Wanrong almost fainted when she saw this thing delivered to her door: "Well, this thing will not be moved to the house, will it?" Then the husband will faint when he sees it?

Wei Xi looked at the size of the object, and nodded to indicate that it was not feasible: "It really doesn't make sense to put it in the room."

As soon as Shu Wanrong was relieved, she heard him say: "This incense burner is so magnificent, it should be placed at the gate of the courtyard to be worshiped by people. It should be placed on the other side of the Zongmen stele."

Shu Wanrong: "..."

Shu Wanrong watched desperately as the workers put the big incense burner at the gate of the courtyard, and almost saw the tragic scene of her husband hanged at the gate of the house in the middle of the night in a rage.

At this time, Tuanjieyi contacted the courier and came to help after the stock was delivered, so he lied next to the master and complained coquettishly, and mentioned that his high-quality Qingxin mantra was renamed by netizens as a weight loss charm.

Wei Xi didn't understand half of what he heard, so he could only pat his head comfortingly, and the second apprentice immediately looked over coolly: "The Purifying Mantra is to help practitioners strengthen their beliefs and eliminate distracting thoughts. It is very useful. Only paying attention to its effect of aiding weight loss is the reason why you have too little practice and insufficient skill. If you draw another [-] pictures, you may break through."

When Tuanjieyi heard that his junior was about to punish him for drawing talismans again, he was so frightened that he was scared out of his wits: "No! I'm already proficient in drawing talismans!"

Wei Xi was also very curious about how his senior disciple, who was particularly stupid in practice, was doing with his talisman learning. Seeing him resisting his homework like this, he simply spread his hands: "Give me a picture of the Qingxin spell you drew."

Tuanjieyi happened to have a piece of paper in his pocket that encouraged him to work hard to deliver the goods, so he immediately took it out and gave it to him. Weixi held it and looked around. Apart from the ugly drawing, he couldn't see anything that needed improvement.

He looked around and saw Shu Wanrong standing at the door staring at the censer with a dazed expression on his face. He simply reached out and patted the talisman on Shu Wanrong's back.

Immediately, Shu Wanrong visibly cheered up, and her eyes became radiant, as if she was very eager to do something.

Wei Xi asked him, "Wanrong, what do you want to do now?"

When Shu Wanrong heard his question, she became more and more anxious, and started to trot on the spot, eager to answer: "I...I want...I want to go to the spa!"

Wei Xi: "..."

Wei Xi frowned and tore off the talisman paper from her back, looked left and right again, and this time saw Wei Chengshu, who was sitting on the stepladder with a gloomy face, scrubbing the sect plaque, and stuck it on Wei Chengshu again. special legs.

Wei Chengshu was carrying a rag and the big iron bucket he had replaced, and his gloomy expression changed instantly. Wei Xi asked him, "Chengshu, what do you want to do?"

Wei Chengshu sat on the ladder with his legs spread apart, his lips murmured, as if it was difficult to speak, and he held back his breath after a long while and said: "...I want to go racing, go to the bar."

Wei Xi frowned even more, and tore off the charm and gave it back to the senior apprentice: "The spell of pure heart helps people clear away distracting thoughts, but they don't want to water the flowers and wipe the signboards, they only think about going out to play, so it's really not very good."

Unity: "..."