Clear Feather of the Ring

He stayed in the cubicle for more than an hour before coming out, standing in front of the sink, pouring cold water on his face over and over again to wash away the wet tears on his face, but the tears kept gushing from his eyes Come out, run down the cold water, no matter how you wash it, it won't be clean.

He raised his head and looked at himself in the mirror, as if he saw another Yi Qing.At that moment, he was finally able to empathize with him. It was the heart-wrenching desire to get closer but not to be able to, the painful desire to love but not to be able to.

He touched himself in the mirror, and brushed every inch of the person's face in the mirror with his fingertips, as if what he brushed was every second, every inch and every second that Yi Qing had struggled to support in the past seven years, was painful He shed tears involuntarily.

Yi Qing, I love you, but I still can't catch you, even though I know you still love me.

In order not to let his mother see that he was different from the past, Long Tianyu did not greet his mother after leaving the bathroom, but went back to the company, and after finishing some affairs, he returned to his bedroom and closed the doors and windows tightly. Strictly, the room was enveloped in pitch darkness, and then fell into a deep sleep.

When he woke up, it was already night. After sitting on the bed for a while, he got up and went to the bathroom. He stood under the shower head and rinsed for nearly half an hour. After washing, his whole body lost the slightest bit of heat. Clean clothes, drove to the hospital.

My mother had already had dinner and was lying on the bed, staring at the TV on the wall boredly. When he saw him coming in, a smile appeared on her face: "Why didn't you tell Mom in the morning? Is there anything urgent? Why didn't Xiao Yao come with you?"

"I have something to do at the company. I answered the phone and went back. I forgot to come back to tell you. Yao Yao went back to accompany her parents at night, so she won't be here tonight." Long Tianyu carried a box of pomegranates into his mother's ward In the middle of the day, I took out a dozen pomegranates from the box, and asked the special nurse to peel all the pomegranates in the fruit bowl, wash them and serve them to my mother.

He passed the fruit supermarket on the way, thinking that his mother likes to eat pomegranates, and it is not easy to buy them in this season, but he stopped to try his luck, and unexpectedly, a box of them was airlifted from the store, with thin skin and big and sweet seeds , I bought them all at a high price.

Long Ma looked at the big bowl of red pomegranate seeds that the special guard brought over, and she was very happy, "Ah, I haven't eaten this for a long time, why did you think of buying this for Mom?" She scooped it up with a spoon as she spoke. I ate it with a spoonful.

Long Tianyu held the bowl for her, and asked with a smile, "Is it sweet?"

"Sweet. Come, my son will take a bite too." Long Ma said, taking a spoonful and bringing it to Long Tianyu's mouth.

Long Tianyu opened his mouth and ate the spoonful. As soon as he bit down on his teeth, sweet juice flowed out. He tasted it in his mouth, but it was sour that made him want to cry.

He couldn't bear it, and now whenever he saw his mother's face, and when he remembered that he would never have the chance to see this face again in the near future, he couldn't help but burst into tears.

The pomegranates in his mouth were like small stones, which made it difficult for him to swallow.Facing his mother's smiling face, he couldn't pretend any longer, so he stood up quickly, walked to the water fountain, turned his back to his mother, and took the opportunity of catching the water to secretly spit all the pomegranates in his mouth to the next door. in the trash.

Long Ma really likes to eat this, and she ate half a bowl at once. She is used to eating pomegranates without spitting out seeds. Make juice for mother to drink.

He watched TV with his mother for a while, and waited until the special nurse came in to help his mother wash up. When it was time to go to bed, Long Ma didn't see him leave: "Mom is going to rest, you should go back early and come back tomorrow."

"I'll sleep here tonight, with you." Long Tianyu turned off the TV, turned off the lights, and kept the two small dim lights by the bedside on, so as not to see his mother getting up in the middle of the night and not being able to see anything in the bathroom.

He just took off his coat, then lay down on the bed where the nurse usually slept with all his clothes on, and said to his mother, "Mom, if you feel uncomfortable at night, you must call me."

Lying on the bed over there, Long Ma replied in a low voice, "Yes."

Long Tianyu lay sideways on the bed, with his face facing his mother's side of the bed, looking at the outline of his mother's face in the half-light by the light at the head of the bed.

Maybe it was mother and child, Long Tianyu looked at it for a while, Long Ma seemed to have a sense, the person who was lying on his back and closed his eyes and fell asleep suddenly turned sideways, facing Long Tianyu, Opening his eyes, he met Long Tianyu.

The mother and son lay on the bed and looked at each other quietly for a while separated by a short distance.

"Tian Yu, don't be afraid, Mom won't leave." Long Ma said after a long time.

After hearing these words, Long Tianyu immediately shed tears and dripped onto the pillow towel.He clenched the bed sheet tightly with his hands, exerted his strength secretly, and tried to calm his voice: "Well, I'm not afraid."

He heard the sound of his mother turning over the quilt, thinking that his mother was going to get up, and hurriedly got out of bed to help his mother, but his mother stopped him: "Mom is fine, just lie down."

When I heard the voice, I realized that my mother was crying.

Long Tianyu got out of bed softly, walked to his mother's bed, and slowly lay down next to her. Through the quilt, he hugged his mother vigorously, held back his tears, and comforted his mother: "Mom, I'm here , with me."

"Son." Long Ma buried her head in the bed and only called out once, and then couldn't hold it back any longer and cried out.How many nights, she stayed up all night because she was worried that she would never wake up and never see Tianyu again.How many times, watching the back of his son leaving, a person stood in front of the window and stared at the exit of the hospital downstairs, not wanting to miss every minute and every second of seeing his son.

She forced a smile in front of her son, who knew how many painkillers and injections he took when Long Tianyu couldn't see him.She knew that her body would not last long, and facing this fact, like everyone who was about to die, she was terrified and terrified.However, besides being a terminally ill woman, she was also Long Tianyu's mother.Mother, even though she was scared and frightened, she still pretended to be okay to comfort her son.

Tonight was the first time she lost control of her illness in front of Long Tianyu, and accidentally exposed herself in front of her son as a fragile woman who needed someone to protect her.

Long Tianyu hugged his mother, with his cheek pressed against the quilt, tears streaming silently.He hoarsely said, "Mom, everything is fine, why are you crying. It will be my engagement day in a few days, and you should be happy."

"Yu, Mom dreamed about your dad last night, and your dad said he came to see us." Long Ma cried and said, "Mom is so scared, what should you do if Mom leaves? Mom doesn't worry. You, mom is gone, you are alone..." Sadness is like a flood, coming violently, as if to vent all the worries and anxieties of the past few months at once, Long Ma cried uncontrollably.She turned over, her face was full of tears and snot, she stretched out her hand from under the quilt, and hugged Long Tianyu back, crying convulsively.

Long Tianyu held her tightly until his mother stopped crying and fell asleep in his arms.

Waiting until his mother fell asleep, Long Tianyu quietly let go of his mother, got up and went to the bathroom, soaked the washcloth in warm water, wrung it half dry, and then walked out, using the light by the bedside, gently Gently washed my mother's face.

He remembered that when he was very young, he was lying on the bed with a cold and a fever, and his mother sat on the head of his bed like this, patiently wiping his sweat over and over again, and softly asking himself what delicious food he wanted to eat.At that time, my mother didn't have these small wrinkles on her face, her cheeks were not as pale and thin, and her lips were not as bloodless as they are now.

He wiped it carefully, and the tears fell down. He was afraid that it would fall on his mother's face and wake her up, so he had to wipe his tears with one hand and his mother's face with the other.

After wiping, he sat on the bedside and stared at his mother for a long time, until his body was stiff, then he stood up, walked out of the ward, closed the door softly, walked to the window on the side of the corridor, and looked at the dark outside. The painted night sky was in a daze.

Long Tianyu stood for a while, took out his mobile phone, and checked the time. Just as he was about to put the mobile phone back into his pocket, he seemed to remember something, and turned on the mobile phone again.He turned to the column of contacts, and kept scrolling down until he reached the column of Yi Qing.That was the number he got when he sent someone to investigate Yi Qing, and he saved it in his cell phone, but he never called it once.

He looked at the name on the phone, want to call it?What if the call is over, say sorry to him?But how can he make up for what he has experienced in the past with a single sorry?Or tell him I love you and get engaged right away?

The phone went dark and turned on again. He turned it off and on again and again, and finally dialed the number uncontrollably. He hung up the phone immediately after dialing several times, his heart pounding uncontrollably. jump straight.

While he hoped that Yi Qing would receive his call immediately, he also prayed that he would not hear the call.

So, when he called again and wanted to hang up immediately after three rings, when he heard a "Hello" from the other side, he almost dropped the phone in his hand.

"Hello," said another sentence over there.

Long Tianyu held the phone tightly and stuck it to his ear, not wanting to miss the slightest sound coming from the other end of the phone.

"Hello, who is it?" After waiting for a while, he still didn't hear an answer, so he asked again.

Yi Qing's voice was clean and clear, like a gust of wind, blowing into his ears, brushing over his cheeks, with a little coolness, moistening half of his heart.Long Tianyu's throat was dry and hoarse, he swallowed hard to moisten his mouth, then opened his mouth, wanting to say something, but in the end, he still didn't say a word.

He held the phone and waited until there was a continuous "beep" sound, and he was reluctant to hang up.

He really wanted to answer him, really wanted to respond to him.

Yi Qing, it's me, it's me, Long Tianyu.

But he couldn't, he could only cover his mouth tightly, listening to the familiar voice gradually turning into a continuous blind tone, his eyes were red.

The author has something to say: I was a little emotional yesterday, so I won’t talk about this kind of personal matter in the future, and everyone will happily read the article together