Girlfriend addicted to unrequited love (gl)

So she said, habit is the most important thing.

Thanks to this damn habit, by the time she realized it, she was already holding two servings of lo mei in her hand.

"What am I doing, I don't like eating chicken hearts, the people who like to eat this are---"

Yan Ziqiao stopped and shook his head vigorously.

See, it is also out of habit that I often think of that person's name unconsciously.

Some people say that it takes 21 days to form a new habit, and it takes longer to break a habit. If this is the case, it is normal that you are not used to your absence for the time being, right?

"Ah Qiao, you are going to buy dinner late today."

Landlord Wang was washing the floor with a hose on the first floor of the apartment. He greeted Yan Ziqiao who came back with a lo-mei.

"Because my tutor's student is going to have a mock exam next week, so I helped him with an extra ten minutes."

"That's right."

Landlord Wang smiled and continued to use a brush to clean the stains on the floor.Yan Ziqiao glanced at the lo-mei in his hand: "Does the landlord want chicken hearts?"

"Chicken heart?" Landlord Wang stopped what he was doing.

"Yes, I can give you all if you want, because I don't like the taste of chicken hearts very much."

Landlord Wang felt strange: "Why do you buy chicken hearts if you don't like them?"

"...Well, I didn't buy it, maybe the clerk made a mistake."

Landlord Wang laughed loudly: "It's true, he's too nervous, thank you, I'll feed it to my two grandchildren."

"Uh-huh."

Yan Ziqiao breathed a sigh of relief.

It's so dangerous, I almost let the figure of "her" break into my mind again.

Just when she was rejoicing, the landlord's voice knocked her into the vortex again: "By the way, your long-haired girl friend, why haven't you seen her coming recently?"

Ah, why, it's obviously really close.

After finding an excuse to perfuse the landlord, she hurried back to the third floor and closed the door.

If you were still the original you who had no feelings for me, how good would it be?

Suppressing the sorrow in her heart, she swallowed the cold dinner whole, took out the course exercises that she had practiced halfway through, and started writing in the living room.

It was okay at first, but the closer it was to nine o'clock, the more she couldn't concentrate, and she couldn't help but glance at the phone every few seconds. As a result, the questions that are usually quite easy to answer, ten questions There are six questions wrong.

"Oh, what the hell am I—"

Nine o'clock arrived quickly, and after another, the phone didn't ring, and 'she' didn't call.

That's normal, isn't it?

Yan Ziqiao couldn't help sighing, packed up the exercises on the table, and decided to take a bath to wake himself up.Opening the drawer, her pajamas and pajamas, and... a few clothes of 'her' were placed on the bottom of the closet.

"It's not good to throw away other people's things without permission, so how should I return it? It's absolutely impossible in person, she won't want to see me, right? Do I need to send it? I want to send it to the dormitory. I remember to write the address... "

She murmured, reaching out to caress the water-blue shirt, the texture of the rayon material was very smooth, reminiscent of the long black hair of the owner of the dress...

Recalling that moonlit night, when she heard Jiang Yujie's confession with her own ears, her heart was really broken. Even before that, she had vaguely felt the other party's change from Jiang Yujie's attitude towards herself. But she still preferred to pretend not to know, pretending that all this was her own illusion, until finally when Jiang Yujie wanted to confess to herself, she still tried to stop him, just because she didn't want to wake up from the dream.

Jiang Yujie is very gentle, she has always believed in this point, but those good people she thought were gentle in the past betrayed her trust one by one because of that crazy liking.

That being the case, how can I believe that after Jiang Yujie has a liking, she will still be that gentle her?

Yan Ziqiao couldn't be sure of this, so she would rather separate before everything changed, and let everything end at the most beautiful moment. Then, at least, in her memory, Jiang Yujie would still be the most beautiful existence.

She no longer has the courage to bear the next disappointment.

Yan Ziqiao withdrew her hand, took out her pajamas, and closed the cabinet door forcefully as if she wanted to strengthen her determination, and almost at the same time, the mobile phone she left on the living room table rang.

She hurried out of the room and picked up her phone.

"It turned out to be Dai Shua."

The friend on the other end of the phone replied: "Why do I feel that you are slightly disappointed when you hear that it is me?"

"That's not the case, do you have anything to do with me?" Yan Ziqiao felt a little funny.

She, disappointed?How can it be.

"That is, didn't we originally plan to celebrate Ye Dongming's birthday the night after tomorrow?"

"Yeah, yes, haven't you already made reservations for the restaurants?"

"Well, it seems that something happened in the restaurant. We can't celebrate Dong Ming's birthday there as scheduled." Weng Daishu's tone seemed a little annoyed.

"Then what should we do? Do we want to change the location?"

"About this, we plan to celebrate him in a different way tonight. We will have a barbecue downstairs at Shanmei's house. Do you want to come?"

"Tonight? So temporary?" Yan Ziqiao stared at his watch, it was [-]:[-].

"Yeah, why don't you come? We've bought all the equipment, and we'll wait for you to come."

Yan Ziqiao closed her eyes. Normally, she would definitely not want to go out at such a late invitation, but after all, it was a friend's annual birthday, and it seemed unreasonable not to go, so she agreed without thinking too long A: "Okay."

After the call was over, Yan Ziqiao returned to the room with her mobile phone. The cold autumn night covered her empty room with a layer of bleakness that was hard to ignore. , still glowing with a bright yellow color, no amount of loneliness can make it dim.

She felt a pain in her heart.

Whenever I feel lonely, whenever I can't help but think of you, I always look at it quietly alone, and weep at our memories.

Whether I love the you in my imagination or the real you, even I don't know.The you I see in my eyes is the most perfect you. Because you are too perfect, I am even more afraid that my imagination of you will be disillusioned with your changes.

As long as we are separated from you, there is no need to be afraid of your change, because I don't want to accept 'you who like me' at all.

My thoughts are so selfish, selfish and disgusting, I don't deserve your love, and I don't have the qualifications to like you, I shouldn't have confessed to you from the beginning, if I didn't do that at that time, you Surely you won't be hurt because of me like now, right?

To continue is just to torture each other in vain, separation is the best choice.

She withdrew her gaze from the note paper: "Yeah, this is the best ending for us, but why..."

You are always entrenched in my mind and refuse to leave?

After spending a little time sorting out the messy thoughts, Yan Ziqiao picked up the key and arrived at Huang Shanmei's home in Tutiancuo in just 10 minutes. Shanmei, Jiang Yanyu, and Lai Wenhong were also there, sitting around the stove each holding a tong.

Maybe it’s because activities such as barbecue are very youthful for college students, that’s why they held a barbecue by the river for the freshmen of the Department of Chemistry not long ago, and now they choose the same way to celebrate their friends’ birthdays.

"Welcome! Want to play with this?"

Weng Daishu smiled when she saw her, and stuffed a big plastic bag into her hand, Yan Ziqiao recognized it as a fairy stick worth ten yuan and ten sticks in the night market: "I don't need this thing anymore, I'm a little afraid of it. "

"Are you afraid of fire?" Huang Shanmei watched Yan Ziqiao return the fairy wand to Weng Daishu, then walked over, pulled a small folding chair beside her and sat down.

Yan Ziqiao pulled her ponytail up a little bit: "I'm not afraid of fire like a gas stove, but I don't like the feeling of sparks erupting like fairy wands. Even if it's just sporadic sparks, it will still hurt when it is sprayed." .”

Although she said it as if she had experienced it herself, in fact, she had only seen the fairy sticks in the video. Of course, Yan Huiling couldn't be the kind of girl on TV who would hold her daughter's hand and play fairy sticks by the river bank Mom, in fact, except for the out-of-school trips of junior high school and elementary school, the only places she and Yan Huiling have been to are all kinds of expensive and boring restaurants.

After listening, Huang Shanmei got up immediately and expressed that she wanted to change seats with Yan Ziqiao. She explained to Yan Ziqiao in this way: "Your seat is too close to the stove. Since you are afraid of fire, you will be nervous sitting there? After all, it is made of charcoal. It's not as easy to control a fire as a gas stove."

After Huang Shanmei finished speaking, she moved herself to a folding chair closer to the stove, and turned around to tell Ye Dongming and Jiang Yuyu, who had already grabbed the fairy wand, not to use it near Yan Ziqiao.

Looking at Huang Shanmei's series of actions, rather than being moved, Yan Ziqiao's heart was full of doubts. Before her brain had time to think, she couldn't help asking: " Sunmi, do you still like me?"

It wasn't until she said the words that she realized how abrupt and rude the question was.Sure enough, after hearing her words, Huang Sunmi's smile immediately became stiff.

"Ah, I'm so hug--"

"It's okay, this question is fine." Huang Shanmei interrupted Yan Ziqiao's apology—even though her expression was still full of embarrassment, after confirming that the others were not listening, she continued, "Ask me Do I still like you? Isn't this natural? I can't easily transfer my feelings for you. "

"Then, since you like me, why are you being so nice to me?"

Yan Ziqiao knew that this question was even more rude than her last question, but she was too eager to know the answer.

Unlike Jiang Yujie, Huang Shanmei is naturally unaware of Yan Ziqiao's unrequited love. Regarding Yan Ziqiao's question, she is confused: "I don't understand what you mean. If you like someone, you should treat her well, right Is she gentle?"

"But, don't many people in this world hurt the people they like? Social news also often reports all kinds of people who stalk, imprison, and even kill the people they like."

"Well, well... Indeed, there are such people, but, can the love of those people really be called 'love'?" Huang Shanmei stared seriously at Yan Ziqiao's face full of confusion, "I think True liking is to hope that the other person can be happy. People who will hurt others because of 'like', their feelings are not love at all, at best it is a twisted and pathological attachment, nothing more."

Speaking of this, Huang Shanmei looked away a little embarrassed: "You know what? The thing I regret the most is confessing to you. I know that you had a girlfriend at that time. My confession will definitely cause you embarrassment. I don't I don't want to make you feel sad, but I still made such a decision under the impulsive drive, people like me are really selfish."

"No, I know Sunmi is gentle, so---"

In the middle of Yan Ziqiao's speech, she suddenly felt a 'deng' in her heart, and something she had never seen clearly seemed to become clearer.

After Huang Sunmi confessed to herself, the reason why she can continue to be friends with the other party is because she knows that Huang Sunmi is a gentle girl, and Huang Sunmi will never hurt herself like Yang Zongru in the past.

But why can't she continue to get along with Jiang Yujie?

Is it because Jiang Yujie's gentleness is not as good as Huang Sunmei's?

No, it's not like that.

She clearly knows Jiang Yujie's gentleness better than anyone else. She always said that she couldn't believe that Jiang Yujie who had "liked" would still be that gentle Jiang Yujie.

Then why is she willing to believe in Huang Sunmi, but unwilling to try to believe in Jiang Yujie who has dedicated more tenderness to her?

At this moment, every bit of getting along with Jiang Yujie poured into her heart, showing in front of her eyes like a marquee, and finally all intertwined into a thick pile of emotions that cannot be written with a pen.

Suddenly, everything she had been struggling with all this time unraveled.

A line of tears sneaked away from the corner of her eyes before she realized it. Fortunately, Huang Sunmei was called by Weng Daishu to help at this moment. She didn't notice her appearance at the moment, so she quickly wiped away the tears quietly.

So it was so, so it was so, she finally understood that she already knew the answer to this question whether she would like to have Jiang Yujie's company in the future journey.