a quarter of his

- Gigi, are you busy?

Ying Zhe was distracted, but was drawn back by a new message, pursed his lower lip, and started typing.

-Yeah, it's my birthday tonight, I'm going out for dinner.

-Today is your birthday?Happy birthday, why didn't you tell brother in advance, and order a cake or something for you.

He chatted with someone he met on blued a long time ago. Ying Zhe absently replied "Thank you" and switched back to the message interface.

Ever since he just hung up the phone, he felt an inexplicable sense of uneasiness, and always felt that something was wrong with Lin Jingfan's tone.

are you angry?Ying Zhe was a little puzzled.

He reviewed the relationship between the two of them in the past few days. Recently, because Lin Jingfan was busy with his projects, the two of them basically didn't interact much, and after much deliberation, it was only about picking up the courier.

"I can be angry because of this," Ying Zhe muttered impatiently.

Can't help but look at the phone, there is still half an hour to six o'clock.

There was a strong wind blowing outside the balcony, and the window was covered with dark clouds, gloomy.

Ying Zhe sighed, typed "I have something to do, let's not chat" in the chat box, resigned to fate, put a backpack on her shoulders, got up and went out.

There was a strong wind outside the house, and Ying Zhe was almost blown back as soon as he went out. Seeing that the weather was going to rain at any time, he went back to the house and took an umbrella.

Sure enough, as soon as he walked downstairs to the dormitory, sporadic raindrops fell.

There are more than a dozen dormitory buildings in Mingde Building, and the place to pick up the courier is far away. Ying Zhe was afraid that he would not be able to make it to six o'clock, so he chose to ride a bicycle.

Unexpectedly, just halfway through the ride, a white light of lightning flashed across, followed by huge raindrops crackling down, turning into a torrential rain in an instant.

Ying Zhe scolded Gou Cao, hurriedly held up the umbrella, and when he looked up, he seemed to see a familiar figure passing by him out of the corner of his eye.

Lin Jingfan?

He turned his head abruptly, only to see a black spot without an umbrella gradually shrinking in the white rain and fog.

He shook his head mockingly, thinking that he was thinking too much.That young man should be throwing a temper tantrum while working on papers in the library at the moment. Thinking of this, he gritted his teeth and accelerated the speed of the car.

It happened to be the last 5 minutes left when we arrived, and there was no one on the overhead floor. The brother on duty had packed up his things and was about to call it a day. Ying Zhe hurried forward and begged his brother to wait.

"Are you in such a hurry to pick up the courier in such heavy rain?"

The senior brother is quite nice, and even helped him find it together. Ying Zhe was worried, and smiled and said, "Well, the partner is losing his temper."

The senior brother nodded understandingly, and said: "My girlfriend is the same. If you reply too late, you will be scolded. If you reply too soon, you will suspect that I am chatting with others. It is absolutely wrong to do anything. Let alone take a courier... ...Hey, is this it?"

The senior brother picked up a package, and Ying Zhe saw that it was Lin Jingfan's phone number.

"That's it," he said with a sigh of relief, "Thank you, brother."

"No need", the senior brother took out the instrument and scanned it, and said, "Girls are like this, just go back and coax them."

"Yeah," Ying Zhe was holding the courier, thinking of the conflict between the two last time, his brows and eyes relaxed, and he pursed his lips and said, "He's quite easy to coax."

The two bid farewell, and the senior took an umbrella and left.

Ying Zhe sat on the duty chair and wanted to call Lin Jingfan before leaving.There are too many people in the dormitory, and it is inconvenient to say a lot of things, and it happens to be quiet here.

He took out his phone and clicked on the lock screen.

The home page prompts Lin Jingfan to send three messages from blued.

Ying Zhe stopped breathing almost instantly.

Lin Jingfan found out that he was chatting with blued?

Ying Zhe panicked all of a sudden, feeling guilty of being caught on the spot for doing something bad.

He stared at the few lines of message prompts for a long time, and finally mustered up the courage to go all out and click on it.

-Suddenly feel a little tired, so I won't go to the evening date.

- (Video taken by Faceu)

-Happy birthday to you, Gigi.

The tone of each of the three messages was more normal than the other, but Ying Zhe inexplicably felt chills all over his body.

He watched the video and seemed to realize something after a while.

His fingers paused briefly on the screen, and then he clicked open tremblingly.

It was pitch black for the first few seconds, then there was a rustling sound, and Lin Jingfan's bright smile appeared.

"Ahem, um, Gigi, happy birthday. When you saw this video, we should have finished our date. Were you moved by my surprise and cried?"

The weight of the first sentence alone made him almost out of breath, and Ying Zhe, trembling with breathing, quietly looked at the person in the picture.

The camera shakes a little, and Ying Zhe notices that there is a pitch-black barbed wire fence behind him. It should be recorded while sitting on the horizontal bar in the small playground.

As if he was not used to talking to the camera, Lin Jingfan looked a little embarrassed, coughed twice, and then showed a mean smile.

"Do you still think that I don't know your birthday at all?" He looked at Ying Zhe outside the camera with a mischievous expression, and said with a wicked smile, "Are you surprised or surprised?"

"Don't be stubborn, I know you must be very moved, but don't worry, there will be more moving next." He looked to both sides unnaturally, as if to see if anyone noticed him, and then looked back at Lens, said solemnly:

"Student Ying Zhe, you also know that I never sing. This time, I learned a special song for your birthday. Don't you think it's ugly."

He cleared his throat and said, "Then I'll start now..."

"On the banks of the Seine, the coffee on the left bank, I have a cup in my hand, taste your beauty, the mouth that leaves a lip print"

Ying Zhe listened to the a cappella without accompaniment for a long time before realizing that he was singing "Confession Balloon".

"...You said that you are a little hard to chase, and you want me to retreat. You don't need to choose the most expensive gift, just the fallen leaves of the Champs."

Lin Jingfan's voice was clear and clear, trembling due to nervousness, Ying Zhe's eyes filled with tears, and he sang together.

"...oh make a romantic date, not afraid to screw it up, have you and have the world"

The date you planned was really romantic, but I'm sorry I messed up everything.

"...Darling, falling in love with you, from that day on, sweet and easy."

Raindrops crackled down from the zenith, splashing white flowers on the ground.In the ancient silence, Lin Jingfan's voice is green and gentle, Ying Zhe's voice is deep and trembling, the two voices are intertwined and lingering, like a sad and sweet love song.

"...My dear, don't be willful, your eyes are saying I am willing."

At the end of the last sentence, a tear flowed over the corner of Ying Zhe's eyes.

"It's over." On the screen, Lin Jingfan breathed a sigh of relief, shook his head and said, "How about it, it's not bad."

Ying Zhe panted heavily, guilt and self-blame almost overwhelmed him.

Lin Jingfan's voice was full of sunshine, "Jiji, this is our first birthday together, I hope we will celebrate our birthday together every year in the future."

"I love you, good night."

The screen freezes.

"I love you too," Ying Zhe rested his forehead on the table and muttered.

He rubbed his face vigorously, and unwrapped his legs with trembling fingers.

When he saw what was inside, he fell silent.

It was a sneaker he had mentioned a long time ago, with a four-figure figure. Even though he was used to buying famous brands, he still felt a little heartbroken, so he had nothing to do but brush up pictures to pass the dry addiction.

Unexpectedly, Lin Jingfan actually bought it, and Ying Zhe burst into tears almost instantly.

He knows how much money Lin Jingfan has. After buying these shoes, he will be nervous about eating for the next month.

And he, when he was preparing for a surprise, chatted with others, and he didn't even want to pick up a courier.

Ying Zhe only felt wrapped in overwhelming guilt, he couldn't imagine Lin Jingfan's current mood, he hurriedly took out his mobile phone and dialed Lin Jingfan's number.

The indifferent mechanical female voice reminded him over and over again that the phone on the other side was turned off, but he dialed over and over again as if he couldn't hear it.

The dark clouds overwhelmed the top, the sky and the earth were gloomy, and the strong wind and heavy rain came, as if the end of the world had come.

When Lin Jingfan woke up, he only felt a splitting headache, it was pitch black outside the window, and his roommates were snoring one after another.

He took out his phone, pressed the power button, and checked the time.

Five in the morning.

Dozens of missed calls popped up, all of which were from Ying Zhe.

-Baby, I saw the video, I like the birthday present very much.

- I'm sorry, I didn't realize you were trying to surprise me, I messed up everything you had prepared.I know it's useless to say sorry now, but I'm really sorry.

- I'm really worried about you, please take care of me, please.

-I went to your dormitory, and my roommate said you were sleeping in the rain.I know you've been exhausted recently, so take a good rest and reply me when you wake up?

- I love you, I really love you.

Lin Jingfan looked at these few messages calmly, the burning feeling of a few hours ago was gone, followed by deep exhaustion.

Thinking back a few hours ago, he sent those few messages to Ying Zhe almost vindictively, and he also knew that Ying Zhe would be moved and feel guilty.

Although this method of killing eight hundred enemies and harming one thousand is relieved, the most fundamental problem between the two of them is still unresolved.

The case of picking up the courier was just a joke, what Lin Jingfan really cared about was Ying Zhe's dishonesty, but his personality just couldn't accept this kind of dishonesty.

Lin Jingfan knew very well that only by talking about this issue openly and honestly could they truly reconcile without any grievances.Otherwise, all the whitewashing and sliming will only make the two people more and more eccentric, and in the end this love will only be filled with more and more unbearable lies and deceit.

"Invisible Sails": Gigi, let's talk.

Ying Zhe didn't reply, he should be sleeping.

Lin Jingfan slept for more than ten hours, and now he doesn't feel sleepy at all.

He stared at the ceiling and meditated for a long time, and finally recovered from his depressed mood.

Isn't love all sweet, he comforted himself, it always needs to be adjusted.

Lin Jingfan was quite optimistic, he could feel that Ying Zhe cared about him, and he never thought of giving up or shrinking back.

As long as we are still in love, any problem can be solved.

The phone vibrated, and Ying Zhe replied the message.

"Ying Zhe": Okay, now?

"Invisible Sail": After class, go to the small playground to talk at night.

"Ying Zhe": Go talk to Ximen, I'll reserve a room now.

"Invisible Sails": Oh, sorry, I'm not in the mood for that today.

"Ying Zhe": You know that's not what I mean, I just want a place to have a good talk with you.

"Invisible Sail": Afraid that we will be ashamed to quarrel in the playground?

"Ying Zhe": No, but the small playground is a public place after all.

"Invisible Sail": I'm still afraid of being seen.

Ying Zhe didn't insist anymore, and after a long time, he replied, "Okay, I'll listen to you."

Lin Jingfan turned off his mobile phone and stared blankly for a while, the alarm clock rang, and the other three in the dormitory woke up.

Zhou Xiang: "What the hell, you have to go to class after three days of modeling. It's better not to have a holiday."

Xu Zequn: "Yeah, luckily it's an advanced math class, so I can paddle."

Zhang Zhao glanced at Lin Jingfan, and suddenly said, "Fan boy, why do you look so bad?"

"Is there?" Lin Jingfan sneezed, looked in the mirror, his face was indeed a little pale, "I guess you caught a cold yesterday from the rain."

"Just let you take a hot bath last night," Zhou Xiang said, "As a result, you were muddled and didn't make sense of what you said."

"Senior brother Liu Dong and his team are so scary?" Zhang Zhao said, "Writing a thesis will exhaust us like this."

"I have Sanjiu cold spirit here." Xu Zequn took out a few packs of green granules from the drawer and threw them to him, "Drink some precautions first, this is a terrible weather."

"It's been a long time since there was such a heavy rain in City C," Zhou Xiang said, "The last time it was so heavy was when I was in high school..."

Surrounded by them, Lin Jingfan walked towards the teaching building, feeling that the roommates were as warm as family members.

The sky was gloomy, and there were still a few raindrops falling, which made people feel unmotivated.

Lin Jingfan finished the day's class calmly, opened Ying Zhe's WeChat several times habitually, but didn't know what to say.

Ying Zhe also remained silent.

Without chatting, he suddenly realized that the day was so long.

At two o'clock in the afternoon, the rain stopped and the sun broke through the thick clouds.

"Ying Zhe": What time will you meet?

"Invisible Sails": It's nine o'clock.

"Ying Zhe": Good.

After a rain, the playground was wet and almost deserted.When Lin Jingfan walked into the playground, he saw Ying Zhe had already arrived from a distance.

He is still standing under the familiar horizontal bar, tall and straight, handsome.

Lin Jingfan approached and saw that he was holding two bottles of pulsation and a row of medicines in his hands.

I haven't seen him for a few days, he looks a lot haggard, and the stubble has grown out.

Lin Jingfan was not much better than him, even after drinking the Jiujiu cold spirit given by Xu Zequn, he still had a glorious cold when the rain stopped in the afternoon.

The two looked at each other silently for a long time.

Ying Zhe's eyes were complicated, filled with guilt, distress and guilt.

"You've lost weight", he handed the pulse in his hand to Lin Jingfan, and said distressedly.

"You too", Lin Jingfan said, only after he finished speaking did he realize that his voice was already too hoarse.

"I heard from your roommate that you were caught in the rain yesterday." Ying Zhe handed over the medicine in his hand again.

Lin Jingfan took a look and found that it was a row of lotus Qingwen capsules.

Recalling that a long time ago when Ying Zhe was not known to be "Jiji", he also gave him medicine, and I can't help but sigh that fate is really a reincarnation.

Ying Zhe seemed to know what he was thinking, and said, "I've finished eating what you gave me earlier, and I bought this at the pharmacy."

Lin Jingfan raised his eyes to look at him, and Ying Zhe panicked, "I'm sorry, I didn't say this to impress you."

"I didn't think so," Lin Jingfan looked at him amusedly.

"I'm sorry," Ying Zhe looked at him seriously, "Although I've already said it once on WeChat, I still have to say, I'm really sorry."

"I also have something wrong," Lin Jingfan said, "I'm too tempered, no matter what conflicts I have, I should talk about it, and I shouldn't stay overnight."

"No, it's my problem," Ying Zhe said bitterly, "You put so much effort into preparing my birthday present, but I don't even want to pick up a courier for you. I really..."

"Ying Zhe", Lin Jingfan interrupted him, straight to the point, "When I called you yesterday, what were you doing?"

The two stood facing each other beside the horizontal bar, Lin Jingfan's eyes were clear and honest, just like the first day they came to the small playground.

Ying Zhe still remembered that night, he was moved by the openness in his eyes.

With eyes like these, he couldn't lie anymore.

"I am chatting with someone on blued."

As if a heavy stone fell to the ground, Lin Jingfan actually felt solid.

"Why did you lie to me?" Thinking of the feeling of being betrayed by the whole world yesterday, Lin Jingfan still felt a dull pain in his heart, "I have never restricted you from interacting with others."

"Because..." Ying Zhe turned around and leaned on the horizontal bar, as if he was a little hard to say, "He was the first person I met in blued, before the two of us, before, um..."

"Did you do it?"

"No," Ying Zhe said immediately, "I really don't have this, but it's... talked about, he taught me a lot, I'm afraid you will be very happy when you find out."

"Aside from him, is there anyone else?" Lin Jingfan heard himself asking softly.

"Three or four." Ying Zhe looked at him nervously, "But I don't have any feelings for them. What I love is you. I just chat occasionally. I'm afraid you won't mind."

Having reached this point, Ying Zhe simply broke the jar.

"I know you don't like me chatting with people on blued. It's true that I haven't made good friends on it. The gay circle is basically like this. Brother and younger brother are sticky, but... I just can't help it."

"I have been posting for three years, and I have also used blued for more than two years. I have become a habit of opening it every day to find someone to chat with..."

Ying Zhe entered this circle too early, and had already seen all kinds of absurdities in this circle when he was not deeply involved in the world.

Once upon a time, he was as sincere and candid as Lin Jingfan is now, but he has experienced too many deceptions, and his innocent heart has long been smoothed out, and he has gradually learned to behave and adapt to the ecological environment of this circle.

Don't ask for forever, just ask for a moment of greed and joy.

This is pretty much the creed of the entire gay scene.

So Ying Zhe learned to be smooth-tongued, and skillfully walk back and forth between the truth and the fake.

Don't move the truth and don't be sad.

He was used to teasing him without pain, and then retreated irresponsibly.

Until he met Lin Jingfan.

He is not a perfect person, but he is the kind of person who will share and give without reservation as long as he recognizes a person or a thing.

His frankness and sincerity are like a mirror, reflecting Ying Zhe's cowardice deeply buried in his heart.

"That's the kind of person I am," Ying Zhe said in the end, "I can't help it."

"I don't mind if you have gay friends," Lin Jingfan said seriously, "But you shouldn't lie to me, because I trust you without reservation."

"I will never lie to you, I have always regarded you as the closest and most trusted person."

"I'm sorry." Ying Zhe's eyes were full of guilt, "I always wanted to treat you well. During the time we were together, I hoped to leave you with a good memory, but I still messed up everything. "

Lin Jingfan sensitively grasped a gap in his words, "What do you mean, during the time we were together, you hope to leave me with a good memory?"

"What do you mean, you don't believe that we will always be together?" Lin Jingfan turned to look at him in a daze.

Ying Zhe also seemed a little dazed: "It will always end, won't it? As you said, feelings belong to feelings, and life belongs to life."

"I said that, wait a minute", Lin Jingfan was a little dazed for a while, he tried his best to recall the context in which he said this sentence, but he couldn't remember it.

Ying Zhe looked at him quietly, with sadness flowing in his eyes.

"We can't go on like this forever. We will always return to our family after graduation..."

In the blink of an eye, Lin Jingfan seemed to have grasped a certain point, and at that moment he was overwhelmed by disbelief, making him tremble uncontrollably.

"You mean, you will get married in the future?"

Lin Jingfan looked at him as if he didn't recognize him.

...

The author has something to say: woo woo woo

I still love you today~