My Panda Cohabitant

Ji Shang couldn't understand these guys.

If you say they are savages who don’t understand civilization, they have a sound organization, and they know how to “send to the Public Security Bureau through pyramid schemes”; Fiancee", can you still be a little rational?He thought about it for a long time, and felt that these guys were a bit like those who came out of the deep mountains and old forests, stepping into modernization in one step. Although they were gradually inspired by "civilization", their behavior style still clearly left traces of beasts, but they were indeed making progress.

For example, Xiaoyao and the others actually sold Amway at the gate of the University City at the beginning, how stupid this was, but then they were very clever and switched to selling compressed towels.

"Can you kill people casually?" Ji Shang tried his best to ask in a calm tone. During this time, his patience has been greatly exercised, "Kill monsters or kill people."

"It's a ghost." Liu Jian corrected it again and said, "Of course not. Killing the same kind requires a corresponding occupation, and killing people requires a license."

Fuck, there's a license to kill?

"Who will the license to kill be issued to?"

Several monsters and ghosts looked at each other, and they all showed thoughtful expressions.

"It seems to be very powerful, right?" Xiao Yao said first.

"I heard that he has been in the human world for many years." Liu Zou became more and more proficient in using the Shandong-style Beijing accent, "I must be very familiar with the affairs of the human world."

"It seems to be very big." The chili monster named Xiaolu said seriously, "It is said that it has a scary face."

Liu Biao kept listening, and at this moment, he patted the table and came to a conclusion: "I want it! It's very big, with a scary face, who has been in the world for many years, is very sensible, and is very powerful!"

After listening to it, Ji Shang confirmed that the so-called "license to kill" should be just a legend, and immediately said: "Don't harass that fiancée!"

There was a sound of wailing at the dinner table, and the monsters and ghosts complained one after another, and Liu Zou also said in great disappointment: "Then what should I do?"

Ji Shang couldn't see the panda's downcast look, and tried to persuade him for a long time.It's okay if you don't want to be persuaded, but once persuaded, Liu Zou lowered his head, turned around and walked into the bedroom with a whimper, and went to mend the hole in the floor again in a ball.

"I have a solution!" The chili girl who had been silent until now finally said, "Use administrative means!"

This word is new, and the monsters and ghosts whispered to each other, with expressions of "this plan is very good", Ji Shang quietly approached Liu Yan and asked softly, "What do you mean by administrative means?"

With an unfathomable expression on Liu Bian's face, he said, "You will know tomorrow."

"I have to go to work tomorrow, so I can't accompany you."

Without even thinking about it, Liu Yan said, "Oh, how about changing it to the evening, because those who work at night are dead."

Ji Shang seriously considered his heart's ability to bear it, and said, "Let's change it to the weekend."

"Okay." Liu Yan said.

Throughout the week, Ji Shang was thinking about the matter of this administrative agency. Although he had talked with his friend several times, he still couldn't figure it out after the discussion.He guessed that it was probably the administrative organization of human beings, but judging from the behavior style of these people, this administrative method may not be too normal, otherwise they would not agree with it as soon as they said it.

During this period, the young couple downstairs came to visit and asked what material Ji Shang used to fill the floor, why sometimes it was not there, and often opened his eyes in the middle of the night and could still see the material shrinking, expanding, wriggling, and fluff floating from time to time Come down, it's very infiltrating.

Ji Shang laughed dryly and used the "big carpet" to fool him, and repeatedly promised to use "normal materials" to make up for it after a while.It's a pity that Liu Zou suddenly became very fond of this place, and would come here at night, shrink into the cave, not too big or too small, just to block it, and go back at dawn.Ji Shang felt that Bingbing was definitely a very unqualified breeder. He didn’t even notice that the panda disappeared at night. The panda channel in the city also received numerous complaints recently, saying that the panda was not in the camera at night, and asked to increase the scope of the camera.

Ji Shang asked Liu Wei: "What if a 360-degree camera with no dead angles is installed?"

Liu Zou said calmly, "Be a fake panda."

Ji Shang asked curiously, "What do you use?"

Liu Wei spit out two words very simply: "Break|poop."

"..."

The weekend finally came, and Ji Shang happily followed Liu Yan to do the "administrative means". His companions included Liu Zou and Xiao Yao. As for how the "zoo national treasure" came out in broad daylight, it is said that he used "something He made a stand-in and put it in the zoo, and when he thought that what the men, women and children who went to the zoo today enthusiastically watched was "something", his expression became subtle.

Ji Shang's car just fits four people, got into the driver's seat and fastened his seat belt, he asked, "Where are you going?"

"Gaoloumen Community Office."

"Community service center?" Ji Shang let go of the hand switch, and said with a relaxed face, "Isn't that the place of Director Wu Se?"

"Yeah, I'm going to be named with him for the time being." Liu Yan said, "I'll ask him to handle this matter."

Ji Merchant was not far away, and soon arrived at the destination: a very ordinary street.Under the guidance of Liu Jian, the car turned around and turned to the end of a dead-end alley. All you could see were ordinary buildings, with shops below and residents above, and the sign was very naturally "Gaoloumen Community Service Center".

"It looks very ordinary." Ji Shang stood at the door looking up for a few seconds, and said, "Humans come here too."

"This one is specially used for business." Liu Jie explained, "Look at the lower right corner."

Ji Shang squinted his short-sighted eyes, and after looking at it for a while, he realized that there were four small characters in the lower right corner: Immortal Branch.After observing for a while, he found nothing unusual, but when he was about to take a step, he heard a loud noise, and a big hole exploded from the third floor of the whole building. Then, they cursed at each other.

"The cable solution in the demon area has not been laid yet! Do you know how many demons have come to complain? Others are not bad for the demon area, but your telecommunications department eats shit!? Do you have the spirit of service!?"

The man was wearing a business suit, with his sleeves ripped off, his arms bare, and he spoke Cantonese Mandarin.

"Ugh! Do you know that the price of cable spirits has increased recently? It will take a long time to make a report! What did you say at the last meeting of the municipal committee? To build a conservation-oriented society, those stinky monsters often eat cable spirits on the phone. Damn! If you have the ability to call with a human phone!"

The other man was dressed in black, with a straight suit and a thin figure. His unorthodox hairstyle remained motionless in the strong wind, with a cigarette in his hand.

"If a human being can make phone calls to Xianting, I want you to be a plum!" The Guangdong man shouted angrily, "Don't let our letter|visiting sister demon wipe your ass if you can't handle it!"

"Ugh! Seven points, let's fight!"

"Crazy line, fight to fight! ￥#@#..."

Ji Shang could no longer understand the words that followed, yelling and gesticulating in Cantonese and Henan dialect, and five minutes passed without any physical contact. Instead, one smashed the balcony and the other trampled on the community service sign.

Ji Shang observed for a moment, then said hesitantly, "Fighting is not allowed here?"

"Brother Ji is really smart!" Xiaoyao flattered with enthusiasm and let nature take its course, "Those who can destroy public property are not allowed to beat them alive. Everyone is very good. It's not good to beat them to death. Anyway, after the public property is destroyed, it will stop." .”

"Oh." Ji Shang didn't bother to complain about this rule, so he thought about it and asked, "The department that speaks Henan dialect is in charge of communications, and the one that speaks Cantonese is the Department of Complaints|Interview|Receives Complaints?"

"Correct."

"Do you use different communication cables for different races?"

"No, it's the same, but demons like to eat cable spirits very much. Often the telecommunications department just lays the front foot, and they can't help eating the back foot." Xiaoyao said enviously, "We have a lot of places to contact. Cable spirits can adapt to different places, which is a necessity. The largest storage of cable spirits is in Australia, where many goblins and spirits don’t have to work, just lie on the cable spirits and spend money, and they are all local tyrants.”

"..."

Ji Shang wanted to say something else, but Liu Jie suddenly grabbed his hand and said, "They're going over there, fast forward!"

The four of them ran into the building in a row through the crackling building debris. Ji Shang saw many rooms and low counters, which were no different from ordinary government offices, except for the "people".

"Master Zhang Jing, you can't use illusions at home. According to the Civil Construction Law, using illusions to expand a house is considered an illegal construction. Not only will it be demolished, but you will also be fined."

"Grandma is a bear, since ancient times..."

"That's the rule now!"

"Grandma is a bear! Forehead tube!"

The old man who was speaking trembled, and instantly turned into a pine tree in the sky. Several people in uniforms rushed up immediately, and the counter with the real estate sign was suddenly in chaos, and the branches danced wildly.

"Ugly girl, why doesn't my business license work anymore?"

"Brother Ugly, your time has expired and you need a monthly inspection."

"Why do other people have annual inspections and I have monthly inspections?"

"Because you sell medical equipment, which is a special industry."

"Since when is Dali Pill considered a medical device?"

"Just reclassified this year."

Ji Shang glared at the man and woman who were discussing harmoniously, and leaned into Xiao Yao's ear and said, "What's the custom of calling an ugly man an ugly woman?"

Xiao Yao glanced at it, and said: "Oh, they are ugly ghosts, the uglier they are, the more powerful they are, of course you have to say that."

Ji Shang felt that his brain was not enough, so he stopped looking around and followed Liu Jian silently.Soon, they passed the big hole that had just been punched out, passed by the Guangdong man and the Henan man who were still spitting, and went up to the fourth floor, and finally arrived at the director's office.

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The update time is finally normal today!