Gu Qingci

Although it is the twelfth lunar month, it is inevitable to feel a little hot after walking so far wrapped in such a large and thick robe.Wiping the sweat from my temples, just when I was at a loss, someone next to me suddenly touched me.

"Hey, King Zejun—I finally found you!" A court eunuch looked at me with bright eyes, grabbed my sleeve and walked forward, saying as he walked, "You just don't say anything!" It's gone, it's really easy to find for slaves! It's hard for you to come to the capital once, and you can't make mistakes at this time. After half a stick of incense, the emperor will go to the altar to worship. If you haven't arrived by then, it will be a serious crime of beheading , hurry up!"

The mask that Sha Yu made for me turned out to look like a county king?I followed him closely and walked unimpeded all the way. There were more and more guards on both sides, and I finally reached the guard of honor of the clan.

"Jun Wang, your seat is here." The eunuch pointed to the vacant space and motioned for me to stand over.The prince is in front, and the county king is in the back. My row is full of face-to-face sons.That's right, Liu Yao, the founding emperor of the country, made some heroes kings, and the fiefdoms were relatively small.Later, after two generations of suppression by Liu Pei and Liu Yueying, the fiefdoms of these kings with different surnames became more and more remote, and the real power that was already small was all emptied; To be a local emperor in a remote area, he doesn't have to worry about eating and drinking.Therefore, I have never met any of these people.

Two or three rows ahead is the position of the prince, and there are one or two familiar faces.But they don't recognize me now, don't worry.

The sound of rites and music on both sides became louder and louder, and under the report of the first-level supervisors, the ceremony of offering sacrifices to heaven finally began.I looked up.

It was incredible looking up - I actually saw the golden border of the emperor's driving.She is far away from me, I want to look up.Squinting your eyes, trying to see yourself more clearly.

That's how I met Liu Yueying.It's just that I can see her, but she can't see me.She seems to have lost some weight, and her loose dragon robe has also been altered, but she is still in good spirits.

She walked up the steps of the altar step by step, her steps were steady, unhurried, and her back was straight.This is her usual style, and nothing can beat this strength.Looking at her back silently, I now feel that another name for invincible is ruthless.If you are ruthless to everyone, you will have no weaknesses, and you will be naturally invincible and frightening.

It's time for her to kneel down and sacrifice to heaven.The officials knelt first, the clan followed, and the emperor knelt last.

At this time, Liu Yueying suddenly turned around, looking down from such a high altar, her sight was unobstructed.She seemed to be looking for something, and I quickly lowered my head in fright, never daring to lift it up again.

She won't find out, never...

After that, there are some things that follow the rules. I don't dare to look at her recklessly, and occasionally look at her once or twice with my peripheral vision; Talk about something intimately.

Such a complicated ritual of offering sacrifices took three full hours, and Liu Yueying was safe and sound.So actually, she's really fine—she's doing fine.It has nothing to do with her that those sad pictures can't be painted, so naturally there won't be any pain and depression afterwards.

What are you still struggling with? ——She is living so well, I should finally give up completely and completely.

I am relieved and can seriously live my life.

==

...is that really the case?

Sha Yu and I set off back to the high mountains on the border, and I didn't say a word along the way.Not knowing what to say, how to say, what to say.

I think the shiny candied gourds on the street are not sweet at all, the plump Dahongpao in the teahouse is not at all cold, even the sound of the suona has become dull and sluggish, and the meat buns in the morning have no fragrance, so they are only served The hot porridge is bitter and astringent.Sometimes looking at the trees on both sides, its bare branches can be seen for several sticks of incense.

So bare branches must be very cold in the cold wind, right?Is it snowing soon?

Originally, Sha Yu was still in a hurry, but she realized that something was wrong with me, so she slowed down.

"Si doll, why don't we walk and stroll all the way? My sister will take you to play!" Her red phoenix eyes narrowed together and raised, trying to make me feel happy.

I know she wants to make me happy, but I really don't have the strength to think about what kind of emotion "happiness" is and how to express it.The whole body is a little numb, and the reaction to everything around is delayed.All I could feel was her eyes curved and her mouth curved upwards.

"What's wrong with you, baby? Don't scare me!" She stretched out her hand and waved it in front of my eyes.

I felt a little dazzled, phantoms piled up layer by layer, and I simply closed my eyes: "It's okay, nothing happened."

In the world, how could there be such a cold and indifferent person like Liu Yueying?Why, she didn't feel any heartache at all?Is my devotion for so many years so humble and not worthy of her concern?

Also.

I almost forgot who I was.

Ben is an ant that can be crushed to death at any time, clumsy and dull, unable to find a way out in the dark, running around recklessly.Thanks to her appreciation and reuse, I am today. Everything I have is given by her—now it is just that she has taken it away again.

But I'm still so unhappy.Chasing her footsteps is the inertia of life, the instinct of life, suddenly want to let go, how to let go?How to put it?

All kinds of original things lay in the middle of the heart and blocked all the emotions. If they really want to clear up and eradicate them, the heart may no longer be able to beat.

Then let me swallow it silently, seal them up and fester alone.

==

A certain unnamed county town in Daiwan County.

"Li baby, look at this sword, the blade is really sharp! Would you like to try it?" Sha Yu waved the weapon just made from the blacksmith shop, and landed in front of me.

The trees in this county are very luxuriant, and folk rumors say that "the sun is covered by the sun and the moon is not covered", and the people mainly rely on wood for their livelihood.

The sun in winter is very high and far away, even if it hangs brightly in the sky, it doesn't feel any warmth.Sha Yu seems to be wearing light gauze all year round. When it is so cold and her breath is white, she only wears this decoration that has no ability to keep out the cold, swaying in front of me like a normal person.

He didn't refuse, took the sword obediently, and weighed it in his hand, neither light nor heavy, just right for me.

"The sword is a good sword, but I don't know martial arts." It's a pity.

"With me here, what are you afraid of!" Sha Yu raised her eyebrows, "My sister will teach you!"

The winter sun hit her face, which should have been cold, but a warm current gushed out of her heart for no reason.She is like a big tree to lean on - I want to cry again.

"Hey—why are you crying?" Seeing my red eyes, she panicked, "You really cry a lot more than before." Before?

Before I could ask, she quickly took out the handkerchief and put it in my hand, which was very warm.So doubts were swallowed into my stomach, she always said some very strange things recently.

"We are not in a hurry to go back. I will take you westward from Daiwan County, to Jiangnan County for a night tour of the Qinhuai River for ten miles, to Huaqiu County to skate on Caodong Lake and catch fish, and then to Gobi in Xianyang County to ride horses and watch the sunset. Okay?" Sha Yu looked at me very seriously: "If along the way we encounter some officials and gentry bullying others, or bandits robbing civilian women by force, we will act like a hero, kill one person in ten steps, and never stay behind for thousands of miles!"

Listening quietly to her telling me these things, her bright face is full of anticipation, longing, and nostalgia.

"What about Mu Diezhi?"

"She picked so many good medicines in Boundary Mountain, it's time to go to Xuanhu to help the world."

do you know?At a certain moment, when a person hears a certain sentence or a certain action spoken by someone else, he will somehow feel very familiar, but he can't remember where he has seen it.Maybe in a dream, maybe... many, many years ago.For a long time, the loess and mud have sunk, and the green lights have dried up.

When had I ever heard her say such things?Can not remember.It's just that this scene, this person, and what she said all seemed to have happened before.

"Sha Yu...can you tell me the truth." Because I haven't spoken much for a long time, my voice is very hoarse.

"What?" Her eyebrows moved up with two red phoenix eyes, looking a little silly.

"I will only ask you this question once, and you must think clearly before answering."

"it is good."

"Have we met before?" Otherwise, why are you so nice to me? ——Okay, it makes me feel ashamed that I have done nothing for you.

Sha Yu tilted his head again.The long hair is always tied with only a red headband, and many strands of hair that cannot be fixed are blown up by the howling cold wind in this wilderness, dancing in the wind.

I looked at her ostentatious face, under the disheveled hair, her eyes fixed on me.

After the wind blew for a long time, she said: "Well, we have met before. Not only have we met, but we are also very familiar."

No wonder I can't remember anything, but I feel inexplicably familiar—it must have happened in my previous life, it remained in my soul, and it disappeared after reincarnation.

"In the previous life, how did Yang Li die?" I was curious.

"Being plotted by the enemy, he died in a foreign country."

"Why did you leave your hometown? How did you get plotted against?"

She sighed, and said in a low voice: "You and Liu Yueying got angry, she exiled you out of the capital in a fit of anger, and then you were ambushed by Sha Jin's brother-in-law in Shangfang Valley..."

"I'm sorry, worry baby, I didn't expect it to become like this. I thought you could live happily and freely after leaving the capital. I didn't expect you to..." She was a little incoherent: "I can only do so much , The formation of changing fate against the sky is a big taboo, the universe has already opened, if I let you know my future again, I will be punished by heaven... So, I can only let you experience the pain of being burned by fire again, I don’t want to There is no choice. If you can get along well with Liu Yueying in this life, or become strangers, as long as you don't go deep into the Nanman in May, you will naturally not have these things. But destiny is hard to change, I'm sorry..."

"I know, don't be sad." It's not easy for her to keep my life that should have passed away: "No matter what you say, you are still a mortal person, not a god."

It's just... I have completely forgotten what she and I experienced in the previous life.Even if it's reincarnation, the person I'm obsessed with the most is the person who hurt me the most.