spare tire

On the day he was discharged from the hospital, Li Yuan didn't go home directly, but came to the cemetery in Aunt Lin Shulin's car.

He was holding a bouquet of flowers in his hand, it wasn't Qingming or Chinese New Year, it was very difficult to buy white chrysanthemums specially dedicated to the deceased at this time, Li Yuan searched many flower shops to buy such a bouquet.

Since he was born, he has come to this cemetery every year. When he was a child, he was held by his elder sister and followed his father, and came to sweep the grave of his "uncle" on Qingming Festival.Later, when he grew up, his father passed away, and the number of visits to the grave became twice a year, one on Qingming Festival, and the other on his father's memorial day.During that time, Brother Lin always accompanied the siblings. Although Li Yuan was deeply saddened by the loss of his loved ones, with their company, the road to the mausoleum was not so difficult.

Later, he was the only one left in the Li family.For five years, he came here rain or shine, cleaned up the dust from their gray-white mausoleum, and presented white chrysanthemums.

But he never knew that the "uncle" whom he had called for 23 years was actually his biological mother.

So my father never chose to visit the grave on my mother's memorial day, because it was also his birthday.

The parents in the photo seem to be quite different in age. The photo of Ning He is when he was in his prime, while Li Weiran's temples were tainted with wind and frost because he missed his lover too much. No one would guess if they saw such a photo. What a loving couple they used to be.

Li Yuan still remembers his father's crazy love for his mother in his diary, the kind of love that could even throw away the whole world was cut off abruptly by the cruel God, the most embarrassing thing in the world is not not getting love, but having Lost.

Maybe death is a relief for the father, he can finally unload the burden of raising children and go to another world to find the other half of his soul.

Li Yuan put Bai Ju on the altar, then knelt down and kowtowed three times to his parents.

"Dad, Mom, I'm here to see you..."

Mom, please forgive me for calling you uncle for 23 years...

Please also forgive me for taking your life away...

When I raised my head again, my eyes were already wet with tears, and the liquid that couldn't hold it fell drop by drop on the blue-gray tombstone, and dark tears bloomed.

Meeting each other but not knowing each other, this "mother" has been buried in his heart for many years, and now he can finally say it.

Seeing this scene, Mother Lin behind her couldn't help but shed tears.Witnessing the love between Li Weiran and Ning He, but not being able to see them grow old together, Ning He's appearance when he left suddenly appeared in front of his eyes. At that time, Li Weiran's mournful and desperate wailing words were still in his ears, making people cry as soon as he recalled it.

Although Li Xue was absurd, the Lin family loved Li Yuan from the bottom of their hearts.One is because he is very similar to the late Ning He. Seeing his smiling face always gives people the illusion that the other party is still alive.The second reason is that Li Weiran is too eccentric, even if he puts one-third of his paternal love for Li Xue on Li Yuan, this child will not worry about gains and losses like now, always longing for something but more afraid of losing it.

Li Yuan kowtowed his head again, this time, he didn't lift his head up again, but fell on the ground, letting the ground be wet with tears.There is no one to confide in the misery in his heart. Before the 23-year-old had time to enjoy the best years of his life, he was crushed by successive blows and couldn't straighten up.

Aunt Lin said that everything is fate, and Ning He's untimely death is something that God has ordered a long time ago, and no one can save it.What about the living?Whether what he endured was also destined, and if so, he wondered when it would all be over.

Parents died young, sister went astray, this seems to be a cursed family.But Li Yuan doesn't believe in fate, no matter how much he suffers, he firmly believes in the words "hardship comes and reward comes".His life will not be dark all the way, there will always be a moment of light waiting for him.

He vented his tears in front of his parents' tomb, and buried his cowardice and cowardice in this stone tomb.His mother exchanged his life for his existence. If he was unable to recover from a setback and lived in chaos from then on, what face would he have to face his parents after a hundred years?

Wiping away tears with his sleeves, resisting the choking in his throat, Li Yuan stood up from the cold ground, took a last look at his relatives in the photo, and said to the three Lin family members behind him: "Let's go, I'll come back when the Chinese New Year comes. .”

At that time, he will bring good wine and food, as well as the scriptures he has recited, to worship his relatives.On this New Year's Eve, even if the world is separated forever, he can still spend it with his relatives instead of lying on the bed alone, watching the lights of thousands of families and the fireworks in the sky outside the window.

When he returned to the company, Li Yuan turned into that sunny and lively young man again. He greeted every colleague warmly, and was dedicated to his work. Both Chengfeng and Guanbo’s bosses praised him for being motivated. Future, the six months on the 59th floor were not in vain.

Being mediocre, he decided to temporarily put aside all his troubles and enrich himself with work.The past cannot be traced. Instead of being trapped in the past memories, it is better to challenge the unknown ahead.

The only thing that prevented him from looking directly was He Shichen's meaningful eyes.Every time he met him, he could only find excuses to escape, but the more he did this, the more he wanted to see him.

Their office was only separated by a wall, as long as he opened the door and took a step, he could see He Shichen's concentration.

"I have a disease. The days when I don't see him are as old as an inch, and it burns my heart and intestines. I think about it like crazy, thinking about it like crazy..."

This is a sentence my father wrote in his diary, describing his feelings when he first saw his mother.This sentence appeared in Li Yuan's mind untimely, making his heart suddenly hang.

Isn't that what he is?

How many times, he could hardly suppress the desire in his heart, he wanted to open the door and go out to take a look at He Shichen.

This thought made him panic and panic all day long.He denied his feelings for He Shichen thousands of times in his heart, but he couldn't explain this impulse.

No, it's not love, it's not love!

It's just the greed for human body temperature and the desire for attention in this too cold winter.Even if that person becomes Zhang Shichen or Wang Shichen, it's the same.

Because of his excellent performance in Guanbo, many people in Chengfeng have begun to envy his position, and some of them have already applied to Liang Wenke.He has been in Guanbo for half a year, it's time to give up the opportunity to others, why not take this opportunity to leave, so as to avoid He Shichen's annoying eyes.

He decided to apply to the company tomorrow, resign from Guanbo, and return to Chengfeng to continue his special research.Liang Wenke has already made a promise to him that if his tenure in Guanbo ends, the position of R&D engineer in the technical department has already been prepared for him, and he is just waiting for him to take up the post.

It was a very suitable position for him, allowing him to continue his research without distraction.After learning the mystery of his life experience, he eagerly wants to solve the problem left by his father, because there is hidden the last words his father left him.

After making up his mind, Li Yuan left the company early, these days he would work overtime every day until late before returning home, which would make him feel very fulfilled.

Although it was already dark, but in fact it was still early, Li Yuan decided to go to the supermarket to replenish the necessities before going home.During this period of time, he lived a rough life. Every day when he got home, he fell asleep after washing up. Sometimes he forgot to eat dinner. At most, he would get over it with a bowl of instant noodles when he woke up hungry.

On the way to the nearby supermarket, you will pass a high-end office building. Now it is the rush hour, and countless white-collar workers in suits, ties or high heels pour out of the office building. They are the glamorous and decent elites in this city. Li Yuan always only looked at them enviously, but he didn't expect to become one of them now.

But he still couldn't agree with this point. In his bones, he was still the dick with a sunny surface and a small inferiority complex in his heart. It was only by accident that he met He Shichen that he achieved his current achievements.

But how long will such good luck last, after he rejects the other party?It was impossible for him to rely on He Shichen all his life, and he was incapable of gaining a foothold in society.

He walked in the opposite direction with those white-collar workers, and tired, joyful or plain faces passed by him, and their lives were briefly connected at this moment.

"Etc., etc……"

He heard a man's voice, and because he didn't know who he was calling, he didn't stop.

"Wait, you, are you Li Yuan?"

Hearing his name, Li Yuan finally turned around, and after searching around in the crowd, he fixed his eyes on a tall man.

The other party has a short body size, a very healthy bronze color, and a blue-gray suit that can't hide his strong muscles. He looks like a fitness-loving person.

His facial features made Li Yuan feel familiar, but he couldn't call his name, "You are?"

The other party showed a hearty smile, with two rows of neat white teeth, Li Yuan suddenly remembered his name.

"Senior Brother Lu!"

"Haha, you still remember me, Xiaoyuan," the man strode up to him, patted him on the shoulder, and said with a smile, "I haven't seen you for ten years, I recognized you at the first sight , it seems to be not much different from your junior high school."

Li Yuan smiled reluctantly, because the man in front of him named Lu Yufeng was the favorite student who was kicked out of the house by his father for touching his face.

"Where, stop entertaining me. Brother Lu, do you work here?"

In contrast, Lu Yufeng's expression was much more natural, he hugged Li Yuan's shoulder affectionately like an old friend he hasn't seen for many years, and he dragged him to another direction regardless of whether he liked it or not , "Long time no see, let's go, senior brother treats you to dinner."

"Next time, I have something to do today."

"Let's just say today. There are some things I've been wanting to say to you but haven't had the chance. If I don't tell you, I'm going to suffocate to death!" I have been looking for him for a long time, and if I don't say some words, I am afraid that I will rot in my stomach for a lifetime.

Brother Lu gave him a very good impression. He has a bright personality, loves sports, and has excellent grades. He was also one of the idols he admired back then.If it wasn't for his father suddenly driving him out of the house, I'm afraid they would still be very good friends so far.