under the filth

"A Cen... A Cen..." Intermittent calls lingered in his ears, as if they came from a very distant place.Tang Cen, who fell into a coma, couldn't hear clearly, and thought it was an auditory hallucination in his sleep.

It's so noisy... Tang Cen frowned, unwilling to be awakened from his deep sleep, but the man kept calling his name: "Tang Cen! Tang Cen!"

Tang Cen raised his heavy eyelids, the world in his unfocused eyes was blurred, and he vaguely saw a figure shaking in front of him.Tang Cen's eyelids trembled, but he couldn't recognize the man.Moving his lips, he finally asked in a vague voice, "Who?"

"You're finally awake!" The man's voice suddenly became clear. Tang Cen rubbed his temples and opened his eyes completely after hearing Lu Sheng's shout of surprise.

The quilt was messily wrapped around his body, only a small corner covered his body, and the fabric on his back was completely soaked, clinging to his body.The material of the clothes was close to the skin, and the sticky feeling made Tang Cen very uncomfortable. He slowly straightened up, stretched out his hands, and pulled the clothes to open up a little gap.

Lu Sheng helped Tang Cen sit up, took his own pillow from the head of the bed and put it behind his waist, then pulled the quilt over his lap: "Just now I heard the sound of something falling on the ground outside, I called you for a long time without any response, so I came in."

He raised his hand to cover one side of Tang Cen's cheek, brushing away the messy strands of hair sticking to his cheek.Tang Cen met his eyes and saw the worry in Lu Sheng's eyes.

Tang Cen's state is very wrong, he also had such a situation when we first dated, which frightened Lu Sheng quite a bit.Having not had an episode for so many years, Lu Sheng almost forgot how Tang Cen was in pain when he fell into a nightmare that night.

Thinking of that memory that made him linger in fear, a rare nervous expression appeared on Lu Sheng's face, and he asked cautiously, "What happened?"

"Father...understood." Tang Cen lowered his head and quietly avoided Lu Sheng's hand. The current situation really does not allow him to have such intimate contact with Lu Sheng.

Lu Sheng didn't notice Tang Cen's small movements. He was thinking about the meaning of Tang Cen's words: "Got it? What do you know..." He stopped suddenly in the middle of speaking, and pulled Tang Cen roughly like a wild beast shoulders, his face was livid, and he couldn't help but raise his voice an octave, "You mean we pay—"

Before he finished speaking, Tang Cen raised his hand to cover his mouth, and answered his question in silence.

The skin on his lips was cold and wet, and it was only then that Lu Sheng noticed that Tang Cen looked as if he had been fished out of a cold pool.Lu Sheng looked at him with a complicated expression. If it was because of Tang Songyuan, then everything that happened just now has an explanation, but there are still some things he can't figure out...

"How did he know?" Successive sudden changes made things gradually exceed Lu Sheng's expectations, and his mood became extremely bad because of this, even his tone was somewhat dissatisfied.

He couldn't figure it out, since Tang Cen hadn't mentioned it to his father, and he seldom even called on the phone, what went wrong so suddenly now?Lu Sheng felt apprehensive, how and when did Tang Songyuan know about this?From the beginning?Or just learned about it recently?

Lu Sheng had never treated him with such an attitude, but Tang Cen was not in the mood to complain at the moment.His brain was forcibly awakened from sleep, and he is still in dizziness. If possible, Tang Cen just wants to lie on the bed and have a good sleep, but his father's words are like sharp thorns, repeatedly piercing his nerves , making him restless.

With all the things on Tang Cen's body, his heart was in a mess, and even his fingertips began to tremble slightly.Tang Cen put his arms around Lu Sheng's neck and leaned his head on his chest: "I don't know...I really...don't know..."

Lu Sheng calmed down instantly with his crying voice and almost submissive gestures. He patted Tang Cen on the back and slowed down his tone: "What else did he say? Did he make things difficult for you?"

Nestled in Lu Sheng's arms, Tang Cen shook his head: "He didn't say anything else, just let me break up with you, and go back immediately after graduation." However, no matter which of these two requests is to Tang Cen, Very difficult.

After getting along day and night for so many years, Lu Sheng naturally heard it.He tightened his arms and held Tang Cen tightly in his arms: "Let's not talk about this, your face is ugly, is there any discomfort?"

Tang Cen didn't make a sound, and leaned quietly on his shoulder.But where Lu Sheng couldn't see, Tang Cen clenched his trembling hand, bit his lower lip tightly, and swallowed all the small whimpers into his stomach.

Just when Lu Sheng thought he was asleep, Tang Cen broke free from Lu Sheng's embrace suddenly: "I'm fine, just leave me alone."

Staring at Tang Cen's face, Lu Sheng wanted to see something more from the expression on his face, but he gave up after a while.As usual, he rubbed Tang Cen's hair and stood up: "Okay, just call me if you need anything."

"En." Tang Cen nodded, sitting on the bed with his knees hugged, but his eyes followed Lu Sheng's back, watching him out of the bedroom.

After Lu Sheng left the room, Tang Cen slowly opened the cabinet and took out an exquisite vintage candy box from it.He unscrewed the copper lid of the candy box, poured out two oval flat slices, and swallowed it with the glass of cold water that had been placed on the bedside table at some time.

Tang Cen couldn't remember what kind of mood he had in making the choice to return to China, nor how he faced his furious father and still stubbornly insisted on that love with no future in sight. In desperation, he really couldn't think of any other solution.

Even after 11 years, let Tang Cen make a choice, he will not sever the father-son relationship with Tang Songyuan with a phone call on the other side of the ocean across the ocean and mountains.If this question is put in front of him again, maybe he will still make the same choice.

In a corner of the airport, Lu Sheng looked at the flight information constantly beating on the huge screen above his head, and asked the apparently absent-minded person beside him, "Have you really made up your mind?"

Tang Cen looked at the marble tiles in the airport hall, rubbed his fingertips on the handle of the suitcase a few times: "Go back."

In the past three months, Tang Cen didn't receive a call from Tang Songyuan again, and he didn't know if he had figured it out, but this time, he didn't want to be a coward anymore.

The name engraved on the bone also reminded him from time to time...

Seeing that Tang Cen was determined to return to China, Lu Sheng didn't persuade him any more. He silently dragged the suitcase and walked towards the security checkpoint holding Tang Cen's cold hand.

Following the strong sense of weightlessness upon landing and the sound of landing gear tires rubbing against the ground, Tang Cen returned to his hometown again, but this time, there was no one waiting to greet him at the gate of the airport.

Seeing that Tang Cen looked around for a few times but couldn't find the person he was looking for, Lu Sheng looked at the lonely look in his eyes and couldn't help but said, "Is there no one here to pick you up?"

Tang Cen took his suitcase from Lu Sheng's hand, and pushed him towards the taxi pick-up area: "You go to the hotel first, I... take a taxi home by myself."

Lu Sheng was pushed into the aisle by him, and when the taxi stopped in front of him, he opened the door, pushed Tang Cen into the car with his backhand, and put his luggage in before Tang Cen had time to speak. trunk.

Through the glass, Lu Sheng mouthed Tang Cen: "Be careful on the road."

Tang Cen leaned on the rear window, watching Lu Sheng's figure gradually disappear before his eyes.He sat slumped on the back seat of the taxi, staring at the scenery outside the window with his eyes open, counting the countdown silently in his heart.

The taxi stopped in front of Tang Cen's familiar gate. After paying, Tang Cen pulled the suitcase and pushed open the gate of his house.

Like every time he went home, Tang Cen prepared to greet him as usual: "Father, I'll go back..."

"I don't have a shameless son like you! Get out of here and go to the study!" Tang Songyuan's scolding came from the second floor, interrupting Tang Cen.

When Tang Cen heard the yelling, the handle of the suitcase came out of his hand, and the out-of-control suitcase slid for a short distance in the empty hall, and slowly stopped at the butler's feet.

At this moment, beside Tang Songyuan, a boy with baby fat on his face tugged at his sleeve, and said nervously: "Father! Brother just came back..."

However, after learning that Tang Cen returned to China with the man who lived with him, Tang Songyuan, who was furious, refused to listen to any persuasion.He shook off the boy's hand, strode into the study, leaving behind Tang Qian who was still standing there, raising his hand in embarrassment to keep him.

"A Qian." Tang Cen walked up the stairs, reached out and rubbed his younger brother's head while shaking his head silently.

"But bro!" Tang Qian grabbed Tang Cen's lapel as if he had found a backbone, "You really want to do it for that man and father..."

"Stop talking!" Tang Cen suddenly scolded, then softened his tone, "Go back to your room."

Tang Qian clutched the corner of Tang Cen's clothes unwillingly, watched as Tang Cen opened his fingers little by little, and walked into the study alone.

Tang Cen entered the study, and after the door of the study was slowly closed, Tang Songyuan yelled, "Kneel down!"

That sound was like thunder on the ground, and Tang Cen's messy thoughts were suddenly wiped out.He looked at the cane in Tang Songyuan's hand, and slowly squatted down, kneeling on the dark carpet.Tang Cen did not lower his head, he looked straight ahead, and his eyes fell on the edge of the desk.

In Tang Songyuan's eyes, his calm appearance aroused his irritable nerves even more, and he slammed his cane on the ground twice: "I told you to separate you from that man! You still took him with you I'm back! Have you put my father in your eyes?"

No matter what Tang Songyuan said, Tang Cen knelt motionless and let those harsh words hit him.

Tang Songyuan saw that he was not willing to enter, so he was determined to fight himself to the end, and raised his cane.He almost gritted his teeth, and even said a little unscrupulously: "I only let you hang out with him when you were just playing, but you are good, studying abroad is not enough, and you have to sell it like a male (prostitute)." butt!"

Tang Cen knelt on the ground, digging at his knees with his fingers.He never thought that one day he would hear such words from his father, nor did he think that in his father's eyes, he was no different from those men (prostitutes).

"Father..." He raised his head, his voice trembling so much that he could barely hear the content.

Tang Songyuan didn't want to hear one more word from Tang Cen: "Shut up!"

The cane landed on his body fiercely, making ferocious red marks on his fair skin, but Tang Cen knelt quietly the whole time, watching Tang Songyuan wave the cane.His body was like a puppet and he lost all consciousness, and he couldn't feel any pain when the cane fell on him.

The pain from the cane left on his body was far more piercing and piercing than the reprimand from his father's mouth.

Until now, he could finally understand that the girl who used to sit at the next table had suffered through the past 19 years of her life, and what he was experiencing at this moment was so insignificant compared to what she had endured all these years.

Tang Cen's memories that had been buried for eight years were awakened one by one with the whipping of the cane, and the girl's blurred face gradually became clear.The body sank in the icy sea water, Tang Cen stretched out his hand to her, and the moment his fingertips were about to touch her, the girl's face turned into a piece of empty foam and disappeared into the dark deep sea.

The moment the girl disappeared, Tang Cen's pupils suddenly constricted, his tightly pursed lips moved, and he murmured two words silently.

After a long time, when the half of the cane that was broken by Tang Songyuan fell to his side, Tang Cen slowly lowered his head as if giving up, and closed the pair of glasses that once shone with stars like the night sky. Eye.

It turns out that the pain caused by my close relatives is like this, and I can finally understand.

Jiang Yan...