On the Formation of a Pseudo Stand-In

Mu Chengan didn't know how he survived these days, if it wasn't for the person on the bed who was still breathing, he would have collapsed with him under the embankment that day.

He sat on the bench at the entrance of the hospital, smoked an unknown number of cigarettes one by one, rubbed his eyes occasionally, and let out a deep breath until the last cigarette butt was pressed out in the trash can.

He lowered his head and rubbed his face with his palms, then Mu Chengan got up and walked towards the gate in a nonchalant manner.

The lack of sleep in the past few days made him feel a little dazed, and he almost bumped into several people along the way.

But the strange thing is, his mind seemed to be sober, unprecedentedly sober, Mu Chengan shuttled through the hospital in a hurry, and finally bumped into someone.

"Sorry." Mu Chengan paused, bowed his head and apologized.

That person also didn't look at the road, and ran straight into him without turning around. The two of them gritted their teeth and let out noises. Mu Chengan felt a dull pain in his shoulder, and raised his head belatedly.

"It's okay...huh?" The man in a white coat rubbed his right shoulder, met Mu Chengan's face, and exclaimed, "Mu Chengan?"

Hearing his own name, Mu Chengan looked at the people who came by intently. He was startled, and his face that was originally heavy and shelled relaxed, with a trace of surprise: "...Xiao Ran?"

Xiao Ran also changed his expression to be calm, and relaxed his brows. He bumped his shoulder into the opponent with a smile: "I'm touched, you can still remember the name of my old friend."

Maybe it was because of the heat, he buried his head and rolled up his sleeves: "I still had contact with you a few years ago, but suddenly I lost the news..."

Looking up, he frowned slightly, and the dissatisfaction in his words overflowed: "I wanted to waste time with you, so it's a bad plot to disappear suddenly. Later, I felt that this was boring, so I asked someone to ask, the result? Ask After walking around, everyone said they couldn’t reach you.”

The shoulder that had finally recovered was hurt again, Mu Chengan let out a "hiss", rubbed his shoulders and listened to the long series of accusations, he always felt that time did not go too fast.

He wanted to smile at an old friend he hadn't seen for a long time, but unfortunately he pulled the corner of his mouth, but the expression he made was obviously stiff.

Xiao Ran also noticed it, and then recalled where it was, and asked hesitantly, "You... come to see a doctor?"

"No." Mu Chengan closed his eyes, as if he was covering up something, and shook his head stiffly, "I'll accompany my lover."

There were people coming and going in the corridor, and some people who came in a hurry passed by dissatisfiedly, Xiao Ran dragged the guy opposite who was obviously distracted, and made way for the wall.

He let go of his hand, but his brows were furrowed, and his words were filled with caution: "Is she very ill?"

"You should know him, right? I mentioned it back then..." Mu Chengan seemed to think of something when he heard the words, his sharp eyes softened a little, and he answered the wrong question, "There's a little guy who doesn't want a good job. It's very interesting to chase after my door to apply for a housekeeper..."

Unexpectedly, the other party would mention this suddenly, Xiao Ran was startled, and vaguely recalled that the other party had mentioned casually back then that the protagonist of the story was a boy.

Reconnecting with what he heard before, his expression almost froze in shock.

But facing Mu Chengan's pale face and drifting ignorance, Xiao Ran immediately threw all of this away, frowned, and shouted in a deep voice: "Mu Chengan."

The other party was still in a bad mood and didn't respond, Xiao Ran became anxious and raised his voice a bit: "Mu Chengan!"

Mu Chengan's eyes flickered, as if he had just withdrawn from his memories, and twitched the corners of his mouth in apology.

He rubbed his face, and when he spoke again, his voice was hoarse: "Sorry, I just remembered something about the past... You are still working, hurry up, I should go see him..."

After all, he withdrew his hand and stuffed it into his pocket. The first time he dazedly wiped his clothes, and the second time he put it in, his face was expressionless and he was about to move.

Seeing this, Xiao Ran's expression became more and more serious, and he stretched out his hand to grab him: "Get off work now, wait a minute. You are in a bad mental state now, and I happen to be working in this field. Even if you disappeared for a few years for no reason, as the former Good friend, I still suggest that you take some time to do some psychological counseling..."

Mu Chengan was in a hurry to go to the ward, but he was stopped before he could stretch out one foot. His whole body was instantly enveloped in anxiety, and it took him a while to understand what the other party said.

Shen Lian stared at his friend's dignified expression. After a long time, he seemed to be unable to bear it. He spun his heels and leaned hard against the wall.

Tilting his head slightly, he stared at the white light on the ceiling, his voice hoarse: "Okay, I know it all, I know it all. I can still hold on, it's just that I haven't slept well recently..."

"You know, I'm afraid when I close my eyes, I'm so scared, I keep having the same nightmare over and over again... Besides, if I don't look at him, I don't feel at ease, and I dare not sleep."

Xiao Ran didn't expect that after so many years, this person who is good to everyone, but calm and gentle to everyone, also has someone who can be desperate.

He also felt uncomfortable looking at it. His frown had never been relaxed since the beginning. After a long silence, he asked softly, "What's his situation now? He's comatose?"

"Well, I've been sleeping." Mu Chengan heard his voice erratic, as if it didn't come from his own mouth, "I don't know how long it will take to wake up."

"That guy...he is sleepy." Xiao Ran stared at the other person, and found that only when he mentioned that person, would he have a gentleness with vitality, and he would no longer be heavy. Well, even the way you stay in bed is funny, but this time it looks very angry..."

"Okay, please don't show up." Xiao Ran saw that the other party was going to be involved in memories again, so he hurriedly interrupted, trying to be more active, "Give me your mobile phone and save the number."

Mu Chengan shut his mouth, put his head down, took out the phone from his pocket, and silently watched the other party press his phone.

After a vibration, the other party threw the phone back with satisfaction.

"Contact you when I have time, don't disappear again." After Xiao Ran finished speaking solemnly, he paused for two seconds and asked, "By the way, what's your... lover's name? I'll go and ask for you, the doctor in this hospital I know them well."

"Ye Luo." Mu Chengan put these two words between his teeth, and whispered softly, his whole body turned into a warm tone while chewing, "His name is Ye Luo."

Pushing open the door, Mu Chengan held his breath and looked towards the bed with hope, only to see that the person on the bed was still silent and closed his eyes, as quiet as if he was about to be drowned in air.

He closed his eyes, and after his chest heaved violently a few times, he walked towards the bed.

Gently sat down on the chair, first he avoided looking at the person on the bed, put his face in the palm of his hand for a long time, then looked up with a smile on his face.

Mu Chengan spoke softly, like a love story to a lover: "Guess who I met just now? Xiao Ran, do you remember? I used to go to the orphanage with him..."

He paused for a few seconds, then smiled and said: "Forget it, I'm sorry you don't know."

Mu Chengan raised his hand, as if he wanted to touch the skin of the person on the hospital bed who was being transfused, but before the fingertips touched him, he curled up his fingers and retracted them halfway: "After all, it was you who said it yourself. I'm alone."

This ward has its own pale silence, and the rest is only the coldness of the instrument, and the whispers.

"Exceeding points, you." Mu Chengan seemed unaware, and still muttered to himself, "After you catch up with me, you won't mention these anymore, and you've been trying your best to lie to me all day long..."

The wave of memories came again, and he, who was almost completely submerged, struggled to get out, his throat tightened, and his whole body and voice trembled slightly, looking at the pale lips of the person on the bed: "Wake up quickly, okay? I blamed me for not protecting you well...forgive me and give me a chance..."

His voice was trembling and eager, like broken bricks and tiles falling down one by one, as if he was forcibly supporting something that was crumbling with words: "I will not let anyone have a chance to hurt you again, neither will anyone, nor will I. Can."

Unfortunately, no one answered the whole time.

On the chair, there was a single figure elongated by the moonlight, and the whole room was filled with boundless loneliness.

Afterwards, probably it was Xiao Ran who really asked that the doctor who had hurriedly checked and then turned away would also take advantage of some free time to chat with Mu Chengan, who was staring at the patient stiffly, and comfort him a few times along the way. sentence.

Mu Chengan was extremely grateful, even if he was in a trance, he would bite his lips and listen carefully, while thanking him sincerely, while occasionally glancing at the person who was sleeping peacefully on the hospital bed.

After a long time, the doctor who saw this scene every day couldn't bear it, and said hesitantly one day: "The patient's body is almost fine, and now we only need an opportunity to wake him up. Can cross this hurdle, Then it's probably fine."

"You usually try to call him more, and touch him occasionally, which is also beneficial to the patient. I think you just watch anxiously from the side every time, without saying a word or moving..."

The doctor smiled reassuringly, and patted him on the shoulder: "I understand your worry, but you don't have to and shouldn't be so nervous. You have to learn to be active before you can help the patient wake up."

After hearing this, Mu Chengan's fingers trembled, and then they clenched into fists.

Pulling the corner of his mouth, he nodded: "Thank you, I see."

After the doctor left, Mu Chengan still sat on the chair, like a stiff and silent piece of wood.

Since that day, I hurriedly carried Ye Luo to this hospital, and after putting it down, I almost never touched him again.

One is that I was afraid that I was too clumsy and bumped into places that shouldn't be touched, and the other is...

His eyes were sore, he rubbed them vigorously, put his hands down and rubbed his head again, but no tears came out.

Mu Chengan didn't dare to touch him.

He was afraid, just like in that distressing nightmare, the little guy on the hospital bed who used to gently rub against him, smiling silently, now hated him terribly.

Why is he still refusing to wake up?To be left alone in this empty place.

It must be because you don't want to, so open your eyes and take a look at yourself.

It was I who came late, leaving him to wither alone, on such sharp stones and desolate soil.

The author has something to say:

I finally tossed and went home and coded with peace of mind qwq

The scumbag went on to mess with it and made up for what was owed the day before orz

Thank you little cuties for coming in~Thank you for the new wild little angel^^