Divergent

In the fourth month of the breakup, she came back from a monthly leave.I said I wanted to meet her and she agreed.

I carried four or five bottles of beer and she came to the abandoned train bridge in the town.She was wearing a sky blue long dress that day, she was extremely beautiful.I believe that everyone who has seen her will surrender to her skirt, she is like a rare guest from heaven.

She only drank one bottle, and I drank the rest.We talk about music and current affairs, not about love.We swapped each other's recent obsessions, and I recommend Eason's "Song of the Day" and "The Tempest."The tacit understanding is that she recommended to me the Mandarin version of "Songs of Time" - "Brothers and Sisters".

It was very windy and cold that day, with a little rain.She urged me to go home quickly, but I told her: "You go back first, I want to blow the cold wind here alone, sober." She said: "No, you will catch a cold. Go away." She wanted to come Pulling me, I shook my head, walked to the railing of the bridge and pretended to jump off.She was so frightened that she rushed over and stopped me and said, "You don't believe me when they say you're naughty after drinking too much! Stop making trouble, it's too dangerous! People who don't know think we're going to die for love!"

In fact, how could I get drunk with just those few bottles of wine, I just wanted to see how she would react.Seeing that she was so frightened that she almost lost her soul gave me a lot of satisfaction.He obediently followed her on the way back.This time it was me following her, alas, her back is so beautiful.I pinched my face to make sure I wasn't dreaming.

I wanted to go up and take her hand, but I didn't.I was afraid that she would hate me even more, so forget it.

When we came to the fork in the road and we should part, she suddenly turned around and kissed my lips.I was stunned, she obviously hated me, why did she kiss me again... My unsatisfied brain instantly sank into a blue screen, and after a few seconds, I said at a loss: "... go home Bar."

Looking at the back of her going away, I no longer feel happy in my heart, and I know that these things will leave me soon.

In the fifth month of our breakup, my friend and I got very drunk in the corner shop.After my friend went back, I found the "old friend" Street Lamp alone with the wine.I leaned on it, talking to myself about wine.Say something and have a sip of wine.

No matter when, as long as I come to it, it can quietly listen to what I say in my heart.It understands me and understands my feelings for her better.

After drinking, I said goodbye to my "old friend".It helplessly shed tears.

After returning home, I picked up my mobile phone and called her who was far away in another city.The call was connected, and it was still the Mandarin I was most familiar with:

"what's up?"

"Um...well...what are you doing now?...Are you free?"

"Nothing, just play."

"Oh, I wanted to tell you something."

"Well, tell me!"

"Actually... I've always had you in my heart. I'm sorry for the things I did to hurt you before. I regret it. It's my fault. Let's make up... shall we?"

There was a long silence on the other end of the phone, and he said, "No, I won't reconcile with you."

"Why? Because of her? I'm only with her to annoy you! Can you give me another chance to make up for it? Just once, the last time! I will cherish it and get rid of all my shortcomings!"

Her tone suddenly became very cold: "...Then let me tell you! It was indeed because of her before, but it's not anymore. I don't like you anymore....A chance...Didn't I give it to you? I I won't give you another chance, who would forgive someone endlessly?"

"What? Didn't you say you love me? Don't make trouble, okay, let's stop fighting. I know you have me in your heart. I was wrong, really wrong, stop making trouble. "

"I didn't make trouble, so don't you. You're not Li Xing, and I'm not He Qiaoqiao. I always thought it was love, but now I see it clearly, it's just dependence."

"Heh...heh...what?...dependence?"

Tears flowed down without listening to my persuasion, and I never imagined that those words came out of her mouth.It seems that when she came to me to reconcile before, I also hurt her in such a tone.It's like she gave me back the hurt I gave her one knife at a time, and let me taste the pain she had tasted before.She's still doing well, she's doing well, isn't she?

My voice was completely choked up, and my heart seemed to be thrown to the South Pole in an instant, and the pain was unbearably cold.For the first time, I knew what the pain of heartbreak is called.The heart was hardened into countless pieces.

"I know you're a forward-looking person," she said. "You'll find better girls."

"No, I really regret it! You pity me, don't let me wander, okay? You know, these days I always miss you so much that I can't sleep." I turned into pleading.

Yes, this is much like the dialogue between the two when I rejected her coldly.The two people who were just talking have changed positions.

Her tone suddenly became very excited: "Insomnia? You can buy sleeping pills for insomnia!! What does it matter to me?! If one is not enough, take a few more!"

After listening to it, I almost collapsed and laughed like crazy.

I said coldly: "Okay, I finally see you clearly, just rely on it! Do you really think you are strange? Hehe, in fact, I have never loved you."

At that time, I wanted to hurt her and hurt me back, so I deliberately said that I never loved her.

She didn't speak, so I went on to say: "The Yao Qian I knew is dead, you are not her, you just wear her skin and have the same name as her. She is dead."

After speaking, she hung up the phone.

Under the influence of alcohol, in the early morning, the pain took me to write the first poem in my life - "Hibiscus".Because her QQ nickname at the time was "Mujin", so I took this as the title.In that poem, I loaded my mood that day, and also assumed the scene of meeting her 20 years later. This is how "Hibiscus" came into being. Although it doesn't have such gorgeous language, every time I read it, it will bring me to the picture in the words.

I stayed up all night that day.

The next morning, I calmed down and apologized to her.I said it was all because I drank too much alcohol yesterday, it's okay if we don't get along, but I hope we can still be friends in the future."Well, only friends," she said.

Even though we later pulled our last thread in the name of friends, the stranger was still a stranger, unchanged.We do not greet each other, do not disturb each other, the only way to communicate is to leave a message in a friend's space.

Jiaqi is our mutual friend, and they are still best friends.

We will leave our feelings of the day in Jiaqi's space every night, and of course our favorite lyrics.We can all learn about each other's recent situation and what songs the other party likes recently from Jiaqi's space.Of course Jiaqi knew that we all left messages for each other to read, so she tacitly did not delete any of our messages.

The 5 Youth Day school held a large-scale cultural evening for the first time. I passed the preliminary competition with "Glory Years" with the mentality of giving it a try. In the finals, I sang a song from the bottom of my heart - "She Far Away" .I got the most flowers and applause from the audience that night. (Actually, all the girls in our class sent flowers. It was purely "premeditated" to create an atmosphere.) What "male god", "song god" and "almighty little prince" "Ah, a series of titles that don't match me were all deducted from me that day, and it became popular all over the school. I also accidentally won the No. 4 song and dance program.For the next few weeks, the campus radio played "She Far Away" on a loop.Maybe she heard the classmate in the original class talk about the performance on May 1th. I saw her leave a sentence on Jiaqi's message board. She said she didn't know when he sang that song under the spotlight. Who is it.

Yes, I chose to sing the song "The Distant She" because I wanted to send it to her who is far away in another city, that distant her.