Before graduation, hold down the restless you

That weak voice seemed to isolate Yan He from all the noise behind him.

Wherever he went, it seemed to be covered with a thin film, and there were vague building shadows in his field of vision.There is a profound confusion in the wind blowing on the face, and everything seems to be engraved with two words: silence.

What broke that barrier was his slight sob.

The heart wall that has been built for so long seems to have collapsed across the board.

He thought about it and tried again.

Even if someone scolds you for being cheap...

Even if he repeats the same mistakes and is severely betrayed again...

He didn't want to struggle with himself anymore, he was too tired.

Close your eyes, you can see the purest world.The end of the world is Gu Ze.

Thoughts become sensitive and slender amid constant pain.

The originally small details that are easily overlooked are constantly reappearing in front of our eyes frame by frame.

His face was all over his head.

The face that frowned and carefully studied the breakfast every day as if facing an enemy, the face that ignored his nonsense and took the trouble to answer his questions one by one seriously, that face that was just, upright and calm defending the offender again and again of his face.

The look of tolerance, the look of helplessness, the look of joy, the look of astonishment, the look of hating him so much that he can't bear to do anything.

Walking through an ancient vast field, through the dew of long days and nights, the way he smiled and stretched out his hand calmly.

The moment I held his hands, my heart sank with peace.

So even if you don't want to reply to his text messages, you will secretly inquire about his latest news with Fan Jun, flipping through the latest magazine about him in the bookstore...

So even if I say no over and over again, I still can't help but let the crazy fantasies and obsessions grow endlessly in my heart...

So even though he hovered above his head quietly and silently like a giant dragon, he still couldn't bear to leave him alone...

Still want to see that person.

If he still had a choice, he would still raise his sleepy eyes, rest his chin lazily on such a sweltering afternoon, like most high school students who fall in love, read the whole board book in the mist, Carefully and carefully write "Gu Ze" on the paper with one stroke of the pen.

Use the black fountain pen that is about to run out, and use the rotten characters like a dog crawling.

At an age that doesn't know what to worry about.

The sky is high, the wind is clear, and the clouds are light.

It's very clean, gentle and beautiful.

Think carefully.

From the re-encounter to the present, in the only few conversations, Yan He realized that he had never asked him how he was doing, where he was now, and whether the writing days would be too tiring.

He could only see how glamorous Gu Ze was in everyone's mouths and eyes.

Then he relied on the gentleness and reconciliation that Gu Ze gave him with peace of mind.

It seems that when he was still in high school, he, who was not afraid of tigers as a newborn calf, stepped on the tail of the school rules and grades over and over again, and asked Gu Ze to deal with his aftermath.

Only give him one person, alone, aftermath.

Then Gu Ze was criticized by his classmates.

Even so, Gu Ze was always calm and quiet.

Like a broad hand, it easily smoothed out all the wrinkles in his heart.

However, he was young and ignorant, but he didn't even have the most basic greeting.

Gu Ze always hides all the difficulties and troubles in the depths. When standing in front of him, there is always a strength that makes him feel at ease.

It was so, and it is still so.

Called several times, except for the cold "the other party has shut down", nothing happened.

Even a die-hard fan like Fan Jun can't explain Gu Ze's schedule and current address today.

It was the rush hour for getting off work. Pedestrians walked past Yan He, in suits and leather shoes, and they walked in a hurry.As Yan He walked, he avoided the running child holding the marshmallow from time to time.A tall guy in a baseball cap walked away, and Yan He almost turned his face and called him Mr. Gu just a moment later.

There was a crowd of people, and he knew that that person must be in the crowd, but he couldn't find it.

He couldn't find anything.

Everything is silent.

Only his faint cough can disturb Gu Ze's shallow sleep.

It was getting dark very quickly, and a muck truck passed quickly, splashing mud all over Yan He's body.

He walked forward tirelessly, even in a trance for a moment, wondering where he was going.

But subconsciously, he didn't dare to stop his footsteps, as if he would miss something if he slackened.

Gradually, the school in memory finally appeared in front of my eyes, but the person in front of me was not the person in my memory.

Mingli, who had just come out of school, looked at the embarrassed Yan He with a look of surprise.A little familiar, as if he had seen him like this many years ago.

"Yan He, what's the matter with you?" He quickly walked forward a few steps.

However, the person in front of him just gently brushed his hand away and shook his head.

Suddenly, he fell back again, and asked quickly and eagerly with almost double the decibel than usual: "Do you know where Gu Ze lives?"

"I don't know." Mingli frowned deeply, since he saw the two of them walking together that day, he knew that things would not be that simple.

Feeling something was wrong subconsciously, he grabbed the arm of Yan He who was walking forward, and asked in a questioning tone: "Do you know what you are doing?"

Yan He looked at him: "I clearly know that I did something wrong."

But he also knew there was only so much he could do.

He just wants to do it.

The house under the night is a little strange.

I used to think that this place would never fade.

Many "thoughts".

The person inside had passed away three years ago, and he didn't know what else he was looking for here.

Sore eyes.

This place seemed to be the last stop of memories, he couldn't find him, and the people in his memories seemed unwilling to stay where they were, getting farther and farther away from him.

He knelt down and cried.A few years ago, when I was beaten, I didn't cry as badly as I do today.In the empty corridor, the crying of a mature man at night seemed so weird and weird. He could think of being scolded in a trance, but he couldn't care less.

After an unknown amount of time, there was a sudden "ding" sound from the elevator.

Someone came out of the elevator quickly, and the quiet space seemed to be able to hear the other person's hasty and rapid breathing.

A pair of familiar black leather shoes appeared in the field of vision.In the muddy lights, the past is overwhelming and rushing towards us.

The person in front of him squatted down.

Ignoring the lumps of tears and mud caked on his face, Yan He rubbed against the man vigorously.

When he raised his eyes, Yan He could see the fine wrinkles in the corners of his eyes and his face that no longer looked young.

I saw his tears one by one, running down his thin face, flowing through the nasal cavity, falling whole, breaking into thousands of words.

When it comes to feelings, they don't want much, so that's fine.

Really

well.

[End of text]