the years you weren't around

The past that had long been sealed in dust reappeared like yesterday. Gu Mingwei clenched his phone tightly. After a while, he put his elbows on his knees and buried his head deeply in his hands.

Ten years ago, Lin Chen was a willful and stubborn person in Gu Mingwei's heart.He would throw away the vegetables because he ate a little bit of ginger that was barely visible to the naked eye, and his face would become elongated because of his own negligence, just like a child with missing teeth.

But now, Gu Mingwei suddenly remembered that Lin Chen threw away the food because it was too spicy, and the monk's stomach has always been bad, and he always ignored him for various reasons.I don't remember his birthday, I don't remember Valentine's Day, I don't have romantic dates and beautiful love words.

"It turns out that I owe you so much." Gu Mingwei murmured.I never thought about whether you feel safe and happy by my side. I always thought we were forced to part, but now I realize that I never let you really get close.

Like an idiot, Gu Mingwei tossed and turned his memories of the days with Lin Chen, only to realize that the past happiness was covered in dust, but he was confused by the dust and never really saw it clearly.

Thinking of Lin Chen's surprise smile when he occasionally received a gift from himself, the affectionate eyes in Lin Chen's eyes when he secretly looked at him, and the hesitation when Lin Chen looked at him in despair and expectation after being discovered by his grandma .He must have hoped that he could stand with him, but what did he say?

"Grandma, I provoked Lin Chen first, and it's all because of me..." Zeng thought he was affectionately protecting, but in fact he pushed him away fiercely, letting him walk on the edge alone.

"Gu Mingwei, how do you know that I will suffer! How do you know that we have no future?"

"So what if someone looks at you with tinted glasses? I'm not afraid!"

"Gu Mingwei, all I want is to be with you!"

Lin Chen, what kind of mood did you have when you said these words?

This society doesn't give us too many ways for us to choose, either to be happy secretly, or to grit our teeth and give up and return to the so-called right way.So I flinched, but why do you continue to walk forward alone?

Lin Chen, so you love me so much.

Time is ruthless, I don't want to disappoint you the second time, I will walk with you on the next road, rain or shine.

"Lin Chen." Without hesitation, he dialed the number stored in this afternoon, and the call was connected immediately, which shows that the person was not asleep.

"Gu Mingwei." Lin Chen responded, and laughed softly, and the deep laughter made people's heart throb even more when it came to his ears through the phone.Gu Mingwei even felt that his warm breath was sprayed in his ears, and his body smelled of the fragrance of oranges.

Gu Mingwei suddenly felt a little regretful, but he could only bite the bullet and ask, "Did you sleep?"

"No, you didn't sleep either?"

These words were very ambiguous, and in Gu Mingwei's ears it became: I couldn't sleep because I met you.The scalp is a little numb. "Is it tiring when you're with me?"

I have always thought that I am the defender of our relationship, but I never ask you how you feel.It's the same when we're together, and it's the same when we're apart.

Lin Chen didn't seem to expect that he would ask this, and he was silent for a long time before he let go of his emotion: "It's very tiring, you are very afraid of being known, and you never hold my hand outside, and you will be angry if you call you dear, of course Others can't see it, but I can feel it." Lin Chen paused, then said concisely, "Gu Mingwei, you are quite an asshole."

"..." Gu Mingwei suddenly felt that he had touched Lin Chen from high school, sharp, proud, and arrogant.Of course, maybe he just has a tendency to shake M. "Lin Chen, I was wrong. Back then, I didn't treat you well and didn't trust you."

"Ah."

"I shouldn't have scolded you, and told you to go away. In fact, I was very sad at that time."

"Ah."

"I always thought you didn't want to come back when you knew grandma passed away, so I hated you for that."

"Ah."

"...Honey, I'm sorry."

"It's ok."

It's okay to say that Gu Mingwei's eyes were red without warning, and his nose was sore, as if he had been punched.

My dear, all the ups and downs of the years when you were not by my side felt normal, and there was a feeling of numbness and indifference, but from the moment I reunited with you, the stagnant time finally flowed again, allowing me to see some things clearly, Give me the courage to take a step forward.

"Lin Chen, I have always loved you all these years." Even though I wanted to forget, I always miss you madly for countless moments.

"Then can you give me a little trust?" Let me no longer drift outside your world, but stand with you.

"it is good."

"Then, I love you too."

postscript:

In the summer of 12 years ago, Lin Chen was happily running on the basketball court with a few buddies. He inadvertently looked at the main road and saw a tall and handsome young man walking lazily. He swept the court from time to time. With one glance, there was a sense of indifference.

Lin Chen flew the ball out of his hand in a daze, and the monk next to him yelled anxiously, but didn't pay much attention.

Seeing that the lazy young man quickly moved a few steps to the side to avoid the ball, Lin Chen slowly raised the corners of his lips.

-end