as if poisoned

only you

I can't let go

maybe it hurts

i can let go

But what can I do if I let it go after I understand the pain

You are still a thorn in my heart

=========================================

Yes, I found out that I like Huang Shengjia, how can it be?From a worldly perspective, we are destined not to be together, and he also likes my best friend, Qin Nuo.

"Hey, Yu Yan, what are you thinking? Why are you sitting here alone in a daze?" I seemed to be sitting in this seat of the library for a long time, and even the most patient Qin Nuo came over to ask me what was wrong.

"Did you run out of money to eat again?" Sheng Jia, who was walking behind her, asked.How should I face him now?

In the eyes of some people, homosexuals are a disgusting group. They are weak and ridiculed.The so-called normal people around will only watch it as a farce and a joke.What qualifications do they have?

"I'm wondering...whether I should go back to see my mother next month. It's not that I don't have money to eat, I still have a job!"

Do you want to ask why I have a job, but why I often have no money to eat?It's very simple, my rent, tuition and miscellaneous fees, living expenses, book fees, everything needs money.When some expenses are exceeded, I will replace it with meal expenses, and I can only save meal expenses.

"You shouldn't be working later, right? I'll treat you to dinner," Sheng Jia said.He is really kind to my friend, I really know it, but I don't know how to face him, especially since he is still chasing Qin Nuo...

"I can't, I'm going to find multiple jobs, it's almost the middle of the year, and I have to save for next year's expenses." I found a random reason for refusing, but it is a fact that I need to save money, and I can only use This is an excuse to decline, but how many times can such an excuse be declined?He already knows my life like the back of his hand.

He is like water, invading my life bit by bit, but I can't even refuse. He can be free without water, but how can I live without water?

"Okay then, let's make an appointment next time." He patted me on the shoulder, said a few words to Qin Nuo, motioned to me and left.

They are a natural couple, right?And with so many boys chasing Qin Nuo, she was only willing to let him chase her.Maybe... I...

Forget it.

I have never liked anyone before, and now it is really painful to like a boy of the same gender.what do I do?Crouching on the table, burying myself in my arms, I despaired of myself.

Forget it, even if I warn myself like this, I still can't help thinking about it.Why doesn't anyone reach out and grab themselves in times of despair?

Sighing, he tidied up the things on the table, put them back on the bookshelf, and left.

It was a little hot outside the library, I took out a bottle of water from my old school bag, looked up and drank it, enjoying it.Let's go and get a job.

It is really easy to find, but how many people want to invite themselves?I have already done so many jobs, and there are really few jobs that can match my time.Maybe let go of the tutor?But the salary of the tutor is only enough to pay for the tuition...

Sigh, this world is really difficult.Even we are insignificant, we can only live at the mercy of others.But we have no choice, life "spit"!

There was a man next to me looking at me with a strange expression, maybe he thought I was spitting on him when I just spat?I smiled apologetically and hurried away.It's really embarrassing to make a joke.

After walking two steps, I saw that this bookstore was recruiting staff, so I walked in and asked, "Excuse me, are you still recruiting staff here?"

The man in the apron looked at me, stared me up and down and circled back to my face, "Fuck, but can you?"

I nodded solemnly, I will never take things carelessly.

"Okay, wait a minute, our store manager will be back soon. Go and have a look, our books here are still pretty good."

I nodded again, the most important thing is to make a good first impression, and I am still clear about this.I plan to go shopping according to his words, and it happens that I also like reading, so I am quite happy.

Just as he was about to take down the book, a man walked in and the man in the apron called him "boss"

I looked over... Sure enough, people are unlucky and cold water can get stuck between their teeth. This person is the one who heard me spit... Is this world so coincidental?

Thousands of grass mud horses in my heart began to gallop...

Probably the man in the apron was talking to that person, and that man looked over to me.what can I do?I can only laugh!

"What's your name?" That man...wrong.The boss asked me, so I had to answer seriously

"Ding Yuzhang"

"Where do you live?"

"XX District XX County"

"So far!?" He was surprised because I said my home address, not where I live now

"Aren't you a runaway kid?" He asked me again

"……no"

"Then why did you come from so far? Isn't it running away from home? Clothes... Well, although they are clean, they are tattered."

My rational line felt like it was about to break, "I'm going to school here now, I didn't run away from home, I'm sharing a room here, and my clothes...although they're old, they're not torn, right?"

He stared at me, I'm not used to it, I blinked and said: "Since you don't need me here, then I'll go first." I picked up my things and wanted to leave. This time, I screwed up myself.

"Hey, did I say no to you?"

The steps I was about to walk out of the door stopped because of his words, which just happened to poke me.

"Isn't it okay for the boss to ask the employees about things?"

"Sorry for the impoliteness." That's all I can say, who told me that he is my boss now.

"By the way, what did you mean by 'spit' just now?"

"...I'm not spitting on you" knew he would ask this

"A child, why are you so troubled?"

"..."

Even if you are just a child, you will have a lot of troubles because of some things you have experienced. Otherwise, there would be no such name as precocity. Isn’t it all because of seeing more things and thinking more?

=============== My nonsense dividing line =============

Why didn't you update it yesterday?It's just... Playing too... Hey... And then... Forgot, when I remembered, I was already going to sleep...

This chapter feels a bit painful, that is, Yu Yan found out that he fell in love with Shengjia. In fact, I think Yu Yan is a distressed child. He is really, really distressing. Did I forget to say that this is a friend? experience to change?Although there are really many changes in the front, I haven't changed the main places.

Feeling a bit difficult to pretend to be more aggressive? ?Then my neighbor's side story has been dragged on, I'm sorry (bow) However, something happened yesterday that I feel a little embarrassed...

recall--------

By the way, my aunt brought my cousin to my house yesterday, and brought my grandma who lives in my house to live with him for a few months. However, I spend most of my time on the bed. When I sleep, the computer will naturally be placed on the floor to charge. some type of.

However, I would stay in bed until [-] or [-] o’clock (morning) on ​​weekends, and my aunt would come into my room to see me, and when she saw the computer on the floor, she asked my mother why she put the computer on the floor

(My mother knows that I have written articles, and my mother saw me updating articles on the bed the day before, when my mother came in, I accidentally deleted all the articles I updated)

My mother told my aunt that I was writing a BL novel! ! ! ! ! !My mother... betrayed me, and I really felt in my heart that there were thousands of grass mud horses galloping ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ! ! ! ! ! ! !At any rate, remove the bl, okay...

The point is that my aunt and my cousin don't know what bl is, and my mother even educated my aunt about what bl is! ! !popular science! ! !Do you know what science means?have no idea?Please do your own research.

Later, my mother also said that she only knew what bl meant, and didn't know what lesbians were called... I silently added a sentence in the room, it was gl

God, Lu, I feel like my sanity line is broken...