i'm just a normal person

Daivdg Blanchflower, a professor of economics at Dartmouth College in the United States, came to such a conclusion on the topic of unhappiness and age——

In the case of controlling variables and even excluding the factors of marital status, happiness is the lowest in middle age.The reason for this comes from the fact that they have gradually adapted to their own strengths and weaknesses.

Because they find that they are unable to change the status quo and can only be forced to submit to reality, resulting in depression, discomfort, low self-esteem, panic, and loneliness. This cycle of repeated acceptance of facts and mental pressure is what leads to their sense of happiness. general decline.

Although I am not yet 50 or [-] years old, I have begun to experience this kind of life too early.

Maybe it's because I'm not too sensitive to emotional reactions, so I haven't really realized what it's like to be stuck until now.

Should this be misfortune or luck, no one can give me an answer.

It's Yokohama time now, 47:[-] p.m.

I've been hanging upside down from the ceiling for over 30 minutes.

It was a long and harsh torture.

The object of torture was not me alone, but our entire group.

This torture came too unexpectedly, the team members were all caught off guard, they were hung up without knowing what was going on, and they even forgot to resist.

There are traitors in our organization.However, the torturers had no definitive source of information to determine who this person was.In view of the fact that eliminating dissidents is also an important task in Hong Kong and black, the torture team headed by Koyo Ozaki, their method has become a simple and crude public torture of "rather killing a thousand mistakes than missing one".

Why public torture instead of direct interrogation one by one?

Because the Hong Kong gangster organization I belong to faces undercover agents from the government.

Government personnel all have a characteristic, especially young people. They can hold their breath, but they cannot match the sense of justice and kindness in their hearts.If they witnessed it with their own eyes, those group members who had laughed and scolded themselves would die for themselves one by one.And when those who wanted to survive desperately cried and begged to force the undercover to jump out and confess, even if the undercover knew that Hong Kong black people deserved to die, but when they chose the ending of "If you don't say anything, you will definitely die" , or choose the direction of "reducing sacrifices and only sacrificing themselves", their reason will eventually be overwhelmed by a strong sense of guilt and sensibility over time.

These remarks came from a young man. There was no trace of disgusting malice on his clear and fair face. The cold words blurted out loosely.

"So, let's make it public~"

Koyo Ozaki is in charge of the torture.

She directly pointed out why the young man wanted to tell his trap directly, so that the undercover would not hear it, but would he be more patient?

The young man said with a smile: "Since he was able to steal information about Hong Kong gangsters, it means that he is not a fool. Why I did this, even if I don't say it, he knows it himself. So, whether I say it or not, it doesn't actually have any effect. "

He paused, then continued: "Also, even if I don't know it, I'll point it out specifically to let the other party know that this is a trap and they have to jump into it. Isn't it more interesting?"

Ozaki Koye suddenly realized that the corners of his mouth twitched immediately: "...you are really wicked."

After receiving this comment, the young man became happier and his tone became more turbulent: "Can we start?"

……

Now that the timeline is back here, I have already passed through five or six people's tragic deaths, including knife wounds, shooting, burning, beating and suffocation.Although everyone was covered with black cloth bags to isolate the impact on the line of sight, it was precisely because of this unclear line of sight that they deepened their ability to perceive other senses and magnified people's inner fear.

Stacked with the wails of pain from other people in fear, the current situation can be compared to hell on earth.

"Ayanokouji Kiyotaka."

It's my turn.

Someone grabbed my waist and stabilized my unattached and swaying body when I was hanging upside down.

"15 years old, no father and no mother, orphan background, the time period to join Hong Kong and black is three weeks."

Listen to this voice, it is the group leader with me.He has been in Hong Kong and Heilongjiang for more than a year. Although he seldom talks to me, he is also a person who can take care of his subordinates. If he has food, he will share it with others.Because of the conflict between the foreign power organization mimic and Hong Kong gangsters, the domestic demand for Hong Kong gangsters has increased. The team leader saw that I was starving to death on the street, so he asked me if I would like to join Hong Kong gangsters for a meal.

It was during this time that I joined and became a grassroots member of the organization.

"This time, let's cut a hole on the top of his head first, and then ask slowly."

At this time, the voice was the young man who proposed to have a public trial.

I heard that he is the fastest person to become a cadre in this organization over the years.Some people say that this is because he is a popular figure in the Mori Ogai faction, so he was promoted quickly.But at the same time, apart from jealousy and envy, they also have to admit that this young man is truly from the dark world, and they are afraid of being targeted by him.

Looking at other people's death with a smile is just a part of everyday life for him.

He threw a dagger in front of the team leader standing next to me, and the dagger without the scabbard made a crisp "click" sound on the ground.

"Tear off the black cloth bag on his head, and put your hands on his forehead. Don't just cut off the outer skin, just for show."

The team leader picked up the dagger, hesitated for a moment, and said loudly: "He is still a newcomer, he has not learned anything, and the work he is doing is also the most basic work. He has no chance to get in touch with the core secrets of Hong Kong and black. He can't It's undercover."

"Are you teaching me how to do things? Or are you trying to tell me a bedtime story?"

There was a raised voice in the young man's voice, but every word was pieced together with a piercing chill.

"Hurry up, the people behind are still waiting. If you delay it and die before interrogation, it would be too wasteful."

Yes.

Generally speaking, if someone is hung upside down, he will die from cerebral hemorrhage within two to four hours.That's why when I was blindfolded with a black cloth bag, I started to time myself according to my heart rate.Because people who fall into darkness can easily blur the concept of time.

My hood is now ripped off, and the sudden light makes me close my eyes.Before I was familiar with Mingguang, the incandescent lamps inside the warehouse kept shining colorful halos in front of me, and then I saw the team leader showing an unbearable expression on my face.

sorry.

That's what he said.

I saw white light from the blade of the knife right in front of my eyes, and then my scalp became cold, and with the sound of blood dripping, the bleeding site was filled with burning sensation.

"Show me." The young man who had been sitting still asked the group leader to move out of the way, with a little disgust in his voice, "I want to see the flesh, not the blood, and cut deeper. Or, just me Do it yourself."

The young man pushed the group leader and told him to act quickly.

And I shook my head, repeating the mouth shape of "don't don't want" on my mouth.

The group leader stared at the defenseless young man's back, gritted his teeth, and stabbed the dagger at him.

In the next second, the blood foam was like flying flowers, splashing all over my body.

There was also needle-shaped blood on the ground.

The group leader turned around slowly, as if he wanted to see who did it with his own eyes.And his chest was directly pierced by a blade formed by black clothes.The black-haired young man has long used me as an umbrella to block the large swath of blood.

"Mr. Dazai, please don't expose yourself to danger." The person who spoke was a thin young man with white hair on his sideburns who had been following behind the young man named Dazai. He was very nervous, but because he saw Dazai's expressionless face Expression, he suppressed the tone at the end of the sentence.

Dazai showed his back to the group leader on purpose, I'm sure.

Because when he lowered his head to check my injury, his expression was expectant, the kind of expectation that good things would happen to him.At the same time, his expectation is also calm, with everything under control.

Can I assume that these are the bureaus he compiled.He already knew that the team leader was an undercover agent, but in order to make him think that he was trusted, Dazai didn't hang him up, but instead made him the operator.

Then, Dazai deliberately showed him his flaws, making the team leader think that there was an opportunity to take advantage of, and put all his eggs in one basket.

Being able to do such a high-risk thing, does this prove that he is a suicidal person as rumored.

The group leader fell down.

Osamu Dazai walked up to the thin young man, and slapped him clearly.

"Who made you appear here?"

Dazai gave another slap with his backhand.

"Who allowed you to do it? This is an opportunity to obtain intelligence from the government. You know how much time it took me to deliberately release fake news before I locked in this group with undercover agents. Your self-righteousness now completely ruined my plan .”

Koyo Ozaki seemed to be used to seeing Dazai lecture Akutagawa, so he calmly interjected, "Probably less than 24 hours?"

Akutagawa stood upright, accepting the beating with a sullen face.

The whole audience was solemn, and no one dared to say a word.

Dazai ignored the pale faces of everyone in the warehouse, picked up the jacket on the chair, and said to the low-level Hong Kong gangsters who were looking at each other in dismay, "I don't have to watch the show, and the actors are off, what should I do?" Just go and do something. What are you doing standing around while everyone hangs from the ceiling to dry?"

This is not a real drama, but a real killing.

In order to catch the undercover agent, Dazai took out five or six people as bait without any pain.

When I was put down, my head was a little dizzy.In fact, bloodletting on the head can help reduce the blood pressure caused by hemorrhage, but it can increase the possibility of survival.However, this will also bring new problems, that is, massive blood loss.Therefore, I feel that I need to stop the bleeding immediately.

However, Osamu Dazai stopped walking as he walked out as if he remembered a question.

If he hadn't left, everyone would naturally not dare to leave, or even dare to move.

His eyes passed through the crowd, caught my sight directly, walked in front of me, stared into my eyes condescendingly and said: "By the way, Ayanokouji-kun, when you said no, your expression was a bit fake. You, really Afraid of death?"

"...I'm just not good at making expressions." I maintained my expressionless face, I probably belong to the kind of facial paralysis, I can't make an expression of great joy and sorrow, "I'm really afraid of death."

"Oh." Dazai responded meaningfully, half bent over, pressed his cold fingers on my carotid artery, and continued to smile, "I thought, you must know that you won't die?"

"..."

Osamu Dazai squinted his eyes and was as friendly as a neighbor's friend, but the words in his mouth were still sharp: "It looks very similar. Especially when Akutagawa came here suddenly, I began to wonder if there are many undercover agents." , I am afraid that my teammates will leak too much, so I want to sell my teammates to save my life. Moreover, this undercover agent is very smart, so smart that he can grasp the characteristics of key people and manipulate them."

I hear me say, so shall we have another interrogation?Want to catch undercover?

Osamu Dazai's Tobitomi looked into my eyes, inspected it for more than ten seconds, and finally let go of his hand, and instructed other grassroots personnel to move their eyes to the team leader's body, and said: "Turn over the entire undercover residence. Come out, don't miss a single glass, and find all the clues for me."

People's expressions can sometimes be deceiving, but the heartbeat is not easy to deceive.

My heartbeat has never been disturbed by his words, it has always been stable.

Even if he really guessed right, including the team leader's plan to murder Dazai, and my plan to let Akutagawa, who is prone to lose his mind when meeting Dazai, come here to break Dazai's plan.He guessed all these steps correctly.But what he didn't know was that the team leader didn't even know that I was an undercover agent.This major premise is wrong, so his inference has already shifted.

Therefore, he followed the clues, and the undercover agent he finally found must not be me.

Then why should I design our group leader?

This has to mention my plan to enter Hong Kong as an undercover agent.

Of course, the most important thing is that as an undercover agent, I am only a relatively ordinary one, so I can only do this.

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