Find him in the crowd

Chu Zifan was talking about the recording all the way, and as soon as the car stopped, Xiang Sixi ran away as if fleeing, without waiting for Chu Zifan.Chu Zifan was not annoyed, he followed behind with his trophy in his arms, and even picked up today's courier when he passed the newspaper box.The elevator hadn't arrived yet, so Xiang Si Xizai had to wait for him.

"There is your courier."

Thin, it should be documents related to work or the like.

Xiang Sixi opened it, and there were tickets for the concert and a brochure.There are many New Year's concerts, and Xiang Sixi was worried about which one to go to, but it turned out that the concerts were full.There are no seats at all.Later, I scrolled down one by one, and I booked when I saw that there were vacancies, but I didn't pay attention to the theme and time.He showed Chu Zifan the date. "Do you have time today?"

Chu Zifan's eyes lit up when he saw the ticket, and if he had the tail at this moment, he would probably wag his tail, "Yes, yes!" If there is no time, create time and go!

Ever since he fell asleep at the Xiangsi Xiza concert last time, Chu Zifan always thought that he didn’t like to listen to concerts, so he always went with friends or colleagues, sometimes even by himself, not to mention how miserable it was .

Chu Zifan held the ticket like a treasure, and refused to let go. He watched it several times, until he got on the elevator, and suddenly asked Xiang Sixi, "Why did you buy this concert?"

"Is there any problem?" Xiang Sixi thought he didn't like it. "Everything else is full, only this one has vacancies. If you don't like it, I will return it and see if there are others."

Chu Zifan quickly explained, "I don't like it."

This is a small personal concert, the composer is Xie Qiao.

"This composer was quite famous abroad. I even bought his music CD when I was in school. I heard that it was because his mother passed away. He returned to China because he was too sad, and then disappeared. It has been several years. I didn't expect him to hold a concert again."

"That's quite a coincidence."

Xiang Sixi flipped through the concert brochure, and the introduction of the composer only included his name, graduate school, awards he had received, and some works.

"He gave concerts before?" Xiang Sixi asked.

"Well, in the United States, there were Chinese students from the same school who went to listen to it. The response was not bad. It's also the theme of 'Dreams Have Never Came to Xieqiao', and the cover has not changed."

The cover of the brochure is pure black, with a lily painted on it, without redundant words.Opening the first page is the theme of the concert, but it is not "Meng Ye He Went to Xieqiao" but "I am waiting for Qingming."

"Uh..." Chu Zifan closed the manual, "Maybe he changed his name this time."

"But for the concert approaching the New Year, choosing this name..." Xiang Sixi thought for a while, "Probably has another purpose."

"But his music is very nice." Chu Zifan seemed to think of something, "Go back and play it for you."

"it is good."

Xiang Sixi likes to listen to Chu Zifan playing the piano very much.Sitting in front of the piano, he was intoxicated in the music, and his earnest and concentrated appearance was really charming. From time to time, he looked up at Xiang Sixi and smiled, disturbing his mind.I don't want to listen to the piano at all.

"Play it again."

……

Chu Zifan played it again.

Xiang Sixi listened carefully this time, "I think I should have heard this tune somewhere."

"I played this song when you were sick last time. You should have an impression."

Xiang Sixi recalled it carefully, then shook his head, "Play it again, it's the middle part."

Chu Zifan played the melody in the middle several times.Xiang Sixi pointed to the lily in the handbook and said, "This is the melody. I remember when I was still in school in the village, a teacher always played this part on the guitar. That teacher was Li Qingming."

People in the mountains don't quite understand the usefulness of studying, and those who spend money and time don't know what to do when they come out.However, free schooling in the village can only go to junior high school graduation. Parents will plan in advance, and arrange for the children at home to go to the city to work early, or get married and have children.Knowing how to read and count money is enough.

This winter, among those in the class who were still persistent, counting Xiang Sixi, there were only 5 people left.

Teacher Li was very anxious and went to the students' homes to persuade the adults to let the children complete their studies.Xiang Sixi also went with the teacher, mainly to help the teacher lead the way.He doesn't understand the teacher's anxiety very well. In fact, he thinks it's good to work early and get married. Many people in the village come here like this.

Of course, he was going to college.

The teacher was talking to Pan Jiaojiao's mother about the necessity of going to school.Xiang Sixi sat aside and listened quietly, only feeling that every word the teacher said made sense.But Pan Jiaojiao's mother was a little impatient.

"If you can pay for our tuition, let her go. The rest is useless."

This time the teacher was speechless.

The teachers themselves don’t have enough to eat or wear warmly. Many school textbooks and teaching aids are bought by the teachers in a frugal way. How can they have money to pay the tuition fees for the students?

Pan Jiaojiao's father glanced at the teacher from time to time while smoking a dry cigarette, but he didn't say a word from the beginning to the end.

Pan Jiaojiao was washing clothes in the yard, chopping firewood, and going back and forth outside the window was only her movement.

But no one spoke in the room, and there was a stalemate, so Xiang Sixi and the teacher left helplessly.

As soon as the door opened, Pan Jiaojiao dropped the work she was doing and watched them leave.His eyes were longing and desperate, and finally entered the room amidst his father's reprimand.

Li Qingming lived in the staff dormitory of the school. The dormitory was damp and not ventilated, but he kept it very clean.On the wall next to the bed hangs the acoustic guitar that he often plays for his students.There is a pot of flowers at the foot of the bed, the flowering period has not yet arrived, Xiang Sixi can't tell what kind of flower it is.

Li Qingming poured him a glass of water.

"Thank you today for walking with me for so long."

"It's okay. Teacher, even if they don't come, I will always come to school. You will always have me as a student"

Li Qingming shook his head with a smile.

"Of course you want to come, and you still have to go to university, the best university."

For students, getting the teacher's approval is something to show off.

"En!" Xiang Sixi nodded happily, "Then teacher, what is the best university?"

Li Qingming "In my heart, Yanda University should be the best university."

"Okay. Then I will take the Yanda exam in the future!"

There is only one table in the room, which is used as both a dining table and a desk. The wood has become uneven due to damp for a long time. Li Qingming put a glass plate on it.There are photos on the bottom, there are photos when I graduated from elementary school with my students, and Xiang Sixi is also in it.There are photos of him standing at the gate of Yan Gate.There is also a group photo with his friends. The teacher in the photo doesn't have long hair, he should be seventeen or eighteen years old, and the brows are full of youth.There is also a picture of Li Qingming with his arms on the piano and his friend sitting. They are not looking at the camera, but at each other. The sun is just right.Side by side with this photo is a card with a white lily drawn on solid black paper.

"Did you draw this?"

Li Qingming looked at the card he was pointing at.

"Well, I specially asked the old painter of the neighbor to teach me, and it took me several days to finish the painting."

"Is this a lily?"

Xiang Sixi has only seen lilies in books, which are flowers that symbolize nobility and elegance.

"Yes." Li Qingming stretched out his palm and compared, "It can probably be opened this big, and it is very fragrant."

"It turns out that the teacher likes lilies."

He always thought that it was a flower that girls like.

"My lover likes it."

For some reason, Xiang Sixi felt that this sentence came out of the teacher's mouth like a poem.A poem full of affection and love.It can be said that at this moment, people must imagine the appearance of their lover in their hearts, it must be the most beautiful appearance in their hearts, and the things loved by their lovers, no matter how ordinary they are, have become the most unique treasures in the world at this moment.

It's a pity that "my wife likes it" is always said to others.

Later, Xiang Sixi would occasionally think of the teacher's smile and expression at that moment, and he thought, that's probably what love looks like.

"So teacher, do you like lilies too?"

"Yes, but I like another kind of lily." Li Qingming pointed to the mandarin flower with only leaves left at the foot of the bed. "That is also a lily, but it has no fragrance and cannot bloom as big. But I like it very much." .”

That was when Li Qingming first came to this mountain village, he saw a flower on the edge of the cliff, a wild lily.He was pleasantly surprised that lilies could also be seen here, swaying from side to side when blown on the edge of the cliff, the dazzling orange color looked rustic.So he planted this rustic flower in his own flower pot.

"When it blooms next year, I will keep two for you, which can bloom for several days in a bottle."

"Row."

In the spring of the following year, the teacher really cut two lilies for him.He kept it in a plastic bottle, put it on the window sill, watched the flowers do their homework, cut the roots of the flowers and changed the water every day, and it took two weeks to bloom.

Looking at the flower, Xiang Sixi suddenly thought of Pan Jiaojiao.She always works in the fields with her parents barefoot, her hair is messy and has no time to take care of it, her skin is tanned, and she shows two rows of big white teeth when she smiles. She always loves to smile.

Her younger brother is still too young, so he has to go back to work when the family is busy farming, and Xiang Sixi will bring today's notes to her when he passes by her family's field.She would wipe her muddy hands clean and put her notes in a vegetable basket wrapped in a towel.He smiled and said thank you to Xiang Sixi.

When she smiles, she looks like these two wild lilies, full of vitality and sunshine.

Xiang Sixi never saw Pan Jiaojiao again.On the day she was married away, she was busy with schoolwork at school, and it was said that the man drove a pickup truck to pick her up, and gave her a lot of bride price, which was very beautiful.

But he always remembered the longing and desperate eyes of that smiling girl.I don't know if it can be replaced by such a scenery.

Xiang Sixi was admitted to a high school in the county, where he could live on campus. As a poor student, the school exempted him from tuition fees, and his family was very happy.

The schools in the county town have subsidy quotas for poor students, which he didn't know before, and it was Mr. Li who helped him find out and went through the procedures for him.Apart from him and Sun Cheng, there is another classmate in the class, and now they all have lessons.

In order to express her gratitude, during the summer vacation, my mother asked Xiang Sixi to deliver meals to Teacher Li almost every day.Teacher Li's dormitory is only one big room, and it is inconvenient to cook with a small stove every day.Li Qingming was very happy that someone brought food to him, so even if Xiang Sixi felt that his family's food could not be sold, he was very happy to eat.

"When you go to school, no one will bring me food anymore."

Li Qingming regretted while eating the noodles Xiang Sixi sent.

"I haven't gotten tired of eating it for two months." Xiang Sixi grew up eating her mother's cooking, and after eating it for more than ten years, it still tastes the same.But——"My mother's pickled cabbage is delicious, and I'll bring you some when winter comes."

"I'm never polite about eating." He is a single man who lives with a small stove, and his only requirement for cooking is "make the raw ones mature." tasty.

"Where's your guitar?"

Xiang Sixi was thinking that he might not hear the teacher playing the guitar when he went to school, but when he turned his head, he found that there was only a single nail left on the wall where the guitar was hanging.

"sold."

Li Qingming washed the bowl and put it in Xiang Sixi's small box.

"Why did you sell it? Is he broken?" Xiang Sixi asked.

Li Qingming looked at the empty wall, feeling lost, "It's not broken, there is something more important than the guitar."

"It's a pity I can't hear you play the guitar."

"Stop playing the guitar, let me tell you a story."

"Okay."

In order to save electricity at Xiang Sixi's house, his mother didn't let him turn on the fan. Every time Li Qingming came here, he always wanted to stay a little longer to blow on his fan.There is nothing better than a story to listen to.

"Tell a story about a musician and a poet. A musician and a poet are a pair of lovers. They met and fell in love at the best age. Behind the back of their families, they did many stupid things together, the kind of teenagers can do It was a stupid thing. At that time they agreed that in the future, one would compose music and one would write lyrics, so that their music would spread all over the world. For this reason, the musician went abroad to study. Originally, the poet had made an appointment with him to go abroad to study together. Separated. But . . . the poet missed his appointment."

Xiang Sixi waited for a long time but did not reply. "Then what happened next?"

"No more. They haven't seen each other since."

"Then why did the poet miss the appointment? Did the musician come back to find him? Aren't they lovers?"

Children always have many problems when listening to stories.There is always more desire for the ending than the process.

"There are so many buts." Li Qingming held his shoulders. "There are so many happy endings. There are so many stories in this world that end without a problem."

Xiang Sixi was a little disgusted, "What kind of story is this? It has no beginning and no end, and it's not good at all."

Unexpectedly getting such an evaluation, Li Qingming scratched his nose to cover up his embarrassment.

Once loved and hated, dreamed back at midnight, when we met again, I was full of words.After listening to endless explanations, there was only a tear-soaked pillow left after dawn.But when I really uttered these thousands of words, it became a dry tone again.To untie the bell, the person who tied it has to be tied, and the real heart knot never needs to be told to outsiders.

"If I told a story, I would tell it better than you." Xiang Sixi didn't know what Li Qingming was thinking, and he refused to let go of this endless story.

Li Qingming smiled and said, "Then I'll wait for you to write a better story."

Xiang Sixi patted his chest and said, "What's the problem?"

Later, Xiang Sixi became a screenwriter and really wrote many better stories than Li Qingming.It's a pity that Li Qingming will never see it again.

Xiang Sixi learned of Li Qingming's death only after returning home during the winter vacation.

He went to the city to buy textbooks. On the way back, the tractor turned over the cliff, and even his body was not found, only a few soaked textbooks were retrieved.It was a new textbook he had sold his guitar for.

Many years later, Xiang Sixi realized how precious that guitar was to the teacher.And he, after all, went with regrets.

A monument was erected in the village where he fell to commemorate his ten years of teaching here.

When the villagers mentioned this teacher again, they all said that he was just driven away by someone, could not come back, and continued to wander.

Xiang Sixi planted his favorite wild lily next to his tombstone, hoping that one day, he could see this flower, find his way back and stop wandering.

Chu Zifan rubbed his chin and said, "So you think that Xie Qiao's 'Qingming' is your teacher?"

"Guess." Xiang Sixi tapped the edge of the piano with his fingertips. "When Mr. Li taught us, he always said that he was a wandering poet, and this Xie Qiao was a musician who returned from studying abroad. What the teacher said should be theirs. thing."

Chu Zifan flipped through the booklet in his hand, "It seems that you and this teacher are really destined."

"If Xie Qiao is really that musician, then this is probably the only thing I can do for the teacher. Anyway, we are going to the concert, and then we will go backstage to meet him. If he is really looking for Teacher Li, maybe we ..." Xiang Sixi felt a little embarrassed again, "I can only bring him bad news."

"Bad news is better than random searches."

"Not necessarily." Xiang Sixi retorted, "There is always a glimmer of hope in searching, but if you know that the person you are looking for is no longer there, will you fall into despair."

"But looking for someone is nothing more than these two results. The person is still there, or he is no longer there. It is impossible to even have this awareness."

Xiang Sixi was a little confused, "Let's talk about it when we see someone."

On the day of the concert, the first snow of this winter finally fell.As the New Year approaches, the streets and alleys are decorated with festive decorations. In this snowy day, it really feels like the New Year is coming.

The latest Spring Festival travel news and headlines every year are displayed on the phone.Xiang Sixi babbled to Chu Zifan about the people and things she encountered on the Spring Festival travel train. She thought it was not worth mentioning and would be wiped out by time, but when she said it, she found that even the details that she hadn’t paid attention to I remember them all clearly, but without the resentment at that time, it has become an interesting story now.As time goes by, people will become tolerant.Anyway, he hadn't taken a train for a long time.

Xiang Sixi booked her air ticket in advance, and it took only 10 minutes to get home after getting off the plane. She didn't have to wait for several buses to go back and forth, which was much more convenient.But he was spending less and less time at home.

Chu Zifan said, "I will accompany you back in the future, and I will go back as soon as I have time."

The concert begins.

The performance orchestra is a student orchestra of a music school. It lasts 90 minutes, and it is rare for Xiang Sixi to listen to the whole audience.He has heard most of the melodies played, on the playground, outside the classroom, and under the sound of Teacher Li's guitar.What is played by the band is a completely different taste.

After the concert, they went to the backstage holding the lilies they had ordered in advance.The backstage orchestra and staff are taking photos to celebrate, and the atmosphere is very joyous.Xiang Sixi was waiting in the lounge, very uneasy.Xie Qiao pushed the door open until the sound of jubilation outside gradually died down.

"Sorry to keep you waiting. I'm Xie Qiao."

Xie Qiao is about forty years old, and his temples are a little gray. The first time they met, Xiang Sixi recalled the photo Li Qingming pressed under the glass plate that he thought was a photo with a friend. Even though he was much older, he could still be with Zhang The juveniles on the film overlap.

Chu Zifan handed over their business cards.

"I was honored to listen to your music when I was studying abroad, and it is an honor to come to your concert."

Xie Qiao took the business card and looked at it. After being surprised, he returned to normal, "Hello, Mr. Chu, a famous music producer. It should be me who is honored."

Turning to Xiang Sixi again, "Hello, Writer Xiang, I've heard about you for a long time, and I'm glad to meet you."

"You're too much, it's just a false name." Xiang Sixi sent her own flowers, "I heard that you like lilies very much."

"Thank you. In fact, my mother likes lilies. Later, people misunderstood that I like lilies, and I also liked them for decades by mistake."

Xiang Sixi sighed inwardly, and looked at Chu Zifan.

"To be honest, we didn't just come to the concert today. Do you know a man named Li Qingming?"

Hearing this, the politeness and politeness on Xie Qiao's face disappeared instantly, "You know Qingming? Who are you? Where is he? Is he okay?"

Seeing his excited state, Xiang Sixi couldn't bear to speak.It was Chu Zifan who said, "Sorry, I'm afraid we can't bring you good news."

Xie Qiao was stunned for a moment, and when he understood what Chu Zifan meant, he seemed to want to smile, the corner of his mouth twitched, and tears rolled out of his eyes first.

Chu Zifan also panicked, "I'm sorry, we see that you are looking for him, but just want to tell you his whereabouts..."

"I'm sorry, I lost my temper." Xie Qiao sat on the sofa and wiped his tears. "I've thought about this result since I was here, but I didn't expect it to come."

"He is my teacher. He told me that his lover likes lilies. He often plays your music for us on the guitar. He sincerely helps each of his students. He is a very good teacher."

Xiang Sixi wrote down an address for him.

"Here's his tombstone. Maybe you'll find some of his remains." Like, the photo under the glass.

"Thank you...thank you..."

Later, Xie Qiao said that he wanted to be alone, Xiang Sixi and Chu Zifan asked the staff waiting outside the door before leaving.

The snow is getting bigger and bigger, and a thin layer has accumulated on the ground, and the footprints that have been stepped on all the way have not melted. According to this situation, we can probably build a snowman tomorrow.

The two were wearing black coats of different styles, with a few snowflakes hanging on their shoulders. Xiang Sixi wrapped the scarf tightly, and Chu Zifan took his hand and stuffed it into his pocket.No one spoke, snowflakes fell all over their heads silently.