less than seven years

Since then, Yu Jie no longer eats with me, and spends almost every day with the man of liberal arts. Occasionally, when I meet them on the road, I will make a detour or chat with my classmates, pretending not to see them.She did the same, pretending not to see it.

Once in the evening, when I came out of the teaching building, it was raining lightly, and I didn't bring an umbrella, so I could only trot back along the wall half covered.I looked up and saw Yu Jie walking towards me with an umbrella. The umbrella covered her face at the time, but I still recognized her.I subconsciously wanted to avoid it, but it was too obvious, so I could only bite the bullet and walk forward, thinking in my heart how to say hello.

When passing by, she didn't look at me, she just gave way to the side a little bit, and walked past like this, pretending that I didn't exist.

Going back to school from home during the monthly vacation, as soon as I got out of the car, I saw Yu Jie and the liberal arts man coming out of the school gate, and the liberal arts male was about to take a taxi.

They both saw me, and the Wenke man touched Yu Jie's arm and said something to her, but she didn't speak or look at me, the two of them waited on the side of the road for a while, then got in the car and left.

Xiaolu realized that there was a conflict between Yu Jie and me, and she wanted to mediate it, so she often found opportunities to ask Yu Jie and me at the same time. At first, I just thought she had no intentions, but later, I refused directly and made excuses. don't go.

On the night after the final exam, we usually had a good time and a group of classmates went out to play together, thinking that Yu Jie had already been asked out by a liberal arts man and would not be there, so I agreed.But when we went to the store, Yu Jie sat there and chatted with her classmates, not with the liberal arts man.

When she saw me, she didn't say hello, and continued to chat with other students about their topics.Xiaolu pulled me to sit next to Yu Jie. There were a lot of people, so I just sat down and didn't show anything.

Everyone was playing high that night, a few boys kept trying to persuade them to drink, I accompanied the whole process, and Yu Jie also drank, but I knew that she would be allergic to drinking too much, so I snatched it several times to help her drink up.

After eating and drinking enough, everyone is going to move to KTV. A few students went to book a private room first, and we went behind.Yu Jie ran to the toilet to vomit, vomited out all the wine she drank, said she had a headache, and kept leaning against the toilet door, unable to move.

I said: "Let's go, go out first, and take you to buy medicine."

She didn't say no, and she didn't agree, she just looked at me like this, her eyes were full of drunkenness.I asked Xiaolu to help Yu Jie with her backpack. I supported her waist and walked out of the shop.

We walked all over the area until we finally found a pharmacy, and after taking the medicine, she felt better.But I still kept the posture of me hugging her. She didn't intend to get up, and I didn't intend to let go. Holding her like this, I suddenly felt like crying.

We played until it was almost dawn before we went to the hotel to open a room to rest. The six of us girls had a three-person room, and the two of us shared a bed. Yu Jie and I were together.

It was about nine o'clock when my mother called to ask me when I would be home. After hanging up the phone, she found that Yu Jie had woken up, lying on her side, looking at me.The other four were still sleeping soundly, snoring lightly.

I said in a very soft voice: "Go to sleep for a while, or your head will hurt."

She hummed, still looking at me.

She said, "Yang Fan, do you hate me?"

I said, "No."

She said, "Then do you like me?"

I don't know what kind of liking she is talking about. Since she has a boyfriend, I think she should mean whether I like her or not as a good friend.

I said: "Yeah."

She said: "Then why don't you stop me when I fall in love."

I panicked for a moment and didn't dare to look her in the eyes, but I started to cry again. Like the way she hugged me before, I hugged her gently and said:

"It's different that you like him and I like you."

The last few months before the college entrance examination are the hardest time. The several midnight study rooms opened by the school are full every night.

Since returning to school during the winter vacation, for some reason, Yu Jie's contact with the liberal arts man has gradually decreased, and in the end, they have not been seen together again.

Yu Jie would often study with me as before, and we were usually the last ones to leave the study room.

Once, several of our class committee members were called by the head teacher to hold a meeting after self-study. Usually we go to study at 09:30 in the evening. We drove until almost eleven o’clock that day. After the end, we went to have some supper with our classmates. That night, I didn't go to the study room again, and went back to the dormitory directly.

When I was about to take a bath, it started to rain heavily outside, with strong winds, thunder, and lightning bolts, and several girls were scared to cry.I knew that Yu Jie was very afraid of lightning and thunder. I ran to their dormitory and found that she was not there. My classmates said she was in the study room. I quickly took an umbrella and ran to the study room in the wind and rain.

At that time, the whole school had a power outage, and many people with umbrellas rushed back to the dormitory together. It would be scary to stay outside the dormitory.

When I arrived at the study room, only seven or eight people were still there. I looked for it with a flashlight. Yu Jie sat in the middle of the classroom, covering her ears.

I went over and held her hand, it was cold.She was wearing canvas shoes, I gave her the umbrella and said:

"Go, carry you back."

She was lying on my back, holding the umbrella tightly in fear, shaking all over her body.At that time, it was raining heavily, and all the nearby trees seemed to be blown off, tearing the branches frantically, and the water on the ground accumulated up to my ankles.

About a month before the college entrance examination, the school held another mobilization meeting. At this time, most people's grades were basically fixed, and it was difficult to improve much. After returning, they all had their own worries and were unhappy.

Yu Jie said, let's sit on the roof.

The two of us sat on a concrete eaves, looking at the buildings with lights on the opposite side of the school, there were so many stars in the sky, and the wind was blowing over, suddenly felt that parting was approaching, so sad .

Yu Jie hugged her knees and said, "Do you still remember what the two of us said before we went to Shanghai?"

Well, I nodded, "I want to design a lot of buildings, and then you will be responsible for the decoration, and sell them to rich people, and then we will go camping by the river every day."

She smiled: "What a beautiful wish."

I looked at her and said, "Do you think this wish can come true?"

She shook her head and said, "Yang Fan, we can't go to Shanghai."

I said, "No, it's definitely possible."

The night before the college entrance examination, I had a stomachache and vomited into the hospital. I didn't go back to the dormitory until it was almost twelve o'clock.I found a box of yogurt on the bed. The roommate said it was delivered by Yu Jie, and there was a small note for cheering, which read:

"Come on for the college entrance examination, I believe in you."

On the night after the exam, our class baked a small bar outside and had a breakup meal. Everyone cried badly and got drunk.All the students, no matter whether they were ordinary or not, all hugged each other indiscriminately, crying, crying, crying.

Yu Jie was so drunk that she couldn't even stand up, she pulled me over with snot and tears, two people fell to the ground, I don't know who was crushed, in short, many people sat on the ground, crying and drinking all kinds of things .

Yu Jie hugged my neck, wiped her snot and tears onto my clothes, and couldn't speak well.

She said: "Yang Fan, you must not forget me in the future!"

I hugged her, suppressed the tears that were about to burst out, and nodded vigorously, "Mmm! No!"

There are classmates singing on the stage, singing "A friend has never been alone, you will understand..."

All the people present, including the teacher, burst into tears again, singing along without words or sentences in a heavy cry.Suddenly at that moment, I realized that there are many people who may not have the opportunity to see each other again after this separation.Those who hated, disliked, liked, and admired will never stay by my side again.

I hugged Yu Jie tightly, couldn't help but finally cried too.

At that time, my mind was full of "Yu Jie will belong to others in the future", "Who will go camping with me when I go to Shanghai in the future, who will help me decorate the house?", "Yu Jie cannot belong to others, it can only be mine. of".

Thinking like this, I no longer want to restrain myself, anyway, after tonight, everyone who wants to leave will leave.

I cupped her face and kissed her hard on the lips.The scene was chaotic at the time, with all kinds of hoarse shouts, cries, laughter, the sound of glasses colliding, the noise of microphones hitting the ground, and the sound of various soda cans being pushed down.

I don't remember what she looked like at that time, I only know that the kiss was salty.In the end, the two of us hugged, continued, and kept crying, and kept crying, and the tears couldn't be broken at all.

Later, when the grades came out, she did worse than usual in the exam, and she almost got a copy.And I was still almost the same as the mock exam.

Later, we went to different cities and went to different universities.Neither of us went to Shanghai. The "Shanghai Dream" we talked about at the beginning is just a dream until now.

The kiss on the night of the break-up meal was like an unintentional fight between children. Afterwards, no one took it seriously.Perhaps, I dare not take it seriously.

For a long time, neither Yu Jie nor I mentioned the topic of "together". We both thought that our relationship was just friendship.It wasn't until that day that I realized that we were not friendship, not love, let alone family.

When I went to university, various associations, student unions, studies, and part-time jobs all filled my life. When I got busy, I almost forgot about Yu Jie.

In the first six months, the two of us made phone calls and sent messages every now and then to check on our respective lives.

I learned sporadically that she is still the top girl in their grade. I have seen the photos she posted, and she is getting more and more beautiful, more temperamental and feminine than before, and she is no longer the bad-tempered eldest lady at that time.

Once on a long vacation, she came to my place to look for me. When I picked her up at the train station, she found that she had changed a lot. What she saw in the photos was far less shocking than what she saw with her own eyes.

I took her luggage, and when she came up, she hugged me around my neck, and the fragrance on her body drowned me, and she said, "Yang Fan, I miss you so much!"

At that time, I also had long hair, almost reaching my shoulders, and she kept messing with my hair, feeling:

"Why do you have long hair, you can't scratch it like before!"

I smile.

I took her shopping for three days, ate delicious food, had fun, and took a lot of photos.

On the bus back to the hotel, she leaned on my shoulder and said:

"Yang Fan, do you know? In the year we've been apart, I really want to see you. Talking on the phone doesn't count, and sending text messages doesn't count. I just think, like in high school, we can eat together every day and go to class together. I will forget to bring my umbrella when it rains, and I miss you very much at that time, because no matter what, you will come to pick me up, I know, you will always be there, and you will not abandon me.

"Seeing those photos you posted, they are all places and people I don't know, and you are different from before, I feel so strange, as if everything is not real.

"I often think, I must come to you, see the city you are in, walk the road you have traveled, and see the scenery you have seen, so that I can feel that you are by my side."

She leaned against me, and I looked out the window, just listening to what she said without answering.

If it was before, I would definitely say, I am here, I have always been here, I promised you that I will not forget you, we still have our own "Shanghai Dream", come on, let's realize it together.

But what a naive thing to do.

The first day she came to see me, I knew that she had already started dating a boyfriend in college. She was also a boy majoring in liberal arts. It was said that she was handsome, tall, and could play basketball.

So, when she told me these things, I couldn't figure out what she was thinking. I didn't know her, I never did.If she is so dependent on me just because I treat her well, then I would rather not.

When we went back, she was on the train at [-] o'clock in the middle of the night. We were sitting in the waiting room, and the TV in the hall kept playing several advertisements in a loop, which was annoying to hear.

I have been telling her to take good care of her finances and pay attention to safety, and I didn't say that I would miss her or anything like that.She listened to me nagging, her eyes were red.

I said, "Why are you so sad? It's not like I'll never see you again. If you have time in the future, you can still make an appointment when you get home."

She covered her mouth and nodded vigorously.

When the bus arrived, I watched her follow the crowd into the station entrance, and I didn't leave until the waiting room was empty.I was sitting on the bus from the train station to school, and I received a text message from her, she wrote:

"Yang Fan, the train is leaving, I will miss you."

I stared at these words and read them back and forth many times before replying to her:

"Okay, safe travels."

After replying, all her messages were deleted.I know that some things, no matter how much I care about them, will no longer develop according to my mind.

In fact, after that time, our contact was not as frequent as before.I don't call her often anymore because I don't want to disturb her life.Our contact is limited to occasionally sending a text message to greet each other, or commenting and replying to each other online.Until later, I learned more about her from my classmates.

Xiaolu didn't get into the school he wanted back then, so he studied for a year, and later became Yu Jie's direct junior.Most of our old classmates went to her school entrance banquet, and everyone has changed a lot.

It's been a long time since we saw each other. Everyone is very interested in the relationship between me and Yu Jie. I ate food and drank with my classmates to catch up on the old days, but I didn't answer the conversation.Yu Jie joked:

"We've been together!"

Later Xiaolu asked me secretly, "Are you and Yu Jie really together?"

When I was in high school, Xiaolu had already seen that Yu Jie and I had an unusual relationship. Later, when she questioned me, I only told her that I liked Yu Jie very much, but Yu Jie only regarded me as a friend.After the college entrance examination was over, she saw the scene where we kissed each other, so she decided that I would be with Yu Jie.Now that I ask this question, I think it is very funny, life will slap you in the face at any time.

I said: "Nonsense, nonsense, just friends, just like me and you, you know? Yu Jie has a boyfriend, it's okay to tell me, but don't talk nonsense with other people, it's okay if you misunderstand good."

Knowing that he said something wrong, Xiaolu just agreed and didn't ask any more questions.

In the third year, our majors were assigned to several construction sites for internships for a period of three months.At that time, we were living in a remote village, and the only entertainment we had every day was drinking and fisting with shirtless men after work was over. At that time, my addiction to cigarettes and alcohol was out of control.

The signal there is not very good, and you have to climb a mountain near the station to make a call.Just when the internship was about to end, I received a call from Yu Jie.

She was crying all the time, and she could hear the voice intermittently on the phone. She didn't know what she was talking about at all. After a long time of comforting, she finally calmed down, and finally told me that she broke up with her boyfriend, she was very sad, and now she misses me very much.

I sat on a big rock that had been baked by the sun until it could burn my ass, lit a cigarette, and smoked one by one. Finally, when she finished crying, the cigarette case was empty, and cigarette butts piled up at her feet.

I picked up all the cigarette butts, put them in the cigarette case, and put them away.

I said: "Okay, don't be sad anymore, eat well, sleep well, I will see you in two days."

That night, I tossed and turned and couldn't sleep, thinking a lot.

The first time I heard her name was when the boys in the class were discussing who was the prettiest. They said it was Yu Jie from a certain class. I noticed that because there were not many girls with "Jie" in their names at that time. Most of the characters are Juan, Na, Ting or something.A special name is naturally easy to attract attention.

The first time I saw her in person, she was the lead dancer of the dance team. After I announced the curtain, I turned around and saw her wearing a long white skirt, Shi Shiran walking towards me.At first glance, she was amazed.

Later, after getting to know her slowly, I realized that she is actually a nice person, but she is more indifferent to strangers.

She is not afraid of cockroaches or mice, but she is afraid of chickens. It is said that she was pecked at the calf by chickens when she was a child.She suffers from allergies every year for various reasons, and it is impossible to hide.She also doesn't like eating tomatoes, saying it has a fishy smell.

There are still many details, which flashed back and forth in my mind. It turns out that after so many years, even if it is not love, I still care about it.

Early the next morning, I took two days off and hurried out of the mountain from the construction site by car, then took the car, then caught the train, and went to Yu Jie's school.At that time, it was only about a week to finish the internship. The foreman at the construction site saw that I had been working hard, but he turned a blind eye and turned a blind eye, telling me to go back as soon as I finished.

Xiaolu picked me up at the school gate, and she took me to a room in the school’s guest house, washed and rested for a while, and it was probably time for late school, so she called Yu Jie and asked her to go to the commercial hall behind the school. street food.Did not say I came, because I wanted to surprise her.

After waiting for a long time for Yu Jie to come, I thought she would be very happy to see me, but looking at her expression, she was obviously frightened.I had exactly the same reaction as hers.Because she came with a boy.

After finishing the meal in embarrassment, the boy offered to pay the bill. I didn't grab it, which just saved the money.Later, the boy left first, and before he left, he was worried and told Yu Jie not to go back too late, and to be happier.

I get it, it's a new boyfriend.

I didn't let the path go, and she kept walking behind us.Yu Jie wanted to explain to me, I smiled and said:

"Don't be so nervous. I happen to be free, so I came over to have fun, and I also took a look at Xiaolu. Her birthday is two days old, so help her celebrate in advance."

Yu Jie hesitated to speak, which made me feel like I was being tricked again, and my eyes began to feel a little acidic.

She said, "Yang Fan, do you think I'm bad?"

I said, "No, no."

"Sorry, I need someone to be with me," she said.

I said, "No need to apologize, although it's the first time I met that boy, I feel that he is very nice, as long as he treats you well."

Originally, I was on the train the next morning, but then I changed my ticket directly that night and hurried back to the construction site.On the train, the second time I cried because of Yu Jie, the first time was the night of the college entrance examination breakup dinner.

This meeting lasted less than three hours, but it was enough for me to see clearly that the entanglement between us in the past five years was a complete mistake.Neither Yu Jie nor I pierced the last layer of window paper, and our relationship remains between friendship and love.But even though we didn't make it clear, we both understood each other's thoughts.

She needs a sense of security and needs to rely on, but she has no courage to admit her relationship with me, because I am a woman; but what I need is a firm heart, and I am willing to guard that relationship.

I can't accept her cowardice, and she doesn't dare to promise me.

Mistaking dependence and affection for love, in the end we all suffer the consequences.

After that, our contact was basically cut off.After my senior year, I was busy looking for jobs and internships, and I basically didn't go home for a few days during the holidays.After that, the work basically stabilized, and I went to a new city, changed a new contact method, and never contacted again.

One night, I received a multimedia message with a picture and a paragraph of text.The photo shows a girl's left hand with an elegant diamond ring on her middle finger.The text said, Yang Fan, he proposed to me, and I will get married soon.

I was stunned for a long time, until I realized that this MMS message came from Jie, and my nose couldn't help being sore.I closed my eyes, not wanting the tears to flow out, let alone these few words stinging my eyes.

Until Yu Jie sent the second text message: Reply to me, okay?

Sadness was finally defeated by her desire for happiness, and she was defeated.

I didn't reply, raised the back of my hand and wiped my tear-stained cheeks, deleted these two text messages from strange numbers, and pulled them into the blacklist.

Seven years have passed, she is finally getting married, and finally found someone who can accompany her.And I can finally stop waiting for her to call me back and say she misses me.

I just hope that if it rains heavily next time, the person who put on the ring for her will also brave the storm to pick her up, so that she won't be left crying alone in the corner covering her ears in fear.

The author has something to say: she is really getting married, her diamond ring is beautiful, and I can finally start living my own life, which is great.