pedestrian

The gaze in the memory was so captivating, Wu Yue was stunned for a long time before recovering from the bitter tea fragrance.She took a deep breath and began to narrate what she agreed to Chang Zheng.

"How did Chang Zheng and us Guizhou meet at school? I don't know the ins and outs... I guess you don't want to hear it, so I'll just talk about it. What Chang Zheng couldn't say by himself should be what he was referring to." this."

Tao Ran seemed to be very interested in the mist curling up above the teacup, watching intently, but only slightly nodded upon hearing this.

"Gui Zhou's grades were very good during most of his high school years. After the second year of high school, he seldom dropped from the first place. At that time, he had a very arrogant personality and didn't know how to be as harmonious as possible with the people around him. , After a long time like this, some people will start to envy him."

The past has already happened, but to use his own voice to unveil the prelude to that year again, for Wu Yueyin, there is still a lot of psychological pressure.Tao Ran didn't speak, and sat silently across from her. This somewhat relieved her, at least she could continue talking.

"At that time, there was a provincial mathematics competition. There was a boy in their class who was partial to the subject. It is said that he had been thinking about this entry place for a long time, and had been waiting for the teacher to come to him to mention it. In the environment where one test determines his life, everyone The students value any opportunity very much. Later, when the registration deadline passed, he found out that the quota had actually been given to Guizhou long ago, and the teacher had never considered others.”

——After things calmed down a bit, Wu Yueyin had a private conversation with Chang Zheng, and learned that the boy had clearly expressed his dissatisfaction on many occasions, and even stood up in math class and questioned the teacher why he hid the school News about the competition.But Wu Guizhou's consistent grades are there, even if he takes the grade card and picks in order, it's actually not his turn.

But the paranoid and tyrannical nature of teenagers often cannot be understood with the normal logic of adults.

"He has been dissatisfied for a long time. Once he took advantage of Guizhou to participate in the competition counseling, and a group of classmates were making noises, so he went to look in the desk drawer of Guizhou. It was so unfortunate that there happened to be a letter in his drawer that day. Half a love letter."

—It was a calm afternoon.No one knows that a teenager's impulsiveness is about to ignite the malice in the whole town.Wu Yueyin was participating in club activities on the university campus hundreds of kilometers away, Wu Guizhou was attending classes in another teaching building across the playground, his father was working, and his mother was preparing dinner at home.But just a few minutes later, all this peace will become a distant memory.

"Maybe the class monitor got in touch with puppy love, and a group of half-grown children got excited and encouraged him to stand on the podium to read, and he really went. It was a break between classes, and some students who had a good relationship with Guizhou had already gone. I told him, but it was too late when he came back. I have already read..."

Tao Ran didn't know when he raised his head and looked into Wu Yueyin's eyes seriously: "What did you read, how could you...be out of the closet?"

Wu Yueyin smiled wryly: "There is a sentence there, 'If it wasn't for that chance encounter in the locker room, I might still be lying to myself, I am just a pure brotherhood to you'. The school is very small, there is only one locker room, It’s right next to the playground, and it’s just for boys to change their clothes before and after playing.”

Now, even Tao Ran's face became gloomy.

——The laughter went out in an instant, and everyone fell silent.The people standing outside turned around and found Wu Guizhou, and they all made way for him as if they were avoiding the plague.

Moses divided the sea to open the future, but the road before him to divide the sea of ​​people is destined to be lonely and painful.

In the silence, he heard all the cracking sounds.

And his only luck was that he hadn't had time to write the two words that he cared about, Ah Zheng, on that piece of paper.

"Anyway, that day, our town, probably starting from the school, was lit by this incident. In our small place... no one has ever come out of the closet before, let alone like this. My dad I did a little business and made some friends in the business field. I didn’t know what I heard that afternoon. When I got home after drinking too much at night, I started to lose my temper. It was quite late that day and I didn’t go back. My mother looked at my father. It's really scary, so I sent a message to tell him not to come back."

——Before this message, there were actually several phone calls.It's just that after school that day, Wu Guizhou made an appointment with Chang Zheng far away from the school, and broke up with him as soon as they met.It was just when young love was strong, and such an accident happened just now, of course Chang Zheng disagreed.The two quarreled directly, and Wu Guizhou missed his mother's warning call because of this.

"When Guizhou received it, he was already downstairs. When he walked to the door, he heard my dad roaring at home. The meaning behind the words was that my mother insisted on letting Guizhou learn the piano. People have learned to become perverted. He was afraid that my dad would go crazy and hurt my mom, so he didn't dare to go far from the door. Later, my dad went to the kitchen and took a knife to chop the piano. Guizhou rushed in and blocked it with his right hand. ,Then……"

Tao Ran let her cover her eyes for a long time, and then took a few facial tissues from the table and handed them over.Wu Yueyin picked it up, and after a while, he continued.

"My mother remembered to call me when I was sent to the hospital that night. I rushed back the next night. I asked my parents to go back to rest that night. It was my company night. I wanted to avoid Leave your parents alone and talk to him about what you plan to do in the future. At that time, I asked him if his hands could recover, and he said that he needed to recover for writing, so don’t even think about playing the piano.”

——Aiqin loves people who are willing to risk themselves to save Qin, but because of such a choice, she can no longer play the piano.This deep regret made Wu Yueyin unforgettable for a long time, and later he insisted on letting He Xunyan learn the piano.She still dare not bring up the topic of piano with Wu Guizhou directly. Even if he asks him to teach children to learn piano, she will discuss it with her family and never mention it.

"He said that he wanted to drop out of school, or transfer to another school, so that he could leave Chang Zheng's living environment. He felt that Chang Zheng was too emotional. If he still looked up and down, he would show up and do something stupid one day. My dad just listened. All the gossip in the afternoon can be drunk like that in a blink of an eye, and the words spread outside will only be worse. He can't get his parents out, so at least he can't implicate Chang Zheng any more."

——At that time, Wu Guizhou even smiled when he mentioned the words "too much emotion".Wu Yueyin saw that smile, and he didn't want to watch any love-themed movies or TV for a long time in the future.It was also that smile that made her understand that Wu Guizhou had regarded breaking up and continuing to love Chang Zheng as two separate events in his heart.

Breaking up was to protect him, and then fell in love, which has since become Wu Guizhou's only concern.

"It doesn't matter whether you suspend school or transfer to another school. In fact, you can do it, but it's just a waste of time. I advised him not to worry about it. Passing the exam as soon as possible is the most direct solution. Later, he also listened to me, and just gritted his teeth in that school. Until the college entrance examination."

At this point, the room gradually became quiet.Wu Yueyin's speech was neither fast nor coherent, and he would always remain silent for a long time after speaking.The sun outside the window was gradually slanting westward, and the light hit the teak floor beside her, everything was like a sad oil painting.

——After all, it is my brother's private matter, and she can only bury some details in her heart.That day she rushed to the hospital and talked with Wu Guizhou almost all night. When it was almost dawn, she accidentally glanced outside, only to find that Chang Zheng was still there, not moving a single step.

Before going to bed, she couldn't help but remind Wu Guizhou: "He hasn't left yet."

Wu Guizhou replied quickly to the words without beginning or end.

"It will always go. Sooner or later he will understand that it is better for everyone."

……

Neither of them touched the tea on the table much, they just put it from hot to cold, taking another sip at this time, it was so bitter that one's heart shuddered.Wu Yueyin was distracted for too long, and finally Tao Ran broke the long silence.

"...And then, and then?"

"There's nothing else. Later, Guizhou did not do well in the exam, not much higher than the first line, and he was very sad. But relatives and friends at home still came to congratulate him one after another, and joked that reading a book was at least counted. Jinshi background. Parents also seemed relieved. I really couldn’t bring myself to mention whether to repeat or not. Guizhou didn’t say anything. Later, he filled in a school in our provincial capital and went to school if he could. "

Tao Ran couldn't help but sighed, thought over and over again, and then asked: "Then why didn't you take the postgraduate entrance examination after finishing your undergraduate degree? It's a pity that you have such a good background."

Wu Yueyin's answer to him was as light as a water mark: "Then when he graduated, my mother was diagnosed with kidney disease. I only worked for two or three years at that time, and my father's business was all over in the year of the economic crisis. , The family really needed his income, so he went to work directly. My dad was a heavy drinker for a few years before his death. Sometimes my mother was unwell and had to go to the hospital alone. He was so drunk at home that he couldn't even scream. Gui Zhou originally wanted to go out to work, but after thinking about it, he found one in the provincial capital nearby. If something happened to the family, he would be able to go back in at least an hour. At that time, we could not rest assured that my mother was handed over to my father. gone."

The heavy hammers came one after another, Tao Ran couldn't stand it anymore.But now that the matter has been discussed, he has no way out: "My father... passed away?"

"I left a long time ago. Alcoholism, heavy food taste, too oily and spicy, and it was already at an advanced stage when I was discovered, pancreatic cancer. This disease is usually fast, and there is no time to spend much money. It only takes a few months before and after. He was gone, and my mother's health was even worse. Later, in order to take care of her daily life, Guizhou went back to the town to work as an engineer for a hydropower station. Oh, by the way, Chang Zheng also lent us a sum of money at that time. The doctor has already suggested not to bother. What he mentioned on the phone yesterday was that when I paid him back the money, he said that our family owed him a favor. Now that he and Guizhou are no longer possible , then I will pay back in the future.”

These words were like a sponge that had absorbed enough ice water, tightly holding Tao Ran's breath.

In fact, there is still a part missing in this story. Wu Guizhou probably deliberately hid it from his family, so Wu Yueyin didn't know about it, but Tao Ran knew it very clearly.

During the period between Chang Zheng's graduation from university and Wu's father's death from a serious illness, they actually lived together in the north for a while.At least when Wei Fangcheng knew Chang Zheng, he and Wu Guizhou had a dog named Congee together.

So that box of sugared garlic was for his family to get the special products he brought back from "working in the provincial capital".Then something irreversible must have happened between the two of them, causing Wu Guizhou to let his sister pay back the money on his behalf, rather than having any involvement with Chang Zheng.

That's it...that's it.

The world was so chaotic, and the room was silent, he didn't want to say anything.

The author has something to say: I would like to thank the artist Kazama for his advice and help on the narrative structure and details of this section