Xiaoman

When the door was unscrewed again, Liu Xiaoman didn't want to turn his head to look, now he couldn't hold back a smile no matter who came in.

"Full." Grandpa called him.

"Ah." Liu Xiaoman responded, without stopping, and continued to work on the problem.

Grandpa sat down on the edge of the bed behind him and touched his head.

Liu Xiaoman put down his pen and turned to face his grandfather.

"Your father's family is back, you feel bad?" Grandpa asked.

"No." Liu Xiaoman whispered.

"Are you pretending to be with me?" Grandpa let out a muffled laugh.

Liu Xiaoman also grinned with difficulty.

Aunt Mei was still scolding the child outside the door, Cancan was still crying at the top of her voice, his father couldn't suppress his voice after shouting twice, so he simply ignored it and turned up the TV volume again.

Liu Xiaoman had an illusion that now he could walk to the street as long as he opened the door.

"You know why I didn't drive them away?" Grandpa moved closer to him and asked in a low voice.

It's hard to answer this question. In fact, there is no reason at all. This is my grandfather's own son, and this alone is enough.

But Liu Xiaoman didn't dare to say that directly, he always felt that if he really said it straight, his grandfather would be sad.

What kind of son did you raise?Something happened and he left the house and ran away. After more than ten years, he quietly said to bring someone back, and he came back in such a wimpy manner.

"He is your father." Grandpa continued without waiting for his answer.

Liu Xiaoman raised his eyelids and looked at him.

"Man, the blood is cut continuously." Grandpa took his hand in his palm and touched it, "You were born by your father, and you will never change in this lifetime."

"Like he was born to me," he said hoarsely.

"Grandpa told you something heartfelt. I haven't told you all these years. I always think that you are still young." Grandpa looked into his eyes with an uncomfortable kindness in his eyes, "I will say that today." I feel that I should say it, I should say it today, and I always feel that if I don’t say it today, I will run out of time.”

He explained again: "I'll just say it once, say what comes to mind, you can take it to heart after you've heard it, don't learn from others, and don't keep thinking about it, just listen and remember."

Liu Xiaoman suddenly realized that he hadn't been face to face with his grandfather for a long time, and looked at each other for a long time. He obviously lived together every day, getting up early and returning home late. Muddy, he was as ignorant as the hunchback of grandpa.

"Grandpa, tell me." He also grabbed Grandpa's hand.

"People need a home." Grandpa spread his palms and stroked them.

"A person must have a place. No matter when he wants to go back, he can go back. No matter what kind of person he is, he will miss home when he is old. When he is young, he can run, but he can't. Those who want to go back are still with parents."

"Your father is the same, and you will be the same in the future."

"No matter how unprofessional he is, no matter how bad he is, my blood is still flowing in his bones. People say that fallen leaves return to their roots, and fallen leaves return to their roots. I am uneducated, and I know that this is not suitable for your father, but that is what it means."

"You are still growing up all your life. I have been dragging you for the past ten years. One day I will disappear. What will you do alone?"

"You may feel wronged, don't say you are wronged, I think you feel bad too, can you not feel bad? You have been raised by me all these years, and you have been raised from such a small size, one bite at a time, how uncomfortable are you? Don't you feel bad if you bump into me?"

"If you didn't survive back then, it's gone. I'm an old man who has lived to this day. Liu Yong knelt on the ground and knocked his head to pieces. I wouldn't let him in. I would die at home and smell bad at home. I don't need him What kind of filial piety do you do?"

"Grandpa..." Liu Xiaoman couldn't hear this, and immediately wanted to interrupt Grandpa.

"Listen." Grandpa clapped his hands.

"Then, don't you still have me? I have to think for you. I just think, it's good if he comes back at this time. I can give you a whole house while I can still move."

"I know you look down on them. After you are admitted to university and I'm gone, you can fly, far away, as long as you can fly, you can fly anywhere.

"But no matter where you fly to, you must have a home."

"I'm afraid that I'm full. This life is so hard. One day I'm tired of flying and I want to turn back. There's no one to open the door. What can I do..."

Like an old dragon, Grandpa blinked and choked out from deep in his throat.

Tears welled up in Liu Xiaoman's eyes, and he wanted to reach out to get toilet paper for his grandpa, but his grandpa grabbed him and didn't let go.

"Sooner or later, there will be a day for me. I don't have anything to hide. In fact, it's quite interesting to think about it. God, this dog thing, how much he takes from you and gives you, it's the same as measuring with a tape measure. What should be given to you, at the right time He has to give it to him, and take it away, and it will not be left until five o'clock in the middle of the night."

"Who you should meet in your life, when and where those people should appear in front of you are all counted."

"Forecasting that it's time for me to go, I'll send your father to you."

Grandpa turned his face away and coughed vigorously a few times. After coughing, he laughed again in a hoarse voice.

"You have to remember the words of the grandfather, cut off the bones and connect the tendons."

"If he can come back, he has you more or less in his heart. I also saw that your Aunt Mei is a real person, and she is better than your conscientious mother. But stepmother and stepmother, no matter how real she is, she will take it." After', with a son, there is no unbiased stepmother."

"The future master is gone..." Grandpa paused for a moment, then clenched Liu Xiaoman's hand again, his eyes were terribly red, "If you feel a little wronged, let's bear it; If you have enough food to eat, study hard, you must pass the exam, and if you pass the exam, you will be able to learn, go to the ground and put a whip on the ground, and I can close my eyes in the field."

"That little Cancan, at this age, is ignorant, don't be like him, grow up well, this is your brother, you have to help each other at critical times, and don't let you be bullied..."

"Master!" Liu Xiaoman couldn't listen anymore, and tried to hold back the volume of crying to interrupt Grandpa again.

"One last thing." Grandpa raised an index finger to signal him to whisper, then leaned close to his ear like an old urchin sharing a secret, and whispered, "Passbook, money, and house book are all in the cabinet under the bed." In the book, the password master wrote it in the small book and put it in."

Grandpa patted the bed board.

"I wrote the things that should be explained a few years ago, and put them all in there. When I leave, this house will be yours."

In this cramped hut that is not even spacious, in the home where they have lived together for more than ten years, the grandpa and grandson whispered with their heads pressed against each other through the noisy family outside the door.

"It's all my Xiaoman's, don't give it to anyone who wants it."

Many years later, Liu Xiaoman can still clearly recall this scene, can recall these words of his grandfather verbatim, can remember every word, how he stabbed him from the bottom of his heart from the inside out.

He didn't understand how he could still have so many tears after the first scene of breaking his arm, pouring from his eye sockets to his face one by one, and he couldn't stop.

Doesn't it mean that everything is countable?

Why do pain, sorrow, and tears always have to be out of this category?

He wiped away the tears on Grandpa with his hands, feeling that he could never finish.He wanted to call out "Master", but he opened his mouth but couldn't make a sound.

"...I don't want it." From the throat to the heart seemed to be stuffed with absorbent cotton, his chest hurt so much that he could only choke out this sentence in a hoarse voice.

He doesn't want these, he just wants his grandfather to be safe and sound, and a long life is enough.

Grandpa also wiped his tears. The fingers honed by decades of wind and rain were thick and thick, piercing his face like old tree bark, and wiped the corners of his eyes and cheeks red. In the end, he could only smile and pat him: " Fool."

"I'm always in such a posture, my arms and legs are numb." Grandpa let go of Liu Xiaoman, rubbed his right shoulder, and stood up a little while supporting the bed, "Let's study, and go to Yangyang's house with your dad later .”

There is nothing else to go to Fan Yiyang's house, even Liu Xiaoman's father has been back for a few days, and the Fan family has taken care of his old father and weak children for so many years, so they should pay a visit and say thank you.

"Should I... go?" Before leaving the door, Aunt Mei leaned over and asked Xiao Man's father in a low voice.

"Where are you going, you know who they are." Xiaoman's father said impatiently.

Aunt Mei didn't speak, she silently took the coat and asked Xiao Man's father to put it on.

Liu Xiaoman watched from the side, although he didn't say anything, he felt awkward in his heart.

Now that he and his grandfather thought about going together, they both thought that Aunt Mei was pretty nice, then seeing his father yelling at Aunt Mei, Aunt Mei didn't complain about serving their father and son, so he just felt sorry for her. Fall forbearance.

How can you fall in love with someone like his father?

What do you want him to do?

How old is he?Figure that he doesn't take a bath?

A sentence he heard on TV popped into his mind.

I went downstairs to Uncle Song's supermarket to pick up some things. When Uncle Song checked out, he stared at Xiaoman's father several times, and then at Liu Xiaoman next to him.

When Xiaoman's father left, there was still an electrical appliance store downstairs. Uncle Song's supermarket opened later, and he was not familiar with their family at that time, but Uncle Song was also a neighbor nearby, so I still have a little impression.

Moreover, it has been spread all over the street in the past few days that Liu Yong from the old Liu family has returned, brought a new woman and gave birth to a new son.

With arms and legs.

"Is it Brother Yong?" He asked Xiao Man's father.

"Ah, don't dare to admit it anymore?" Xiaoman's father smiled, his eyelids were slumped, and he didn't look up to see people, as if guilty.

"Really?" Uncle Song shouted, "Where did you go to develop after all these years? Now that you are back, the old man is enjoying the blessings, and you don't have to suffer anymore."

"What's going on?" Xiaoman's father said "Hi", and took out a cigarette for him to disperse, "I just do engineering, and it's not going well..."

Liu Xiaoman only listened to it once, then turned and went to the door, kicking the toe of his shoe and waiting for him.

Can't stand it.

Fan Yiyang's family knew that Xiaoman's father was back a few days ago, and they were not surprised when they saw someone coming to the door, as if he had never walked by.

Liu Xiaoman was more at ease when he arrived at Fan Yiyang's house than in his own home now, and waited for Fan Yiyang to say hello to his father, and the two of them went back to the room and huddled together.

"Are you okay?" Fan Yiyang leaned against the wall and asked him.

Liu Xiaoman sat on the edge of the bed playing with his fingers, pursed his lips and smiled at him, neither saying yes nor no.

"What's wrong with your eyes...are you crying?" Fan Yiyang took a step forward, knelt down and looked at Liu Xiaoman.

"No." Liu Xiaoman evaded to the side, rubbing his eyes, "I didn't sleep well."

Fan Yiyang sighed, and pulled his hand off: "Dirty, don't mess around."

Liu Xiaoman put his hand down, not knowing why.

The two of them listened to the voices of the adults outside, which were quite indistinct, and they occasionally skipped a few words clearly, but they didn't really want to hear them in their ears.

"Xiao Man," Fan Yiyang called him softly again, "If you can't stay at home, or you can come to my place for a few days."

"No need." Liu Xiaoman shook his head, "Grandpa is still at home."

"Yes." Fan Yiyang frowned, "I can't let Grandpa do it himself."

Liu Xiaoman felt that he seemed to be more worried than himself today, and his condition was not as easy as usual, so he smiled and pushed his shoulder: "Are you afraid of him?"

"Who?" Fan Yiyang asked.

Liu Xiaoman pointed to the door.

He didn't want to call Dad in front of Liu Yong, even through the wall.

Fan Yiyang also smiled with the corners of his mouth pulled, and glanced at Liu Xiaoman's arm: "I've been a little afraid of him since I was a child, have you forgotten?"

"Ah." Liu Xiaoman thought for a while.

Memory is an amazing thing, especially his memories before the accident were more than half lost by the electricity, and everything about his childhood was wrapped up like a paste.He didn't have this impression at first, but when Fan Yiyang said it, he seemed to have some images, like reading other people's stories.

"Remember?" Fan Yiyang stared at him.

"Hmm..." Liu Xiaoman dragged his voice and nodded halfway, "No."

Fan Yiyang didn't speak, and continued to look at him.

"I can't even remember their faces, how can I remember these things?" Liu Xiaoman said with a smile.

Fan's father and Fan's mother wanted to keep Liu Xiaoman for dinner with his father, but they both waved their hands and refused.

Liu Yong was ashamed, Liu Xiaoman didn't want to have dinner with his father at someone else's house, there was something to talk about at the dinner table, the topic must be related to his father, he couldn't open his mouth, and didn't want to hear a word.

The Fan family also understood that they didn't keep much, and forced Liu Xiaoman to take a big paper bag of snacks back.

Liu Xiaoman followed his father back with his snacks. It was still light when he came, but it was dark when he returned.

It's 29, and there are no people on the street, and every household that should be reunited has been reunited.Liu Xiaoman looked up and looked around, every small window in the family building was warmly lit, whoever was stewing meat, who was playing mahjong, who was joking, a ray of happiness permeated through the windows until On the street, it smells like what Chinese New Year should have.

very nice.

Even if he thinks that he will face a messy home when he goes back later, this kind of atmosphere makes him feel that the world is very cute most of the time.

If he hadn't been disabled, he would be like Fan Yiyang now, a young man with good health scores, so it would be pretty good for him to go home for dinner after New Year's greetings with his father...

"I..." Before he could say "Ting", his father suddenly spoke, shaking his emotions away.

Liu Xiaoman looked at him from behind, didn't answer, waiting to hear what he wanted to say.

His father didn't look back and didn't stop, he just slowed down a bit and continued, "It's not that I don't want to come back after all these years, it's not that I don't want you."

"I was doing projects with people outside, and I put all the money in it. I spent a lot of money on it, and the salary was like squeezing toothpaste."

"I also met your Aunt Mei at the construction site. She is a country girl. She goes to cook for the construction site. She is a good person. I am at a disadvantage. But she has never complained. I thought that at least I should give her a decent life. In the past few years, I have been focusing on making money outside."

"This year, the boss ran away. I really can't help it. Cancan has to go to kindergarten. Kindergarten can be delayed, and then I can go to elementary school..."

Liu Yong's few short sentences were mixed with many nondescript dialects, Liu Xiaoman couldn't understand, but from his tone, he could understand that they were all curse words.

Hearing these words until "Cancan", he didn't feel any disturbance in his heart.

After keywords such as Cancan, kindergarten, and elementary school appeared, he suddenly felt disgusted and annoyed.

Aunt Mei and Cancan are indeed your responsibility, but what about Grandpa?

From the beginning to the end, from the beginning to the end, where did you put Grandpa?

Liu Xiaoman didn't expect to hear anything related to him from him at all, didn't expect him to say some words of paternal love, and didn't even expect him to make up some nonsense to deceive himself.

It's useless to cheat, family affection is the most deceitful thing, and you can tell whether you are pleasing or a burden with just one look.

He just didn't deserve it for his grandpa. Thinking about what his grandpa said to him this afternoon, he felt bad for his grandpa from the bottom of his heart.

Liu Yong was still talking, and Liu Xiaoman didn't want to hear another word, he was trying to interrupt his words, but before he could speak, he heard someone calling himself.

"Liu Xiaoman!" It was Xia Liang's voice.

His heart skipped a beat, and he hurriedly turned his head to look for him. Xia Liang was walking down the alley, stopped under the streetlight that came to him before, and waved to him.

Liu Xiaoman didn't know how he could hold back and didn't run directly to him. He forgot what he wanted to say just now, and he hurriedly said to Liu Yong: "You go back first, tell grandpa that my classmate came to see me .”

"Who is it?" Liu Yong stared at Xia Liang and asked.

"My classmate." Liu Xiaoman repeated, turned around and was about to leave.

After taking a big step, he looked at the thing in his hand, then turned back and handed it to Liu Yong: "Give it to Cancan."

Liu Yong looked at Xia Liang, looked at him, and took it.

Liu Xiaoman ignored him and walked straight towards Xia Liang.

Seeing him coming, Xia Liang didn't continue to wait under the street lamp. He took two steps back, turned around, and walked towards the alley.

Liu Xiaoman was able to follow him at a constant speed a few steps ahead, and when Xia Liang's figure turned and disappeared into the dark alley, he ran over uncontrollably.

Turning into the alley, Xia Liang was really standing there, just as Liu Xiaoman showed his shadow, Xia Liang grabbed him by the collar and dragged him in, hugged and kissed him.

"Do it again." Xia Liang let him go and took a few steps back.

Liu Xiaoman was at the stage of being dazzled by happiness. He didn't understand what he meant, but he just grabbed Xia Liang and didn't want to let go.

After Xia Liang stood up, he opened his arms to him again and looked at him openly: "Come here."

Now there should be a firework in the sky.

Liu Xiaoman thought.

Like his mood.

He stepped forward, throwing himself at Xia Liang without hesitation.