implication

Shui Xin smoked for a long time alone at the back door. If the smoke rings hadn't been spit out from his mouth one by one, otherwise he would be like an empty decoration like the trash can beside him.

It was getting dark and the bar was about to open.If you don't go in again, you will feel like there is a ghost in your heart.Squeezing the bitten cigarette holder, pinching out the cigarette butt, and burning it, the person seemed to wake up, flicked off half of the cigarette in his hand, and sighed with lowered head, "I'm really dizzy. Unexpectedly..."

He actually took the initiative to sleep with Jiang Ze.It has been several years since a situation has been so out of control.

Qi sighed again, straightened his clothes, showed a smile suitable for the evening reception, became a veteran of accidents, turned around and planned to enter the venue.

The uncontrollable situation was not limited to last night, another one came head-on.

"Ning Fei! What are you doing?" Jiang Ze's angry shout was heard in the distance.

"Where is Shui Xin? Where is Shui Xin?!" Nearby was Ning Fei's rare manic voice.

"Ning Fei?" Shui Xin called out to him in confusion, thinking there was something urgent.When Ning Fei was striding towards him, a gust of wind rushed towards him. It was more like a gust of air from Ning Fei's brows.

Shui Xin's intuition has always been accurate, and when Ning Fei was two steps away from him, he grabbed his wrist unceremoniously. hand, asked him in a panic, "Ningfei, what are you doing?"

"Sleep with me!" Ning Fei replied without looking back, only dragging him to the lounge.

"Ning Fei, calm down! The bar is about to open! I don't have time to fight with you!" Shui Xin leaned back, pushing Ning Fei's back with all his strength with his free hand, but the red-eyed In front of Ning Fei, this bit of resistance is useless.

Shui Xin was dragged into the door by Ning Fei, Ning Fei had a lot of strength, Shui Xin was thrown to the ground directly.Before he got up, Ning Fei who locked the door had already stepped on his trousers and squatted down to stare at him.

Shui Xin pulled her clothes, turned her face away, and said in a calm and indifferent voice, "Ning Fei, stop making trouble."

"It's you who said that as long as we sleep, there is no reason to stay by his side no matter how much we can't let go."

"It's late, Ning Fei." Shui Xin tore off the trousers that Ning Fei had stepped on, and patted her hand, "It's late, I've already slept with Jiang Ze."

"What?" Ning Fei only noticed the mark on Shui Xin's neck when she lowered her head.

"Shui Xin!"

Jiang Ze called Shui Xin's name and broke in.When he entered the door and saw Shui Xin who had been pushed to the ground and his clothes were messy, Jiang Ze was so angry that his eyes burned, he rushed over and punched Ning Fei in the face, "Ning Fei! Don't go too far!"

Ning Fei was punched by Jiang Ze and fell to the ground, coughing twice, with the smell of blood coming out of his mouth again, he stood up to watch Jiang Ze lift Shui Xin up and take off his clothes to cover him.Jiang Ze embraced Shui Xin's shoulders, turned his head and accused Ning Fei, "Ning Fei, you are too much! It's fine if you don't believe Shui Xin, but now you have to make him angry!"

Jiang Ze felt wronged for Shui Xin, he didn't know what Shui Xin had proposed to Ning Fei, he only thought that Ning Fei came to find Shui Xin angrily to investigate the matter of Lin Ling's drowning last night.

"I told you that Shui Xin can't swim! If he pushed someone, why did he fall into the pool?"

Shui Xin didn't want Jiang Ze to continue talking, fearing that the scene would be embarrassing if he continued, he interrupted with a mixed smile, "Maybe I'm even more innocent if I fall too."

"Enough! Shui Xin!" Shui Xin was taken aback by Jiang Ze's yelling, it was the first time he saw Jiang Ze get so angry.Jiang Ze angrily pointed at Shui Xin and pointed at Ning Fei, "Enough is enough for you all! Do you think you can maintain the peace before? If you don't squeeze out the pus, the wound will rot! Ning Fei, Listen clearly! It was Shui Xin who was pushed by Lin Quan last night!"

"Jiang Ze, stop talking." Shui Xin grabbed Jiang Ze's arm and begged in a low voice, "Stop talking, it's unnecessary. I don't care about being looked down upon."

"But I care! Shui Xin, you obviously haven't done it, why..."

"Because I owe Lin Qian once."

"I know."

Ning Fei's speech made Jiang Ze and Shui Xin look at him in surprise.Ning Fei got up from the ground, spat out a mouthful of bloody phlegm, wiped the back of his hand against the corner of his mouth, and said in a deep voice, "I actually know that it was Lin Qiu who pushed you and then fell into the water by himself."

"You know?" Jiang Ze stared at Ning Fei with wide eyes, "Then why are you?"

Ning Fei didn't speak, silence brushed them off and walked out.The lively night had already begun, Ning Fei passed through the noisy men and women, walked out of the bar, and felt the cool breeze on the street full of neon signs.There was still a slight pain in the corner of his mouth, which made him more awake, and he looked up at the moon covered by clouds.

"If you don't pretend like this, what excuse can Lin Chi rely on me, and what excuse can I use to stay by his side?"

Unfortunately, it seems to be getting farther and farther away.Jiang Ze has a good saying, if the pus is not squeezed out, the wound will rot.Ning Fei is afraid of pain and dare not dare, usually Ning Fei is not afraid of it, he is set up to fall into a quagmire, he has already felt no pain, but when he meets Lin Qiu, he will be afraid of pain, he will be reluctant, even if it is a false appearance, he is still greedy.

Still being picked up by Jiang Ze tonight, Ning Fei's heart twitched and ached. He was clearly awake, but he wobbled when he walked.Just like that, I wobbled all the way back to the old neighborhood.Stop at the corridor entrance and dare not go inside.

He escaped, and he didn't control it well for a while, revealing the dirty thoughts he had hidden for a long time. He was afraid of going back to face Lin Chen, and he didn't know how to explain it.The only thing that is clear is that it is not so easy to cover up, and the illusion of peace has finally been broken.

Ning Fei paused, not knowing what to do for the first time in his life.what to do?I can't leave Lin Qian here alone, he must be scared, and he said no in such a sad voice.But how to face it, how to stay calmly by his side?

"What a hypocrite!" Ning Fei hit his head with his fist, "I clearly promised to protect him, but now..."

What is the difference between me and Feng Lin?

Ning Fei regretted and regretted alone, immersed in self-blame, and was suddenly startled by the cat that jumped out.

"Latte?" Ning Fei picked up the latte and looked at it strangely, "Why did you come out?"

After saying this sentence, think back carefully, did you close the door when you ran out?It feels like there is no, otherwise why would the latte come out?What about Lin Chi?How is Lin Chi?

Thinking of Lin Chi, Ning Fei hurried into the corridor with her latte in her arms.After running for two steps, he stopped, because there was a dark shadow on the stairs, and it was a person sitting on the stairs with his legs crossed and his head bowed.

"Lin Chi?" Ning Fei tentatively asked.

Lin Qiu with his head down didn't respond.Sighing, Ning Fei stepped forward, put the latte on Lin Qiu's knee, and took his hand to touch Latte's head, "Here is the latte."

He thought Lin Chi was out looking for the cat.

Before the hand was retracted, a tear just fell on the back of the hand, soaking into the pores, and making the heart tremble violently.

"I'm waiting for you." Lin Chen raised his face to look at Ning Fei, Ning Fei was shocked because Lin Chen's face was full of tears.He raised his hand to wipe away tears for Lin Chen, "Stop crying, it's my fault. I'm an asshole."

Lin Chen shook his head, and a few drops of tears fell on Ning Fei's face, "No. I'm the bad guy." Lin Chen sobbed as he spoke, "Ning Fei, I feel like a bad guy. I'm the one who took Shui Xin I was the one who pushed into the pool."

"Lin Chen..." Ning Fei covered his face with her palm, rubbing her thumb on his cheek to wipe away his tears.

Lin Chi shook his shoulders and said, sobbing, "Ning Fei...I...did something bad. I...wasn't a good boy anymore. I don't know why, but I suddenly...had a prejudice against him. Then he walked in the In front of me, I was very unwilling, and I stretched out my hand behind his back, I am really good or bad."

Ning Fei helped him wipe away the unstoppable tears, "It's over, let's forget it."

Lin Chen shook his head violently, "I can't get over it. I can't get over it in my heart. I hate myself, and I seem to have become a person like Feng Lin, inflicting malice on others for no reason. I hate it, Ning Fei, I hate this so much. Why? Why did I become like this? Obviously I have made up my mind not to be someone like Feng Lin who bullies others at will. Why, Ning Fei?"

Ning Fei couldn't answer, because he also had the same trouble.

Lin Chen was tired from crying, coupled with alcohol, and gradually became drowsy. Ning Fei turned his back to him and squatted down, pulled his arm, wrapped it around his neck, and lifted him up.The moment he got up, he still didn't forget to lean on Lin Chen's latte, and just like before, he unzipped the hoodie and stuffed the cat directly into his arms.

Ning Fei stepped on the stairs step by step with Lin Qiu behind her back, her steps were deep, the corridor was quiet and there was no sound.Lin Chi cried out his tears, squinted his eyes slightly and tilted his head on Ning Fei's shoulder, "I hate it, I hate myself like this."

Ning Fei carried him back to the loft without saying a word, put Lin Ling on the bed, and the latte jumped out of his arms immediately.Ning Fei supported Lin Qiao's head and slowly put it on the pillow. Lin Qiao turned over as soon as he touched the pillow, and hugged the teddy bear next to him.

Lin Chen fell asleep, and fell into a deep sleep because of the alcohol.But tears still flowed from the corners of his eyes.Ning Fei reached out to wipe it off for him, and touched his cheek, "Lin Qiu, you know, I'm actually in pain. I like you, and I warned myself not to get close, but I still unconsciously disrupted your life. I actually I hated myself too."

Ning Fei withdrew her hand, sat on the edge of the bed and looked at Lin Chi who was sleeping peacefully, saw his flushed face and swollen eyelids after crying for too long, and suddenly thought of his smile during the day.That smile made Ning Fei feel that Lin Qiao was still the same Lin Qiao from before, but he couldn't be that simple Lin Qiao when he was around.

Ning Fei touched Lin Qiu's face again, and Lin Qiu in the dream avoided it with a grunt.With her hands hanging on her cheeks, Ning Fei suddenly smiled, "You are simple and dull, maybe you can't figure out the reason why you became like this, but I can't keep pretending to be stupid anymore. It's because of me that you became like this, Maybe if I leave you, I will return to the smiling Lin Chi from before."

The suitcase that has not been opened has been dragged, Ning Fei thought as he was pulling the suitcase, it’s a good thing he didn’t clean up the things in the suitcase, otherwise it would take a lot of trouble now, and it’s hard to fall asleep after arguing of Lin Yi.The lame Latte came over and called out to Ning Fei.Ning Fei made a "shh" gesture towards it.

"Don't wake him up."

Latte was always at odds with him, so he ignored Ning Fei and jumped into the suitcase and got down on the ground.On weekdays, besides the bed, its favorite thing is to lie on Ning Fei's suitcase.Ning Fei hugged it down and nodded its nose and said, "I'm leaving. From now on..." His voice choked up, and he turned his head to look at the bed, "From now on, you will stay with him obediently."

The lights in the room were not turned on, but there was a long strip of light on the ground, which was reflected on the ground by the lights in the corridor.Latte sat in the light, looking up at the half-closed door.

"Meow--"

It barks again.But this time Ning Fei didn't stop him, and stood at the door and turned his head to look in the direction of the bed.In the end, he smiled helplessly, as if he had made up his mind and finally closed the door.

There was no more light in the room, and Latte was still sitting there.

"Hey, Jiang Ze is me. Is Shui Xin okay?"

"It's nothing serious, I'm just scared by your impulsive appearance."

"Jiang Ze, I'm sorry, I didn't know you had slept with him..."

Jiang Ze on the other end of the phone was a little surprised. The first thing that surprised him was that Ning Fei actually said sorry. He is a person who never bows his head.The second surprise was that Shui Xin would tell him about it. Jiang Ze glanced at the person sitting on the sofa, and he thought that Shui Xin would not want to mention it, and thought it was Shui Xin's whim.I never thought that Ning Fei would specifically call to apologize because of this matter, as if...as if he and Shui Xin had a serious relationship.

"Hey, are you listening to what I'm saying?"

"Ah? What?" Jiang Ze focused on the phone again.

"I said that I heard that there is a lack of a warm-up singer in your hometown today? You can introduce me there."

"Ah? Are you going?" Jiang Ze was even more surprised, "Ning Fei, that's not some sort of event with a lot of attention. You know the wedding company in my hometown. To put it bluntly, the company is actually a small shop in the county. , all the jobs in the countryside.” Jiang Ze suspected that Ning Fei, who was picky about singing venues, couldn’t accept it, “You’re not kidding me, are you?”

"It's not a star, it's not that big. It's singing everywhere anyway."

Jiang Ze didn't believe it. There was a time in the past when the three of them almost couldn't get rid of the pot. Shui Xin half-jokingly asked Ning Fei to go to the street to sell and sing to earn some money for food, and Ning Fei shook his face on the spot.Jiang Ze didn't know how important singing was in Ning Fei's life, but he knew that singing was something that no one could make fun of in front of Ning Fei.

But now, it doesn't matter what Ning Fei says, it doesn't matter if she goes to sing on an adobe platform in the countryside, and it doesn't matter if someone knocks melon seeds and pretends to be a comment.

"Have you made up your mind?"

"Well, I figured it out."

"Then I'll contact you."

After hanging up the phone, Ning Fei looked up at the moon in the sky, it wasn't even half a moon, not a full moon, but Ning Fei still thought of Lin Chen's face when he smiled, the bulging cheeks, the corners of his lips and eyes were curved.

In the past twenty years of her life, Ning Fei has never felt bitter, whether she was cheated into debt or dishonored in doing dirty business.He didn't feel bitter, because he would think of Lin Chen's smiling face, just like a festive white porcelain doll, and he couldn't help laughing when he thought of it.It was the bright and clear moon that often hangs in front of him in his gloomy life.

But now, the moon he caused has no smile and is no longer full.Ning Fei has experienced the worst in life, it’s fine if he is stuck in the swamp, why even the best round of the moon has to be stuck because of himself, crying and saying that he hates himself like this?

Ning Fei looked at the first-quarter moon in the sky for a long time, and his mood suddenly returned to the pomegranate tree when he was 11 years old. At that time, he also said goodbye to Lin Qu. The mood was similar, but the situation was different. Ning Fei couldn’t talk to Lin Qu face to face. Saying goodbye, I can only say to the moon that is not full, "I'm leaving, Lin Qiu."